My life seems completely hollow. All of the substance is missing. I feel like I'm just going through the motions, and I'm not even sure why I am bothering ( Read more... )

It's really pretty hard being a depressive sort of person, right now. Every source of information screams about how terrible things are, and how they're going to get worse. And seeing things like this terrible Presidential race, where both major party candidates are such horrible people, certainly reinforces that impression, that things are getting ( Read more... )

Everything I try to write here seems like fishing for sympathy or vagueblogging or some other crap like that. So apparently I'm unhappy with my ability to express myself, too. Go figure ( Read more... )

I am exceptionally tired of being sad and depressed and in pain all of the time.

This is not a suicide note. Just... tired and overwhelmed.

So, I wimped out on running in the cold, and went home to cook while Raven ran instead ( Read more... )

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Papers signed by the judge. It's all over now.

Divorce papers signed, and yet, somehow, it's still not over until the judge signs too. But I cannot help as feel that this was the true end, if the simple moment of us deciding to get a divorce was not.

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This heavy heart
Heart that I carry
Still holds the weight of you
And when I fall
As I always do
I'm crushed by the absence of you

It was not your fault but mine
and it was your heart on the line
I really fucked it up this time
didn't I, my dear?

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Both your eyes wide open
You see the shape I'm in
It wasn't my idea
That I be the one to sin
And so all those years together
Weren't worth a fucking dime
So go on and find me guilty
Just one more fucking time

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All our years together
Weren't worth a fucking dime
So go on and find me guilty
Just one more fucking time