Puppet Who 81-89
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chapter 81 ClocketPatch (clocketpatch)clocketpatch
Mary-Sue was stuffed, after much argument, under the kitchen table (she only consented when Jack agreed to sit with her and listen as she told the tale of her traumatic childhood, and listed off all of the wonderful traits she possessed which allowed her to come through all tribulation unscathed).
Nutcracker-Brig was also under the table (he was looking for the bottom half of his jaw).
The rest of the puppet crew stood along one wall chatting. Four kept offering his other selves jelly-babies. Seven muttered about mysteries unravelling and how everything would become clear soon. Ten sulked about being called a Gary-Sue.
These interactions were interrupted by a quiet cackling. The assembled puppets looked up to see that the blue box had changed its text, and in the space where the author’s name went…
“Oh No!!” cried the Brigadier-Nutcracker. “Not her!”
The cackling grew louder, before turning into nerd snorts.
“Yes!” hissed a sinister voice, “It is I Clocketpatch! An author of this fic who will write a critical scene and possibly muck it up!”
“No,” said Jack, “she’s always trying to advance the plot and up the stakes. All I want is a musical number and…”
“SILENCE!” shouted Clocketpatch. The puppets, unable to resist an author’s command, were quiet.
“Good, now. I’m about to enact radical scene changes. You are no longer in the TARDIS, you are back in the Pit of Despair!!!”
The white-roundelled walls of the console room wibbled and transformed into depressing rock walls of the pit. Sulky shadows and drippy bits were in abundance. Dead doll parts littered the fluff-stained ground. Replacing the console was the burnt out wreckage of the puppet ray.
Clocketpatch cackled.
“I think you can take it from here.”
---
Silence. The unnatural presence of the interfering author had vanished, but the puppets could still feel her name on the blue box, watching them.
“So…” Ten-puppet asked, twiddling his thumbs (and licking the wall once or twice to see how it tasted), “…what now?”
“Time will tell,” said Seven-puppet.
As soon as the words left his mouth a dark cloud began to form. It swirled, howled, and belched evil. This was it.
“Steady men,” said Nutcracker-Brig. He looked seriously at Mary-Sue. “Are you ready?”
Uncertainly fought with duty in her strange blue-green eyes. The fate of the universe rested on her small shoulders. Why? She didn’t know, but this was her destiny. She had known ever since that day all those years ago when her parents died in a tragic accident. She remembered her mother’s last words to her -
“Quit the angsty soliloquy and get on with it!” said Nine.
Mary-Sue took a step forward.
The black cloud condensed. Soon it would take corporal form…
The assembled puppets leaned forward.
The cloud squeezed and pulsated. It was becoming clearer and clearer with each passing instant. With one last twitch its form became clear -
“Oh aren’t you the cutest lil’ kitten in the world!” Mary-Sue squealed.
A tiny black-furred ball of fluff sat where the cloud had float a moment before.
“It’s a trick!” the assembled puppets yelled.
But Mary-Sue plunged forward. She had always loved animals, and they loved her.
“I’ll keep you safe!” she cooed.
She bent down and touched the kitten. Both of them vanished in a puff of smoke to be replaced a second later by an English man in a suit, well past middle-age, and looking decidedly stuffy.
“It’s worse than I thought,” said Seven-puppet, “All of you. Run!!”
“Who is it?” asked Fred, who was thoroughly confused. He was just a pizza delivery boy and this had, so far, been the weirdest day of his life. He sincerely hoped that he’d been hit by a car and was unconscious, otherwise, he felt certain that straight-jackets would be playing a heavy part in his future.
“It’s the Copy-Right Owner,” Ten-puppet said, a look of sheer terror on his face, “It’s the BBC!! Run!”
And they did.
But the BBC was right behind them, laughing manically.
“You can’t run from your creator!” it howled, black smoke spilling from its fingers.
The smoke touched One and Two and they vanished. The group of terrified puppets reached a dead end. A rock wall was behind them, the BBC before them.
