The Shadows We Bear [Part V / ???]
Basic premise for those who do not know: this fic is set the the world of theskytides, an AU panfandom RPG set in a steampunk line in which it is totally a fandom of its own. Miles Edgeworth (from the Ace Attorney series) and Hijikata Toshirou (from Gintama) happen to be the first mate / boatswain respectively in of one of the ships in the game. In this story, Hijikata has something of a... crush towards Edgeworth that he has never told anyone, though he is aware. Which of course, will only lead to nothing but trouble...
Parts: Part I | Part II | Part III | Part IV | Part V | Part VI | Part VII | Part VIII | Part IX | Part X | Part XI
THE SHADOWS WE BEAR
TST!Shadowverse fic : Part V
It was a bit like a dream-perhaps it could have been a dream, with the way the fog around them seemed to be swirling around mindlessly and enshrouding the edges of his vision. But the fatigue he felt within him was very real, and the sword that was tightly grasped in his hand was also very real, and the events of the last week and then some were also as real as they could be. And the person before him was also very, very real.
“E-Edgeworth?” Hijikata breathed out, his voice echoing quietly within the space of the large cabin that he had stepped inside. He cautiously walked from his place towards the figure, loosening the grip he had on his sword as his own guard lowered; finally after all these days of constant worry and fear the idiot was still alright-
Then the figure turned around to face him, and the boatswain froze in his steps as his blood turned cold.
The figure before him was Edgeworth, but... it also wasn’t at the same time. Gone was the uniform that bore the crest and pride of the Ivonian Navy-instead now he was wearing a rather flamboyant pirate costume complete with a fancy jacket and pants (which looked notably tight) and surprisingly lacked a cravat, though the shirt it was wearing was unbuttoned at the top. It wasn’t very obvious from where he was, but the man could see that the clothes looked rather... messed up-there were some stains on as well as cuts and tears into the cloth that seemed somewhat out-of-place. He also wore one of those fancy pirate hats (complete with feather), and instead of the sword he always had around now what was on his side of his hip was a sheath for a sabre-something that a traditional pirate would be more inclined to use. Even the boots were off and its features were notably darker, as it light couldn’t reach it at all. But more than that, the real thing that had stunned Hijikata was the fact that instead of dark grey eyes, they now instead burned a toxic yellow within the musk and fog.
“You called~?” came the voice-it was like Edgeworth’s, but the tone was high and unpleasantly sharp. And if anything, it sounded a bit more like one of those low-voiced harpies.
“What the hell-” started the boatswain, this time taking a step back and tightening the grip of his blade once more.
The not-Edgeworth only took a moment to recognize who it was, eyes flaring for just a second before a hideous grin stretched across its face; a mockery of what should have been the real thing. “Oh, who do we have here now, hrmmmm?”
Despite himself, Hijikata only took another step back, feeling his insides clenching in a mix of disgust and shock and fear at what he was seeing now. “You’re not-You’re not Edgeworth.”
Then suddenly the face of the thing twisted into a look that the boatswain only knew all too well and he wasn’t sure of anything anymore. He knew that look there, knew it all-too well; it was the look Edgeworth had when there was triumph, the look that always crossed his face whenever they had accomplished something. It was a look that the dark-haired man had burned into his own memory, above everything else. It was a look that suited him, and not this... twisted, distorted version of who it was supposed to be.
That thought was enough to shake the man out from his daze and steel his own will. He shook his head to clear the haze in his mind and proceeded to snap into proper position, sword raised before him. “You’re not Edgeworth,” he hissed, dark blue eyes narrowing. That thing wasn’t Edgeworth at all... and whatever it was, he’d just beat it down and move on from here. He needed to find Seta and the other kid and then he could-
His thoughts were cut short then when the thing laughed again-it was a deep, rich laugh, rumbling in its chest and sounding like velvet and silk to Hijikata’s ears. The boatswain only held his ground, biting down on one side of his lower lip as he felt a bead of sweat rolling down from his temple.
