The Boys of Summer - Chapter 9
oh deary me, i am so sorry i took this long to update. but my mum's currently having time off which means i get to do pretty much nothing because she always wants to do something with me. mothers *shakes head* but she will be off to holiday on tuesday, thank the heavens so i will get to update sooner and more often, yay!
anyway, enough chat, more story, eh?
Title: The Boys of Summer
Author: me
Rating: PG-13 (swearing)
Chapter: 9/16
Genre: AU - Romance
Pairing: Poynter/Judd yet again
Summary: The holiday’s over …
Disclaimer: me no own, this no true
Dedication: everyone who read and commented on the previous chapter … orpheous87, stfoosa, juddpoynter, syphilisparade, roguecharmedone, imaginarymisery, foreverlove_xx, elphee, katybase, bffimagine, iheartdougie, jedisnickers, juweel, dictionary1, star55, star55, hidden_angel_07, juuanna and armillarysphere
Author’s note: If you’re more on the sentimental side, tending to tear up easily, here’s some advise from me to you for this chapter … Get your tissues out! Tissues not tissue!
Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7, Chapter 8
Chapter 9
For the rest of the summer, Harry and Dougie were just more inseparable than they have been before. Not a minute was spent apart from each other, neither awake nor asleep. Not a second passed in which the two boys weren’t holding hands, kissing or holding onto each other. And there were several nights in which Sam had a hard time finding sleep due to the noises coming from the other bedroom.
However, after weeks had passed, too soon for both boy’s liking, their time together was nearing the end. They had tried to push it away by just ignoring the days running by on the calender but that made the dreaded moment only come so much quicker.
Harry was the first to leave, two days before Dougie and Sam did. His brother had arrived in town by now as well and everything had been taken care of. Harry’s stuff had been gathered from his family’s house and his old school and was brought to his new home. There was a room for him in Thomas and Joanne’s house and they had found a new school for him to go to.
Thomas had tried getting some sense into his mother but Mrs Judd had been as stubborn all the way through. In her opinion, Harry still made a life-threatening mistake and nothing that Thomas or Mr Judd said could make her change her mind. They all knew that, as soon as she was back home, the existence of her youngest son would be nothing more than a distant memory for her.
Not that Harry bothered, though. He knew his mother would never change her mind and he was fine with it, knowing that he wouldn’t change his mind either. To him, his family now consisted of his father, Thomas and Joanne. And there still were Dougie and Sam. Thanks to several phone calls he had also gotten to known Jazzie quite well already. She was quirky, honest and blunt, obviously something that ran in the family, and Harry had immediately liked her even if he had just heard her voice through the phoneline.
Besides, Harry had more important things to tend to during the last days of his holiday than thinking of his mother. He had to focus on Dougie. He knew how hard it was for the younger boy to near the end of their holiday, their summer. Dougie tried hard to not show it but fear of what was awaiting him once back home, clung to him like a ghost, occupied his mind. Same as the thought of being separated from Harry.
Another night and Dougie was clinging tightly onto Harry as the two of them laid on their bed.
“I want to stop the time right now.” Dougie confessed, “Don’t make tomorrow come.” He leaned up, looking at Harry. “Everything you’ll do from now on will be for the last time because you’re leaving tomorrow.”
Harry sighed. “I know, Dougie. And I hate it as much as you do, I really do. But it’s … we can’t stop it from happening, as much as we might want to.”
“It’s unfair though.”
“I know it is but see it this way, we’ll appreciate our time together so much more from now on. We’ll be sitting in school scribbling each other’s names on every piece of paper we find, not paying attention to the lessons. And we’ll have niggly little arguments on the phone for 15 minutes about who’s missing who more and who’ll hang up first. We’ll get on the nerves of the people around us because all we’ll talk about is the other one. You’ll finally get what you always wanted. That kind of love that makes you tingly all over and smile the whole time.”
Dougie huffed. “I wouldn’t mind having it with you being there though.”
“I know Dougie. But you know how they say … abscense makes the heart grow fonder.”
“Whoever said that was full of bollocks, really.”
Harry laughed lightly and pulled Dougie closer. “God, will I miss your way with words.”
“I hope that’s not the only thing you’ll miss.”
“No, god no! I will miss everything about you. Those little noises you make in your sleep or when I do this …” Harry pinched Dougie’s waist to which the other let out a slight giggle before Harry continued. “I will miss how you look at me while trying to figure out what’s going through my mind. I will miss watching the sun with you too, it’s not gonna be the same again with you not being there.”
At this, Dougie’s eyes slowly started to water and a first few tears ran down his face, landing on Harry’s naked chest.