“Please don’t cancel me again,” Seven sobbed.
“Oh no, it’s not you I want.” The BBC smiled maliciously and raised its hand into a pointing gesture. The puppet’s trembled, wondering who the BBC would pick. The finger waved back and forth before finally stopping on Ten.
“It’s you!”
chapter 82 Bily
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" cried Ten-puppet, his felt eyes growing wide. "IT CAN'T BE TRUE!"
"I...want...you..."
"LEAVE MY HUSBAND ALONE!!!" cried Rose-puppet, jumping between them, and pushing the BBC representative down to the ground.
"Oh God!" cried Spooney-Six, who had been left out of the plot for quite some time. "She's killed the BBC!"
"No," said Nine in a solemn tone. "It's not over yet. There's still one more person..."
"Not..."
"Yes. He'll be here any minute. The dreaded Russel T. Davies."
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" cried Four-puppet, running in circles.
--------------------
Meanwhile, back on the Valiant, Master-puppet and Zodin were plotting to take over the universe, using a new ray gun they call the Cackle Ray.
--------------------
Back in her flat, Bily, one of the authors, was typing away at her computer. Her father was currently out running errands, and her brother was watching the Disney channel.
--------------------
"I'm going to cancel you!" yelled RTD. "You've ruined everything! The good name of the BBC, and the good name of Doctor Who!"
"It's not my fault, I swear!" cried Ten. "It's the authors' fault! Please have mercy!"
"Authors..." RTD growled. He knew where he needed to be now.
--------------------
What a mistake. Because Bily typed those last few lines, she was in great danger. Her and every other author of this story.
And so she and the others were teleported into the BBC, where they sat at a large round table, before RTD, who was cackling.
Bily opened her mouth, but Herk quickly shushed her. Right now wasn't the time for a musical number.
"Well, well, well," said RTD, evilly. "Let us begin..."
chapter 83 moonmonkey (moonmonkeylj)
“Stop right there”
“Where?” asked RTD, against his better instincts and in some surprise,
“Here. There. Oh, I don’t know.. The point is, your fate was sealed in Chapter 79.”
“Seventy...Nine?”
“Yup 79. You know. The one where Ten-puppet was outed as a complete and utter Gary-Sue.”
“G-Gary…. Who?” stutters RTD.
“You heard.” snaps moonmonkey, whose Eight deprivation after only a couple of chapters without a single mention was making her really, really cranky….… She continues,
“You know. Ten-puppet is your Gary-Sue. Skinny, funny, hyper, sexy, gets the girl, loses the girl, gets another girl, she walks away after only a Christmas special, gets another girl, she walks away, and yet he still, still won’t admit maybe it’s not girls that are the answer…..”
“You!” barks RTD “Shut up now. Or I’m calling the Fox network and you’ll never see Eight-puppet again… And wipe that smirk off your face, ‘cos I’ve got TCM on speed-dial too, and if you ever want to watch, or rather listen to “Always Crashing In The Same Car”, any more….”
“OK, OK, you win” begs moonmonkey, cowering behind the others, as she so often does, “I know Bily got us into this, but she’s young… if quite evil…. What is it that you actually want..?”
chapter 84 herk (herk227)
“I want..." RTD began.
"I bet he says David Tennant." Herk interrupted. Although she was quiet good at shushing other authors, she never knew when to shut her own mouth. "It's like Tim Burton and Johnny Depp. He casts him everywhere because he has a crush on him." she explained to no one in particular, because everyone simply ignored her.
"I WANT..." RTD continued a little bit louder.
"You know I think he will say Jack." Clocketpatch said. "Everyone wants Jack. He has given him his own spin-off."
"I WANT..." RTD tried another time.
"Wanna bet?" Herk asked.
"Sure." Clocket agreed "The winner gets to kiss his favourite Doctor after this mess is finished 'kay?"
They both shook hands.
"Hey." Moonmonkey protested. "I want a piece of that action, too."
"And me." Bily agreed.
