Gift fic for mimihyuuga
To: mimihyuuga
From: partypaprika
HAPPY HOLIDAYS!
Title: Trial and Error
Paring/Group:Ryoda, News/KAT-TUN
Rating:PG:13
Summary: Jin sees two friends in need and realizes he’s the only one who can help. And he only needs two tries to get it right. Or three.
Jin is not stupid. He may not be the brightest kid on the block, but he can put two and two together and get four. This meant that the current picture in front of Jin was finally starting to make sense. Ueda mostly seemed to be his normal self-he was flipping through a magazine and doing his best to steadfastly ignore all others in the room.
However, once Ryo entered the room, Ueda had turned marginally pinker and buried his head completely into his magazine.
Ryo, for his part, also seemed normal, completely ignoring Ueda except for a few comments thrown out about Ueda’s great ineptitude during his conversation with Maru. But once he finished the conversation, Jin saw Ryo glance over in Ueda’s direction. He smiled for a brief second before uttering a nonchalant comment about how KAT-TN deserved some kind of award for putting up with someone as pretentious as two Kame’s. Ueda’s head snapped up and he stalked over to Ryo, his face a deep red.
“Go bother your own band with your classless… idiocy! Instead of disturbing the peace around here!” Ryo bristled, his hands forming into fists at his side. He immediately made a comment about how he couldn’t hear any words, Ueda’s fish lips must have soaked up all the sound. Before Maru or any of KAT-TN could think to do anything, Ueda lifted his arm up as if to punch Ryo.
Luckily, Maru pounced on Ueda, sending him sprawling to the ground. Ueda groaned underneath Maru and Ryo just laughed, causing Ueda to shoot another venomous look at him. They both stared each other down, gazes locking until Koki coughed discreetly. Ryo whirled around and disappeared, muttering things about the demonic voices in Ueda’s head.
“Well, that was fun!” Maru announced trying to look cheerful.
“Maru….could you please get off of me?” Ueda grunted, trapped in the vicinity of Maru’s legs.
“Ah yes. Sorry.” As Maru helped Ueda up, Jin realized that something had to be done. Something had to be done.
Commence Operation Love
Part One: Casual Dinner
Materials:
1. Cell phone
2. Restaurant Reservations
3. JE Schedule
4. Drinks
5. Appetizers
6. Binoculars
7. Convenient spy spot
8. Trench coat
Like every good plan, Jin knew that in order for his plan to work, he’d have to do things slowly. And Discreetly. So Jin waited until after practice one day when Ueda was the only other member left before cornering him.
Ueda was packing up his clothes, unaware of the happiness that Jin would soon bring to his life, when Jin walked into the room.
Ueda would be hardest to convince. He tended to be a bit of a homebody, so Jin had decided on two plans of action. Plan A: he would be the good friend/co-worker who was inviting his other friend out for dinner. Plan B: Jin would go for the guilt factor and pout, using a trembling lip for extra emphasis.
“Uebo-hime,” Jin started. “I’ve been thinking.”
“That’s always a dangerous area,” Ueda started. “Remember the last time you ‘thought’? We all ended up cleaning half the rooms of the Jimusho in order to get rid of the paint.” Jin paused. This did not seem like a good start. Jin mentally pressed reset and started from the beginning.
“Hey! Have you tried that restaurant near my house? The new one? It’s supposed to be really good.” Jin waved his hands a couple times to indicate just how good the food was supposed to be.
“No…But I’m not really in the mood for going out tonight.” Ueda patted Jin’s arm before turning back to his bag.
“Well, it’s good. Really good. So good in fact, I’m going to go there tonight! You should come with me. Because I’ve already made a reservation for us.”
Ueda just rolled his eyes. “Well cancel it. Or take Yamapi. I’m really exhausted from practice today and we have to get up early tomorrow. I just don’t have the energy to go out.”
Ok, Jin thought. Now for Plan B. “Please Uebo. I really want to just go with you.” After the ‘you’, he let his lip start trembling ever so slightly. Ueda just sighed.
“No Jin. Not tonight.”
Jin frowned. This was most definitely not going to either plan. Drastic Measures needed to be taken.
“I can’t take anyone else,” he said imploringly. “This restaurant makes you make a reservation in the name of both people. And if you don’t all show up or you cancel….” He thought desperately. “Then you can never eat there again! And-and-and it’s supposed to be really amazing!” Ueda was staring at Jin warily and Jin had sudden visions of his plan never working and Ryo and Ueda having years of unresolved sexual tension and never acting on it. The horror of it made Jin involuntarily start to tear up.
“Please, Uebo. Please.” Ueda gave an exasperated sigh and Jin knew he had won.
“Fine. Fine! Don’t cry Jin. Just tell me where the restaurant is and when I have to be there. And you owe me big.”