Harry swallowed, being close to tears himself but still, he kept on speaking. “I will miss that smirk on your face when you’re up to something and the sparkle in your eyes you have in that moment before you kiss me. Come to think of it, I will miss your kisses and you touching just the right parts of my body at the perfect moment. I will miss falling asleep and waking up next to you. I will -”
“Stop it, Harry!” Dougie finally got out between tears, “No need for plain torture here, yeah? I get your point. You’ll miss me. And just so you know, I’ll miss you too … you big pile of clichés.”
Dougie looked up at Harry again and forced a smile through his tears. Harry forced a smile back but as soon as his eyes met Dougie’s it was his undoing and tears spilled from his eyes. He pulled Dougie back closer to him and both boys laid there, silently crying.
It was Dougie who calmed himself down by taking a few deep breaths first. He sat up and straddled Harry’s waist, his thumbs wiping the tears from his face. Harry just looked up at Dougie and willed his cries to stop. He covered Dougie’s hands with his own and just looked at his boyfriend’s face.
“Make love to me.” Harry whispered.
Dougie looked down at Harry in surprise. So far he had always been on the receiving end, Harry doing all the giving. Both had been fine with it, getting the same pleasure from their actions anyway.
“But Harry, you … you’ve never …” Dougie stuttered, still too stunned to form any coherent sentence.
Harry just nodded. “I want this, Dougie. I’m sure.”
Dougie then nodded as well before leaning down and capturing his boyfriend’s lips in a passionate kiss, getting inbetween Harry’s legs, tugging at first his own, then at Harry’s boxershorts.
===
When Harry woke up the next morning, he felt like screaming out loud. It was only a few more hours until Thomas would come to pick him up and take him away, to his new home. His father would also come by later to say goodbye to him. The next few hours would be the hardest hours Harry ever had to go through.
But what made it even harder was that he knew he would have to say goodbye to Dougie and Sam. Aside from the fact that Dougie was his boyfriend, him and Sam had been there for Harry when he needed someone the most, had replaced his family without even thinking twice. Knowing that he had to say goodbye to them, breaking apart, hurt him to the core. Almost automatically, tears sprung back to his eyes and he sobbed silently.
Dougie woke from the light shaking that came from the body underneath his. He kept his eyes closed but he could hear that Harry was crying again. And he knew why. Knowing that their goodbye came close pulled both of them apart from the inside. Only that Harry never showed it much, trying to comfort Dougie in his sadness and not making him feel worse by letting his own sadness become obvious as well.
However, when Dougie’s own tears spilled onto Harry’s chest, Harry knew his boyfriend now was awake as well. Without saying anything he held onto Dougie tighter and ran his hands through the other boy’s hair.
“We’ll turn this into a waterbed.” Dougie choked out after a few moments, chuckling through his cries.
“I know.” Harry responded, without stopping to cry himself.
The two kept laying for a few more moments until Harry was the first to move. He patted Dougie’s shoulder and proceeded to sit up.
“Time to get up, Dougie. Come on.”
Dougie violently shook his head. “No, let’s keep laying here. We’ll pretend to be asleep when they’ll come get us.”
“Won’t change the fact that I will have to go at some point. Come on Dougie, don’t make it harder for the both of us. Get up.”
Reluctantly, Dougie peeled himself away from Harry and the two got out of bed, going into the bathroom. In silence they went through their morning business, before going back into the room to change into their normal clothing and Harry put the last things into his bag before zipping it up. He looked around the room, making sure he hadn’t forgotten anything.
“I think I’m done.” he stated.
“Awesome.” Dougie said, his voice dripping with sarcasm.
Harry crossed the room until he was stood in front of Dougie who sat on the bed. He cupped the younger boy’s face with his hands and forced him to look up at him.
“Dougie, I know this sucks. But cheer up, alright? For me. I don’t want to climb into the car later, your sad face in my mind.”
“Then don’t climb into the fucking car.”
“Dougie, you know that I have to. And there’s no point in moping, I’ll come to visit you in just two weeks. Time’s gonna fly by like nothing.”
“Yeah, as if.” Dougie huffed and crossed his arms in front of his chest.
Harry only shook his head and leaned down to kiss Dougie. The younger resisted but only for a few seconds until he responded to Harry’s kiss and held onto Harry’s hands that were still cupping his face.
After a bit there came a knock on the door. Sam poked her head in, covering her eyes with her hand just in case.
“You boys better be decent because I’m going to reveal my eyes in just … oh.” Sam looked at the two of them, obviously surprised that they were already dressed and done. “Harry, your dad is downstairs.”
Harry nodded. “Alright. We’ll be there in a second.”