"I WANT TO BE HEARD OUT!" RTD shouted.
Everyone turned to face the now red faced man.
"Yes?" they asked calmly.
"I want to be admired for what I accomplished. I BROUGHT BACK Doctor Who, I hate to be dissed by anyone who thinks he can type two words, just because they didn't like season 2 or 3 or some of the episodes. I want a little respect, I think I deserve that. - And not to be bashed by fanfic authors all the time." He sniffed.
"Oh come on," Herk started (although she knew well the dangers of turning into a Mary-Sue) "You know we love you. You gave us the relaunch and the Time War and Rose and Christopher Eccleston and David Tennant" she added with a side look at Bily "This is just a bit of satire so don't get all worked up about it." She hugged him, because as the first rule of fanfic stated: A good hug never did any harm.
"And I want Jack." RTD pouted.
"Hah! I won!" ClocketPatch shouted in triumph.
-----------
And because there really was no problem at all, after the fic was closed (somewhen in a few chapters) Clocketpatch got a kiss from 3, Moonmonkey from 8, Bily from 10 and Herk from 9 and everyone was happy, even the Doctor
chapter 85 ThroughanAmberfocus (amberfocus )
Well, almost everyone was happy. ThroughanAmberFocus still had some things to say. “This isn’t just about what you want.” Suddenly RTD’s eyes lost focus, or rather refocused on ThroughanAmberFocus who was laughing quietly, having taken control of the scene when no one was watching. She liked doing that.
“What?” He said, not at all liking the look on her face.
“I’ve waited as long as I possibly could,” she said. “But what happens next is all your fault. You’ve no one to blame but yourself.”
RTD looked on in horror as Jackie-Tyler-puppet popped into existence. She rounded on RTD.
“Trying to interfere with a perfectly innocent piece of fan fiction are you?” she said, smacking him upside the head with her soft woolen hand. “Think that’s your right, hmm?”
“It is my right. These are my characters,” he protested.
Jackie-Tyler-puppet advanced on him. “Well, maybe we don’t always like what you do with your characters.” she shouted. “Like dropping them in parallel universes and separating them from the loves of their lives!”
“I gave you the love of your life.” he shouted back.
Jackie-puppet rolled her eyes. This worked quite well as her eyes were googly eyes. “Not talking about me, am I? Not a main character, me. It’s what you did to my daughter-puppet that I’m talking about. These poor authors are innocent! They’re only fixing the heartbreak you caused the universe when you split those two up!” She pointed to Ten-puppet and Rose-puppet.
RTD opened his mouth to protest again, but Jackie-puppet wasn’t done. “You made the universe love Rose and then you took her away from them, er…I mean him! What did you bloody expect would happen?”
RTD was now looking thoroughly cowed. “I…I…”
“And we won’t even get into how you took Nine away from everyone when we’d only just gotten to know him.”
“Hey, now, that wasn’t my choice!” RTD burst out. “He wanted to leave.”
“Don’t care.” said Jackie-puppet. “You made everybody love him and then boom, new face, new body, new new Doctor.”
“Not that it’s in anyway a bad face or body or new new Doctor.” Moonmonkey piped up.
“Not at all.” agreed Bily.
“Not really.” added Herk.
“But you can’t expect us to just sit here and take it when we can make it better,” added ThroughanAmberFocus.
“But, but…” RTD gathered himself together. “But they’re mine!”
“The argument of a toddler isn’t going to get you that far.” snapped Jackie-puppet.
RTD growled. “Fine, just remember you asked for this, then.”
Suddenly the door flew open and Evil Eight charged in and headed right for RTD. “But you’re mine, too.” he exclaimed as the man came towards him.
Evil Eight smiled. “I was yours. Now I have a life of my own.” He advanced menacingly on the program head.
chapter 86 herk (herk227 )
"Uh-oh." Herk murmured.
"What?" ThroughanAmberFocus asked.
Jackie-puppet meanwhile had turned to Evil Eight with a greedy expression on her face.