Jin squealed and enveloped Ueda in a huge hug. “Yeah! Thank you Tat-chan.” Ueda grumbled but Jin could already feel victory in the wind.
After Ueda had gone home, Jin put the second (and easier) part of his plan into action. Still lounging in the dressing room, he called up Ryo.
“Hey Ryo,” he started.
“Bakanishi. What are you wasting my time for?”
Jin paused for a moment. This had been a little tricky-thinking of a way to get Ryo to agree. “I had an argument with Pi,”
“Look, I understand that I am incredibly smart and brilliant, but I am not solving the insignificant problems between you and that idiot.”
“Well we didn’t get into a fight with each other really. Just a fight about you.” Jin said slowly. There was a pause as Jin could hear Ryo actually start paying attention.
“What about me?” Jin smiled triumphantly.
Five minutes later, Jin had Ryo angrily announcing that he was a very social person who was not scared to try new things and just watch he was going to show that idiot Yamashita Tomohisa that he knew how to have a great time.
Jin patted himself on the back. Man was he good.
Like the mastermind planner that he was, Jin arrived at the restaurant extra early. He snuck in and then skillfully maneuvered a large plant right behind Ryo and Ueda’s table. He’d already made dinner arrangements ahead of time, so all he had to do was watch and wait.
Looking through the leaves, Jin saw Ryo arrive first, growling the entire way into the restaurant about how incredibly stupid Yamapi was. Most of the patrons looked away before Ryo made eye contact with them, but Jin heard a couple shrieks of the unfortunate few who hadn’t turned away as Ryo settled into the table, daring anyone to mess with him.
Jin blinked a couple times and looked at his phone, wondering if he should warn Ueda. No, Jin steeled himself and in a moment of bravery turned off his phone and then removed the battery for good measure.
In the back of Jin’s mind, as he watched Ryo curse Yamapi, he wondered if he should have warned Yamapi about using him in the plan, but dismissed it as soon as Ueda entered.
Ueda walked in a little hesitantly, checking first with the waiter to find the table and then glancing around to get a view of the patrons. Every couple steps, he stopped and glanced around before sending helpless looks at the entrance.
After what seemed like forever, Ueda got to the table, but he was so busy looking back at the door that he missed Ryo at first. Jin watched as Ueda finally turned towards the table and his face changed from a resigned look of pain to one of pure horror. Ryo chose that moment to look up from glaring and making threats in the direction of his menu to see an open-mouthed Ueda standing in front of him.
Ryo’s glare instantaneously became more venomous. “What do you think you’re doing here, fish lips?” He spat out. Ueda’s mouth snapped shut and he slowly shook his head.
“I was supposed to be meeting Jin, not some slimy toad with a height issue.” Ueda responded almost unconsciously.
“Were you sent on a Gackt-given mission to ruin the evenings of all the people in the restaurant with your mere presence?” Ryo said. “I’m supposed to be meeting Jin.”
“No. I was.”
“Look fairy boy, you must’ve had some delusional dream with fairies telling you to come.”
“Hey! Fuck off. There were no delusions or fairies. Jin told me to come this afternoon.” Ueda trailed off while Ryo slowly restated that Jin had clearly only told him.
They both looked at each other warily before they came to the same conclusion and whipped out their cell phones.
Jin was definitely glad he’d thought of taking out the battery.
After a minute of trying and getting voicemail, Ueda sat down, his face seeming slightly dazed. Ryo held up his phone as if he was considering throwing it at Ueda’s head. After a moment of serious consideration, Ueda spoke up-his voice speaking of incredible pain and despair.
“I can’t believe that Jin would do something as horrific as intentionally make me spend time with….” Ueda said slowly.
Ryo dropped his arm and made a face. Ryo made a face. “It’s not like I want to be here any more than you. Ugh. Just breathing the same air as you makes me feel uglier.”
Ueda’s eyes narrowed just as a waiter brought over some pre ordered (by Jin!) appetizers and drinks. As soon as the waiter set them down, Ueda politely told the waiter they hadn’t ordered anything while Ryo proclaimed fiercely that he was definitely not staying. The waiter, probably well trained in dealing with crazy people, gave them a bored look. “Your dinner and drinks have already been taken care of. If you need anything, feel free to let me know.”
Ueda and Ryo stared at each other for a second before they both warily sipped their drinks.
“I bet Jin ditched you because he realized just how lame you are.” Ryo said smiling at Ueda. Ueda turned a deep red and gaped for a couple seconds before leaning in.
“Well he ditched you too. So I guess you’re just as lame as me.” Ryo just laughed.
