False Horizon

Sep 11, 2006 15:18

A 100-word drabble, inspired by a comment made by black_hound found here

False Horizon )

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Comments 8

black_hound September 11 2006, 20:16:18 UTC
Man. That last line.

Ya know, what's interesting about your drabbles? They are only 100 words, but they always always always feel like I've just read a whole bunch more. Certainly not just 100 words.

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idler_1814 September 12 2006, 15:51:38 UTC
Thanks so much for that! I suppose there are many philosophies for writing drables, but that's the one I prefer to try to follow: just how much can I convey in 100 words?

I'm delighted to know that sometimes it works.

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Horizon anglopollyanna September 11 2006, 20:42:17 UTC
This is almost poetry, and is, in fact, making me think of Flecker's lines:

West of these out to seas colder than the Hebrides I must go
Where the fleet of stars is anchored, and the young star-captains glow.

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Re: Horizon idler_1814 September 12 2006, 15:59:21 UTC
Ooo. The Dying Patriot. "Fire in the night" indeed. Eerily apt, don't you think?

Thank you!

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Re: Horizon anglopollyanna September 12 2006, 22:14:12 UTC
Eerily apt, don't you think? Yes! Amazing parallels, or, perhaps more accurately, the light and shade of the poem and drabble intertwining like chiaroscuro.

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whistlejacket September 24 2006, 21:21:35 UTC
I know I've said this before and I see someone else has said it here already as well, so I'm sorry to be unoriginal, but, your drabbles, I think, really are poems. The very sounds of the words evoke emotion; and your word-imagery is just so striking and profound. You're very good at this little genre. :-)

That last line is a killer, and I think that's Hornblower to the bone. Always eluded by the things---love, friendship, satisfaction---that really do bleong to him if only he was capable of knowing it. But this time it really is too late, and I think that's why he suffers so. This time he knows what he missed, and how he failed.

Another beauty, and another "review" from me that I think may be longer than the story!

:-) WJ

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sanguinity August 4 2018, 01:20:56 UTC
That's gorgeous.

Also, I somehow failed to notice how Hornblower never said a burial service for Bush -- did it get lost in Barbara's arrival and the rest? -- and now I have one more dissatisfaction about that novel to go with the rest.

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idler_1814 August 4 2018, 02:33:14 UTC
Oh, thank you! I'm glad you liked my little experiment in poetry.

Maybe we are to assume that the service was held for Bush, and all the rest of the men lost. CSF simply never mentioned it. Or perhaps, with no body, HH could not bring himself to think of Bush as gone.

CSF did, it seems. Porta Coeli...Heaven's Gate.

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