"This isn't good. The universe of fanfic authors mixing with reality mixing with the puppet-verse. If we don't do something quickly every barrier between every verse will collapse."
"And? Doesn't that mean crossover heaven?"
"For a while yes, but then it will turn into crossover hell - for example multiple Jacks will have to exist parallely, because otherwise he could never manage to shagg all the characters that will stand in a cue to get to him: Jeanette from Forever Knight, Tom Paris from Voyager, Spike, Lorne, Angel, Wesley and the rest of the Buffyverse,..."
"And how is that bad?" RTD asked out of the corner, where he hid from the puppets.
"Ultimately every universe will end to exist." Nine-puppet said gloomily. "And even Jack isn't worth that."
"Hey!" almost everyone protested (including Jackie-puppet)
"So what do we do?" Moonmonkey asked.
"Well isn't that obvious? We send everyone back where they belong just through our powers as authors. RTD into real London BBC, us to our homes and the puppets back into the safely confined borders of their fic right before they noticed the blue box." ClocketPatch explained.
"Oh- OK." Bily agreed and they did it.
--------
Back on the TARDIS everyone wondered how they all had gotten into the kitchen and what the hell had happened during the last chap..- hours. Why would they think of chapters now?
chapter 87 ClocketPatch (clocketpatch )
That was when they realised -
“I’m not a puppet anymore!” they all shouted simultaneously.
chapter 88 herk (herk227 )
"But why?" Rose-pupp... Sorry - Rose asked.
-----
Somewhere else a short while ago...
"Luke."
"Yes, mum?"
"What are you doing up here? You know you're not allowed in the attic on your own. There's too much dangerous stuff up here."
"Sorry mum."
Sarah-Jane noticed how her son shielded Mr. Smith's monitor from her view.
"What are you hiding Luke?"
"Nothing." he answered a bit too hastily.
She gave him her best 'Don't give me that shit' look.
"What Luke?" she asked again more sternly.
"It's just something Maria told me about. She said everyone knew about it, and when I wanted to be a normal person I had to learn about such things. But I didn't want to ask you, it would have been so embarrassing."
*Great, she told him about sex and now he stumbled about some porn in the internet. I feared this talk would come.*
"Luke there's nothing to be embarrassed about." she told him.
"But when Maria and Clyde talked about Erwin and his bird, they were really embarrassed, when I asked them about it."
"Erwin and his bird?" *Not sex?* "Ohh you mean Ernie and Bert, they talked about a children's TV program."
"They called it puppets. And I asked Mr. Smith about it. He said he would demonstrate it to me."
"Demonstrate?" Sarah-Jane suddenly remembered a very strange phone call she had had about two weeks ago.
"Oh my god, let me see that monitor." She shoved Luke aside.
"Mr. Smith what have you done?"
"I used some of the alien equipment up here to help the boys education Sarah-Jane."
"Undo it, right now, or I will get you a microsoft update."
------
"But why?" Rose asked.
"Who cares." Nine said "We've got bigger problems right now."
chapter 89 Bily
"So," said Rose, looking into the Doctor's chocolate brown eyes. "I guess it's just you and me now. No more Ten Doctors."
"Nope," he replied, lost in her hazel eyes. "Just you and me."
"That's the way I like it."
"Me too."
Just as they were about to close the gap between them, Jack popped up out of nowhere, music playing behind him.
Suddenly many teenagers clad in beach attire appeared behind Jack, and began to sing...
Everybody all for one,
A real summer has just begun!
Let's rock and roll and just let go,
feel the rhythm of the drums
We're gonna have fun in the sun
Now that all the hard work, work is done!
Everybody, one for all, everybody all for one,
A real summer has just begun!
Let's rock and roll and just let go,
feel the rhythm of the drums
We're gonna have fun in the sun
Now that all the hard work, work is done!
Come on, everyone let's dance!
We can't let this moment pass!
Let's make this party last!
All for one!
All! For! One!
And that was that.