“You’re so original!” Ryo brought his head in as well, so their faces were directly opposite each other. Ueda turned even redder before Ryo finished speaking again. “I don’t know how your band mates put up with you. It must be a type of charity project.” Ueda’s face set and Jin only had a second to think that maybe should go stop Ueda from doing something stupid when Ueda threw his drink at Ryo.
Ryo growled and launched himself at Ueda and they both fell over, hitting the table and knocking their glasses and plates to the ground.
While Jin watched Ryo and Ueda hit and break almost every object within reach, he wondered if he should go and stop them. Before he could think of a way that wouldn’t get him simultaneously killed by both of them, a helpful nearby waiter broke up the fight and escorted a still screaming Ryo and Ueda to the door. Not quite so helpfully, the same waiter also spotted Jin and informed Jin that he would be paying the restaurant damages.
Preliminary Operation Love Results:
Restaurant Damages: $70
Band mates currently talking to Jin: 4
News Members talking to Jin: 5
Bruises on Ryo: 5
Bruises on Uebo: 3
Make-up Artists angry at Jin: 6
Conclusion: Slight setback in terms of results, but good enthusiastic response.
Jin watched both Ueda and Ryo for the next week-from a distance because both were still not talking to him-and to the casual observer everything might look the same. Vicious comments, near fights, the usual. But Jin was no casual observer. He noticed how Ueda started blushing any time that Ryo entered the nearby vicinity and consequently hid with a magazine in a corner.
Ryo increased his verbal lashings whenever he and Ueda were in the same room, but when he thought no one was looking, he snuck looks at Ueda. Jin wouldn’t quite describe them as lingering glances, but Ryo seemed to stare until he forced himself to look away. It was the perfect time to institute plan two.
Unfortunately for Jin, he had counted on Ryo and Ueda forgiving him and talking to him after a week. And it was pretty clear that wasn’t going to happen. Which thwarted his original plan two, Sexy Concert Time, because neither looked like they would accept any kind of tickets from Jin. But Jin knew he had to figure out something fast or else all of his work from part one would go to waste.
Yamapi invited himself over to complain about Ryo’s new irrational behavior. He was in the middle of detailing how Ryo would trip him constantly in the dressing room when Jin was struck by a brilliant idea.
“-also keeps muttering that he knows how to have a good time. And glares at me!”
“Hey Pi, want to help me get Ryo and Ueda together?” Yamapi paused his monologue to stare open-mouthed at Jin.
“But why? They….hate each other. Remember?” Yamapi finally managed to get out. He looked around the room as if to see if there are secret cameras. Finding none he turned back to Jin.
“No, they only think that they hate each other. Well, I mean they probably hate each other a lot, but deep down, they probably also like each other a lot.” Yamapi stared again. Jin sighed and tried to think of a better way to explain it. “Whenever they’re in the same room, there’s something between them, where neither one can stop looking at the other one, right?” Yamapi slowly nodded.
“Is this when they’re hitting each other? Or when we pull them apart?”
“No, no, no.” Jin sighed. “Like they seem to focus on each other a lot. In maybe more than sworn-enemies-to-the-death kind of a way.”
“Ryo does seem to fixate on Ueda’s lips,” Yamapi said thoughtfully, starting to smile. “Exactly, but now we have to figure out somewhere to force them to be together. So that they realize their true feelings. Somewhere maybe where they have to touch each other.” Jin says thoughtfully. Yamapi smiled, a wide smiling reaching all the way to his eyes.
“I have the perfect idea.”
Operation Love Part Two: Sexy Photoshoot
Materials:
1. Cell phone
2. Photographer
3. Shiori-chan
4. Partner-in-Crime
5. Pajamas
6. Bed
Yamapi first called up the photographer’s assistant for the upcoming KAT-TUN/News shoot and with a low and seductive voice, winking at Jin. “Why hello Shiori-chan… I’m very excited to see you at the upcoming shoot.” Jin could almost hear the girl giggling hysterically threw the phone.
Jin bit his lip as he watched Yamapi. Shiori-chan wouldn’t be able to help if she laughed herself to death.
“We want her to help. NOT die before she even manages to talk to her boss.” He whispered. Yamapi just nodded again, smiling slightly and turning his attention back to the phone.
“So I need a favor, and I was wondering if my favorite assistant might be willing to help?” Yamapi listened for a second before giving Jin a thumbs up.
Jin and Yamapi were the first to the shooting, prompting a sleepy Kame to give them a wary look when he arrived on set. Kame watched them for a second and opened his mouth before thinking better of it and heading over to the stylists.
