Concrit Post 5

[hmd_meme]

How's My Driving?

∞ comment with all the journals you RP with (and the communities they're from).
∞ reply to other people's comments (anon or logged in) with constructive criticism
∞ learn from the suggestions and profit!

► play nice! flaming will not be tolerated, and threads with such will be deleted. Save the wank for rp-anonmeme/roleplaysecrets► IP addresses are not

Comments

[el_hustino]

memento_eden
hailbeautyqueen Beauty Queen Etna from Disgaea
thunder_striker Fate T. Harlaown from Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha
blazing_style Adell from Disgaea
death_the_dad Death/Shinigami-Sama from Soul Eater

netherworld_rpg (I am also a Mod)
immolationbitch Vanessa from Luminous Arc
ages_like_wine Lillet Blan from GrimGrimoire
willninja4food Izuna from Izuna: Legend of the Unemployed Ninja
bigstebowski Master Big Star from Disgaea

mayfield_rpg
idkeatinmybff Kishin Asura from Soul Eater

Others of note (usually at dear_mun or other places):
of_my_legend THE LEGENDARY EXCALIBUR from Soul Eater
eminent_lady Mariya Shido from Maria✝Holic

Musebox and list of other characters in case there's someone else you want to mention.

I'm particularly concerned about Shinigami, Fate, Asura, and Mariya, but I'll gladly take crit concerning anyone, along with crit concerning my moderation of netherworld_rpg.

[hotandcoldrp]

The only one of your canons I'm familiar with is Soul Eater, and I can't think of a single thing about Shinigami that needs improvement. You've got a great balance between Totally And Inexplicably Goofy and Incredibly Wise and In The Know (which is part of why he's so goofy). And I can't say anything about Asura, because he hasn't gotten much characterization in the manga beyond the broad strokes and I haven't bothered catching up on the anime yet. :V

So basically keep doing what you're currently doing.

[el_hustino]

Your Asura is the reason I joined.

[el_hustino]

There are few things I consider greater triumphs than getting people to join new games.

Thank you, Anon, that means quite a bit to me.

[chloeas]

chloeas Chloe Sullivan - Smallville
fasterthan_you Wally West/The Flash - DC Comics
coverears God - Based on Dogma
lucifehr Lucifer - Mostly around Supernatural fandom
skmeow Selina Kyle/Catwoman - DC Comics

And a few others.

Mostly found at sixwordstories.

[hero_farmboy]

Great Chloe and from what I've seen of Selina, she's aces, too. I'm also really liking what you're doing with Wally, but as I know nothing of his canon, I can't say more than that! <3

[chloeas]

Aww thank you! That's nice to hear, especially about Selina. I never feel very confident writing her since she's now, hm, how can I put this? As obnoxiously loud as Chloe.

[roseargent]

Logged in comments preferred, but anon will not be disregarded as long as they're constructive. :)

Especially interested in concrit for Farfarello, as well as possible plot ideas or ways I can get my characters more involved. :)

Also, yes. I know. Be more active. Working on it!

@ damned

Farfarello [jei]
Leon Magnus [for_marian]
Sumeragi Subaru [broken_babylon]
Freyjadour Falenas [dawn_rune]
Tachibana Shito [strange_unlife]
Tokito [wild_right_hand]
Chidori [fear_attachment]
Eve [parasite_dawn]

@ microcosm_rp

Shido Tatsuhiko [midnight_dick]
Johnny Rayflo [boundelagabalus]

[atoli]

I do have something that threw me in for a bit of a loop concerning Chidori... I'm wondering, why did she suddenly seemed so concerned about just the aquillas? I thought the whole thing with that, including asking Junpei to solve that problem, to put it one way, and then publicly wanting "the talk" on the bulletin was uncharacteristic of her. I realize her and Junpei like each other a lot, however ... I definitely don't think that's something she would dive to, not so suddenly and willingly.

Otherwise, I think you've got a good handling on her. I just want to suggest developing her out of being dependent on Junpei, or at least not AS so. I admit I'm a little concerned otherwise may happen, so I just want to throw that out there.

Sorry I can't say anything else on your other characters; I don't know their canons.

[fear_attachment]

(reposting with no changes except: THANK YOU for commenting. I do really, really appreciate it and it's always better to have things to think about re: one's playing than to be going blind

[dambolis]

Full muse list here, but a basic run down:

thedollsyhouse:
flowing-alchemy
lefttotheworld
cagedinfection
invasivexam
Technically bearcatnun but she's pretty much about to be dropped.

cityofdesai:
transmuted-soul

memento-eden:
captured-maiden

[icarusxelric]

transmuted-soul

Post more. *hypocrite forever*

[dambolis]

I think I just need...more things to post about.

But you're totally right, I should. D: *should make a new post...idk tonight or as soon as she thinks of a good subject ;;*

FORGIVE ME?

[kurowoofy]

In theendisblip
- Riku (edgeoftheend)
- Kurogane (kurowoofy)
- Syaoran (Clone) (oneunmade)
- Tamaki Suoh (etoilesinguar)
- The Undertaker (loveinacoffin)
- Real Fai (justbyliving)

In toujourshotel
- Kurogane (kurowoofy)
- Yukito Tsukishiro / Yue (xiyue)

In cfeit_project
- Sephiroth (makosilver)

[cesia]

...you play The Undertaker *A* dslhjfgf omg ilu ♥

That and... well. You know I love your Kurogane very much. I shouldn't be trying to give you crit, because I'm biased D| And I think you're awesome the way you are, but... one thing? Make him spazz a bit more? Not that he should spazz as much time-line-ish, but he's a bit... just way too calm xD Even for him. I like him anyway <3

[kurowoofy]

Respectfully disagreeing with the comment above. I haven't been following your Kurogane very closely, so maybe I'm wrong, but I think he's got a good balance. He only flails a couple of times post-Nihon, so making him really any more flaily than he is (which isn't very, but I've seen him do it a couple of times) would be strange from his canon-point.