*99.9% of the time, use the dialogue tag “said.” Don’t worry about repetitiousness-“said” is one of the words we, as readers, are trained to ignore. We don’t notice it, and that’s the point. We will, however, notice if your character “grumbled” and “mumbled” and “whispered” and “shrieked,” and so on and so forth. Dialogue tags other than “said” draw attention to themselves; they’re intrusive and should be avoided.
*Avoid euphuisms and flowery language. They’re silly and distracting. Say what you mean. Example: don’t say “orbs” when talking about eyes; just say “eyes.” (Actually, try not to talk about eyes, or the emotions contained therein. It’s become cliché.) Another example: don’t say “spear” or “rigid member” or “apple-eyed tickle-monster” or some-such when you really mean “cock.” For all our sakes, just say “cock.” The same applies to “pussy.”
OMG! I agree with these points SO MUCH! You. WIN AT LIFE.
"His turgid throbbing member entered her delicate pink flower, as she gazed into his steely orbs, swirling with suppressed lust."
Sorry, couldn't resist.
I hate it so much when authors use modifiers instead of a character's name. SERIOUSLY. SO MUCH HATE. Just use their damn name, and if it's too much, then weed it out during the editing process. Nobody thinks "the older man", or "the chestnut-haired girl".
And now I want to write a story with the title "God's in his heaven, all's right with the world" just because I think it's cool.
Naw, it's just an amalgamation of of every bad harlequin and crappy fanfic "lemon" that I've read. And I've been reading things for eight years (holy shit), so there's a ton of crap
( ... )
Firstly: I admire that you can slip a word like "amalgamation" into the conversation all smooth and casual-like, hehe! FTW!
Also, I think the life of a creative writing teacher is a rather downtrodden one. I actually wanted to be a creative writing professor until I realized that it entailed hours upon hours a week of ruthless assaults against the written word. Modifiers are the least of these people's problems.
OMG NICE IDEA! (How is it that, when you think of an SPN religious AU, your mind immediately creates a conceptually complex, introspective piece like that, and when I think of an SPN religious AU, my mind immediately says, "Priest!Dean self-flagellation w/ incest FTWWWWWW!"? I WANT TO BE DEEP, TOO. T_T ^_~)
The "Adult" rating is more of a small pet peeve of mine than anything, mostly because I don't think it's specific enough--it could mean "R" and it could mean "NC-17," both of which are very different.
It just makes things easier for me, as a reccer, if the story uses the same rating system I do so I don't have to define a rating for that story myself when I rec it. It's just a matter of personal taste, though. <333
I've never had/been a beta, so I don't know much about the process, but, hey, I'm willing to try! If you want me to look over a fic of yours, just drop me a line. <333
*Know the grammar rules, but do not feel constrained by them. They’re guidelines, more than anything-not unquestionable; not infallible. Do what’s best for your story.
Added note: This is only if you already know grammar rules. If you do not, you are not allowed to take liberty until you can string a sentence together. ;P
Also, apple-eyed tickle-monster? BWAHA. I am so putting that in my next fic: "Dean bent down and licked Sam's apple-eyed tickle-monster moistly." I think it'll go over well.
HELL to the YES about knowing grammar rules before you break them. I have some excruciating memories of stories in various creative writing classes that made me suspect they were written by elementary-school students (possibly ones unfamiliar with the English language).
One time, during the critiquing portion of a writing class, I commented on the massive amounts of spelling/grammar mistakes in a manuscript and its writer responded with, "Yes, I'm going to go back and change that later. This is just a rough draft."
He's lucky I didn't tell him, "Yes, I understand that it's still being developed, but perhaps you should have made sure it didn't look like it'd been written by a retarded monkey before you showed it to the class." A child having a seizure on a keyboard could have come up with something of higher quality than that
( ... )
Comments 26
*99.9% of the time, use the dialogue tag “said.” Don’t worry about repetitiousness-“said” is one of the words we, as readers, are trained to ignore. We don’t notice it, and that’s the point. We will, however, notice if your character “grumbled” and “mumbled” and “whispered” and “shrieked,” and so on and so forth. Dialogue tags other than “said” draw attention to themselves; they’re intrusive and should be avoided.
*Avoid euphuisms and flowery language. They’re silly and distracting. Say what you mean. Example: don’t say “orbs” when talking about eyes; just say “eyes.” (Actually, try not to talk about eyes, or the emotions contained therein. It’s become cliché.) Another example: don’t say “spear” or “rigid member” or “apple-eyed tickle-monster” or some-such when you really mean “cock.” For all our sakes, just say “cock.” The same applies to “pussy.”
OMG! I agree with these points SO MUCH! You. WIN AT LIFE.
Also.
PORN
♥
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YAY PORN!
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Sorry, couldn't resist.
I hate it so much when authors use modifiers instead of a character's name. SERIOUSLY. SO MUCH HATE. Just use their damn name, and if it's too much, then weed it out during the editing process. Nobody thinks "the older man", or "the chestnut-haired girl".
And now I want to write a story with the title "God's in his heaven, all's right with the world" just because I think it's cool.
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Yeah, the modifier thing is annoying. I used to do it sometimes, and now when I look back I'm, like, WTFSHORTERBOY! #facepalm# ^___~
OOOH WRITE IT. =o)
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Also, I think the life of a creative writing teacher is a rather downtrodden one. I actually wanted to be a creative writing professor until I realized that it entailed hours upon hours a week of ruthless assaults against the written word. Modifiers are the least of these people's problems.
OMG NICE IDEA! (How is it that, when you think of an SPN religious AU, your mind immediately creates a conceptually complex, introspective piece like that, and when I think of an SPN religious AU, my mind immediately says, "Priest!Dean self-flagellation w/ incest FTWWWWWW!"? I WANT TO BE DEEP, TOO. T_T ^_~)
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It just makes things easier for me, as a reccer, if the story uses the same rating system I do so I don't have to define a rating for that story myself when I rec it. It's just a matter of personal taste, though. <333
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I've never had/been a beta, so I don't know much about the process, but, hey, I'm willing to try! If you want me to look over a fic of yours, just drop me a line. <333
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Added note: This is only if you already know grammar rules. If you do not, you are not allowed to take liberty until you can string a sentence together. ;P
Also, apple-eyed tickle-monster? BWAHA. I am so putting that in my next fic: "Dean bent down and licked Sam's apple-eyed tickle-monster moistly." I think it'll go over well.
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One time, during the critiquing portion of a writing class, I commented on the massive amounts of spelling/grammar mistakes in a manuscript and its writer responded with, "Yes, I'm going to go back and change that later. This is just a rough draft."
He's lucky I didn't tell him, "Yes, I understand that it's still being developed, but perhaps you should have made sure it didn't look like it'd been written by a retarded monkey before you showed it to the class." A child having a seizure on a keyboard could have come up with something of higher quality than that ( ... )
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And now I'm curious as to what sunshine would taste like. *ponders*
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And sunshine tastes like Sam's peen, of course! And if you want to know what that tastes like, well, you're just going to have to ask Dean.
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