Fic: As Morning Shows the Day, [part 11]

[jade_dragoness]

Title: As Morning Shows the Day [Part 11]
Author: J.D. aka jade_dragoness
Rating: PG-13, for language. Gen
Pairing: K/S pre-slash/friendship
Status: WIP
Spoilers: Star Trek XI
Warning: Dangerous & Near Fatal Levels of Cuteness
Summary: Based on the switched version of the prompt: A de-aged fic where Spock has to take care of a kid-Kirk; preferably Kirk only listens to Spock, and freaks out when he's not around. (Or, you know, switched). Written for the st_xi_kink meme, found here.
Word Count: 6,355 for this part [total so far: 59,075]
Disclaimer: Never ever will be mine. *sadness*
A/N: Part Eleven! Movie night rolls on!
As always, feedback is hugely welcomed. Also, please feel free to point out any errors I missed.
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[“The childhood shows the man, as morning shows the day” - John Milton ]
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[Part One]
[Part Two]
[Part Three]
[Part Four]
[Part Five]
[Part Six]
[Part Seven]
[Part Eight]
[Part Nine]
[Part Ten]

“Is this film similar to the Wizard of Oz?” asked Spock, as he returned the lid to his tub of kettle popcorn and set it back onto the deck. His legs were so short that his sneakers didn’t even touch the top of the tub. Spock then pulled out his PADD and left it on his lap as he waited for the movie to begin.

“Well, kind of,” answered Jim, munching on his popcorn.

“It sure as hell isn‘t based on reality if that‘s what you‘re wondering,” added McCoy. “At least, that what I‘ve heard.”

“Bones, don‘t tell me you haven‘t see it before?” exclaimed Jim, staring at his friend in surprise. “How in the hell did you get to be your age without ever seeing the Princess Bride?”

“Alright,” said McCoy, crossing his arms and scowling. “I won‘t tell you.”

Jim threw a popcorn kernel at his head but missed when McCoy ducked. McCoy narrowed his eyes and reached under his chair to pull out the tub that held the buttered popcorn. Jim’s eyes widened, he hadn’t expected Bones to have gotten himself popcorn too!

McCoy pulled off the lid and grabbed a kernel to toss back at Jim.

Jim grinned and caught it in his mouth. He smugly chewed it as Bones swore at him.

Spock watched their antics with a raised eyebrow. His faintly disapproving air made Jim and Bones grin at each other before they both each tossed a kernel at Spock.

The boy looked scandalized as the popcorn landed in his hair.

Jim laughed hard. “Sorry, Spock. We couldn’t resist.”

“Such actions are a waste of sustenance and are therefore illogical,” said Spock as primly picked the kernels out of his hair. Then he looked mildly uncertain as to what to do about them. He certainly wasn’t going to eat them.

McCoy convinced him to pass them over and he put them into one of his empty cup holders for later disposal. Jim thought that there had been nothing wrong with tossing them onto the deck. There were already enough kernels on the floor to give the sanitation crews of the Maintenance Department reason to grumble.

Spock had firmly disagreed.

The lights of the rec room slowly dimmed as the first scene opened up, showing a small boy sitting in bed in front of a television screen, playing a very old video game, the sort that was heavily with pixels and clashing colors.

“That is the Earth game of baseball,” said Spock, in observation.

Both Jim and McCoy looked at him in surprise.

“You know baseball?” asked Jim, with raised eyebrows. He hadn’t pegged Spock as the sort to care about human sports, little kid or not.

“My mother has a fondness for the game,” answered Spock, making a note in his PADD.

Well, that explained it. Jim blinked and asked, feeling rather curious to know the answer, “Huh, what do you think of it?”

“It is adequate for a physical sport,” said Spock. “Though somewhat simplistic.”

Jim grinned, not at all surprised by Spock’s opinion of the game. Spock considered chess to be a worthy sport, not baseball.

On screen, the boy had jumped back into bed and his mother had walked into his bedroom. She told him that his grandfather was there. The boy wasn’t happy about the news. Then the grandfather walked in. The grandfather had pulled out a wrapped item, telling his young grandson that he had a gift for him. When the boy opened it, the grandfather explained how the book had been read to him, then he in turn had read it to his son and now, he was going to read it to his grandson.