Sam nodded as well before she left again to head downstairs. Harry moved to pick up his bag and rucksack to bring them downstairs with him. He wouldn’t be leaving already, his dad only came over to have a last breakfast with him but he figured it be better to bring his belongings downstairs with him now. Saying goodbye in steps and not all at once later when he would have to go through the house again to gather his things.
With Dougie by his side Harry headed for the door. In the doorframe he turned around again, taking in the room in which he had spend a large amount of the past weeks in. The window through which he watched many sunrises with Dougie. The bed which sheets held both of their scents. The guitar on which Dougie often played songs to him.
Dougie also let his eyes wander around the room. They settled on the chair by the desk, Harry’s hoodie still hanging over the back of it. He rushed to get it. He closed his eyes, breathing in Harry’s scent that still lingered somewhere deep within the fabric. He snapped out of his trancelike state and when he handed the hoodie back to his boyfriend, Harry only shook his head.
“Keep it. It’s more yours than mine anyway.”
“But I … no.”
“Yes, Dougie. Keep it.”
Tears threatened to spill from Dougie’s eyes again but he squeezed his eyes shut, willing them away. “Thank you.” he whispered. He put on the hoodie and and leaned up to place a short kiss on Harry’s lips.
They pulled away from each other after a few seconds and finally made their way downstairs. They placed Harry’s stuff by the front door before making their way to the kitchen where Sam and Harry’s father were already sitting at the table.
“Morning.” Harry mumbled, sitting down, helping himself with the items set on the table. Dougie followed his lead, being on his usual spot on Harry’s lap.
Sam studied both boys carefully. She’d been too aware of the sadness that was hanging above the two boys like a dark raincloud throughout the past days. It tore her apart to see how the two of them were suffering, knowing that, for once, she couldn’t do anything to make it better.
“You okay?” she asked, though by one look at the sad eyes of her son, she already knew the answer she was about to get.
“Fucking peachy, mum.” Dougie replied sarcastically, adding a “Sorry.” upon realising that Mr Judd was with them and he better watched his language.
Mr Judd shrugged his shoulders. “It’s okay. I can only imagine how tough this is for the both of you.”
“Yeah …” Dougie trailed off sadly.
The rest of breakfast was spend in silence. Dougie clung onto Harry for dear life, Harry holding him in place with just the same intensity. Both boys weren’t hungry at all but they forced their breakfast down upon seeing the worried looks they got from their parents.
When they were done with breakfast they still had some time until Harry was being picked up by his brother. They decided to go to the beach one last time, to the place where their story had begun.
They sat on their spot on the stone wall, staring out to the sea, letting the breeze graze them. Their entwined hands were placed between them, their shoulders touching.
“Full circle.” Dougie muttered, lost in thoughts.
“Hm?” Harry turned to look at him.
“This is where it began, where we first met. And this is where we’re being pulled apart. Full circle.”
“Yeah.” Harry agreed before pausing for a moment. “Would you’ve thought things went like this when we first met?”
Dougie shook his head, chuckling. “Not in a million years. I was just glad that there was finally someone to hang around with who wasn’t younger than ten or older than thirty. I thought you were really hot though. Standing there, holding your shoes and socks and looking at me, being obviously mesmerised by me and my talent on the guitar.”
Harry grinned. “Yeah, right.”
Dougie grinned as well. “You know it.” He softly shoved his leg against Harry’s. “Would you have thought things would turn out like that?”
“Hell no. But I’m glad they did. Because if you take away all the drama with my mum, me breaking apart from my family and hating the fact that I will have to leave you in less than an hour … I had the best time of my life. And I wouldn’t swap it for anything in the world.” He squeezed Dougie’s hand to emphasise his point.
Dougie squeezed back. “Neither would I. Though … I could deal without the whole saying goodbye thing.”
“Yeah.” Harry agreed.
The two of them kept sitting on their spot for a while longer, not saying anything, just kissing every now and then, enjoying their last moments with each other. That was until the sharp ringing of Harry’s mobile phone disturbed their moment. They both immediately knew what this meant. Thomas had arrived and was ready to get Harry.
Harry didn’t even check the caller ID. He only picked up, said, “We’re coming.” and hung up again.
Harry hopped off the wall, not ready to walk back to the house, but knowing he had to. Dougie kept sitting on the wall, staring at the sea, not moving an inch. Harry wrapped his arms around Dougie’s waist from behind, his head resting between the other’s shoulderblades as Dougie was now towering over him.
“You wanna stay here?” Harry asked, knowing that this was the question Dougie was just asking himself. Should he stay here, avoiding the dreaded goodbye, going back to the house when he knew that Harry had left already?
“Will it make things easier?” Dougie asked.
“I don’t think so. But if you wanna stay and not come back with me, I’ll understand it. I don’t wanna force you through the whole scene.”
