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Comments 17

melagan April 26 2016, 23:36:10 UTC
What a marvelous adventure to go along with the art. I liked the use of the ATA gene enabling the mutations and the translation matrix was cool. It gave it a nice sci-fi feel to it - just like an episode. :)

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jennytork April 27 2016, 13:55:10 UTC
Thank you so much! :D

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popkin16 April 27 2016, 07:56:00 UTC
This is such a neat, fun story. I love that Teyla and John just couldn't forget their unexpected meeting and returned - and both of them brought a friend :) I love that John could tell right away that he and Rodney would be friends - their banter just felt so natural - and I love that John and Ronon helped make the Athosian warriors better. I'm so glad Carson was okay, and you should definitely not mess with Radek Zelenka - or he'll stage a coup and defeat you. I feel terrible for the loss of Peter and Kavanaugh, but at least the casualty list wasn't higher. Sumner was absolutely insane and I'm glad he's out of the picture, or the expedition would have been so screwed. I'm really glad that Teyla and Ronon didn't judge all of John and Rodney's people by the actions of a few. I love Carson standing up to Sumner, being so brave, demanding they remove the listening devices and making his opinion on Sumner's orders clear. I love that John and Rodney are of both worlds now - I wonder if more people will ask for the gene therapy to allow ( ... )

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jennytork April 27 2016, 13:56:22 UTC
WOW, thank you for the marvelous feedback! I'm so happy you're bookmarking this -- there's no greater compliment to a writer than rereads!

(((HUG))) Thank you so much!! I'm so glad you're enjoying it!

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popkin16 April 27 2016, 23:38:46 UTC
You're so very welcome :D

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ferrous_wheeler April 28 2016, 01:58:50 UTC
Really enjoyed that! Such a creative twist on the characters, where it wasn't necessarily the best and brightest that got sent to Atlantis, but more the least liked and most expendable (at least for the military). And I'm kind of hoping that 'a beginning' means that there might be more :)

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jennytork April 28 2016, 03:48:16 UTC
Thank you very much!

And yeah, kind'a hoping it means more, too! Time will tell.

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mific April 30 2016, 03:23:41 UTC
Hi there! It took me ages to have time to read your story because I had to write a pinch hit which of course would not be short. Anyway, I have now, and I love it! It's great how you wove in Teyla and Ronon as the underwater indigenes, and John and Rodney being able to join them, with Carson's help. It was an interesting dystopia, with the military with dodgy track records making up the Atlantis contingent, kind of like transportation in the old days, and all in all it was a great read - very gripping and engaging. Carson was excellent, too - very in character. Thank you so much for writing such a cool story to go with the art!

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jennytork April 30 2016, 16:28:36 UTC
Thank you for letting me create this wonderful world off your brilliant artwork!

It was fun to.do! I hope we can collaborate again someday!

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helenkacan April 30 2016, 17:12:24 UTC
This was utterly enchanting! I really had no idea of what to expect when Sumner ordered the executions of John and Rodney (might have been different if puddlejumpers had been discovered). Carson pretending the mutation was a sedative was brilliant. And then realizing how crazy Sumner was gave me shivers.

I'd bet that things must have been very difficult in a sunken Atlantis when John and Rodney left. Probably just enough power in the ZPM to keep the shield intact, but otherwise a mostly uncomfortable place. If it weren't the drugs, or the fact that both military and scientists were considered damaged and expendable, then I could see people getting claustrophobic being trapped under so much water.

Your background premise also makes more plausible how the SGC could have sent an expedition with one Colonel with the next rank below being a Lieutenant (I'm obviously excluding John).

Also, hear me squeezing high-pitched dolphin sounds at the concept of the shield acting as a translation matrix. How fabulous!!!

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jennytork April 30 2016, 20:09:47 UTC
Wow!! Thank you SO much!!! That is a fantastic comment, and I am going to treasure it!

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