Spock paused in the midst of his notes to lilt his head. “Is it standard among human families for there to be such traditions?”

“It depends on the families,” said McCoy, thoughtfully. “But yeah, my father would buy me ice cream whenever I got a sore throat and I do the same with my girl.”

“My mom would tack mistletoe onto doorways on Valentine’s Day,” said Jim softly. “She told me that my dad did it with her.”

Spock nodded and went back to watching the screen while McCoy shot Jim a concerned look over his head.

Jim just shook his head. He knew what was setting off Bones' worry. He usually never talked about his family, not even when he was drunk. He didn’t like sharing. When he did, the only one that heard about it was Bones. Jim couldn’t remember any instance where he’d talked about his own family with Spock.

Maybe little kid Spock was just easier to tell this stuff to, thought Jim.

Back on screen the grandfather was reading from the book. The scene switched from the boy’s bedroom to rolling green fields.

“A narrative within a narrative,” said Spock, his tone rather intrigued. “An interesting and unusual format to chose.”

Then Buttercup was telling Westley she wanted her horse’s saddle polished until she could see her face in it. The farm boy responded with the famous line of ‘as you wish’. The grandfather’s voice narrated that this was the only way that Westley ever responded to her orders.

The grandfather explained that Buttercup had realized that all this time when Westley was saying ‘as you wish’ he had really been saying, ‘I love you.’

“I do not understand,” said Spock, turning to Jim. “Would it not have been simpler for Westley to have informed the female about his regards without it being necessary for her to extrapolate the true meaning of his words?”

Jim nodded and answered, “Yeah, but even with among humans, it‘s kind of hard to talk about our feelings. Especially, when it‘s about really strong feelings, like love.”

“It is? I thought humans had no difficulty expressing their emotions,” said Spock, his brows furrowing a bit in puzzlement.

“Expressing? Sometimes. But actually telling someone who could reject your feelings?” said Jim. “That‘s one of the hardest things for a human to do.”

“You've got that right,” muttered McCoy, his own gaze on the screen where Buttercup was asking Westley to fetch her a pitcher that was within easy reach. The grandfather had just said that Buttercup had realized that she returned Westley’s love.

Jim nearly cracked up laughing as Spock’s small nose scrunched in disgust as the fictional pair began kissing. The movie seemed to agree, because the grandson was now complaining about being tricked and how the book had no sports and was instead a kissing book.

“I find myself in agreement,” said Spock, his nose still wrinkled. “Such displays are neither warranted nor required.”

Jim wasn’t able to fight off a chuckle. “Sorry, Spock, but it is required for the story. And it’s the sort of thing that’s going to happen a lot in human movies.”

“I thought that this was a film suitable for children,” said Spock, his tone petulant. “I do not consider that to be accurate.”

McCoy was smiling as Spock’s complaining tone nearly matched the one of the movie’s fictional boy.

On screen, Buttercup was hugging Westley goodbye for he was leaving in order to make enough money so that the young couple could marry. She explained how she was worried that something would happen to him. Westley calmly pointed out that what they had was true love, something that didn’t happen every day.

Spock paused in his note taking and stared at the movie in silent astonishment, then he turned to Jim. “I do not understand. Why would there be a difference between love and true love? What is the significance?”

Jim scratched his head feeling at loss as to how to explain when McCoy cut in.

“Well kid, that‘s the thing about humans in love, no matter how deeply it started sometimes the love just dies out,” McCoy explained softly, his tone bitter. “Humans fall out of love almost as easily as they fall into it. But true love?”

Spock watched McCoy with interest.

“True love is the ideal, the sort of love that never dies out. Never loses it‘s strength, no matter how long they know each other, they would still feel the same way about each other even on their deathbeds,” continued McCoy, his voice now softer.

“Most people don‘t find that kind of commitment,” added Jim, now being the one to give his friend a concerned look but Bones just ignored him. “And when they do they‘ll hold on to it with everything they‘ve got.”