Dougie thought for another moment before he shook his head. “No, it’s okay. I’m coming. The more time with you the better. Even if it’s just two extra minutes.”
Dougie hopped off the wall and holding hands, the two slowly walked back to the house, each step they took hurting them even more.
They reached the house, seeing Thomas, Sam and Mr Judd all awaiting them on the patio with worried faces.
“Your stuff is in the car already.” Thomas informed Harry.
“Okay.” Harry turned around to Sam and his father. “This is it, then.” he sighed. He stepped forward and hugged his father. “Thanks dad. For everything. I owe you big time, really.”
“Don’t worry about it.” Mr Judd replied, “Live your life the way you want and we’re even. And remember, if you need anything or just want to talk to someone … no matter the time, you know where I am.”
Harry nodded. “Yeah. Good luck with mum.”
“It’ll be alright.”
Harry then let go of his father and stepped over to Sam who already had tears in her eyes. For the first time since they had met, Sam had been crying which ripped Harry’s insides apart just that little bit more. He hugged her as well.
“Thank you so much, Sam. I have no idea what I would’ve done without you.”
“It’s alright, honey. I’m glad I could help. I’ll see you in two weeks, yeah?”
“You will. And take good care of Dougie, he’s going to need you no matter how much he’s going to deny it.”
Sam nodded and used the tissue in her hand to wipe her tears away when the two of them let go of each other.
Finally, Harry turned back to Dougie, who was holding onto the banister of the patio they were standing on.
“Come here.” Harry just said and pulled Dougie close.
As soon as Dougie was settled in Harry’s embrace, he started to cry again, once more clinging onto Harry for dear life.
“I love you, Dougie.” Harry choked out while holding Dougie tight to his body.
Dougie couldn’t answer, only nodded his head, tightening his embrace even more.
It took Harry all his emotional stregth to let go of Dougie. He looked into the blue eyes of the younger one and forced a smile. “I’ll be seeing you in just two weeks.” He leaned in closer to whisper into Dougie’s ear. “We finally get a chance for phone and cyber sex.”
Even though Dougie didn’t want to, he let out a laugh.
“There you go, that’s what I wanna see.” Harry pecked Dougie’s nose. “You’ll see, those two weeks will fly by like nothing. And until then you can tell Jazzie that your boyfriend is so much better than hers.”
Again, Dougie smiled before a thought struck him. “Fuck, I forgot something!” he got out, “I’ll be back in a sec, don’t move.”
In a flash, Dougie had pulled away from Harry and sprinted up the stairs to his room, getting a little giftbag from a drawer of his dresser. He grabbed it and ran back down.
“That’s for you.” he said, handing Harry the bag.
Harry squinted inside the bag before pulling out its contents. One was a t-shirt. Not only one t-shirt though, it was Dougie’s favorite Blink 182 t-shirt which had been wearing on the day they met. Dougie must have soaked it in his deodorant since an unmistakable wave of it immediately reached Harry’s nose. The other item was a necklace of wooden beads, looking identical like the one Dougie was wearing. He also pulled out a framed picture. It showed Dougie and Harry in their usual position, Dougie on Harry’s lap at the kitchen table, both looking down at their entwined hands on Dougie’s lap, not having eyes nor ears for anything else. Sam must have taken the picture when both didn’t notice it.
Carefully, Harry stuffed the presents back into the colourful giftbag. “Thanks Dougie.” He leaned forward, kissing Dougie again, letting his tongue slip into the other boy’s mouth one last time.
When they pulled away, Dougie’s eyes were glistening, same as Harry’s. Dougie took a deep breath.
“Just get in this bloody car already.”
Harry nodded. He followed Thomas who was already standing by their car, waiting for Harry to get in. Before he opened the door on the passenger’s side, he took one last look at his father, Sam and Dougie on the patio. His father had a supporting hand on Sam’s shoulder, Sam held onto Dougie from behind and Dougie just held onto the banister of the patio again. After one last wave at them, Harry finally got into the car.
Thomas also got into the car, starting the engine only seconds later to back out of the driveway before turning onto the actual street. Harry cast a look in the rearview mirror, looking back at the house as they drove down the street.
The last thing he saw was that Dougie let go of the supporting banister and ran back into the house. And Harry knew what he would be doing. Laying down on the bed, crying into the pillows.
Harry sighed and averted his eyes. He got his mp3-player out of his rucksack, brought the headphones to his ears and turned the music on. He leaned his head against the rest behind him, staring out of the window, not bothering to wipe away the tears running down his cheeks.
To be continued …
A/N 2: This was one of my favorite chapters of the whole story, if not my favorite altogether. Why? Well, cause I like the whole drama/sadness-thing a bit too much sometimes.