“I’m not Edgeworth?” the thing went, the tone of its voice sounding more amused rather than hurt-in fact, it sounded far too amused for his taste. “But you know, Hijikata-” How the hell did it know his name? “-I AM Edgeworth. And more than that, I’m so much more than I have ever been.”
To his credit, the swordsman managed to not look very outwardly affected by that voice and those words. His eyes narrowed even further and he shifted just slightly forward. “Where the hell is Edgeworth. The real Edgeworth.”
The thing didn’t seem pleased when he voiced out that question, and it only showed all-too obviously on its face. It frowned, silver brows knitting within the shadows of his fringe and looked very much more like a child that had been deprived of his fun, and when it spoke it only seemed as it had just swallowed down something particularly bitter to the taste. “What makes you think I’m not the real Edgeworth?” it went, tilting its head as its yellow eyes only smouldered eerily within the fog. “Didn’t I just say it a minute ago? I AM Edgeworth... so much more than I have allowed myself to be than ever before.”
Then there was a pause, and when the thing spoke again it was no longer the warped, twisted voice that it had been speaking with before-it was the voice that Hijikata knew. Edgeworth’s voice.
“This is me, Hijikata. Just a part that nobody has ever seen before-besides you now, that is,” it then smirked, but it wasn’t the kind of smirk that the boatswain was used to-there was a feeling of something wrong in that smirk. Something that was simply off that churned in his gut and pinged him at all the wrong places. “Don’t you feel honoured at all?”
“...like hell I am,” the man responded as he gritted his teeth, continuing to stay in his place.
The thing then shook his head at that, the expression on his face seemingly looking more and more downcast. “Another one who doesn’t like me. Someone else who looks down on me... boo hoo, it’s all so sad.” Then it stopped again, this time in order to laugh aloud in its previous warped, distorted tone, and it continued for a good while before it finally died down. And when it did, a look of eerie calm could be seen across his face, only made worse as it assumed back to it former tone of voice while speaking. “But then again, why should they? I’m so pathetic and worthless, it won’t matter if I live or I die.”
What the hell-Hijikata started mentally once more as he jerked and snapped himself back properly in his head once more, but the thing only continued to speak.
“I’ve done nothing but been a disgrace to everyone. I’m imperfect, so utterly imperfect and no matter how I try I can never be someone like the Admiral. Not when he’s so perfect and I’m not at all. I’m only a burden to everyone. I’m so useless. I might as well die so that everyone can be happier without me.”
“T-That’s not true-” started the boatswain, only to quickly shut himself up as soon as he had uttered those words. Fuck, why was he slipping now? Didn’t he already make a vow to himself never to let his own personal feelings get in the way of whatever he did already? Especially at a moment like this, where so many things depended on him-and if he faltered even a little, it’d be the end for him. Still, that one moment of faltering was all that the thing needed, and the next thing that Hijikata knew was of him sending something behind him and spun around abruptly, drawing his sword out just in time to have it clash loudly against the blade of the other’s sabre.
Its yellow eyes narrowed through the gaps that their clashed swords made, the orbs flaring once yet again as it gave an impression of scrutinizing the other. “You know, he did always wonder just what was up with you. Always so loyal, so trustworthy, so strangely good to him in one way or another.”
The man only gritted his teeth and pushed harder on his side, letting the adrenaline run through his body in a bid to try and block out whatever it was that the thing was saying, no matter how many times it had hit the dot on him.
“-always so very very good to him even though he was worth nothing at all. It really does make one wonder, hrm? Perhaps maybe there’s a reason behind it, a reason you never told him but he was always wondering-”
“Shut up, just shut the fuck up!” snarled the boatswain in rage, and with a burst of strength managed to shove the thing away from him as he back stepped in order to put more distance between them. His hand was shaking slightly from the force that he had to use for the action earlier, and he only steadied it by holding it with his free hand so that it didn’t shake too much. He looked up, and only scowled even more when the thing only seemed so much more amused than it had ever been, yellow eyes only glowing within the dim lighting of the place.
“Oooh, what is with this sudden violence? Did I hit something inside there?” The smirk grew wider, and it did nothing but disgust the man. “Perhaps I said something right now?”
