establish your womanhood with actions
establish your womanhood with actions. gossip girl. blair/chuck. 631 words. pg. In which Blair learns what Peter Pan never could: how to grow up.
Blair decides to become her own person before she becomes anyone else’s again.
-
The rest of the year passes by in a blur - exams and a 4.0 GPA and papers and holding a key close to her heart.
(At least that’s what she lets herself remember, she chooses to forget certain things like Daniel Humphrey’s hand on the small of her back during Christmas Break and that first heart shattering time Chuck didn’t look at her first when he walked into the room.)
She sees Chuck often, there’s now way avoiding him, and she doesn’t think she wants to.
“I need your help,” he asks her once, in the spring. He needs to take down a competitor, something about hookers and cocaine predictably enough.
Her skin practically itches at the want of it, and his lips are right next to her ear and she wonders if he can hear her heart race.
“I’m sorry, but I can’t.” and then she turns around and leaves.
-
Junior year, the thought of being around Chuck makes her twitchy.
She studies abroad in Florence.
-
There’s a brief run-in at the bar.
“Of all the gin joints….” he drawls lazily and Blair’s heart leaps into her throat.
“Hardly your most creative come-on.”
“Who says I’m trying?”
An unladylike snort comes out and she covers her mouth immediately after.
He stalks toward her and leans against the bar.
“I hear you’re planning on leaving us for a year.”
He picks his words carefully, speaks slowly and meticulously and the sound of his voice near breaks her heart.
“I hope you have fun,” and she touches his shoulder before he leaves.
She’s not sure if she wishes he’d ask her to stay.
-
There are boys in Florence: Roberto from down the street, Antonio from Roma, Matt from Texas who’s studying art. She learns how to cook pasta with cream based sauces and sometimes she forgets to make salad. One day, she eats an entire gelato con vaniglia and she puts on a dress and goes out afterwards. Days are spent in museums, staring at paintings and debating with Prof. Mosciatti over the meaning behind the placement of two angels. It's different, but it works.
-
Serena visits once, and between dalliances with waiters she leans in close with a death grip on her glass of white wine.
“B, we need you in New York.”
The urgency behind the words makes Blair almost snap to, the prosciutto with melon at her table all but forgotten.
“Of course you do,” Blair replies with an air of confidence, “Does Nate even know where his classes are?”
Serena laughs without sounding amused, and takes another sip before continuing.
“No, we all need you.”
The implication hangs in the air between them and Blair quickly takes a bite out of the appetizer on the table.
“This is so good, S,” she mumbles through a mouthful of melon and Serena smiles sadly at her.
-
She leaves with an entire wardrobe of Salvatore Ferragamo, Prada, and Nina Ricci. Chuck is waiting for her when she gets home.
“Italy looks good on you, Blair.”
Blair doesn’t miss a beat.
“Of course it does.”
-
Senior year is tough; being around Chuck isn’t as tough on her heart anymore.
She moves into a new apartment with Serena; Chuck and Nate come over for dinner once a week and always bring fantastic wine. Nate and Serena are doing dishes in the kitchen, and Blair can hear their laughter from the dining room. It puts a smile on her face. Chuck sets a hand on top of hers, gently, and she unconsciously leans in towards him.
Growing up has its advantages.
Blair decides to become her own person before she becomes anyone else’s again.
-
The rest of the year passes by in a blur - exams and a 4.0 GPA and papers and holding a key close to her heart.
(At least that’s what she lets herself remember, she chooses to forget certain things like Daniel Humphrey’s hand on the small of her back during Christmas Break and that first heart shattering time Chuck didn’t look at her first when he walked into the room.)
She sees Chuck often, there’s now way avoiding him, and she doesn’t think she wants to.
“I need your help,” he asks her once, in the spring. He needs to take down a competitor, something about hookers and cocaine predictably enough.
Her skin practically itches at the want of it, and his lips are right next to her ear and she wonders if he can hear her heart race.
“I’m sorry, but I can’t.” and then she turns around and leaves.
-
Junior year, the thought of being around Chuck makes her twitchy.
She studies abroad in Florence.
-
There’s a brief run-in at the bar.
“Of all the gin joints….” he drawls lazily and Blair’s heart leaps into her throat.
“Hardly your most creative come-on.”
“Who says I’m trying?”
An unladylike snort comes out and she covers her mouth immediately after.
He stalks toward her and leans against the bar.
“I hear you’re planning on leaving us for a year.”
He picks his words carefully, speaks slowly and meticulously and the sound of his voice near breaks her heart.
“I hope you have fun,” and she touches his shoulder before he leaves.
She’s not sure if she wishes he’d ask her to stay.
-
There are boys in Florence: Roberto from down the street, Antonio from Roma, Matt from Texas who’s studying art. She learns how to cook pasta with cream based sauces and sometimes she forgets to make salad. One day, she eats an entire gelato con vaniglia and she puts on a dress and goes out afterwards. Days are spent in museums, staring at paintings and debating with Prof. Mosciatti over the meaning behind the placement of two angels. It's different, but it works.
-
Serena visits once, and between dalliances with waiters she leans in close with a death grip on her glass of white wine.
“B, we need you in New York.”
The urgency behind the words makes Blair almost snap to, the prosciutto with melon at her table all but forgotten.
“Of course you do,” Blair replies with an air of confidence, “Does Nate even know where his classes are?”
Serena laughs without sounding amused, and takes another sip before continuing.
“No, we all need you.”
The implication hangs in the air between them and Blair quickly takes a bite out of the appetizer on the table.
“This is so good, S,” she mumbles through a mouthful of melon and Serena smiles sadly at her.
-
She leaves with an entire wardrobe of Salvatore Ferragamo, Prada, and Nina Ricci. Chuck is waiting for her when she gets home.
“Italy looks good on you, Blair.”
Blair doesn’t miss a beat.
“Of course it does.”
-
Senior year is tough; being around Chuck isn’t as tough on her heart anymore.
She moves into a new apartment with Serena; Chuck and Nate come over for dinner once a week and always bring fantastic wine. Nate and Serena are doing dishes in the kitchen, and Blair can hear their laughter from the dining room. It puts a smile on her face. Chuck sets a hand on top of hers, gently, and she unconsciously leans in towards him.
Growing up has its advantages.