At the same time it was also the hardest to write because it was a bit more personal than my stories usually are.
Comments are appreciated.
anyway, enough chat, more story, eh?
Title: The Boys of Summer
Author: me
Rating: PG-13 (swearing)
Chapter: 9/16
Genre: AU - Romance
Pairing: Poynter/Judd yet again
Summary: The holiday’s over …
Disclaimer: me no own, this no true
Dedication: everyone who read and commented on the previous chapter … orpheous87, stfoosa, juddpoynter, syphilisparade, roguecharmedone, imaginarymisery, foreverlove_xx, elphee, katybase, bffimagine, iheartdougie, jedisnickers, juweel, dictionary1, star55, star55, hidden_angel_07, juuanna and armillarysphere
Author’s note: If you’re more on the sentimental side, tending to tear up easily, here’s some advise from me to you for this chapter … Get your tissues out! Tissues not tissue!
Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7, Chapter 8
Chapter 9
For the rest of the summer, Harry and Dougie were just more inseparable than they have been before. Not a minute was spent apart from each other, neither awake nor asleep. Not a second passed in which the two boys weren’t holding hands, kissing or holding onto each other. And there were several nights in which Sam had a hard time finding sleep due to the noises coming from the other bedroom.
However, after weeks had passed, too soon for both boy’s liking, their time together was nearing the end. They had tried to push it away by just ignoring the days running by on the calender but that made the dreaded moment only come so much quicker.
Harry was the first to leave, two days before Dougie and Sam did. His brother had arrived in town by now as well and everything had been taken care of. Harry’s stuff had been gathered from his family’s house and his old school and was brought to his new home. There was a room for him in Thomas and Joanne’s house and they had found a new school for him to go to.
Thomas had tried getting some sense into his mother but Mrs Judd had been as stubborn all the way through. In her opinion, Harry still made a life-threatening mistake and nothing that Thomas or Mr Judd said could make her change her mind. They all knew that, as soon as she was back home, the existence of her youngest son would be nothing more than a distant memory for her.
Not that Harry bothered, though. He knew his mother would never change her mind and he was fine with it, knowing that he wouldn’t change his mind either. To him, his family now consisted of his father, Thomas and Joanne. And there still were Dougie and Sam. Thanks to several phone calls he had also gotten to known Jazzie quite well already. She was quirky, honest and blunt, obviously something that ran in the family, and Harry had immediately liked her even if he had just heard her voice through the phoneline.
Besides, Harry had more important things to tend to during the last days of his holiday than thinking of his mother. He had to focus on Dougie. He knew how hard it was for the younger boy to near the end of their holiday, their summer. Dougie tried hard to not show it but fear of what was awaiting him once back home, clung to him like a ghost, occupied his mind. Same as the thought of being separated from Harry.
Another night and Dougie was clinging tightly onto Harry as the two of them laid on their bed.
“I want to stop the time right now.” Dougie confessed, “Don’t make tomorrow come.” He leaned up, looking at Harry. “Everything you’ll do from now on will be for the last time because you’re leaving tomorrow.”
Harry sighed. “I know, Dougie. And I hate it as much as you do, I really do. But it’s … we can’t stop it from happening, as much as we might want to.”
“It’s unfair though.”
“I know it is but see it this way, we’ll appreciate our time together so much more from now on. We’ll be sitting in school scribbling each other’s names on every piece of paper we find, not paying attention to the lessons. And we’ll have niggly little arguments on the phone for 15 minutes about who’s missing who more and who’ll hang up first. We’ll get on the nerves of the people around us because all we’ll talk about is the other one. You’ll finally get what you always wanted. That kind of love that makes you tingly all over and smile the whole time.”
Dougie huffed. “I wouldn’t mind having it with you being there though.”
“I know Dougie. But you know how they say … abscense makes the heart grow fonder.”
“Whoever said that was full of bollocks, really.”
Harry laughed lightly and pulled Dougie closer. “God, will I miss your way with words.”
“I hope that’s not the only thing you’ll miss.”
“No, god no! I will miss everything about you. Those little noises you make in your sleep or when I do this …” Harry pinched Dougie’s waist to which the other let out a slight giggle before Harry continued. “I will miss how you look at me while trying to figure out what’s going through my mind. I will miss watching the sun with you too, it’s not gonna be the same again with you not being there.”
At this, Dougie’s eyes slowly started to water and a first few tears ran down his face, landing on Harry’s naked chest.