“You’re not him,” Hijikata hissed out, though a part of him now wasn’t too sure if it was for himself or for the thing.
At those words, the thing only scowled in a look of obvious distaste before it hissed out. “I already told you, Hijikata-I AM him. And if you still don’t believe it, I’ll prove it to you!”
Saying that, the blade of the sabre flashed in the artificial lights once more before the thing launched itself towards him, ready to strike. Hijikata barely had enough time to react, and just managed to raise his sword in time before they clashed aloud against each other, the sound akin to thunder that only echoed within the hollows of the place. Unlike before, there were no words from the boatswain, and he only pushed the other off him once more-but this time instead of backing off, he only lunged forward, sword in hand, as he went on a relentless attack on the thing in a bid to let the heat and moment of the battle simply wash out everything and anything it was talking about. But it was only a futile effort, as his ears heard every single thing that the thing was saying even as he pressed on with his attack.
“What’s with the sudden burst of energy?” it went, tone curious and light and if it wasn’t for the fact that it had been speaking with that voice, Hijikata might have been almost fooled. As it was, he could only grit his teeth again and rush forward with attacking.
“Did I really say something that hit you so much~?” That question came as it easily sidestepped a wild swing from the man, who just managed to dodge the almost-graceful attack that came his way back in return. The boatswain could feel himself running ragged with the energy he was pouring into his attacks-it was already bad enough that he wasn’t at his full power no thanks to his adventures on the floor above, and now with the fact that he was fighting someone... something like this was taking far too much out of him.
“You really should stop this, you know. Why try to stop something that you can’t change at all?”
Just shut the hell up! Hijikata roared out in his mind, snarling as he pressed on with his attack. The thing only dodged it once again and laughed that inhuman cackle it had before taking a step back in order to hide itself within the fog that was enshrouding him.
Now forced to pause, he barely managed to keep himself standing when he stopped even as he hunched slightly over from the exhaustion and panted softly. He glanced around the place while trying to catch his breath, scowling slightly. Why the hell were those two kids not here yet? Was this place so big that this one room couldn’t be found...? He knew that he couldn’t defeat the thing at all-not when he was so exhausted; only if they were here...
His thoughts were then cut short when he sensed his opponent behind him again, and Hijikata immediately spun around with his sword up once again; ready to block the next attack-
-then the eyes flared and everything promptly went downhill.
Parts: Part I | Part II | Part III | Part IV | Part V | Part VI | Part VII | Part VIII | Part IX | Part X | Part XI
THE SHADOWS WE BEAR
TST!Shadowverse fic : Part V
It was a bit like a dream-perhaps it could have been a dream, with the way the fog around them seemed to be swirling around mindlessly and enshrouding the edges of his vision. But the fatigue he felt within him was very real, and the sword that was tightly grasped in his hand was also very real, and the events of the last week and then some were also as real as they could be. And the person before him was also very, very real.
“E-Edgeworth?” Hijikata breathed out, his voice echoing quietly within the space of the large cabin that he had stepped inside. He cautiously walked from his place towards the figure, loosening the grip he had on his sword as his own guard lowered; finally after all these days of constant worry and fear the idiot was still alright-
Then the figure turned around to face him, and the boatswain froze in his steps as his blood turned cold.
The figure before him was Edgeworth, but... it also wasn’t at the same time. Gone was the uniform that bore the crest and pride of the Ivonian Navy-instead now he was wearing a rather flamboyant pirate costume complete with a fancy jacket and pants (which looked notably tight) and surprisingly lacked a cravat, though the shirt it was wearing was unbuttoned at the top. It wasn’t very obvious from where he was, but the man could see that the clothes looked rather... messed up-there were some stains on as well as cuts and tears into the cloth that seemed somewhat out-of-place. He also wore one of those fancy pirate hats (complete with feather), and instead of the sword he always had around now what was on his side of his hip was a sheath for a sabre-something that a traditional pirate would be more inclined to use. Even the boots were off and its features were notably darker, as it light couldn’t reach it at all. But more than that, the real thing that had stunned Hijikata was the fact that instead of dark grey eyes, they now instead burned a toxic yellow within the musk and fog.
