(no subject)
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
Occasionally I enjoy Lancre blue cheese.
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
Carrottop and then Barney. Carrottop would go into the scorpion pit. I'd have Barney butchered and his remains sold to Dibbler distributed among the deserving poor.
3. What time is it where you are?
It is noon.
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
Severus Snape, he seems very intriguing. No one.
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark. I think I would call it Le petite mort. I could do a good job of bartending. I have good night vision and a certain expertise in mixing.
B. Gryffindor - Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
He should marry whoever he wants. I don’t really care. I understand they both are doing really well in business. So, he could live a very comfortable life.
C. Ravenclaw - You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.
Your desk is covered with paperwork because someone is trying to make you look lazy. Or you have inefficient clerks.
D. Hufflepuff - Prove you are not useless. I have ruled Ankh-Morkpork for twenty years surviving: Dragons, Numerous assassination attempts, blackmail and a coup. I have instituted many reforms and improvements to the city. Under my leadership it has become one of the Disc’s greatest cities. Also I’m pretty good at most board games and I can juggle.
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe. Do not threaten us rather than offering a bribe. A threat indicates you either don't really want to be here, or don't have enough sense to answer the question properly. The hat will automatically squib you, regardless of other votes, if you do. Well, I normally don’t use bribery to accomplish things. However, if I must I will offer the key to the city. Also a personal tour of the palace gardens. And a fine selection of my city’s multiethnic cuisine.