On screen, the grandfather had just explained that Westley’s ship had been attacked by the Dread Pirate Roberts who never left captives alive. Then he said that when the news reached Buttercup, she shut herself up in her room for days on end without eating. Buttercup numbly declared that she would never love again.

“And when a they lose the person they love so deeply,” said Jim, softly. “It‘s the same as if they had died themselves.” He considered his own mother, who’d never lost that edge of grief about his father even decades later. And Jim wondered if they would still have been in love if the timeline had remained unchanged or would they too have fallen apart like so many other human couples. He rather hoped they’d stayed together. He knew that he could ask the other much older Spock from the alternative future but he was rather reluctant to hear the answer.

The movie scene shifted from Buttercup’s grief-numbed face to a town square which was filled to the brim with people. A blast of trumpets signaled Prince Humperdinck’s appearance. He gave a speech, which culminated in his declaration of choosing a common woman for his bride. The trumpets sounded again and Buttercup appeared, wearing a glittering dress and a blank expression.

“Did she not declare that she would not love again?” asked Spock, puzzled.

“Wait for it,” said Jim.

The grandfather explained that the prince had the right to chose whomever he wanted for a bride and had chosen her but Buttercup did not love Prince Humperdinck.

“That is consistent with the storyline,” said Spock with a nod. He added an observation to his PADD.

“I‘m just wondering why she agreed to it,” grumbled McCoy. “Look at her face! She doesn't want to be there. She should have told the prince to stuff it.”

That earned McCoy a puzzled look from Spock. “Stuff what?” asked the boy.

McCoy stared back at him.

Jim grinned at McCoy. “Yeah, Bones? Stuff what?” he asked innocently.

McCoy glared at him. “His mouth. Like telling him off.”

Spock’s small expression of puzzlement didn’t clear up but he shifted his gaze to Jim, clearly hoping that he would translate.

“What Bones is saying is that she should have declined and told him no,” said Jim with low laugh. He was amused that he had to explain not just the movie, but also Bones's words to the kid.

“I see,” said Spock. He wrote something down and shifted his gaze back to the screen where Buttercup was stopped in a forest during her daily horse ride by three men who asked her if there was village nearby. She replied that there was no village for miles. A threatening music started up as the shortest of the men told her than no one would hear her scream. Right before she could, the largest man of the trio reached up to her and with a squeeze to the back of her neck and rendered her unconscious.

“I was not aware that humans had a similar move to render a being unconscious as Vulcans,” said Spock with eyes a little wide.

“We don‘t,” said Jim, rubbing his own neck in silent sympathy to Buttercup’s situation. He knew how that felt.

“So it is just coincidence?” asked Spock, his tone shaded with interest.

“Yeah,” answered Jim.

“Most humans can‘t even learn that Vulcan voodoo move,” said McCoy. “There‘s no way that they knew it back then.”

“This film was made in the same century as the Wizard of Oz,” agreed Jim.

“The depth of human imagination is quite fascinating,” said Spock as he wrote in his PADD before turned back to the screen.

McCoy and Jim exchanged grins over his head.

On screen, Buttercup had been carried onto a sea ship while the shortest man of the three was explaining his actions and how he intended to cast suspicion of her kidnapping on the rival country of Florin - the country that Humperdinck ruled - in order to spark off a war. The biggest, tallest man was clearly not happy about having to kill Buttercup as he said that he did not think it was right to kill an innocent girl. This sparked the small man into a tirade where he insulted the big man about daring to use the word ‘think’.

Jim noticed that Spock’s mouth was turning down at the corners again.

“This is not pleasant teasing,” said Spock softly.

“No,” agreed Jim. “It‘s definitely bullying.”

The slim third man, who’d been silent this entire time finally spoke up. He voiced his agreement with the large man, now named as Fezzik. This triggered off another tirade from the short man as he yelled that it wasn’t any of his concern and how he had no call to question him as when he’d found him he’d been too drunk to order brandy. Then he turned and berated Fezzik again.

“Not possible,” muttered McCoy.

Jim grinned at him. “You only say that because you could still put in an order even in your sleep.”

McCoy just smirked.

The slim man had was quietly cheering up Fezzik by giving him a sentence and letting the large man come up with a rhyming line in return.