--------------------
THE END.
bonus material
chapter 81 ClocketPatch (clocketpatch)clocketpatch
Mary-Sue was stuffed, after much argument, under the kitchen table (she only consented when Jack agreed to sit with her and listen as she told the tale of her traumatic childhood, and listed off all of the wonderful traits she possessed which allowed her to come through all tribulation unscathed).
Nutcracker-Brig was also under the table (he was looking for the bottom half of his jaw).
The rest of the puppet crew stood along one wall chatting. Four kept offering his other selves jelly-babies. Seven muttered about mysteries unravelling and how everything would become clear soon. Ten sulked about being called a Gary-Sue.
These interactions were interrupted by a quiet cackling. The assembled puppets looked up to see that the blue box had changed its text, and in the space where the author’s name went…
“Oh No!!” cried the Brigadier-Nutcracker. “Not her!”
The cackling grew louder, before turning into nerd snorts.
“Yes!” hissed a sinister voice, “It is I Clocketpatch! An author of this fic who will write a critical scene and possibly muck it up!”
“No,” said Jack, “she’s always trying to advance the plot and up the stakes. All I want is a musical number and…”
“SILENCE!” shouted Clocketpatch. The puppets, unable to resist an author’s command, were quiet.
“Good, now. I’m about to enact radical scene changes. You are no longer in the TARDIS, you are back in the Pit of Despair!!!”
The white-roundelled walls of the console room wibbled and transformed into depressing rock walls of the pit. Sulky shadows and drippy bits were in abundance. Dead doll parts littered the fluff-stained ground. Replacing the console was the burnt out wreckage of the puppet ray.
Clocketpatch cackled.
“I think you can take it from here.”
---
Silence. The unnatural presence of the interfering author had vanished, but the puppets could still feel her name on the blue box, watching them.
“So…” Ten-puppet asked, twiddling his thumbs (and licking the wall once or twice to see how it tasted), “…what now?”
“Time will tell,” said Seven-puppet.
As soon as the words left his mouth a dark cloud began to form. It swirled, howled, and belched evil. This was it.
“Steady men,” said Nutcracker-Brig. He looked seriously at Mary-Sue. “Are you ready?”
Uncertainly fought with duty in her strange blue-green eyes. The fate of the universe rested on her small shoulders. Why? She didn’t know, but this was her destiny. She had known ever since that day all those years ago when her parents died in a tragic accident. She remembered her mother’s last words to her -
“Quit the angsty soliloquy and get on with it!” said Nine.
Mary-Sue took a step forward.
The black cloud condensed. Soon it would take corporal form…
The assembled puppets leaned forward.
The cloud squeezed and pulsated. It was becoming clearer and clearer with each passing instant. With one last twitch its form became clear -
“Oh aren’t you the cutest lil’ kitten in the world!” Mary-Sue squealed.
A tiny black-furred ball of fluff sat where the cloud had float a moment before.
“It’s a trick!” the assembled puppets yelled.
But Mary-Sue plunged forward. She had always loved animals, and they loved her.
“I’ll keep you safe!” she cooed.
She bent down and touched the kitten. Both of them vanished in a puff of smoke to be replaced a second later by an English man in a suit, well past middle-age, and looking decidedly stuffy.
“It’s worse than I thought,” said Seven-puppet, “All of you. Run!!”
“Who is it?” asked Fred, who was thoroughly confused. He was just a pizza delivery boy and this had, so far, been the weirdest day of his life. He sincerely hoped that he’d been hit by a car and was unconscious, otherwise, he felt certain that straight-jackets would be playing a heavy part in his future.
“It’s the Copy-Right Owner,” Ten-puppet said, a look of sheer terror on his face, “It’s the BBC!! Run!”
And they did.
But the BBC was right behind them, laughing manically.
“You can’t run from your creator!” it howled, black smoke spilling from its fingers.
The smoke touched One and Two and they vanished. The group of terrified puppets reached a dead end. A rock wall was behind them, the BBC before them.