“You called~?” came the voice-it was like Edgeworth’s, but the tone was high and unpleasantly sharp. And if anything, it sounded a bit more like one of those low-voiced harpies.
“What the hell-” started the boatswain, this time taking a step back and tightening the grip of his blade once more.
The not-Edgeworth only took a moment to recognize who it was, eyes flaring for just a second before a hideous grin stretched across its face; a mockery of what should have been the real thing. “Oh, who do we have here now, hrmmmm?”
Despite himself, Hijikata only took another step back, feeling his insides clenching in a mix of disgust and shock and fear at what he was seeing now. “You’re not-You’re not Edgeworth.”
Then suddenly the face of the thing twisted into a look that the boatswain only knew all too well and he wasn’t sure of anything anymore. He knew that look there, knew it all-too well; it was the look Edgeworth had when there was triumph, the look that always crossed his face whenever they had accomplished something. It was a look that the dark-haired man had burned into his own memory, above everything else. It was a look that suited him, and not this... twisted, distorted version of who it was supposed to be.
That thought was enough to shake the man out from his daze and steel his own will. He shook his head to clear the haze in his mind and proceeded to snap into proper position, sword raised before him. “You’re not Edgeworth,” he hissed, dark blue eyes narrowing. That thing wasn’t Edgeworth at all... and whatever it was, he’d just beat it down and move on from here. He needed to find Seta and the other kid and then he could-
His thoughts were cut short then when the thing laughed again-it was a deep, rich laugh, rumbling in its chest and sounding like velvet and silk to Hijikata’s ears. The boatswain only held his ground, biting down on one side of his lower lip as he felt a bead of sweat rolling down from his temple.
“I’m not Edgeworth?” the thing went, the tone of its voice sounding more amused rather than hurt-in fact, it sounded far too amused for his taste. “But you know, Hijikata-” How the hell did it know his name? “-I AM Edgeworth. And more than that, I’m so much more than I have ever been.”
To his credit, the swordsman managed to not look very outwardly affected by that voice and those words. His eyes narrowed even further and he shifted just slightly forward. “Where the hell is Edgeworth. The real Edgeworth.”
The thing didn’t seem pleased when he voiced out that question, and it only showed all-too obviously on its face. It frowned, silver brows knitting within the shadows of his fringe and looked very much more like a child that had been deprived of his fun, and when it spoke it only seemed as it had just swallowed down something particularly bitter to the taste. “What makes you think I’m not the real Edgeworth?” it went, tilting its head as its yellow eyes only smouldered eerily within the fog. “Didn’t I just say it a minute ago? I AM Edgeworth... so much more than I have allowed myself to be than ever before.”
Then there was a pause, and when the thing spoke again it was no longer the warped, twisted voice that it had been speaking with before-it was the voice that Hijikata knew. Edgeworth’s voice.
“This is me, Hijikata. Just a part that nobody has ever seen before-besides you now, that is,” it then smirked, but it wasn’t the kind of smirk that the boatswain was used to-there was a feeling of something wrong in that smirk. Something that was simply off that churned in his gut and pinged him at all the wrong places. “Don’t you feel honoured at all?”
“...like hell I am,” the man responded as he gritted his teeth, continuing to stay in his place.
The thing then shook his head at that, the expression on his face seemingly looking more and more downcast. “Another one who doesn’t like me. Someone else who looks down on me... boo hoo, it’s all so sad.” Then it stopped again, this time in order to laugh aloud in its previous warped, distorted tone, and it continued for a good while before it finally died down. And when it did, a look of eerie calm could be seen across his face, only made worse as it assumed back to it former tone of voice while speaking. “But then again, why should they? I’m so pathetic and worthless, it won’t matter if I live or I die.”
What the hell-Hijikata started mentally once more as he jerked and snapped himself back properly in his head once more, but the thing only continued to speak.
“I’ve done nothing but been a disgrace to everyone. I’m imperfect, so utterly imperfect and no matter how I try I can never be someone like the Admiral. Not when he’s so perfect and I’m not at all. I’m only a burden to everyone. I’m so useless. I might as well die so that everyone can be happier without me.”
