ONE WITH AMERICA!
anonymous
May 18 2009, 23:13:09 UTC
So, I'm pretty sure you've heard the little rumor about America trying to take over Canada right? WELL IT'S TRUE!
Sure, he pretty much has Canada all to himself, but not completely! (He refuses to let Canada out of his sight after seeing him make out with Russia.)<--- ignore that.
So they'll either get married, or become one with America!!! Happy ending right? :D
(This story can either be funny and filled with MARRY ME DAMN IT![one-with-America-one-with-America]
Or filled with creepy "Mine. You'll always be mine, don't you understand that?" and what not. )
Re: ONE WITH AMERICA!
anonymous
May 19 2009, 04:03:43 UTC
Just ficlet - couldn't resist!
The door slammed open; England looked up, blinking. "Matthew?"
Canada looked - decidedly disheveled. His eyes were wide and white, hair tangled in a jumbled mess as he panted for breath. He stiffened suddenly, eyes going wide with horror before he dived forward, lunging underneath the table. "Keep him away from me!"
"What in the..."
The door slammed open yet again. "MATTHEW!" America bellowed from the doorway. He grabbed his brother by the foot."Brother!" His eyes sparkled as he struck a pose. "Let's get married, brother! Let's get married, married, married..." He hummed to himself, a skip in his step as he began dragging his brother bodily out of the room, Canada wailing all the while.
Gains and Losses (1/1)
anonymous
May 21 2009, 11:52:15 UTC
A/N - Originial fic didn't work out, gaah, but I hope this is okay. Even though this has already been filled. For some reason I love Minifest Destiny Al D: Which I shouldn't. Since I'm a proud Canadaian
When Canada goes to the alter the first time he is pulled, kicking and screaming the entire time. He spits in America’s face when the other country says I do and swears at him loudly, and in a manner Alfred never dreamed possible of the Canadian, when he is asked to do the same. The other countries turn their heads away, We don't have the resources to go against America, they mutter apologetically. He bestows Alfred with a curse for every one of them.
Mathew looses three teeth that day.
He doesn’t say I do.
When Canada goes to the alter the second time he is dragged, muffled curses barely audible due the gag in his mouth. He bites America’s hand when the other country pulls away the cloth. He glares as Alfred says I do and bites through his tongue when he is asked to do the same. The countries are still looking away and he kicks
( ... )
Re: Gains and Losses (1/1)
anonymous
May 22 2009, 07:33:11 UTC
Random anon popping in to say that that is a seriously awesome oneshot. Oh Matt, you fought till the very end (and will probably continue to do so despite being married) <3
Thanks for posting authornon! I thoroughly enjoyed it :D
Re: Gains and Losses (1/1)
anonymous
May 24 2009, 22:41:03 UTC
oh matthew...so canadian...fighting for as long as he can and then letting go so that his people don't end up dead. but canadians never give up completely do they? so he'll probably undermine alfred at each and every turn so passive-aggressively...is it wrong that i want to see canada (the people) slowly manage to push the american armies out? cause their military's not that bad either and they have 'cadets' where kids start learning the stuff when they're twelve i think. and a lot of the people actually know how to use older weapons and how to improvise. they just don't realize what they were learning back in summer camp.
How To Marry A Canadian: A Hero’s Guide in Five Easy Steps (1/5)
anonymous
May 28 2009, 13:51:00 UTC
So we've had a serious fill on this prompt. Now I think it's time for something a little less so. I originally wanted to reference the Manifest Destiny thing, with America going expansion-crazy, but I ended up with something a little more modern instead. I'm American, and I really wanted to play around with the whole stereotyped American attitude, so I hope you enjoy and no one um...gets offended and skewers me. XD
Step 1: Select Canadian
When America first says he wants to get married, he is greeted mostly with silence. With scoffs and hesitant laughter and later the barrel of a shotgun to his forehead as sweat drips down Mexico's chin and strands of hair stick to her cheeks. She shouts, "Get off my property, pendejo," and her tits bounce as she hoists the gun and spits in his face
( ... )
So glad you are enjoying the crack! I feel sorta bad for writing Alfred as such a jerk, but as much as I hate to admit it, this is pretty much the evolution of the American male. Good thing it's also effing hilarious. XD
Sure, he pretty much has Canada all to himself, but not completely! (He refuses to let Canada out of his sight after seeing him make out with Russia.)<--- ignore that.
So they'll either get married, or become one with America!!! Happy ending right? :D
(This story can either be funny and filled with MARRY ME DAMN IT![one-with-America-one-with-America]
Or filled with creepy "Mine. You'll always be mine, don't you understand that?" and what not. )
Reply
The door slammed open; England looked up, blinking. "Matthew?"
Canada looked - decidedly disheveled. His eyes were wide and white, hair tangled in a jumbled mess as he panted for breath. He stiffened suddenly, eyes going wide with horror before he dived forward, lunging underneath the table. "Keep him away from me!"
"What in the..."
The door slammed open yet again. "MATTHEW!" America bellowed from the doorway. He grabbed his brother by the foot."Brother!" His eyes sparkled as he struck a pose. "Let's get married, brother! Let's get married, married, married..." He hummed to himself, a skip in his step as he began dragging his brother bodily out of the room, Canada wailing all the while.
Russia looked on with profoundest sympathy.
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xDD
ANON THAT IS AMAZING.
/not OP BTW.
Belarus-esque!America :'D
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married, married, married... Oh America. Great ficlet!
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WILL YOU MARRY ME?! ♥
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Anyone want to pick up from here?
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the mental!image..oh lord.
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When Canada goes to the alter the first time he is pulled, kicking and screaming the entire time. He spits in America’s face when the other country says I do and swears at him loudly, and in a manner Alfred never dreamed possible of the Canadian, when he is asked to do the same. The other countries turn their heads away, We don't have the resources to go against America, they mutter apologetically. He bestows Alfred with a curse for every one of them.
Mathew looses three teeth that day.
He doesn’t say I do.
When Canada goes to the alter the second time he is dragged, muffled curses barely audible due the gag in his mouth. He bites America’s hand when the other country pulls away the cloth. He glares as Alfred says I do and bites through his tongue when he is asked to do the same. The countries are still looking away and he kicks ( ... )
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Thanks for posting authornon! I thoroughly enjoyed it :D
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Step 1: Select Canadian
When America first says he wants to get married, he is greeted mostly with silence. With scoffs and hesitant laughter and later the barrel of a shotgun to his forehead as sweat drips down Mexico's chin and strands of hair stick to her cheeks. She shouts, "Get off my property, pendejo," and her tits bounce as she hoists the gun and spits in his face ( ... )
Reply
Seriously, I love this! It's so hilarious and so much win! I can't wait for you to continue!
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XDD
This fic is looking epic already authornon!
Recaptcha: was scummy. HA! Perfect description to how Alfred is acting and how he's treating this marriage business XD
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Don't worry, anons, Kuma will have his moment! ♥
So glad you are enjoying the crack! I feel sorta bad for writing Alfred as such a jerk, but as much as I hate to admit it, this is pretty much the evolution of the American male. Good thing it's also effing hilarious. XD
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