✩ 038

[howls_at_stars]

[This afternoon, Renji unearths a small pastry box from beneath a stack of forms he finally finished going through. The box has a note on it, dated yesterday, from Kira in thanks for the birthday gift. Upon opening the box, he finds half a dozen cookies that appear to be of a chocolate chip variety. Huh. Well wasn't that thoughtful

Comments

[VOICE]

[lyrical_penance]

[Calmly, the sound of shuffling papers can be heard in the background]

You're welcome, Abarai.

[VOICE]

[howls_at_stars]

*trying not to laugh STFU*

I am so gonna kick your scrawny ass--that was nasty, man!

[VOICE]

[lyrical_penance]

Oh, don't be dramatic. They're perfectly harmless. [more paper sounds as he tries not to laugh] Quite the, ah, delicacy in some places...

[VOICE]

[howls_at_stars]

I hear crow is a delicacy, too--you better get to eating some, you bastard. My revenge shall be swift and precise. Look forward to it.

[hair_macaroni]

You know, lover's quarrels are best privated. For future reference.

[howls_at_stars]

asdfiuytuokieyfoiuatefgyjakreg

...It's not a--what the hell, sir?

He fuckin' pranked me for April Fools'! I'm gonna fuckin' kill him.

[Filtered to Kuchiki-taichou]
Sir, I know you read a lot--you don't happen to have approximately 192,637,564,721,340,823 old newspapers lying around, do you? Slightly fewer would also be acceptable.

[Private to Renji]

[hair_macaroni]

...Ask your new eighth seat. He used a multitude to line the hellmoth cages.

[Private to Kuchiki-taichou]

[howls_at_stars]

Oho~ I will do that. Much obliged.

[the_rotator]

What did he do?

[howls_at_stars]

You don't want to know. It's an affront to sweet tooths everywhere.

[the_rotator]

Now I really want to know.

[howls_at_stars]

Picture if you will--a delicious plate of cookies. Now add insects encased in chocolate. The rest I leave to you. Think I'm'a go puke now.