Attired in standard faculty robes, Stephen Maturin stands behind a long table at the head of the potions classroom, waiting for the class to come to order. He is in no great hurry, but when one or two conversations trickle over into the silence that otherwise falls over the room, he gives the assembled students a look that raises a "shhh" from the
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While waiting for the others to show up, he noticed Miss Daae sitting alone, and smiled at her from across the room. Would that she were in his group as well - but then, you couldn't have everything.
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After giving it a few experimental scrapes against the nutmeg, he glanced up at Robin and said to him, "See, that shows how LITtle you know about wit! Wiiii~iiiit~~~ is something you can't just teach to someone. It's something you're born with. If you could just teach wit, just...hold a class in it...then I would've given lessons to Toby and all the other wet blankets from Corporate Ages ago. LEAdership, on the other hand...."
Suddenly seized by an idea, he slammed the grater and nutmeg onto the table, stood up, and started clapping his hands. "All right, team, gather round and listen up. Huddle, folks, c'mon, huddle, because I~~~ am going to teach you all a little something about LEAdership." Gesturing for his teammates to move closer to him, he continued, "In this Potions class, we~~~ are a team. And I~~~ am your fearless leader, your CAPtain. It's like...it's ( ... )
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Pushing the chopped-up mandrake root in Robin's direction, he added, "Mr. Goodfellow, it is your turn now, I believe." He had noticed Sarah passing notes to someone, but decided not to mention it - it was Stephen's place to impose discipline in his classroom, after all. (There was a double-entendre there, if he cared to pursue it, but on the whole he thought he would rather not.)
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All that to say that when Michael called him 'GAYfellow', Robin's expression got very dark. "Oh, that's amusing," he muttered to Sarah. "Millions of years and he's the first one to think of that. Really. Next he'll make some smart remark about what 'Puck' rhymes with." Sighing, he glanced at the new frog hopping away. "Any chance your ' ( ... )
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"Tool? What's that mean?" she asked in a whisper, quietly amused, and drew her wand. "And we don't need my accomplice, I could magically change his outfit to something more... flamboyant if I concentrated hard enough."
Which was pretty much impossible now as she looked up and caught sight of Stephen. Yeah, concentration went out the window at that. 'Must not stare at the professor. Must not stare at the professor. Should probably add stop thinking about the professor naked to this list. Oh, that's going to be impossible with him bending over to pick whatever that is up. Hell, I hope that isn't my frog or I am so much in trouble. I wonder if it could roll a quill over into the aisle and make him pick that up too? Is it time to go yet?Fortunately this distracted internal monologue meant she was not ( ... )
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This grating-nutmeg thing seemed pretty pointless (unlike paper!) - like Home Ec class or something, and Home Ec was totally for girls - but Michael realized it was something he could turn into an opportunity to further assert his leadership. "Yeeeeessssss, the nutmeg. You see, I~~~ am the nutmeg grater, and I need an asSIStant to the nutmeg grater. And seeing as Dwight~~...is not here yet - " Michael looked a bit forlorn for a moment " - one of you will have to fill in for him." After a brief pause, Michael mumbled, "I hope he doesn't think it's Saturday again."
Michael was so puffed up that he completely forgot his snakes-on-a-plane analogy, although he did answer Robin's query. "Noooo~oooo, you DIDn't get the right answer! You canNOT cut up your fearless leader. Who would tell all the ( ... )
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"A tool," he told Sarah, not bothering to keep his voice down, "is...well, it depends. In the thirteenth century, it was a penis. Now it means someone contemptible or idiotic." He looked at Michael, studying him as a child might study a particularly disgusting bug under a microscope (just moments before squishing it). "I think both definitions would fit in this case, don't you?"
As the mixture bubbled away happily, Robin turned his attention to Jack. "The Admiralty would be made of bigger fools than I thought to pass up such a man as yourself for promotion, my dear Captain. One only needs to look at you to imagine how you must raise the attention and morale of your men. I can't see how you wouldn't make a hard task seem sweet ( ... )
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