“Please don’t cancel me again,” Seven sobbed.
“Oh no, it’s not you I want.” The BBC smiled maliciously and raised its hand into a pointing gesture. The puppet’s trembled, wondering who the BBC would pick. The finger waved back and forth before finally stopping on Ten.
“It’s you!”
chapter 82 Bily
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" cried Ten-puppet, his felt eyes growing wide. "IT CAN'T BE TRUE!"
"I...want...you..."
"LEAVE MY HUSBAND ALONE!!!" cried Rose-puppet, jumping between them, and pushing the BBC representative down to the ground.
"Oh God!" cried Spooney-Six, who had been left out of the plot for quite some time. "She's killed the BBC!"
"No," said Nine in a solemn tone. "It's not over yet. There's still one more person..."
"Not..."
"Yes. He'll be here any minute. The dreaded Russel T. Davies."
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" cried Four-puppet, running in circles.
--------------------
Meanwhile, back on the Valiant, Master-puppet and Zodin were plotting to take over the universe, using a new ray gun they call the Cackle Ray.
--------------------
Back in her flat, Bily, one of the authors, was typing away at her computer. Her father was currently out running errands, and her brother was watching the Disney channel.
--------------------
"I'm going to cancel you!" yelled RTD. "You've ruined everything! The good name of the BBC, and the good name of Doctor Who!"
"It's not my fault, I swear!" cried Ten. "It's the authors' fault! Please have mercy!"
"Authors..." RTD growled. He knew where he needed to be now.
--------------------
What a mistake. Because Bily typed those last few lines, she was in great danger. Her and every other author of this story.
And so she and the others were teleported into the BBC, where they sat at a large round table, before RTD, who was cackling.
Bily opened her mouth, but Herk quickly shushed her. Right now wasn't the time for a musical number.
"Well, well, well," said RTD, evilly. "Let us begin..."
chapter 83 moonmonkey (moonmonkeylj)
“Stop right there”
“Where?” asked RTD, against his better instincts and in some surprise,
“Here. There. Oh, I don’t know.. The point is, your fate was sealed in Chapter 79.”
“Seventy...Nine?”
“Yup 79. You know. The one where Ten-puppet was outed as a complete and utter Gary-Sue.”
“G-Gary…. Who?” stutters RTD.
“You heard.” snaps moonmonkey, whose Eight deprivation after only a couple of chapters without a single mention was making her really, really cranky….… She continues,
“You know. Ten-puppet is your Gary-Sue. Skinny, funny, hyper, sexy, gets the girl, loses the girl, gets another girl, she walks away after only a Christmas special, gets another girl, she walks away, and yet he still, still won’t admit maybe it’s not girls that are the answer…..”
“You!” barks RTD “Shut up now. Or I’m calling the Fox network and you’ll never see Eight-puppet again… And wipe that smirk off your face, ‘cos I’ve got TCM on speed-dial too, and if you ever want to watch, or rather listen to “Always Crashing In The Same Car”, any more….”
“OK, OK, you win” begs moonmonkey, cowering behind the others, as she so often does, “I know Bily got us into this, but she’s young… if quite evil…. What is it that you actually want..?”
chapter 84 herk (herk227)
“I want..." RTD began.
"I bet he says David Tennant." Herk interrupted. Although she was quiet good at shushing other authors, she never knew when to shut her own mouth. "It's like Tim Burton and Johnny Depp. He casts him everywhere because he has a crush on him." she explained to no one in particular, because everyone simply ignored her.
"I WANT..." RTD continued a little bit louder.
"You know I think he will say Jack." Clocketpatch said. "Everyone wants Jack. He has given him his own spin-off."
"I WANT..." RTD tried another time.
"Wanna bet?" Herk asked.
"Sure." Clocket agreed "The winner gets to kiss his favourite Doctor after this mess is finished 'kay?"
They both shook hands.
"Hey." Moonmonkey protested. "I want a piece of that action, too."
"And me." Bily agreed.
