Leave a comment

Comments 82

crossed_my_mind November 25 2007, 03:19:35 UTC
A very, very filthy man wearing psych ward pajamas made his way over to Molly and the fruitcake. He stared at the fruitcake. Then he stared at Molly. Back to staring at the fruitcake, then on to Molly's breasts, just to make everyone feel included.

"Has it come to get them?" he asked Molly's boobs, and pointing to the house elves.

Reply

schizowarrior November 25 2007, 03:27:51 UTC
...Wow. Wow. It had been a long, looong time since Molly had seen that type of pajama; it was kind of like being mugged in a dark corner of Memory Alley.

"Nah, they just ate some of this," she said, holding up a small cup of fruitcake. The talking-to-her-boobs-thing she could deal with easily; she'd experienced that for most of her adult life. "Ignore them, they're bit players anyway. You want some?"

Reply

crossed_my_mind November 25 2007, 03:31:31 UTC
The boobs certainly were not bit players, but that wasn't what she'd been talking about. He took a piece of fruitcake and sniffed it. "It came for the children first. I suppose if there's no kids, it would have to come for them," he said conversationally. "I don't get this sequel."

Reply

schizowarrior November 25 2007, 03:41:51 UTC
Oooo, now his delusions sounded interesting. Molly was separate enough from her own right now to be able to look at them at least somewhat objectively, and she wondered how they stacked up against this guy's. He was a different kind of crazy.

"What came for the children?" she asked, munching a piece herself. "And believe me, sequels are never as good as the original. Especially when they recycle costuming."

Reply


crazynotstoned November 25 2007, 06:21:07 UTC
Geoffrey didn't think much of the fruitcake, except as a kind of nice gesture from someone who was kind of a friend. It wasn't, you know, a great present, and he didn't celebrate Thanksgiving this month, but still, whatever. Cake. No good reason to pass up cake.

He took a big piece for himself and sat down at his desk, scribbling out his reply as he ate.

Molly,

thanks for the fruitcake, Im sure Ellen & I will get great use out of it. Happy American Thanksgiving! Are you looking forward to the

sorry, i forgot what i was writing about

and i cant f ind another piece of
oh well

this is some fruitcake! made by fruitcakes, for a fruitcake

ha ha

gt

Reply

schizowarrior November 25 2007, 06:29:54 UTC
Molly read the owl and grinned. It was so nice to know your culinary efforts were appreciated.

Geoffrey,

I'm glad you like it. Remember, no alcohol, and you might want to keep some bottled water nearby. Also, there's more where that came from! Sharing is caring, and all that.

(And having fruitcake made BY a fruitcake is what makes it work. It's the magic ingredient--well, that and Xanax.)

-Molly

Reply

crazynotstoned November 25 2007, 06:48:30 UTC

mm

nonono, i rememember what this feels like, beleve me.

did not think Id be feeling it again any time soon.

woooooooooo.

you know some people think this is what being crazy feels like?

gt

Reply

schizowarrior November 25 2007, 06:57:13 UTC
Geoffrey,

Really? What's it feel like? to me it's always kind of like being wrapped up in fluffed-out cotton balls that had been warmed up in the microwave. Or the dryer, with that nice dryer-sheet smell.

some people think being on fruitcake is the same as being A fruitcake? God, wouldn't that be nice.

-Molly

Reply


runaway_stark November 25 2007, 06:41:40 UTC
First, a return owl flew back to Molly:

Molly,

Thank you for the cake. We don't have that holiday in Westeros, but I appreciate it. Thank you for being so understanding.

I'm still practicing every day so you can join me whenever you feel like it.

Happy Thanksgiving to you, too.

-Arya

About ten minutes later, Arya poked her head into the Great Hall. The rest of her followed, though not exceptionally quickly. She felt like she was dragging herself through water, and she had to keep reminding herself that she was on her way to the Hospital Wing. She saw Molly and made her way over (every move looking like she was taking twice as much concentration as usual to make it look right, thus making her look decidedly weird.)

Once she was close enough that she wouldn't have to yell and make a scene, she made sure she was standing firmly on the ground and glared up at Molly, trying to hide her panic. "I think it was poisoned."