“Now,” said Jim in satisfaction and pointed at the screen where the two men were now smiling and clearly happier without Vizzini, “that’s friendship.”

Vizzini tried to shut them up, telling that not to rhyme ‘and I mean it!’, but Fezzik just kept rhyming by asking if anyone ‘wanted a peanut’ driving Vizzini to scream in frustration.

McCoy laughed.

The scene changed from day to night and revealed the ship to be on a large expanse of water. Vizzini questioned the slim and still unnamed man as to why he kept looking back. The slim man explained how he was checking to make sure that no one was following.

Jim grinned widely as Vizzini said his first inconceivable at such a situation occurring. Buttercup told Vizzini that he would hang for her kidnapping and he snapped back at her before he asked the unnamed man why he was still looking behind them.

Jim had to bite down on his lower lip as Vizzini declared his second inconceivable.

“Why would he consider such a situation to be inconceivable?” asked Spock, his eyebrows scrunching down. “While pursuit in order to rescue Buttercup is unlikely there could be another factor involved as to why they are being followed.”

“The movie will explain,” said Jim.

“You can not inform me?” asked Spock, with a raised eyebrow.

“Don‘t want to spoil it for you, Spock,” said Jim cheerfully.

Vizzini was staring incredulously at the ship that was following them. He tried to explain that it could just be a fisherman but he didn’t sound convinced. A splash sounded and Buttercup was shown trying to escape by swimming away. Vizzini ordered his men to get her, but the unnamed man said he did not swim. Fezzik said he only dog-paddled and made the paddling hand motions as evidence.

McCoy snorted in amusement.

Vizzini shouted to turn the ship and then a sound that could be described as a shrill growl sounded from the speakers. Vizzini asked Buttercup is she heard that, and how that was a noise made by the shrieking eels before they feasted on human flesh. Buttercup was shown looking desperately around as a large eel swam around and then right up to her.

Spock went tense and pale as the eel’s mouth opened to reveal sharp teeth as it shrieked at Buttercup.

The tribble, which had been silent for a lot of the movie, trilled in alarm and wiggled in its cup holder. As if in response to Spock’s and the tribble’s reaction, the scene cut back to the grandfather who promptly said that Buttercup wasn’t eaten in a reassuring voice.

Spock slowly relaxed though he still looked pale. Jim gave his arm a pat. Spock shot him a quickly hidden look of gratitude. Then he in turn petted that unhappy tribble until it calmed down.

McCoy was grinning at them as the grandfather explained how he had to explain because of how worried his grandson looked just then.

“Why would the boy not want to admit to the depth of his reaction to the story?” asked Spock. He turned to Jim. “It is clear he is deliberately attempting to downplay his own emotions. Why would he seek to do so?”

“Well, he‘s a boy,” said Jim.

Spock just blinked at him. “Why would his gender have any significance?”

“Because there‘s sort of cultural expectation especially during the century that the movie was produced that males had to act in a certain way,” answered Jim.

On screen, the grandfather was reading again, getting to the point where the eel was charging Buttercup when Fezzik hit the eel on the head with a big fist and reached into the water to pull her out.

“Yeah, they aren‘t suppose to be getting worried about fictional girls,” added McCoy. “Mind you, a lot of that nonsense isn‘t around anymore, but some of it still lingers.”

“Cultural expectation of gender-roles,” said Spock, turning his gazw back to the movie. “Fascinating.” He made more notes in his PADD.

Now Vizzini was pointing out that whomever was following them was too late for they had reached their destination, the Cliffs of Insanity.

“Such a name does not sound very auspicious,” said Spock. “Why would they head for such a location?”

“It‘s suppose to be funny,” said Jim. “Such crazy names are a homage to old style fantasy adventure stories.”

“It is a cultural reference?” asked Spock.

“Sort of,” said Jim. “But nothing specific. Sort of a general kind of reference.”

“I think that the movie produces are operating under an assumption that their audience - the sort of people who‘d watch this particular kind of movie - would get it,” added McCoy.

Spock nodded. “I understand.”