Once everyone had arrived, the photographer announced the theme for the shoot. “Keeping with the idea of Christmas, we’ve decided to do this shoot as Santa’s elves at home doing various activities.” Shiori-chan shot a triumphant look at Yamapi and Jin before starting to hand out the mandatory Santa hats. Jin just stared as Shiori-chan handed out the themed Santa hats to each member. But when she got to Jin and gave him his Santa hat decorated with various English phrases, she gave him a wink before moving on and professionally presenting Koki with his gangster-themed Santa hat.
After the main group shots, the photographer called everyone to announce who would be shot together. Tegoshi and Koki high fived, as did Koyama and Maru. Jin was surprised to hear that he and Yamapi would also be together, but Yamapi shot him a smug look that left no questions needing to be asked. As the photographer got to the end of the list of names, Ryo and Ueda began to look increasingly uncomfortable.
When Ryo and Ueda’s names were finally called, together, Ueda cast a panicked look in Kame’s direction before gathering himself together and glaring at Ryo. Ryo glared at Ueda and muttered a spiteful comment about Gackt-wannabes.
Trying to be discrete, Yamapi and Jin waited on set while Ryo and Ueda started prepping for their shots. Shiori-chan smiled in their direction as she announced the goal for their specific shot. “Keeping with our theme, you two will be elves waking up in the morning.” She thrust some pajama bottoms at them and for the first time all day, Ryo looked nervous.
“What about the shirts?” He asked slowly. The assistant regarded him for a moment. “You are elves waking up. No shirts are needed. We’ll start with shots of you two in bed together in five.”
There was a horrified silence for about four of the next five minutes. Only when the various tech people started coming over did Ryo and Ueda remember they had to be wearing their pajama bottoms and ran for the bathroom, Ryo not so subtly pushing Ueda out of the way.
When they returned, Ueda was whispering to himself that they probably wouldn’t even have to touch while Ryo seemed to in some shock.
The photographer completely ignored their protests and ordered them into the bed. “I want you to look like you’re waking up, excited to make gifts.” For once, Ryo said nothing, just scooted over to the far side of the bed, putting as much distance in between him and Ueda.
The photographer made an impatient sound. “No no. Not like that. Waking up together with your best elf friend. Closer! Arms around each other. Excellent!”
By the time the photographer was finished, Ryo and Ueda had been positioned so closely, they were practically wrapped around each other.
They ended up being positioned together in bed, almost wrapped around each other. The already flushed Ueda had become so red; Jin was surprised he hadn’t spontaneously combusted. The usually talkative and verbally abusive Ryo also seemed unable to find his tongue. Jin noted with satisfaction that every time Ryo and Ueda were asked to hug or sling their arms around each other, Ryo looked a little more strained and close to cracking. This couldn’t possibly go better.
But then the shoot ended, and both Ueda and Ryo scrambled off in different directions. Jin didn’t understand. Why weren’t they going to go make-out in the dressing room? What was wrong with them?
“I agree!” Yamapi said. “What’s wrong with them?” Jin blinked a couple times.
“Can you read minds?” He asked slowly. It would explain so much.
“Oh no,” Yamapi smiled. “You were speaking out loud.” They both thought for a couple seconds until Jin lit up.
“I’ve got it!” He announced triumphantly. “If they won’t get together on their own…we’ll just have to force them.” Yamapi nodded, comprehension dawning.
“The closet on the second floor?” He asked as they both ran out the door. Jin shouted yes as he ran towards the KAT-TUN dressing.
“Ueda! Come quick!” He shouted in the room. Ueda emerged a few seconds later.
He looked a little confused, and still quite red. “What is it?” Jin just grabbed Ueda’s hand and started running.
“You have to come here!”
“Where’s here?” Ueda asked, looking slightly perplexed to find himself running through the halls of the Jimusho.
Jin and Yamapi reached the closet at the same time and Ryo and Ueda seemed to realize what exactly was going on just as they were thrust into a closet by their respective bandmates. In a fumbling motion, Jin managed to lock the door. The two best friends high-fived as Ryo and Ueda both pounded against the wall.
“This is all your fault, idiot.” They heard Ryo yell. There was some more yelling that might’ve been Ueda followed by the thud of some heavy objects hitting the wall.
“You donkey faced loser!” More crashes, perhaps someone being thrown against the wall.
“You bird brained jerk!” Another someone being thrown against a wall. And then there was a large amount of silence. Jin debated between leaving and hoping everything turned out for the best, or checking to make sure that they were both alive and conscious.
Slowly he opened up the door, Yamapi right behind him and tried to make out the figures in the dark. The first thing he saw was Ryo pressing Ueda up to the wall, Ryo’s hands splayed against Ueda’s t-shirt and Ueda’s hands grabbing desperately in Ryo’s hair.
Jin could say with some certainty they were kissing passionately before they broke apart for a second. Ueda made a growling noise and pushed Ryo against the opposite wall. Jin decided that was as good a time as any to close the door. Wow, he thought, good job to me.