“T-That’s not true-” started the boatswain, only to quickly shut himself up as soon as he had uttered those words. Fuck, why was he slipping now? Didn’t he already make a vow to himself never to let his own personal feelings get in the way of whatever he did already? Especially at a moment like this, where so many things depended on him-and if he faltered even a little, it’d be the end for him. Still, that one moment of faltering was all that the thing needed, and the next thing that Hijikata knew was of him sending something behind him and spun around abruptly, drawing his sword out just in time to have it clash loudly against the blade of the other’s sabre.
Its yellow eyes narrowed through the gaps that their clashed swords made, the orbs flaring once yet again as it gave an impression of scrutinizing the other. “You know, he did always wonder just what was up with you. Always so loyal, so trustworthy, so strangely good to him in one way or another.”
The man only gritted his teeth and pushed harder on his side, letting the adrenaline run through his body in a bid to try and block out whatever it was that the thing was saying, no matter how many times it had hit the dot on him.
“-always so very very good to him even though he was worth nothing at all. It really does make one wonder, hrm? Perhaps maybe there’s a reason behind it, a reason you never told him but he was always wondering-”
“Shut up, just shut the fuck up!” snarled the boatswain in rage, and with a burst of strength managed to shove the thing away from him as he back stepped in order to put more distance between them. His hand was shaking slightly from the force that he had to use for the action earlier, and he only steadied it by holding it with his free hand so that it didn’t shake too much. He looked up, and only scowled even more when the thing only seemed so much more amused than it had ever been, yellow eyes only glowing within the dim lighting of the place.
“Oooh, what is with this sudden violence? Did I hit something inside there?” The smirk grew wider, and it did nothing but disgust the man. “Perhaps I said something right now?”
“You’re not him,” Hijikata hissed out, though a part of him now wasn’t too sure if it was for himself or for the thing.
At those words, the thing only scowled in a look of obvious distaste before it hissed out. “I already told you, Hijikata-I AM him. And if you still don’t believe it, I’ll prove it to you!”
Saying that, the blade of the sabre flashed in the artificial lights once more before the thing launched itself towards him, ready to strike. Hijikata barely had enough time to react, and just managed to raise his sword in time before they clashed aloud against each other, the sound akin to thunder that only echoed within the hollows of the place. Unlike before, there were no words from the boatswain, and he only pushed the other off him once more-but this time instead of backing off, he only lunged forward, sword in hand, as he went on a relentless attack on the thing in a bid to let the heat and moment of the battle simply wash out everything and anything it was talking about. But it was only a futile effort, as his ears heard every single thing that the thing was saying even as he pressed on with his attack.
“What’s with the sudden burst of energy?” it went, tone curious and light and if it wasn’t for the fact that it had been speaking with that voice, Hijikata might have been almost fooled. As it was, he could only grit his teeth again and rush forward with attacking.
“Did I really say something that hit you so much~?” That question came as it easily sidestepped a wild swing from the man, who just managed to dodge the almost-graceful attack that came his way back in return. The boatswain could feel himself running ragged with the energy he was pouring into his attacks-it was already bad enough that he wasn’t at his full power no thanks to his adventures on the floor above, and now with the fact that he was fighting someone... something like this was taking far too much out of him.
“You really should stop this, you know. Why try to stop something that you can’t change at all?”
Just shut the hell up! Hijikata roared out in his mind, snarling as he pressed on with his attack. The thing only dodged it once again and laughed that inhuman cackle it had before taking a step back in order to hide itself within the fog that was enshrouding him.
Now forced to pause, he barely managed to keep himself standing when he stopped even as he hunched slightly over from the exhaustion and panted softly. He glanced around the place while trying to catch his breath, scowling slightly. Why the hell were those two kids not here yet? Was this place so big that this one room couldn’t be found...? He knew that he couldn’t defeat the thing at all-not when he was so exhausted; only if they were here...
His thoughts were then cut short when he sensed his opponent behind him again, and Hijikata immediately spun around with his sword up once again; ready to block the next attack-
-then the eyes flared and everything promptly went downhill.