On the screen, Fezzik was carrying Buttercup, Vizzini, and his unnamed friend up the cliffs by using a rope. Below them, also climbing the rope was a man dressed completely in black, wearing a mask and with a sword strapped to his side.

Vizzini called the situation inconceivable then began to berate Fezzik, telling him to move faster. Fezzik pointed out that he was carrying an additional weight of three people while the man in black was only carrying himself.

“That is a logical observation,” said Spock, his tone shaded with approval then it became disapproving. “I do not believe that Vizzini‘s logic to be sound. He is being most illogical in his demands.”

They reached to top of the cliffs and Vizzini immediately began cutting the thick rope with a knife.

Spock breathed in sharply as he watched.

The music in the background grew urgent, higher pitched and rapid. The noise set off the tribble again, not setting down even when Spock petted it. He ended up having to pick the tribble and tuck it into the front large pocket of the black overalls before the critter switched over to purring.

Abruptly the music cut off with a low sound as the rope was cut through and its sliced end slid over edge of the cliff.

Spock’s eyes were wide again before he relaxed when the man in black was shown to be clinging to the cliff face.

Vizzini popped in between Fezzik and his friend that had been admiring the man in black’s arms and exclaimed how his survival was inconceivable. The unnamed man then asked him why he kept using that word, as ‘I do not think it means what you think it means.’

Jim laughed. McCoy also chuckled.

Spock stared at the screen then turned to them, looking from Jim to McCoy and back to Jim.

“The entire time, it was a deliberate build up to a humorous situation?” Spock asked, clearly surprised by the idea.

“Yup,” said Jim, grinning. “That‘s what I didn‘t want to tell you too early. It would ruin the joke.”

“Not a bad joke,” added McCoy. “So, that‘s where that line comes from. I never realized.”

Spock turned to him, “The line? Please, explain what you mean.”

“The line: I don‘t think it means what you think it means,” explained McCoy. “It‘s quoted a lot. Usually by people to other people who are using words wrong. Hell, even I‘ve used it.”

“You did not know the origin yet you still used the quote?” asked Spock, his eyebrows rising.

“It‘s culturally significant, Spock,” said Jim. “It‘s the same way that someone can use the quote, ‘we’re not in Kansas anymore’ whenever they end up in an unexpected situation without ever seeing the movie. It‘s part of human culture.”

“And the usage of such quotes are recognizable?” asked Spock.

“On average,” said Jim. “Not always of course. Not everyone knows the quotes and some are like Bones. They haven‘t seen the movie that is being referenced. But it‘s a pretty good chance that if one isn‘t recognized another would be. These movies are still pretty popular.”

On the screen, the unnamed man was trying to convince the man in black to let him help get him up the cliff faster. But since he’d just told him that he intended to kill him once he reached the top the man in black refused.

Spock’s note taking grew more rapid as the man came back asking the man in black if he’s accept his word as a Spaniard. He was rebuffed. Then the tone of the unnamed man became serious as he swore an oath on his father’s soul.

“Why would the man in black believe him when he did not believe his oath as a Spaniard?” asked Spock, as the man in black climbed the rope to the top.

“Because he swore on his father‘s soul,” said Jim.

Spock’s expression was blank with incomprehension.

“He‘s father was someone that he loved,” added McCoy, quietly. “He wouldn‘t say it if he didn‘t mean it.”

“And if he broke his promise it would be as if he was hurting his own father,” added Jim.

On screen, the man with the last name of Montoya asked the man in black if he had six fingers on his right hand. Then the explanation as to why he’d asked quickly followed.

Spock tilted his head in interest as he learned of the death of the man’s father, and how his scars had been given to him by the six-fingered man.

Jim mouthed his lines as the unnamed Spaniard finally named himself with the lines of ‘Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.’

Spock had seen him and now stared at Jim. “Another quote that is culturally significant?”

“Yeah,” said Jim. Not bothering to try to explain to the kid that it also had been personally significant to him when he’d been very young. He’d used to day dream about finding the person who’d been responsible for the attack on the Kelvin and saying ‘Hello, my name is James Tiberius Kirk. You killed my father. Prepare to die’, for quite a few years. He wasn’t going to explain that to Spock. It would just lead to Nero.