From: partypaprika
HAPPY HOLIDAYS!
Title: Trial and Error
Paring/Group:Ryoda, News/KAT-TUN
Rating:PG:13
Summary: Jin sees two friends in need and realizes he’s the only one who can help. And he only needs two tries to get it right. Or three.
Jin is not stupid. He may not be the brightest kid on the block, but he can put two and two together and get four. This meant that the current picture in front of Jin was finally starting to make sense. Ueda mostly seemed to be his normal self-he was flipping through a magazine and doing his best to steadfastly ignore all others in the room.
However, once Ryo entered the room, Ueda had turned marginally pinker and buried his head completely into his magazine.
Ryo, for his part, also seemed normal, completely ignoring Ueda except for a few comments thrown out about Ueda’s great ineptitude during his conversation with Maru. But once he finished the conversation, Jin saw Ryo glance over in Ueda’s direction. He smiled for a brief second before uttering a nonchalant comment about how KAT-TN deserved some kind of award for putting up with someone as pretentious as two Kame’s. Ueda’s head snapped up and he stalked over to Ryo, his face a deep red.
“Go bother your own band with your classless… idiocy! Instead of disturbing the peace around here!” Ryo bristled, his hands forming into fists at his side. He immediately made a comment about how he couldn’t hear any words, Ueda’s fish lips must have soaked up all the sound. Before Maru or any of KAT-TN could think to do anything, Ueda lifted his arm up as if to punch Ryo.
Luckily, Maru pounced on Ueda, sending him sprawling to the ground. Ueda groaned underneath Maru and Ryo just laughed, causing Ueda to shoot another venomous look at him. They both stared each other down, gazes locking until Koki coughed discreetly. Ryo whirled around and disappeared, muttering things about the demonic voices in Ueda’s head.
“Well, that was fun!” Maru announced trying to look cheerful.
“Maru….could you please get off of me?” Ueda grunted, trapped in the vicinity of Maru’s legs.
“Ah yes. Sorry.” As Maru helped Ueda up, Jin realized that something had to be done. Something had to be done.
Commence Operation Love
Part One: Casual Dinner
Materials:
1. Cell phone
2. Restaurant Reservations
3. JE Schedule
4. Drinks
5. Appetizers
6. Binoculars
7. Convenient spy spot
8. Trench coat
Like every good plan, Jin knew that in order for his plan to work, he’d have to do things slowly. And Discreetly. So Jin waited until after practice one day when Ueda was the only other member left before cornering him.
Ueda was packing up his clothes, unaware of the happiness that Jin would soon bring to his life, when Jin walked into the room.
Ueda would be hardest to convince. He tended to be a bit of a homebody, so Jin had decided on two plans of action. Plan A: he would be the good friend/co-worker who was inviting his other friend out for dinner. Plan B: Jin would go for the guilt factor and pout, using a trembling lip for extra emphasis.
“Uebo-hime,” Jin started. “I’ve been thinking.”
“That’s always a dangerous area,” Ueda started. “Remember the last time you ‘thought’? We all ended up cleaning half the rooms of the Jimusho in order to get rid of the paint.” Jin paused. This did not seem like a good start. Jin mentally pressed reset and started from the beginning.
“Hey! Have you tried that restaurant near my house? The new one? It’s supposed to be really good.” Jin waved his hands a couple times to indicate just how good the food was supposed to be.
“No…But I’m not really in the mood for going out tonight.” Ueda patted Jin’s arm before turning back to his bag.
“Well, it’s good. Really good. So good in fact, I’m going to go there tonight! You should come with me. Because I’ve already made a reservation for us.”
Ueda just rolled his eyes. “Well cancel it. Or take Yamapi. I’m really exhausted from practice today and we have to get up early tomorrow. I just don’t have the energy to go out.”
Ok, Jin thought. Now for Plan B. “Please Uebo. I really want to just go with you.” After the ‘you’, he let his lip start trembling ever so slightly. Ueda just sighed.
“No Jin. Not tonight.”
Jin frowned. This was most definitely not going to either plan. Drastic Measures needed to be taken.
“I can’t take anyone else,” he said imploringly. “This restaurant makes you make a reservation in the name of both people. And if you don’t all show up or you cancel….” He thought desperately. “Then you can never eat there again! And-and-and it’s supposed to be really amazing!” Ueda was staring at Jin warily and Jin had sudden visions of his plan never working and Ryo and Ueda having years of unresolved sexual tension and never acting on it. The horror of it made Jin involuntarily start to tear up.
“Please, Uebo. Please.” Ueda gave an exasperated sigh and Jin knew he had won.
“Fine. Fine! Don’t cry Jin. Just tell me where the restaurant is and when I have to be there. And you owe me big.”
