Quiet Thoughts (ota)
Mary woke up today knowing exactly what day it was - Sam's birthday. She had never celebrated Sam's birthday before as he had never turned a year old and she knew now that she never would. All those missed birthday cakes and parties and presents. Mary wanted to do something for her son now, but the truth was, she didn't know him well enough to get him a present he would enjoy. She didn't know her own son.
She had baked a cake for Sam and got him a gift certificate to the music store, but it felt like a shallow gesture. Mary wasn't naive and new that it would take time to become close to her boys, but if she was being truthful, it hurt that it wasn't as natural as she had hoped. Her boys were a little distant as if they were holding something back from her. Even John.
Mary found herself walking through the park around lunch time as she tried to rid her mind of the melancholy thoughts, but it was hard. One of the happiest days of her life was now looming over her, reminding her that she failed as a mother.
She stooped down near the edge of the lake and sat, letting her eyes roam over the surface of the water. Suddenly the sting of threatening tears was felt and Mary closed her eyes as she got control of herself again.
Keep it together, Mary.
She had baked a cake for Sam and got him a gift certificate to the music store, but it felt like a shallow gesture. Mary wasn't naive and new that it would take time to become close to her boys, but if she was being truthful, it hurt that it wasn't as natural as she had hoped. Her boys were a little distant as if they were holding something back from her. Even John.
Mary found herself walking through the park around lunch time as she tried to rid her mind of the melancholy thoughts, but it was hard. One of the happiest days of her life was now looming over her, reminding her that she failed as a mother.
She stooped down near the edge of the lake and sat, letting her eyes roam over the surface of the water. Suddenly the sting of threatening tears was felt and Mary closed her eyes as she got control of herself again.
Keep it together, Mary.