"I WANT TO BE HEARD OUT!" RTD shouted.
Everyone turned to face the now red faced man.
"Yes?" they asked calmly.
"I want to be admired for what I accomplished. I BROUGHT BACK Doctor Who, I hate to be dissed by anyone who thinks he can type two words, just because they didn't like season 2 or 3 or some of the episodes. I want a little respect, I think I deserve that. - And not to be bashed by fanfic authors all the time." He sniffed.
"Oh come on," Herk started (although she knew well the dangers of turning into a Mary-Sue) "You know we love you. You gave us the relaunch and the Time War and Rose and Christopher Eccleston and David Tennant" she added with a side look at Bily "This is just a bit of satire so don't get all worked up about it." She hugged him, because as the first rule of fanfic stated: A good hug never did any harm.
"And I want Jack." RTD pouted.
"Hah! I won!" ClocketPatch shouted in triumph.
-----------
And because there really was no problem at all, after the fic was closed (somewhen in a few chapters) Clocketpatch got a kiss from 3, Moonmonkey from 8, Bily from 10 and Herk from 9 and everyone was happy, even the Doctor
chapter 85 ThroughanAmberfocus (amberfocus )
Well, almost everyone was happy. ThroughanAmberFocus still had some things to say. “This isn’t just about what you want.” Suddenly RTD’s eyes lost focus, or rather refocused on ThroughanAmberFocus who was laughing quietly, having taken control of the scene when no one was watching. She liked doing that.
“What?” He said, not at all liking the look on her face.
“I’ve waited as long as I possibly could,” she said. “But what happens next is all your fault. You’ve no one to blame but yourself.”
RTD looked on in horror as Jackie-Tyler-puppet popped into existence. She rounded on RTD.
“Trying to interfere with a perfectly innocent piece of fan fiction are you?” she said, smacking him upside the head with her soft woolen hand. “Think that’s your right, hmm?”
“It is my right. These are my characters,” he protested.
Jackie-Tyler-puppet advanced on him. “Well, maybe we don’t always like what you do with your characters.” she shouted. “Like dropping them in parallel universes and separating them from the loves of their lives!”
“I gave you the love of your life.” he shouted back.
Jackie-puppet rolled her eyes. This worked quite well as her eyes were googly eyes. “Not talking about me, am I? Not a main character, me. It’s what you did to my daughter-puppet that I’m talking about. These poor authors are innocent! They’re only fixing the heartbreak you caused the universe when you split those two up!” She pointed to Ten-puppet and Rose-puppet.
RTD opened his mouth to protest again, but Jackie-puppet wasn’t done. “You made the universe love Rose and then you took her away from them, er…I mean him! What did you bloody expect would happen?”
RTD was now looking thoroughly cowed. “I…I…”
“And we won’t even get into how you took Nine away from everyone when we’d only just gotten to know him.”
“Hey, now, that wasn’t my choice!” RTD burst out. “He wanted to leave.”
“Don’t care.” said Jackie-puppet. “You made everybody love him and then boom, new face, new body, new new Doctor.”
“Not that it’s in anyway a bad face or body or new new Doctor.” Moonmonkey piped up.
“Not at all.” agreed Bily.
“Not really.” added Herk.
“But you can’t expect us to just sit here and take it when we can make it better,” added ThroughanAmberFocus.
“But, but…” RTD gathered himself together. “But they’re mine!”
“The argument of a toddler isn’t going to get you that far.” snapped Jackie-puppet.
RTD growled. “Fine, just remember you asked for this, then.”
Suddenly the door flew open and Evil Eight charged in and headed right for RTD. “But you’re mine, too.” he exclaimed as the man came towards him.
Evil Eight smiled. “I was yours. Now I have a life of my own.” He advanced menacingly on the program head.
chapter 86 herk (herk227 )
"Uh-oh." Herk murmured.
"What?" ThroughanAmberFocus asked.
Jackie-puppet meanwhile had turned to Evil Eight with a greedy expression on her face.