Jin squealed and enveloped Ueda in a huge hug. “Yeah! Thank you Tat-chan.” Ueda grumbled but Jin could already feel victory in the wind.
After Ueda had gone home, Jin put the second (and easier) part of his plan into action. Still lounging in the dressing room, he called up Ryo.
“Hey Ryo,” he started.
“Bakanishi. What are you wasting my time for?”
Jin paused for a moment. This had been a little tricky-thinking of a way to get Ryo to agree. “I had an argument with Pi,”
“Look, I understand that I am incredibly smart and brilliant, but I am not solving the insignificant problems between you and that idiot.”
“Well we didn’t get into a fight with each other really. Just a fight about you.” Jin said slowly. There was a pause as Jin could hear Ryo actually start paying attention.
“What about me?” Jin smiled triumphantly.
Five minutes later, Jin had Ryo angrily announcing that he was a very social person who was not scared to try new things and just watch he was going to show that idiot Yamashita Tomohisa that he knew how to have a great time.
Jin patted himself on the back. Man was he good.
Like the mastermind planner that he was, Jin arrived at the restaurant extra early. He snuck in and then skillfully maneuvered a large plant right behind Ryo and Ueda’s table. He’d already made dinner arrangements ahead of time, so all he had to do was watch and wait.
Looking through the leaves, Jin saw Ryo arrive first, growling the entire way into the restaurant about how incredibly stupid Yamapi was. Most of the patrons looked away before Ryo made eye contact with them, but Jin heard a couple shrieks of the unfortunate few who hadn’t turned away as Ryo settled into the table, daring anyone to mess with him.
Jin blinked a couple times and looked at his phone, wondering if he should warn Ueda. No, Jin steeled himself and in a moment of bravery turned off his phone and then removed the battery for good measure.
In the back of Jin’s mind, as he watched Ryo curse Yamapi, he wondered if he should have warned Yamapi about using him in the plan, but dismissed it as soon as Ueda entered.
Ueda walked in a little hesitantly, checking first with the waiter to find the table and then glancing around to get a view of the patrons. Every couple steps, he stopped and glanced around before sending helpless looks at the entrance.
After what seemed like forever, Ueda got to the table, but he was so busy looking back at the door that he missed Ryo at first. Jin watched as Ueda finally turned towards the table and his face changed from a resigned look of pain to one of pure horror. Ryo chose that moment to look up from glaring and making threats in the direction of his menu to see an open-mouthed Ueda standing in front of him.
Ryo’s glare instantaneously became more venomous. “What do you think you’re doing here, fish lips?” He spat out. Ueda’s mouth snapped shut and he slowly shook his head.
“I was supposed to be meeting Jin, not some slimy toad with a height issue.” Ueda responded almost unconsciously.
“Were you sent on a Gackt-given mission to ruin the evenings of all the people in the restaurant with your mere presence?” Ryo said. “I’m supposed to be meeting Jin.”
“No. I was.”
“Look fairy boy, you must’ve had some delusional dream with fairies telling you to come.”
“Hey! Fuck off. There were no delusions or fairies. Jin told me to come this afternoon.” Ueda trailed off while Ryo slowly restated that Jin had clearly only told him.
They both looked at each other warily before they came to the same conclusion and whipped out their cell phones.
Jin was definitely glad he’d thought of taking out the battery.
After a minute of trying and getting voicemail, Ueda sat down, his face seeming slightly dazed. Ryo held up his phone as if he was considering throwing it at Ueda’s head. After a moment of serious consideration, Ueda spoke up-his voice speaking of incredible pain and despair.
“I can’t believe that Jin would do something as horrific as intentionally make me spend time with….” Ueda said slowly.
Ryo dropped his arm and made a face. Ryo made a face. “It’s not like I want to be here any more than you. Ugh. Just breathing the same air as you makes me feel uglier.”
Ueda’s eyes narrowed just as a waiter brought over some pre ordered (by Jin!) appetizers and drinks. As soon as the waiter set them down, Ueda politely told the waiter they hadn’t ordered anything while Ryo proclaimed fiercely that he was definitely not staying. The waiter, probably well trained in dealing with crazy people, gave them a bored look. “Your dinner and drinks have already been taken care of. If you need anything, feel free to let me know.”
Ueda and Ryo stared at each other for a second before they both warily sipped their drinks.
“I bet Jin ditched you because he realized just how lame you are.” Ryo said smiling at Ueda. Ueda turned a deep red and gaped for a couple seconds before leaning in.
“Well he ditched you too. So I guess you’re just as lame as me.” Ryo just laughed.
