i am so incredibly lost.
financially fucked;
heavyhearted & hellbent.

good weekend though.
lots of alcohol.
lots of fabulous bitches.
lots of sun.
viva la sunburn!
and thank the lord for vodka.

i often wonder, how the hell i do it.

tonight...

i felt melissa's baby kick under my hand.
and i felt my heartbreak under my breath.

what is constant is how much i am still in love with him.
i know this will never change.
no matter what.

thanks to those of you willing to help me out tonight.
it's appreciated more than you know.

champange.

i don't know. he left me 27 hours ago. my body's still in shock.
it makes me a cynic. why am i un-loveable?
what is it about me that makes them leave so fast, without warning.
i'm jobless. dropped out. and loveless.
i'm a mess.

Edit:

and then there's always room for some body


( Read more... )

today, despite the rain, was completely enjoyable ( Read more... )

i have never been this happy. it's amazing. tonight, Chiodos and The Number 12 Looks Like You. with my best friend in the entire world.

i'm finding myself in that shy, girl way of stumbling over my words when i think of him. speechless. and grateful. and just so happy.

i don't know what i ever did. but my life is so fabulous right now.

so i bought an ipod. finally. i finally know what all the fuss is about. i remember last year, seeing basically everyone in Mrs. Hathaway's art class cutting, glueing, painting and drawing away with those unmistakeable little white headphones in their ears ( Read more... )

it's clear. so long as i can hold on to these feelings forever, i'll be fine. obstacles come and go. phases pass. but so long as i feel like this, i'll be fine.

it's never made so much sense. i never thought so much could happen in the course of 24 hrs. and leave me feeling wide awake.

i am so happy.

today was a pretty decent day. work was fast and ( Read more... )

so this is what it is ( Read more... )

i'm trying really hard, to be the shepard.