Harry swallowed, being close to tears himself but still, he kept on speaking. “I will miss that smirk on your face when you’re up to something and the sparkle in your eyes you have in that moment before you kiss me. Come to think of it, I will miss your kisses and you touching just the right parts of my body at the perfect moment. I will miss falling asleep and waking up next to you. I will -”
“Stop it, Harry!” Dougie finally got out between tears, “No need for plain torture here, yeah? I get your point. You’ll miss me. And just so you know, I’ll miss you too … you big pile of clichés.”
Dougie looked up at Harry again and forced a smile through his tears. Harry forced a smile back but as soon as his eyes met Dougie’s it was his undoing and tears spilled from his eyes. He pulled Dougie back closer to him and both boys laid there, silently crying.
It was Dougie who calmed himself down by taking a few deep breaths first. He sat up and straddled Harry’s waist, his thumbs wiping the tears from his face. Harry just looked up at Dougie and willed his cries to stop. He covered Dougie’s hands with his own and just looked at his boyfriend’s face.
“Make love to me.” Harry whispered.
Dougie looked down at Harry in surprise. So far he had always been on the receiving end, Harry doing all the giving. Both had been fine with it, getting the same pleasure from their actions anyway.
“But Harry, you … you’ve never …” Dougie stuttered, still too stunned to form any coherent sentence.
Harry just nodded. “I want this, Dougie. I’m sure.”
Dougie then nodded as well before leaning down and capturing his boyfriend’s lips in a passionate kiss, getting inbetween Harry’s legs, tugging at first his own, then at Harry’s boxershorts.
===
When Harry woke up the next morning, he felt like screaming out loud. It was only a few more hours until Thomas would come to pick him up and take him away, to his new home. His father would also come by later to say goodbye to him. The next few hours would be the hardest hours Harry ever had to go through.
But what made it even harder was that he knew he would have to say goodbye to Dougie and Sam. Aside from the fact that Dougie was his boyfriend, him and Sam had been there for Harry when he needed someone the most, had replaced his family without even thinking twice. Knowing that he had to say goodbye to them, breaking apart, hurt him to the core. Almost automatically, tears sprung back to his eyes and he sobbed silently.
Dougie woke from the light shaking that came from the body underneath his. He kept his eyes closed but he could hear that Harry was crying again. And he knew why. Knowing that their goodbye came close pulled both of them apart from the inside. Only that Harry never showed it much, trying to comfort Dougie in his sadness and not making him feel worse by letting his own sadness become obvious as well.
However, when Dougie’s own tears spilled onto Harry’s chest, Harry knew his boyfriend now was awake as well. Without saying anything he held onto Dougie tighter and ran his hands through the other boy’s hair.
“We’ll turn this into a waterbed.” Dougie choked out after a few moments, chuckling through his cries.
“I know.” Harry responded, without stopping to cry himself.
The two kept laying for a few more moments until Harry was the first to move. He patted Dougie’s shoulder and proceeded to sit up.
“Time to get up, Dougie. Come on.”
Dougie violently shook his head. “No, let’s keep laying here. We’ll pretend to be asleep when they’ll come get us.”
“Won’t change the fact that I will have to go at some point. Come on Dougie, don’t make it harder for the both of us. Get up.”
Reluctantly, Dougie peeled himself away from Harry and the two got out of bed, going into the bathroom. In silence they went through their morning business, before going back into the room to change into their normal clothing and Harry put the last things into his bag before zipping it up. He looked around the room, making sure he hadn’t forgotten anything.
“I think I’m done.” he stated.
“Awesome.” Dougie said, his voice dripping with sarcasm.
Harry crossed the room until he was stood in front of Dougie who sat on the bed. He cupped the younger boy’s face with his hands and forced him to look up at him.
“Dougie, I know this sucks. But cheer up, alright? For me. I don’t want to climb into the car later, your sad face in my mind.”
“Then don’t climb into the fucking car.”
“Dougie, you know that I have to. And there’s no point in moping, I’ll come to visit you in just two weeks. Time’s gonna fly by like nothing.”
“Yeah, as if.” Dougie huffed and crossed his arms in front of his chest.
Harry only shook his head and leaned down to kiss Dougie. The younger resisted but only for a few seconds until he responded to Harry’s kiss and held onto Harry’s hands that were still cupping his face.
After a bit there came a knock on the door. Sam poked her head in, covering her eyes with her hand just in case.
“You boys better be decent because I’m going to reveal my eyes in just … oh.” Sam looked at the two of them, obviously surprised that they were already dressed and done. “Harry, your dad is downstairs.”
Harry nodded. “Alright. We’ll be there in a second.”
Sam nodded as well before she left again to head downstairs. Harry moved to pick up his bag and rucksack to bring them downstairs with him. He wouldn’t be leaving already, his dad only came over to have a last breakfast with him but he figured it be better to bring his belongings downstairs with him now. Saying goodbye in steps and not all at once later when he would have to go through the house again to gather his things.