“You’re so original!” Ryo brought his head in as well, so their faces were directly opposite each other. Ueda turned even redder before Ryo finished speaking again. “I don’t know how your band mates put up with you. It must be a type of charity project.” Ueda’s face set and Jin only had a second to think that maybe should go stop Ueda from doing something stupid when Ueda threw his drink at Ryo.
Ryo growled and launched himself at Ueda and they both fell over, hitting the table and knocking their glasses and plates to the ground.
While Jin watched Ryo and Ueda hit and break almost every object within reach, he wondered if he should go and stop them. Before he could think of a way that wouldn’t get him simultaneously killed by both of them, a helpful nearby waiter broke up the fight and escorted a still screaming Ryo and Ueda to the door. Not quite so helpfully, the same waiter also spotted Jin and informed Jin that he would be paying the restaurant damages.
Preliminary Operation Love Results:
Restaurant Damages: $70
Band mates currently talking to Jin: 4
News Members talking to Jin: 5
Bruises on Ryo: 5
Bruises on Uebo: 3
Make-up Artists angry at Jin: 6
Conclusion: Slight setback in terms of results, but good enthusiastic response.
Jin watched both Ueda and Ryo for the next week-from a distance because both were still not talking to him-and to the casual observer everything might look the same. Vicious comments, near fights, the usual. But Jin was no casual observer. He noticed how Ueda started blushing any time that Ryo entered the nearby vicinity and consequently hid with a magazine in a corner.
Ryo increased his verbal lashings whenever he and Ueda were in the same room, but when he thought no one was looking, he snuck looks at Ueda. Jin wouldn’t quite describe them as lingering glances, but Ryo seemed to stare until he forced himself to look away. It was the perfect time to institute plan two.
Unfortunately for Jin, he had counted on Ryo and Ueda forgiving him and talking to him after a week. And it was pretty clear that wasn’t going to happen. Which thwarted his original plan two, Sexy Concert Time, because neither looked like they would accept any kind of tickets from Jin. But Jin knew he had to figure out something fast or else all of his work from part one would go to waste.
Yamapi invited himself over to complain about Ryo’s new irrational behavior. He was in the middle of detailing how Ryo would trip him constantly in the dressing room when Jin was struck by a brilliant idea.
“-also keeps muttering that he knows how to have a good time. And glares at me!”
“Hey Pi, want to help me get Ryo and Ueda together?” Yamapi paused his monologue to stare open-mouthed at Jin.
“But why? They….hate each other. Remember?” Yamapi finally managed to get out. He looked around the room as if to see if there are secret cameras. Finding none he turned back to Jin.
“No, they only think that they hate each other. Well, I mean they probably hate each other a lot, but deep down, they probably also like each other a lot.” Yamapi stared again. Jin sighed and tried to think of a better way to explain it. “Whenever they’re in the same room, there’s something between them, where neither one can stop looking at the other one, right?” Yamapi slowly nodded.
“Is this when they’re hitting each other? Or when we pull them apart?”
“No, no, no.” Jin sighed. “Like they seem to focus on each other a lot. In maybe more than sworn-enemies-to-the-death kind of a way.”
“Ryo does seem to fixate on Ueda’s lips,” Yamapi said thoughtfully, starting to smile. “Exactly, but now we have to figure out somewhere to force them to be together. So that they realize their true feelings. Somewhere maybe where they have to touch each other.” Jin says thoughtfully. Yamapi smiled, a wide smiling reaching all the way to his eyes.
“I have the perfect idea.”
Operation Love Part Two: Sexy Photoshoot
Materials:
1. Cell phone
2. Photographer
3. Shiori-chan
4. Partner-in-Crime
5. Pajamas
6. Bed
Yamapi first called up the photographer’s assistant for the upcoming KAT-TUN/News shoot and with a low and seductive voice, winking at Jin. “Why hello Shiori-chan… I’m very excited to see you at the upcoming shoot.” Jin could almost hear the girl giggling hysterically threw the phone.
Jin bit his lip as he watched Yamapi. Shiori-chan wouldn’t be able to help if she laughed herself to death.
“We want her to help. NOT die before she even manages to talk to her boss.” He whispered. Yamapi just nodded again, smiling slightly and turning his attention back to the phone.
“So I need a favor, and I was wondering if my favorite assistant might be willing to help?” Yamapi listened for a second before giving Jin a thumbs up.
Jin and Yamapi were the first to the shooting, prompting a sleepy Kame to give them a wary look when he arrived on set. Kame watched them for a second and opened his mouth before thinking better of it and heading over to the stylists.
Once everyone had arrived, the photographer announced the theme for the shoot. “Keeping with the idea of Christmas, we’ve decided to do this shoot as Santa’s elves at home doing various activities.” Shiori-chan shot a triumphant look at Yamapi and Jin before starting to hand out the mandatory Santa hats. Jin just stared as Shiori-chan handed out the themed Santa hats to each member. But when she got to Jin and gave him his Santa hat decorated with various English phrases, she gave him a wink before moving on and professionally presenting Koki with his gangster-themed Santa hat.
