(no subject)
Scored clumsily, yet legibly, on pieces of card:
Professor Maturin,
I am a cat, and I need your assistance.
You may know Skimbleshanks, or Quaxo, or Mungojerrie? Well, due to a recent fight, I we desire a potion to turn us human for a bit. Since you're the Potions master at the school, we were wondering if you could make it. For us.
Please get back to me as soon as you can,
Rumpleteazer, Hufflepuff
Dear Agnes Nutter,
I am a female cat here and I need some sort of contraceptive. I heard on the grapevine you would be the person to talk to about it.
Please get back to me as soon as you can,
Rumpleteazer, Hufflepuff