With Dougie by his side Harry headed for the door. In the doorframe he turned around again, taking in the room in which he had spend a large amount of the past weeks in. The window through which he watched many sunrises with Dougie. The bed which sheets held both of their scents. The guitar on which Dougie often played songs to him.
Dougie also let his eyes wander around the room. They settled on the chair by the desk, Harry’s hoodie still hanging over the back of it. He rushed to get it. He closed his eyes, breathing in Harry’s scent that still lingered somewhere deep within the fabric. He snapped out of his trancelike state and when he handed the hoodie back to his boyfriend, Harry only shook his head.
“Keep it. It’s more yours than mine anyway.”
“But I … no.”
“Yes, Dougie. Keep it.”
Tears threatened to spill from Dougie’s eyes again but he squeezed his eyes shut, willing them away. “Thank you.” he whispered. He put on the hoodie and and leaned up to place a short kiss on Harry’s lips.
They pulled away from each other after a few seconds and finally made their way downstairs. They placed Harry’s stuff by the front door before making their way to the kitchen where Sam and Harry’s father were already sitting at the table.
“Morning.” Harry mumbled, sitting down, helping himself with the items set on the table. Dougie followed his lead, being on his usual spot on Harry’s lap.
Sam studied both boys carefully. She’d been too aware of the sadness that was hanging above the two boys like a dark raincloud throughout the past days. It tore her apart to see how the two of them were suffering, knowing that, for once, she couldn’t do anything to make it better.
“You okay?” she asked, though by one look at the sad eyes of her son, she already knew the answer she was about to get.
“Fucking peachy, mum.” Dougie replied sarcastically, adding a “Sorry.” upon realising that Mr Judd was with them and he better watched his language.
Mr Judd shrugged his shoulders. “It’s okay. I can only imagine how tough this is for the both of you.”
“Yeah …” Dougie trailed off sadly.
The rest of breakfast was spend in silence. Dougie clung onto Harry for dear life, Harry holding him in place with just the same intensity. Both boys weren’t hungry at all but they forced their breakfast down upon seeing the worried looks they got from their parents.
When they were done with breakfast they still had some time until Harry was being picked up by his brother. They decided to go to the beach one last time, to the place where their story had begun.
They sat on their spot on the stone wall, staring out to the sea, letting the breeze graze them. Their entwined hands were placed between them, their shoulders touching.
“Full circle.” Dougie muttered, lost in thoughts.
“Hm?” Harry turned to look at him.
“This is where it began, where we first met. And this is where we’re being pulled apart. Full circle.”
“Yeah.” Harry agreed before pausing for a moment. “Would you’ve thought things went like this when we first met?”
Dougie shook his head, chuckling. “Not in a million years. I was just glad that there was finally someone to hang around with who wasn’t younger than ten or older than thirty. I thought you were really hot though. Standing there, holding your shoes and socks and looking at me, being obviously mesmerised by me and my talent on the guitar.”
Harry grinned. “Yeah, right.”
Dougie grinned as well. “You know it.” He softly shoved his leg against Harry’s. “Would you have thought things would turn out like that?”
“Hell no. But I’m glad they did. Because if you take away all the drama with my mum, me breaking apart from my family and hating the fact that I will have to leave you in less than an hour … I had the best time of my life. And I wouldn’t swap it for anything in the world.” He squeezed Dougie’s hand to emphasise his point.
Dougie squeezed back. “Neither would I. Though … I could deal without the whole saying goodbye thing.”
“Yeah.” Harry agreed.
The two of them kept sitting on their spot for a while longer, not saying anything, just kissing every now and then, enjoying their last moments with each other. That was until the sharp ringing of Harry’s mobile phone disturbed their moment. They both immediately knew what this meant. Thomas had arrived and was ready to get Harry.
Harry didn’t even check the caller ID. He only picked up, said, “We’re coming.” and hung up again.
Harry hopped off the wall, not ready to walk back to the house, but knowing he had to. Dougie kept sitting on the wall, staring at the sea, not moving an inch. Harry wrapped his arms around Dougie’s waist from behind, his head resting between the other’s shoulderblades as Dougie was now towering over him.
“You wanna stay here?” Harry asked, knowing that this was the question Dougie was just asking himself. Should he stay here, avoiding the dreaded goodbye, going back to the house when he knew that Harry had left already?
“Will it make things easier?” Dougie asked.
“I don’t think so. But if you wanna stay and not come back with me, I’ll understand it. I don’t wanna force you through the whole scene.”
Dougie thought for another moment before he shook his head. “No, it’s okay. I’m coming. The more time with you the better. Even if it’s just two extra minutes.”