After the main group shots, the photographer called everyone to announce who would be shot together. Tegoshi and Koki high fived, as did Koyama and Maru. Jin was surprised to hear that he and Yamapi would also be together, but Yamapi shot him a smug look that left no questions needing to be asked. As the photographer got to the end of the list of names, Ryo and Ueda began to look increasingly uncomfortable.
When Ryo and Ueda’s names were finally called, together, Ueda cast a panicked look in Kame’s direction before gathering himself together and glaring at Ryo. Ryo glared at Ueda and muttered a spiteful comment about Gackt-wannabes.
Trying to be discrete, Yamapi and Jin waited on set while Ryo and Ueda started prepping for their shots. Shiori-chan smiled in their direction as she announced the goal for their specific shot. “Keeping with our theme, you two will be elves waking up in the morning.” She thrust some pajama bottoms at them and for the first time all day, Ryo looked nervous.
“What about the shirts?” He asked slowly. The assistant regarded him for a moment. “You are elves waking up. No shirts are needed. We’ll start with shots of you two in bed together in five.”
There was a horrified silence for about four of the next five minutes. Only when the various tech people started coming over did Ryo and Ueda remember they had to be wearing their pajama bottoms and ran for the bathroom, Ryo not so subtly pushing Ueda out of the way.
When they returned, Ueda was whispering to himself that they probably wouldn’t even have to touch while Ryo seemed to in some shock.
The photographer completely ignored their protests and ordered them into the bed. “I want you to look like you’re waking up, excited to make gifts.” For once, Ryo said nothing, just scooted over to the far side of the bed, putting as much distance in between him and Ueda.
The photographer made an impatient sound. “No no. Not like that. Waking up together with your best elf friend. Closer! Arms around each other. Excellent!”
By the time the photographer was finished, Ryo and Ueda had been positioned so closely, they were practically wrapped around each other.
They ended up being positioned together in bed, almost wrapped around each other. The already flushed Ueda had become so red; Jin was surprised he hadn’t spontaneously combusted. The usually talkative and verbally abusive Ryo also seemed unable to find his tongue. Jin noted with satisfaction that every time Ryo and Ueda were asked to hug or sling their arms around each other, Ryo looked a little more strained and close to cracking. This couldn’t possibly go better.
But then the shoot ended, and both Ueda and Ryo scrambled off in different directions. Jin didn’t understand. Why weren’t they going to go make-out in the dressing room? What was wrong with them?
“I agree!” Yamapi said. “What’s wrong with them?” Jin blinked a couple times.
“Can you read minds?” He asked slowly. It would explain so much.
“Oh no,” Yamapi smiled. “You were speaking out loud.” They both thought for a couple seconds until Jin lit up.
“I’ve got it!” He announced triumphantly. “If they won’t get together on their own…we’ll just have to force them.” Yamapi nodded, comprehension dawning.
“The closet on the second floor?” He asked as they both ran out the door. Jin shouted yes as he ran towards the KAT-TUN dressing.
“Ueda! Come quick!” He shouted in the room. Ueda emerged a few seconds later.
He looked a little confused, and still quite red. “What is it?” Jin just grabbed Ueda’s hand and started running.
“You have to come here!”
“Where’s here?” Ueda asked, looking slightly perplexed to find himself running through the halls of the Jimusho.
Jin and Yamapi reached the closet at the same time and Ryo and Ueda seemed to realize what exactly was going on just as they were thrust into a closet by their respective bandmates. In a fumbling motion, Jin managed to lock the door. The two best friends high-fived as Ryo and Ueda both pounded against the wall.
“This is all your fault, idiot.” They heard Ryo yell. There was some more yelling that might’ve been Ueda followed by the thud of some heavy objects hitting the wall.
“You donkey faced loser!” More crashes, perhaps someone being thrown against the wall.
“You bird brained jerk!” Another someone being thrown against a wall. And then there was a large amount of silence. Jin debated between leaving and hoping everything turned out for the best, or checking to make sure that they were both alive and conscious.
Slowly he opened up the door, Yamapi right behind him and tried to make out the figures in the dark. The first thing he saw was Ryo pressing Ueda up to the wall, Ryo’s hands splayed against Ueda’s t-shirt and Ueda’s hands grabbing desperately in Ryo’s hair.
Jin could say with some certainty they were kissing passionately before they broke apart for a second. Ueda made a growling noise and pushed Ryo against the opposite wall. Jin decided that was as good a time as any to close the door. Wow, he thought, good job to me.