Concrit Post 16

[hmd_me]

How's My Driving?
∞ Comment with all the journals you RP with (and the communities they're from).
∞ Reply to other people's comments (anon or logged in) with constructive criticism.
∞ Learn from the suggestions and profit!

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Comments

[seal_the_deal]

Muselist [@ sixwordstories and smuttysws mainly]:

transwarp_beam - Scotty [Star Trek XI] Rebootverse
warpedrive - Scotty [Star Trek XI] Mirrorverse
mi_aosda - Scotty [Star Trek XI] Deaged
giveallshesgot - Scotty [Star Trek XI] Genderswapped

notacactus - Jda "Jay" Zagri [Trek OC]
lynn_creed - Lynn Creed [Trek OC]

seal_the_deal - Crowley [Good Omens/Supernatural]
liestoeveryone - Jonathan Carnahan [The Mummy/The Mummy Returns]
jackoffhearts - Jack Harkness [Doctor Who/Torchwood]
smegginghell - Dave Lister [Red Dwarf]
v_i_d_a - Very Intelligent Digital Assistant [Iron Man]

Note: I would especially appreciate feedback on Crowley and Lister, as they're my newest muses and the voices are still a bit shaky.

[srsbusinessk]

omai, I hadn't seen that you had your own thread. /fails

Crowley, Crowley, Crowley. What to say? I really really like the way you play him. He's very sarcastic and sneaky, the way he is in the show perfectly. He's also kind of creepy, which works really well. Lol. I think the only criticism I can really give is that he's a bit too..what's the word?...maybe cozy? I don't know how to explain it. Lol.

Pretty much, I think he warms up to people a little too easily. In canon, it takes him awhile to even partially treat Sam and Dean like allies, and even then, he keeps them at a distance. I'm not saying Crowley can't be friendly, I'm just saying it should be a suspicious kind of friendly, like he's trying to get something out of being someone's friend. He's a jerk like that

[seal_the_deal]

Heh, I know what you mean. I think the problem is that I'm trying to bring in elements from Good Omens which I should probably stop because it's clearly confusing me and everyone else. Ah well. New muses are always a bugger to break in. I'll work on it.

[srsbusinessk]

Well, that could definitely explain it. I've only ever heard of Good Omens in passing, so if that's the case, you might be doing perfectly and I wouldn't even know. XD;;

Either way, don't worry too much. It doesn't affect his characterization too much, just makes him a wee bit more huggable than he should be. lol.

[seal_the_deal]

My muse is deeply offended by the implication that he could be considered huggable XD

[srsbusinessk]

Pssshh, as soon as he made the Lovers in League joke, I totally wanted to squish him. Possibly one of my favorite jokes from the whole series. He's huggable. XD

[srsbusinessk]

And sorry if that comes off as really mean, I don't give concrit often. I'm usually too shy and just say "omgilu". ;;

Which reminds me

omgilu ♥

[seal_the_deal]

God no, don't apologise! Much as I love getting "omgilu" responses to these things, there's always that nagging little worry that actually your characterisation is terrible and everyone's just too nice to say so XD

Also, ILU2 <3

[notsabrina]

Uh, hi, can I play with your Crowley, like, forever.

I personally like the blending of Supernatural Crowley and Good Omens Crowley, but folks who are only familiar with one of the sources may be a little confused. But I think you carry it off well!

[seal_the_deal]

Yes. Yes you can.

\o/

Well I'm glad it works for someone ;) Everyone else can just continue being confused.

[mybrotherskeep]

So I was already sort of in stalker love with your Crowley, right? And then you were like "FFS READ GOOD OMENS" and then I did and then I pretty much started a fan club. It's very exclusive, and I'm pretty much the president.

Basically - your Crowley (if I haven't mentioned lately) is possibly one of the most well written Crowley's in the world. I think your blending of Good Omens and SPN is spot on, and you take the personality traits of them both and blend them so well you make a reader believe it's entirely possible Kripke should have been sued.

I also love the dynamic he has with Sam, and I hope that they have many more threads together snarking with each other over everything from the color of the sky to Dean's ability to get himself mostly dead. I'd offer you crit, but I really don't have any, except maybe that we don't have like twenty active threads right now.

Yep.

[seal_the_deal]

Fffff *flailyblush*

Dude, Kripke should ttly have been sued except not because SPN is awesome and suing of it would have made me sadface. But come on. If none of the writers on the show are Good Omens fans, I will eat my laptop. After all. Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery XD

WELL YOUR SAM IS ALSO MADE OF AWESOME. SO THERE.

And yes! I DEMAND MORE THREADS! MORE!