Dougie hopped off the wall and holding hands, the two slowly walked back to the house, each step they took hurting them even more.
They reached the house, seeing Thomas, Sam and Mr Judd all awaiting them on the patio with worried faces.
“Your stuff is in the car already.” Thomas informed Harry.
“Okay.” Harry turned around to Sam and his father. “This is it, then.” he sighed. He stepped forward and hugged his father. “Thanks dad. For everything. I owe you big time, really.”
“Don’t worry about it.” Mr Judd replied, “Live your life the way you want and we’re even. And remember, if you need anything or just want to talk to someone … no matter the time, you know where I am.”
Harry nodded. “Yeah. Good luck with mum.”
“It’ll be alright.”
Harry then let go of his father and stepped over to Sam who already had tears in her eyes. For the first time since they had met, Sam had been crying which ripped Harry’s insides apart just that little bit more. He hugged her as well.
“Thank you so much, Sam. I have no idea what I would’ve done without you.”
“It’s alright, honey. I’m glad I could help. I’ll see you in two weeks, yeah?”
“You will. And take good care of Dougie, he’s going to need you no matter how much he’s going to deny it.”
Sam nodded and used the tissue in her hand to wipe her tears away when the two of them let go of each other.
Finally, Harry turned back to Dougie, who was holding onto the banister of the patio they were standing on.
“Come here.” Harry just said and pulled Dougie close.
As soon as Dougie was settled in Harry’s embrace, he started to cry again, once more clinging onto Harry for dear life.
“I love you, Dougie.” Harry choked out while holding Dougie tight to his body.
Dougie couldn’t answer, only nodded his head, tightening his embrace even more.
It took Harry all his emotional stregth to let go of Dougie. He looked into the blue eyes of the younger one and forced a smile. “I’ll be seeing you in just two weeks.” He leaned in closer to whisper into Dougie’s ear. “We finally get a chance for phone and cyber sex.”
Even though Dougie didn’t want to, he let out a laugh.
“There you go, that’s what I wanna see.” Harry pecked Dougie’s nose. “You’ll see, those two weeks will fly by like nothing. And until then you can tell Jazzie that your boyfriend is so much better than hers.”
Again, Dougie smiled before a thought struck him. “Fuck, I forgot something!” he got out, “I’ll be back in a sec, don’t move.”
In a flash, Dougie had pulled away from Harry and sprinted up the stairs to his room, getting a little giftbag from a drawer of his dresser. He grabbed it and ran back down.
“That’s for you.” he said, handing Harry the bag.
Harry squinted inside the bag before pulling out its contents. One was a t-shirt. Not only one t-shirt though, it was Dougie’s favorite Blink 182 t-shirt which had been wearing on the day they met. Dougie must have soaked it in his deodorant since an unmistakable wave of it immediately reached Harry’s nose. The other item was a necklace of wooden beads, looking identical like the one Dougie was wearing. He also pulled out a framed picture. It showed Dougie and Harry in their usual position, Dougie on Harry’s lap at the kitchen table, both looking down at their entwined hands on Dougie’s lap, not having eyes nor ears for anything else. Sam must have taken the picture when both didn’t notice it.
Carefully, Harry stuffed the presents back into the colourful giftbag. “Thanks Dougie.” He leaned forward, kissing Dougie again, letting his tongue slip into the other boy’s mouth one last time.
When they pulled away, Dougie’s eyes were glistening, same as Harry’s. Dougie took a deep breath.
“Just get in this bloody car already.”
Harry nodded. He followed Thomas who was already standing by their car, waiting for Harry to get in. Before he opened the door on the passenger’s side, he took one last look at his father, Sam and Dougie on the patio. His father had a supporting hand on Sam’s shoulder, Sam held onto Dougie from behind and Dougie just held onto the banister of the patio again. After one last wave at them, Harry finally got into the car.
Thomas also got into the car, starting the engine only seconds later to back out of the driveway before turning onto the actual street. Harry cast a look in the rearview mirror, looking back at the house as they drove down the street.
The last thing he saw was that Dougie let go of the supporting banister and ran back into the house. And Harry knew what he would be doing. Laying down on the bed, crying into the pillows.
Harry sighed and averted his eyes. He got his mp3-player out of his rucksack, brought the headphones to his ears and turned the music on. He leaned his head against the rest behind him, staring out of the window, not bothering to wipe away the tears running down his cheeks.
To be continued …
A/N 2: This was one of my favorite chapters of the whole story, if not my favorite altogether. Why? Well, cause I like the whole drama/sadness-thing a bit too much sometimes.
At the same time it was also the hardest to write because it was a bit more personal than my stories usually are.
Comments are appreciated.