Open RP: at the department of forgotten wands

[callmewednesday]

An encounter with Albus Dumbledore in the hallway had turned Mr. Wednesday's thoughts to the vagaries of spring. Huginn and Muninn ranged as far as San Francisco, to alight upon the shoulder of a certain voluptuous lady. Dumbledore had been warbling Chaucer set to music: Whan that Aprille with his shoures sote / The droghte of March hath perced

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[vislor_turlough]

While Basher dug through the box looking for a wand that suited him, Turlough burst through the door, wanting to talk to Wednesday.

"How was that bastard's detention?" he asked.

[callmewednesday]

"Tiresome, as always," Wednesday answered Turlough. Basher Tarr's presence didn't inhibit the Ancient Runes professor from discussing another student's disciplinary status, apparently. "Detention doesn't teach him anything. Are you assigning it simply pro forma?"

[vislor_turlough]

"He turned me into a girl!" Turlough said in an outrage. "It was uncalled for!"

[callmewednesday]

Wednesday kept a straight face only by dint of extreme effort. "When I inquired as to the reason for this latest detention, he informed me it was given because you didn't want him to have any fun. Now it all becomes a bit clearer."

[ninja_lizzy]

Elizabeth still lacked a weapon, though she had now been in Hogwarts a few days. So, upon seeing the flyer Wednesday had posted--tacked onto a sandwich board being worn by a fellow student who was, in truth, wearing nothing else, Elizabeth inquired of this young lady where she might find the ancient runes class.

The cereal nymph was happily willing to oblige her with directions, and even walked part of the way with her, rhapsodizing on Mr. Wednesday's many fine qualities, which, thankfully, did not include his old man nipples.

Eventually, Elizabeth took her leave of the nymph and knocked lightly on the office door. "You said you had wands we could fondle?" she inquired when the door was open.

[callmewednesday]

Mr. Wednesday snorted at that remark. "You have no idea how that sounds, do you, m'dear? Yes, I have wands. No, you shouldn't fondle them, unless you want to give an old man some inappropriate ideas. Come in and have a look."

[ninja_lizzy]

Elizabeth laughed. "I do apologize," she said, reaching in among the wands in the box. "Such low-brow comedy is hardly worthy of a lady of good breeding, but I couldn't resist."

She eventually located a wand that felt... almost familliar... as if she'd used it before. Probably this was the wand her former self had used. She would take it anyway.

"I think this will do," she said with a smile. "I can just... take it then?"

[callmewednesday]

Wednesday cocked his head. "Oh, so you did intend the double entendre? My dear young lady, whatever would your female relatives say?" For he was certain she must have female relatives -- who better to shock with such utterances? "Yes, you may certainly take it. The wand, that is. The physical, material object known as a magic wand."

[sh1n1ng_arm0r]

Tony Stark sauntered into the classroom.

"Price, now, that's no object," he said without preamble, waving a flyer. "Convenience, that's something else again, because I have no clue about this whole wand situation. How do you even shop for a wand? Do you take it out for a test drive? Are there tech specs? Do they get upgrades? Do we have to work out a trade-in for a better model? Help me here, Teach."

[callmewednesday]

Wednesday raised an eyebrow, but the corner of his mouth (the left corner, to be exact) crept up a millimeter or so.

"Wandmaking is a mystical science," he said solemnly. "Some things cannot be quantified, however the modern mind may wish it otherwise."

He picked up the shoebox of wands and held it out to Stark.

"You can call me Mr. Wednesday, by the way. 'Teach' would require I held classes more often than I seem to do. I understand you choose wands by trial and error, mainly. See which one feels right to you, then ..." He shrugged. "The old 'swish and flick'."

[sh1n1ng_arm0r]

"Swish and flick - is that what the kids are calling it these days?" He took the offered shoebox and peered inside, then offered his other hand to shake. "Tony Stark. Good meeting you, Mr. Wednesday. How do ancient runes fit into a Hogwarts education exactly?"

[callmewednesday]

Wednesday shook hands most heartily. "Likewise, good meeting you, Mr. Stark. Ancient runes used to fit into a Hogwarts education more as a historical field than a modern one. I take a more practical approach to runology. The runes were devised well before the rise of planned obsolescence, you see."

[miranda_bnewski]

Miranda was just done with sorting and still hadn't changed, but she was too curious to find her room just yet. The notice on the door was fascinating, so she stuck her head in.
"Wands?" she asked. "What do they do?"

((I hope it's ok to assume there is a notice))

[callmewednesday]

(( Sure, that works! Since this is the Ancient Runes office, there'd also have been a plaque on the door reading "Ancient Runes" and another one reading "Mr. Wednesday", no doubt. So she'd know where she was. ))

Mr. Wednesday raised his head from the book he'd been reading. The face peering around his door was not a familiar one, but it wasn't completely unfamiliar, either. Hm.

"You're that new, are you? Tell me what you think a magic wand does."

[miranda_bnewski]

Miranda shrugged. "Turns pumpkins into coaches, maybe?"

[callmewednesday]

Wednesday chuckled. "That'd be an advanced bit of transfiguration. Come in, young lady, and have a seat. If you paid attention to the plaque on the door, you'll know who I am, but I haven't yet had the pleasure of knowing you."

Never mind that he could get her name from her without a word. It's the easiest thing in the world to know what people call themselves, he'd once told Shadow, and he hadn't been lying (that time).

[hungry_noteyes]

"Sounds useful," says a strange (and, to the trained eye, not quite human) young man wearing sunglasses, coming in. "What sorts do you have?"

(OOC: I've decided on a kind for him, but he doesn't actually have one yet.)

[callmewednesday]

"Call it an assortment," says Mr. Wednesday, glancing up. "The oak and the ash and the bonny ivy tree. Their cores are diverse and monstrous. Surprised you'd want one, I must say. Who set you onto us, nightmare?"

(( Dunno if you've read Wednesday's canon -- it's Gaiman's American Gods. Whether there's continuity between Gaimanverses or not, I'm thinking that Wednesday, as a god, will be able to recognize what the Corinthian is. Up to you whether the Corinthian recognizes who Wednesday really is -- and whether you want to be spoiled for it, if so; it's revealed pretty darn early on in the book, and wikipedia will give it away if you don't already know but want to. ;) ))

[hungry_noteyes]

"Someone here needs to be able to deal with overdoses of Dreamless Sleep and curses of Eternal Waking. And I was bored." Corinthian smiles slightly. "Immortality can be so boring, after a while. As you probably know--for though you are not of my world, I know one of the All-Fathers when I see one."

(I don't think I finished it, but--well, Wednesday? It's too easy.)

[callmewednesday]

(( Yeah, it isn't exactly made a secret -- the first time he shows up in the book, he proclaims that Wednesday is his day, and not all too long after that he comes right out with the not-so-sekrit identity. But some folks are very sensitive about spoilers, so I figured I'd ask. ))

"I thought we had a school nurse for those cases," counters Wednesday, his tone as pleasant as can be. "All the same, it's nice to hear you haven't been sicced on anyone in particular. Or am I mishearing you?"