A stake will do for a spork for me.

[hickumu]

Do you want to read something funny?

I want to read something funny.

Do you want to read something as funny as excerpts from an Avon Historical Romance titled, I kid you not, Angel in My Bed?

Oh, you don't?

Too bad!

Comments

[polycistronic]

I still wonder how this stuff manages to get published.

[hickumu]

Half of our readings during the two weeks on romance novels were dedicated to explaining why this stuff gets published. And why this stuff gets published for as much as 20k in advances.

So, unfortunately, I could probably tell you.

[polycistronic]

I want to submit stuff to get published too! If I could get Heliosverse published I so would. Also this is why I don't read romance novels ever. But man it was funny reading this.

[hickumu]

Man, if you could get Heliosverse published, I would beat my way to the front of the line with a stick. Trufax. Honestly, with some editing you could definitely give it a shot. I'm always writing stuff up to try and get it published - my main failing is that I can't edit a finished product.

This is why you should never, ever read romance novels. But, well, we had to. And the scary part? I didn't even have to read the whole thing. I was able to answer every question we were assigned, in detail, with five chapters out of twenty three. And that was just because I had to skim to find the sexytimes.

But I am certainly happy to have entertained. Although the goal was to make you all suffer as I suffered.

[whuffle]

*laughs my ass off*

That was so worth the chance of clicking on the cut. Hilariously bad. Now maybe I'll get up the guts to see if I can submit better to a publisher.

[hickumu]

You could most certainly submit better to a publisher. Hell, I could submit better to a publisher. Stephanie Meyer could submit better to a publisher - at least she had a modicum of originality.

Romance novel writing is exceptionally formulaic. They don't take anyone who can't copy the formula.

[whuffle]

See that's the part where I'd probably get hung up. Writing to formula. I happen to prefer turning trope in it's head most of the time so romance novel publishers probably wouldn't like me much.

[hickumu]

Oh, god no. Romance novel publishers don't give manuscripts that don't fit the formula a second chance. That's why a lot of fans have made it as publishers - they're familiar enough with the formula to write it.

[hickumu]

There were almost several such literal moments, believe you me.

XD I know it's from a movie, but unfortunately I don't know which.

[telaryn]

2001: A Space Odyssey.

[hickumu]

Ah, thank you. Never did see that one.