Geeky girls

[jelazakazone]

I was thinking about how when I was growing up in the '80s, there weren't a whole lot of girls reading scifi/fantasy.  I think in my high school class of 350, there were only 5-10 of us.  Maybe

Comments

[lillibet]

I can only think of one other person in my high school who read SF/F--he leant me the first Xanth book. We really only had one geek that I can think of. Most of my literary companionship came from my eldest sister, who steered me toward SF/F in the first place. My close friends at that age were all girls except for one boy. When I got to college, then things shifted and all my closest friends were male--most of them gay--although there were some great women in the crowd and I was friendly with them. It was only in my 30s that I really became comfortable with women as close friends. Now my closest friends are a mix again--my best friend is the man who's held that position since college and I have several other close male friends, but I've also developed strong relationships with several women. My larger community tends toward the geeky, many of whom are readers, and many of whom are involved in SF/F fandom, so I don't really notice that as a distinguishing feature.

[jelazakazone]

Wow. Only one other person in your high school who read scifi/f? We had boys who were reading (that was how I got into s/f in the first place), but hardly any girls. Same with college.

I always had close girl friends and there was a period of time where I didn't really have any close female friends, but then I became a mom and met other women who I had nothing in common with but and became friends with some of them.

[lillibet]

I feel like I've failed the mom-friend thing. There are moms of Alice's friends I like well enough, but we just never spend enough time together to actually become friends. I'm actually sort of hard to make that leap with, because I tend to a) be pretty busy, b) have Jason's presence in the house during the day, so I don't get lonely as I think many moms do, and c) have such a robust community that I don't have a lot of open valence for new friends. It's not impossible, but it's hard. I meet a lot of wonderful people through the theatre and our church and occasionally online and would love to spend the time with them to cement a friendship, but I already don't see my friends of long-standing enough.

[jelazakazone]

eh. Mom friends are over-rated. A lot of them just whine about their problems and never do anything to change anyone's behavior including their own. Some of my mom friends are great, don't get me wrong. But most of them aren't geeky like me.

I keep wondering when I'm going to find the other geeky 40somethings moms who don't get a paycheck either. I've found 2. One lives here, but she has a 2 year old so we rarely see each other and the other one lives in the UK.

[princealia]

Always, which was weird because I was more or less balanced as a kid. I had and still have a massive doll collection, a tea set, all that noise. But I also had matchbox cars, ninja turtle action figures and what have you. I think somewhere around my pre-teen/teen years, girls started getting into boys and becoming more feminine, and I was still rocking the baggy pants and video games. I kept up with them sort off (they were declaring their love over N*Sync and I was just jamming along to the songs, for example), but I've always felt more comfortable around boys. Girls just have a lot of problems, guys are really simple XD. I have a lot of girl friends now, but they tend to be on the nerdier side of the fence. I "get" them more.

[jelazakazone]

Heh. I recently suggested to DD1 that she might have an easier time hanging with boys because they are more straightforward. Seriously. Guys tend to be much easier (for me anyway) to understand. And they aren't usually interested in how stuff loos, which is a huge bonus for me cause I'm not all that attractive.

[jelazakazone]

Aw, so cute, the Redwall club:D

I realized in middle school that girls were playing some social game and I could play it if I wanted, but I decided I didn't want to go there. I wasn't very comfortable hanging out with guys when I was younger though. Eh. I've often felt out of step. This is why I'm so happy to have found fannish friends here. I've found my peeps:D

[jelazakazone]

I ♥ the internet for bringing geeky girls to me, one at a time. I ♥ Merlin for sucking me in:D

[celandineb]

I was a scifi/fantasy geek from grade school on - my mother read it, too, so it never seemed at all weird to me. And my sister did as well

[jelazakazone]

:D I've always had close female friends. I think that growing up a twin gave me a weird social experience:D I probably should have tried to hang out with boys more, but they always seemed so scary, for some unknown reason.

[jelazakazone]

I find that I'm more comfortable with men initially, but that I have deeper friendships with the women I connect with. Sounds like you are similar in that regard.

[jelazakazone]

Not sure who the "us" is here. I feel like there are women/girls out there who are not like me/us.