Descriptions

[m_danson]

I'm interested in finding out about is analogies that people use to describe how relationships work. They are many and varied. Put engineers in a room and analogies turn to control systems, programming, and structures. MarriageBuilders uses "love banks" with deposits and withdrawls. Natural disasters and war show up when things are particularly bad

Comments

[suitablyemoname]

I tend to think that relationships defy generalized modelling and analysis. The closest one can get is "it's give and take", which isn't really saying anything at all. (Breathing is give and take.)

We might be able to model and analyze specific relationships, but I tend to get very uncomfortable very quickly when people begin talking about generalized analyses. Relationships do and don't work for any number of confused and unclear reasons, and in practice there seems to be very little but good and bad luck in between.

[suitablyemoname]

Then again, I'm an existentialist, so "IT'S ALL RANDOM AND ABSURD" is a fairly typical response. :P

[m_danson]

The closest one can get is "it's give and take", which isn't really saying anything at all. (Breathing is give and take.)

Thanks.

I agree with you that a single unified theory of relationships is not even close to likely. However, I disagree with you that the only possible way to model relationships is single specific relationships.

[m_danson]

Thanks. Me too. Tacit has had a few interesting descriptions on his blog and website.

[serious_mccoy]

Basically that a good relationship is a good friendship with agreed upon benefits and status, I guess.

But as has already been stated, sort of impossible to accurately generalize this kind of thing as a whole.

[m_danson]

Thanks.

I'm not looking for a single unified theory of relationships. I'm looking for the way people describe them.

[wetdryvac]

Relationships are contractual negotiations of trade where, in many cases, no party involved has more than a nebulous understanding of what their desires are, what their traded commodities are, and what value is assigned by any party to the trade to specific items

[m_danson]

*grin* Tribbles... I like it. Very visual.

The negotiation and contract law example is what I use most often. I find it very useful for explaining how I think things should work but less useful for explaining the warm gushy bits that can turn into biting poisonous bits.

[night_princess]

My first reaction to the question was this: http://theroselyrics.com/
Plants and gardens seem to be common metaphors for relationships. For example, relationships can "blossom", "grow", or "wither and die". Some require a lot of work to bear fruit, others volunteer, while still others can become invasive.

[m_danson]

Ha. The last time I heard that song I was in elementary school. The choir director loved it.

Thanks. I'd forgotten about that one.

metaphor for relationships

[vikingcello]

Right you are. The relationship itself can be seen as the plant. Both people in the relationship must contribute to the growth of the plant by supplying it with necessities. But, even with their best efforts, external conditions beyond their control could still damage the health of the plant.