Application for Lord Peter Wimsey
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
I don't know about favorites. Surely it depends on the circumstances, doesn't it? Still, I should say that there is little that can match a fine Camembert at the end of a meal, provided one has a proper wine to pair with it.
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
*sighs* As gauche as both of these subjects are, killing seems like a rather extreme measure. I suppose if pressed, I should be forced to kill whichever one threatened my life -- or Harriet's, or the boys' -- first. But I should strongly prefer to avoid killing altogether, you see.
3. What time is it where you are?
Five o'clock in the evening. I expect Bunter will want to know what we will be having for dinner.
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
Misses Tonks and Granger seem like engaging, intelligent young women.
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
I confess that I'm not so keen on bars. I much prefer the society of the Marlborough or Egotists' Club for that sort of thing.
B. Gryffindor - Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
Who am I to make a choice for Mr. Potter? I should hope that the young man would follow his heart and do what makes him happy. After all, the only sin that passion can commit is to be joyless.
C. Ravenclaw - You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.
Have you considered the services of a secretary? I know an excellent woman, Miss Climpson, who runs an agency for that sort of thing. Should you wish, I can put you in contact with her immediately.
D. Hufflepuff - Prove you are not useless.
Well, I have brought several murderers to justice, who might have otherwise gone uncaught, and who in several cases would have undoubtedly murdered again. I confess readily that it is not a pleasant business, but I continue to pursue it in the belief that I am assisting in the service of justice and the greater good of humankind.
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe.
I do believe there's a bottle or three of Chateau d'Yquem that we might enjoy, if that's to your taste.
I don't know about favorites. Surely it depends on the circumstances, doesn't it? Still, I should say that there is little that can match a fine Camembert at the end of a meal, provided one has a proper wine to pair with it.
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
*sighs* As gauche as both of these subjects are, killing seems like a rather extreme measure. I suppose if pressed, I should be forced to kill whichever one threatened my life -- or Harriet's, or the boys' -- first. But I should strongly prefer to avoid killing altogether, you see.
3. What time is it where you are?
Five o'clock in the evening. I expect Bunter will want to know what we will be having for dinner.
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
Misses Tonks and Granger seem like engaging, intelligent young women.
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
I confess that I'm not so keen on bars. I much prefer the society of the Marlborough or Egotists' Club for that sort of thing.
B. Gryffindor - Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
Who am I to make a choice for Mr. Potter? I should hope that the young man would follow his heart and do what makes him happy. After all, the only sin that passion can commit is to be joyless.
C. Ravenclaw - You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.
Have you considered the services of a secretary? I know an excellent woman, Miss Climpson, who runs an agency for that sort of thing. Should you wish, I can put you in contact with her immediately.
D. Hufflepuff - Prove you are not useless.
Well, I have brought several murderers to justice, who might have otherwise gone uncaught, and who in several cases would have undoubtedly murdered again. I confess readily that it is not a pleasant business, but I continue to pursue it in the belief that I am assisting in the service of justice and the greater good of humankind.
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe.
I do believe there's a bottle or three of Chateau d'Yquem that we might enjoy, if that's to your taste.