He was so lost in his own thoughts that he wasn’t brought out of them until the clashing sounds of metal swords coupled with high tension music sounded from the speakers.

On screen, Inigo had just called the man in black a better than himself swordsman before explaining that he was smiling because he wasn’t left handed. He switched the sword to his right hand and made the man in black backpedal.

“Is the sword fighting accurate in its portrayal?” asked Spock, as the man in black explained that he was also not left handed.

“I have no idea,” said Jim as he leaned forward in excitement of the fight.

“Doubt it,” said McCoy, chewing on some of his buttered popcorn. “This sort of flashy sword swinging is done mostly for show. Stage sword fighting, I think it‘s called.”

“We could ask Sulu,” said Jim, thoughtfully. “He‘s a fencer. He would know if it‘s at all realistic.”

Spock nodded in acceptance.

Inigo has just asked the man in black for his name but he was refused. Their fight went up a level in intensity, until it culminated in the man in black defeating him.

Spock went tense again as Inigo expected to be killed until the man in black explained that he would sooner destroy a stained glass window.

McCoy winced at the solid thunk which sounded from the speakers as Inigo was firmly hit on the head to knock him out.

“Why would he consider Inigo to be an artist?” asked Spock. “Is it purely from his combat skills?”

“Yeah,” said Jim. “He‘s pretty much agreeing that such level of skill shouldn‘t be destroy since it‘s a pretty rare talent.”

“Not that he would have cared if Inigo was a scumbag,” added McCoy.

Jim nodded in agreement. “That‘s true. Inigo also proved that he was a good guy when he let him have the chance to rest on top of the hills before beginning the fight. He didn‘t have to do that. He did the man in black a favor.”

“So, the favor was reciprocated,” observed Spock. He noted this in his PADD. “Do all human have such structured rules of behavior?”

McCoy and Jim exchanged startled looks.

“I wouldn‘t say structured rules,” said McCoy. “That‘s implying that they‘re written down somewhere and that‘s not true at all. It sure would have made life easier it was true.”

Jim laughed, “Not really.”

“That‘s because you would have broken every rule, and then set fire to the rule book,” grumbled McCoy. “Don‘t tell me you wouldn‘t. I saw what you did with that paper copy you replicated of all Starfleet regulations.”

Jim gave him an innocent look.

Too curious to resist, Spock asked McCoy. “What did Jim do to it?”

McCoy grinned. “He rewrote a good part of them, took it apart and then posted all the pages all over the Academy campus.” He gave Jim a look. “I don‘t think they ever figured out it was you.”

Jim tried not to turn red at the wide-eyed look that Spock was giving him.

“I only reworded the ones that didn‘t make sense,” Jim told him. Damn, Spock’s going to remember that when he’s all grown up again. He’s never going to let me forget it.

McCoy smirked at him. Jim tossed more popcorn at him.

Spock pointedly ignored them both as a popcorn battle broke out over his head and he set his eyes back onto the screen where the man in black was fighting Fezzik.

Jim tried to declare a cease-fire when he noticed that he had a disadvantage in his ammunition. His plain popcorn was easily getting brushed away while Bones’ buttered ammunition was leaving grease all over his hair and clothes.

I love butter, just not on me, Jim thought with a grimace.

McCoy just tossed more popcorn at him until he surrendered. Jim sulked into his tub as McCoy smugly ate his own popcorn. On screen, the man in black had managed to defeat Fezzik by holding onto his neck until he passed out.

Then Jim noticed that Spock was eying Jim out of the corner of his eyes and his mouth was twitching up.

Jim grinned in delight. It was always so much fun to see Spock trying to fight off a smile.

The movie was now showing Prince Humperdinck as he went over the area where Inigo and the man in black had held their fight, reading the fight right but not the motivation behind it. The scene switched back to the man in black as he approached Vizzini who was sitting down and holding knife to a blind-folded Buttercup.

Spock’s eyebrow went up as Vizzini declared the great thinkers of humanity like Aristotle and Socrates to be nothing but morons when compared to himself.