Reply

schizowarrior November 25 2007, 06:53:43 UTC
...oh hell. It wasn't supposed to cause that kind of reaction--it was supposed to be good fruitcake.

"What's going on?" she asked, hoping to God she hadn't just given the poor kid one more thing to be traumatized about. "What do you feel like?" She debated pointing out that no poison could be fatal here, and kept quiet--at the moment, that wasn't the issue.

Reply

runaway_stark November 25 2007, 07:04:12 UTC
"I ate about half of what you sent me, and then I started to feel... sleepy and dizzy and sort of calm." She paused, trying to remember what was so bad about that, and then added, "I don't usually feel like that. And now I can't really move." She started to panic again. "I think I need to go to the Hospital Wing."

Reply

schizowarrior November 25 2007, 07:12:09 UTC
Oh. Oh. Well, there was probably a way out of this that didn't involve lying.

"It's okay, honey," Molly said. "It's the fruitcake--it's supposed to do that. I should have warned you better; it's not like you'd've ever had fruitcake before." Nevermind that one technically had nothing to do with the other. "It's not poison, but if you want to go to the hospital wing, we can." Though, if her presents had found their way around it, the hospital wing might not be the most reassuring place in the world.

Reply


Return owl, warded somehow (although the sender isn't sure how he managed that one) bantersucks November 26 2007, 00:32:02 UTC
(Jaime was mildly distracted when he got the owl, and thus the important part of the message didn't register until after he'd had a bite - which was when the scarab bothered to give him a chemical breakdown. After a lot of facepalming and stumbling, he somehow managed to compose the following response:)

Molly -

Might wanna add drive or walk to stuff I'm not gonna do. for a while.

oooookay. it just hit.

remember when i didn't think you could medicate a headvoice? think i mighta been wrong


... )

Reply

Re: Return owl, warded somehow (although the sender isn't sure how he managed that one) schizowarrior November 26 2007, 01:03:30 UTC
Jaime,

Yeah, definitely no driving. You might want to make sure you drink some water, too--it can really dry your mouth out. Is it really working on your voice? Heeee! It always messed the Narrator up pretty good, too.

Um...okay, I'll ignore it. No I won't. What the hell IS that?

-Molly

Reply

Re: Return owl, warded somehow (although the sender isn't sure how he managed that one) bantersucks November 26 2007, 01:14:18 UTC
(There are more than a few ink stains on this note. And a water stain in the corner.)

molly -

water sounds good

kinda. it's got no idea whats going on though so its really confused. id have troubel explaining that sober so dont ask please.


... )

Reply

Re: Return owl, warded somehow (although the sender isn't sure how he managed that one) schizowarrior November 26 2007, 01:22:32 UTC
Molly blinked. Wow...she wasn't quite sure what to make of that.

Jaime,

yeah, that happens. At least yours isn't singing showtunes. (I hope.) there's nothing like being completely loopy and listening to bits of Phantom of the Opera.

...Okay, I have to ask. What the fuck does that say?

-Molly

Reply


Return owl from Nny waste_lock November 26 2007, 02:10:58 UTC
Molly,

Er, thanks? I'll let Devi decide if she wants to eat it of not.

-Nny

Reply

Re: Return owl from Nny schizowarrior November 26 2007, 02:40:01 UTC
Nny (and Devi),

You're welcome! I don't know if either if you would really like it, but it's traditional where I come from. This is the lite version, too; at least it won't put anyone into detox.

-Molly

Reply

Re: Return owl from Nny waste_lock November 26 2007, 02:45:03 UTC
Vaguely worried, Nny took both notes and the fruitcake and went in search of Devi. It was, of course, up to her if she ate it or not, but he hoped she wouldn't.

Reply

Re: Return owl from Nny immunityordeath November 26 2007, 03:37:53 UTC
Devi was currently curled up on a beanbag chair in the STFU suit, sketching, with a pile of Devinisian devils at her feet. She looked up when Nny entered, laying aside her sketchbook.

"Hey, you," she said. "What've you got there?"

Reply


Leave a comment

Up