"This isn't good. The universe of fanfic authors mixing with reality mixing with the puppet-verse. If we don't do something quickly every barrier between every verse will collapse."
"And? Doesn't that mean crossover heaven?"
"For a while yes, but then it will turn into crossover hell - for example multiple Jacks will have to exist parallely, because otherwise he could never manage to shagg all the characters that will stand in a cue to get to him: Jeanette from Forever Knight, Tom Paris from Voyager, Spike, Lorne, Angel, Wesley and the rest of the Buffyverse,..."
"And how is that bad?" RTD asked out of the corner, where he hid from the puppets.
"Ultimately every universe will end to exist." Nine-puppet said gloomily. "And even Jack isn't worth that."
"Hey!" almost everyone protested (including Jackie-puppet)
"So what do we do?" Moonmonkey asked.
"Well isn't that obvious? We send everyone back where they belong just through our powers as authors. RTD into real London BBC, us to our homes and the puppets back into the safely confined borders of their fic right before they noticed the blue box." ClocketPatch explained.
"Oh- OK." Bily agreed and they did it.
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Back on the TARDIS everyone wondered how they all had gotten into the kitchen and what the hell had happened during the last chap..- hours. Why would they think of chapters now?
chapter 87 ClocketPatch (clocketpatch )
That was when they realised -
“I’m not a puppet anymore!” they all shouted simultaneously.
chapter 88 herk (herk227 )
"But why?" Rose-pupp... Sorry - Rose asked.
-----
Somewhere else a short while ago...
"Luke."
"Yes, mum?"
"What are you doing up here? You know you're not allowed in the attic on your own. There's too much dangerous stuff up here."
"Sorry mum."
Sarah-Jane noticed how her son shielded Mr. Smith's monitor from her view.
"What are you hiding Luke?"
"Nothing." he answered a bit too hastily.
She gave him her best 'Don't give me that shit' look.
"What Luke?" she asked again more sternly.
"It's just something Maria told me about. She said everyone knew about it, and when I wanted to be a normal person I had to learn about such things. But I didn't want to ask you, it would have been so embarrassing."
*Great, she told him about sex and now he stumbled about some porn in the internet. I feared this talk would come.*
"Luke there's nothing to be embarrassed about." she told him.
"But when Maria and Clyde talked about Erwin and his bird, they were really embarrassed, when I asked them about it."
"Erwin and his bird?" *Not sex?* "Ohh you mean Ernie and Bert, they talked about a children's TV program."
"They called it puppets. And I asked Mr. Smith about it. He said he would demonstrate it to me."
"Demonstrate?" Sarah-Jane suddenly remembered a very strange phone call she had had about two weeks ago.
"Oh my god, let me see that monitor." She shoved Luke aside.
"Mr. Smith what have you done?"
"I used some of the alien equipment up here to help the boys education Sarah-Jane."
"Undo it, right now, or I will get you a microsoft update."
------
"But why?" Rose asked.
"Who cares." Nine said "We've got bigger problems right now."
chapter 89 Bily
"So," said Rose, looking into the Doctor's chocolate brown eyes. "I guess it's just you and me now. No more Ten Doctors."
"Nope," he replied, lost in her hazel eyes. "Just you and me."
"That's the way I like it."
"Me too."
Just as they were about to close the gap between them, Jack popped up out of nowhere, music playing behind him.
Suddenly many teenagers clad in beach attire appeared behind Jack, and began to sing...
Everybody all for one,
A real summer has just begun!
Let's rock and roll and just let go,
feel the rhythm of the drums
We're gonna have fun in the sun
Now that all the hard work, work is done!
Everybody, one for all, everybody all for one,
A real summer has just begun!
Let's rock and roll and just let go,
feel the rhythm of the drums
We're gonna have fun in the sun
Now that all the hard work, work is done!
Come on, everyone let's dance!
We can't let this moment pass!
Let's make this party last!
All for one!
All! For! One!
And that was that.
--------------------
THE END.
bonus material