“I do not believe that to be accurate,” said Spock, dryly. He clearly remembered Vizzini’s misuse of the word inconceivable.

His tone made Jim crack up with laughter as McCoy snorted in amusement.

The man in black challenged Vizzini to a battle of wits, which he agreed if it was to the death.

“Why would he add such a codicil?” asked Spock. “To the death is needlessly excessive.”

“Because he‘s a moron,” said McCoy. “He thinks there‘s no chance he‘s going to lose.”

Jim nodded his agreement.

“Such hubris is most unbecoming,” said Spock, with a disdainful tone in his voice.

“Which is kind of the point,” explained Jim, amused at the muted glare that Spock was directing at the screen. “The audience isn‘t suppose to like him at all. Even without knowing the motivations of the man in black, we‘re suppose to be cheering him on to take down Vizzini.”

A look of understanding swept across Spock’s face. “Fascinating. I had not considered such a motivation.” He promptly wrote this in his PADD. Then his attention back to the screen where the man in black had just set both goblets full of wine back after adding iocane poison.

The man in black explained that the battle of wits involved Vizzini finding out the location of the poison, and once he pointed it out they would then drink.

Spock’s small scrunched nose up in barely concealed disgust as Vizzini reasoned out as to which goblet to chose.

“He is not only illogical but also circular and convoluted in his thinking,” complained Spock, his tone displeased. “The test was the location of the poison which yields only four outcomes. In either goblet such as the one closest to Vizzini or the furthest from him, in both goblets or in neither.”

Jim shot him an impressed look. He’d certainly hadn’t thought that out the first time he’d seen the movie.

Even as a kid, Spock’s good, thought Jim, feeling rather proud of him.

McCoy shot Spock an interested look. “You don‘t think that trying to find out what kind of man the man in black is, matters? At all?”

“Such data is only partially necessary to make an accurate assessment,” said Spock, frowning at the screen where Vizzini’s had distracted the man in black to look away. “Even then the information upon which he is relying to predict the location of the poison is incomplete. He can not know the true personality of the man. He does not even know his name therefore his ability to accurately chose the location of the poison by such a method is inherently flawed.”

As if to prove his point, the man in black told Vizzini that he had guessed wrong. Vizzini’s raucous laughter made Spock wince until Vizzini abruptly stopped laughing and fell over and out of the view of the screen.

Jim expected Spock to react to the death but he only continued to type on his PADD as the man in black explained to Buttercup that both of the goblets had been poisoned but he’d built up an immunity to it.

“Ha!” said McCoy. “That‘s clever. Here I was thinking that he‘d be carrying around the antidote since he also has the poison but building up an immunity is better.”

“How so, Doctor McCoy?” asked Spock, turning to him.

“Well, because with an antidote there’s always the risk that he won’t get to it in time or may he wouldn’t have it on him when it matters,” said McCoy. “Look how quickly it affected Vizzini, at least with a resistance he‘ll always carry that around.”

“And it‘s safer in case someone else uses the poison against him,” added Jim. “He did say it was pretty much undetectable.”

“A logical solution if he is facing such danger,” agreed Spock. “Vizzini failed to take such a possibility into consideration.”

“His own pride blinded him,” said Jim, with a nod.

On screen, the man in black was sneering at Buttercup, mocking the value of the word of a woman.

“I‘m glad no women are in the room right now,” muttered McCoy.

Jim laughed. “He‘s got his reason for his distrust. Wait for it.”

Buttercup told the man in black that Prince Humperdinck was incredibly skilled at hunting and would find them. She then denied that the prince was her dearest love when the man in black called him that. The man accused her of not being capable of love and she retorted in anger that she’d loved more deeply than a killer like him could dream of.

Spock’s stiffened in his seat as the man in black raised his hand to hit Buttercup, and nearly slumped in relief as the man stopped himself.

“He is taking her words rather personally,” said Spock, his voice shaken the implication of such violence against an unarmed woman. “If he was truly so impersonal to her then he would not have reacted so emotionally.”

“Wait for it,” said Jim, leaning forward in his seat.

McCoy rolled his eyes but also watched the movie with interest.

Prince Humperdinck has just found Vizzini’s body and was sniffing a tube. He declared it to be iocane powder.

Spock blinked. “How could he be certain?”

“I think it‘s suppose to be a joke,” said Jim. “Considering how much of a fuss they made about the poison in the goblet scene, that it‘s undetectable, and then he figures it out in seconds.”

“Not a very good joke,” said McCoy, dryly. “Well, you win some, you lose some.”

Spock looked at him with a raised eyebrow. “What does that phrase signify?”

“He means that the jokes aren‘t always going to be funny or appeal to everyone,” explained Jim. “Humans vary with what they find to be funny.”

“I had not considered that human humor had such level of complexity,” admitted Spock.

“I’d hardly call slap-stick, complex,” said McCoy with a chuckle.

Now Buttercup was naming the man in black as the Dread Pirate Roberts and the man acknowledged the name with a bow. Buttercup’s declaration of wishing him to be cut into a thousand pieces made Spock pause in his writing.

“It this further hyperbole?” he asked, with mild uncertainty in his tone.

“No, I think she pretty much means it,” said Jim. He was amused when his answer made Spock blink rapidly.

Buttercup’s vitriol was explained as she accused the Dread Pirate Roberts of killing the poor farm boy that she loved. The pirate mocked her that he couldn’t make exceptions when it came to killing captives. When he finally admitted that he did recall a farm boy that had spoken of her beauty and faithfulness, he sparked her anger to even greater levels by telling her that she should be glad that he killed him before the farm boy learned of her true nature.

Buttercups shouted declaration that she had died that day before she then pushed the pirate down the steep hillside made Spock stare.

Then the pirate called out ‘as you wish’ as he rolled down the hill.

Spock’s gasp was nearly inaudible over the sound of the movie but Jim had been paying especially close attention.

“He was not dead,” said Spock, sounding stunned. His brows scrunched up as he thought furiously. “Oh, at no point in the narrative is it ever specifically said that Westley had been killed. At most they said that the Dread Pirate Roberts didn‘t leave prisoners alive but that is not the same as being informed-”

McCoy interrupted Spock’s thoughts with a laugh as Buttercup threw herself down the hill after Westley.

Spock stared again. “Such actions were not necessary.”

Jim’s mouth twitched at the stunned tone in Spock’s voice.

“It would have been more prudent to find a safer path down,” continued Spock, his tone more disapproving than usual.

“Sorry, Spock,” said Jim, unable to hold in his laughter between Spock’s complaint and the long sequence interposed with ‘ow’s from Buttercup and Westley as they rolled down the hill. “More human humor.”

Spock raised an eyebrow, as if the question the sanity of a species that found two people rolling down hill to be a humorous situation.

“Spock’s right. Damn fools are lucky they didn‘t break their necks,” said McCoy, as he crossed his arms and scowled at the movie screen.

Jim stared at McCoy. “You agree with Spock? Oh, I have got to mark down this day. I don‘t suppose you could repeat that into a computer? For evidence when people don‘t believe me?”

McCoy glared at Jim then said flatly, “No.”

Westley was now explain to Buttercup how even death could not stop true love and how it could only be delayed for a while.

“That is illogical,” said Spock.

“It‘s just another example of how much true love is valued,” explained Jim. “That it can be stronger than death is a very appealing thought.”

Spock gave him a baffled look and then his nose scrunched up as Buttercup and Westley kissed each other for the first time in five years.

“Come on, Spock. Kissing isn‘t that bad,” teased Jim. “Don‘t you know anyone that you want to kiss?”

The wide-eyed startled look that Spock threw him made Jim sit up in his chair, but the dark flush of green that rose in the boy’s cheeks made Jim get over his surprise and nearly crow with delight.

There is someone! thought Jim in triumph. And he wondered what it would take to get Spock to confess a name.

McCoy was also looking at the small Vulcan boy with a mix of curiosity and fascination.

Spock pointedly refused to meet their gazes and kept his eyes firmly on the movie.

TBC in [Part Twelve]

a/n: Argh! Why must you be so awesome Princess Bride?! I want to cover every word, which is why this chapter ran to longer than usual. *shakes tiny fist at the win* =D