[This dream is scary, and Chitose knows now she doesn't know Sakura like she thought. But Sakura still helped her, and she wants to help Sakura somehow, because a dream like this must hurt. She remembers something her mother said when she had a nightmare.]
...It's okay, since... D-dreams aren't real. So... Bad things in dreams are just pretend.
[Private to Pain]ground_breakerSeptember 24 2009, 03:44:12 UTC
[He's right.
There's something wrong when the person who invaded your village twice, who blew it up once, is right.
But he is. About everything.
She was incredibly foolish.
She did die a shinobi in battle but she betrayed her people too and she can't reconcile the two. The first doesn't matter in the face of the second. Maybe the first was punishment for the second. If it was, it wasn't enough.
[Private to Sakura]eternalscorpionSeptember 24 2009, 03:05:21 UTC
[I'm sorry. Don't blame yourself. None of it was your fault. You gave your life for the village, didn't you?That had been what he'd wanted to say to her when he'd moved to pull her into his arms, before she'd told him to leave
( ... )
[Private to Sasori]ground_breakerSeptember 24 2009, 05:33:34 UTC
[If there were any surer way to make her feel like her heart had been yanked out of her chest, she doesn't know what it would be.
Join the Akatsuki.
Join the Akatsuki.
He suggested she--]
No.
No, I wouldn't...
[He was trying to hurt her. Had to be. He was still bitter about the marriage or the rejection or both and he was saying the most injurious thing he could think of. That's all this was.
But it didn't stop it from burning all the way down through to her core.
Join the Akatsuki.
In a way, she had, hadn't she? Giving them information wasn't so different from standing in their ranks.
Ohgod.]
I wouldn't--
[Sakura shuts the feed off just before the tears fill her eyes.]
[Private to Sakura]eternalscorpionSeptember 24 2009, 07:43:13 UTC
[It frustrates Sasori to see Sakura like this. Even if he's no longer in love with her, seeing her suffering in this way still upsets him somewhat
( ... )
[Private to Sasori]ground_breakerSeptember 24 2009, 10:04:51 UTC
Stop it.
[She can't stand this. She can't bear to hear him attempt to console her like this, like a friend, like a lover (like he used to be).
She'd cried already but she knows it won't be the last time tonight, not by a long shot. There are tears in her eyes now and it takes every ounce of willpower she has not to let them go again.]
It’s all wrong because that never happened and Sakura never killed Kakashi and Sakura has only ever healed Naruto because Sakura always knows what she is doing and it’s all wrong and Naruto feels his jaw clench as Kakashi writhes and that is his sensei there on the ground and he thinks: help him even as she does not, even as she cannot. Even as she kills him.
And Sasuke on the ground has Naruto’s stomach twist so sharply that he tastes the bile in his throat and its all wrong-
Sakura would never-
Could never-
Sakura always knows what she is doing.
[Except for when someone else is pulling the strings.]
She never killed him and he can ignore his own face, the charred skin and the sick twinge of curiosity that wonders how often she thinks about him- them- like this, dead or dying, but she never killed any of them.
You didn’t kill us.
You didn’t kill us and he should not close his eyes but he does when he sees Madara. And he thinks: coward, then, but the thought is not directed at Sakura, it is directed at
( ... )
[ There was a lot that happened during the war that Gojyo wasn't aware of. There was a lot that happened before the war, too, and even further back, in the country everyone else comes from. There's a lot here - it's not just a nightmare about dead friends and violent enemies. But whatever secrets this dream is telling about Sakura's mind, they're her secrets, and none of his business.
His voice is gentle when he speaks... and for once, there's no tones of flirtation. ]
[ And it occurs to Gojyo suddenly that this might be the way it went down. He doesn't know. He has no clue what happened to Sakura, or Naruto, or Kakashi (beyond the kidnapping and fake beheading), or that other guy, Sasuke. He has absolutely no way of knowing if Sakura's healing chi somehow backfired and fried her friends. He doesn't know. ]
Just a dream, honey. It's not real. Turn it off an' get back to bed. You look beat.
[It's real enough for Sakura that all she'd get done by going back to bed is staring at the ceiling, turning this over and over on her head like a broken record.]
I don't think I can sleep.
[Really, sleeping is laughingly optimistic. She might've laughed if she could.]
Comments 71
...It's okay, since... D-dreams aren't real. So... Bad things in dreams are just pretend.
[A shy pause.]
A-and you helped my eyes. S-so it's not real.
Reply
But it may as well have.
These things could have happened. Could have happened, for all she knew, after she died.
Her betrayal is real. That's what matters.
But Chitose doesn't need to hear these things. She shouldn't have had to see it in the first place.]
You're right, Chitose-chan, they're not real.
Reply
Reply
There's something wrong when the person who invaded your village twice, who blew it up once, is right.
But he is. About everything.
She was incredibly foolish.
She did die a shinobi in battle but she betrayed her people too and she can't reconcile the two. The first doesn't matter in the face of the second. Maybe the first was punishment for the second. If it was, it wasn't enough.
Selling her soul, indeed.]
You're right.
[That's all she can say.]
Reply
Well, you have your life, despite my best efforts.
[ This is where he would smirk, if he ever did. ]
Your friend Naruto clearly respects you.
If you want to behave differently, then do so.
I learned from my own mistakes, but almost died for it.
And my own friends are all gone.
Not everyone has a second chance.
But what happens will happen, I suppose.
Reply
Reply
Join the Akatsuki.
Join the Akatsuki.
He suggested she--]
No.
No, I wouldn't...
[He was trying to hurt her. Had to be. He was still bitter about the marriage or the rejection or both and he was saying the most injurious thing he could think of. That's all this was.
But it didn't stop it from burning all the way down through to her core.
Join the Akatsuki.
In a way, she had, hadn't she? Giving them information wasn't so different from standing in their ranks.
Ohgod.]
I wouldn't--
[Sakura shuts the feed off just before the tears fill her eyes.]
Reply
Reply
[She can't stand this. She can't bear to hear him attempt to console her like this, like a friend, like a lover (like he used to be).
She'd cried already but she knows it won't be the last time tonight, not by a long shot. There are tears in her eyes now and it takes every ounce of willpower she has not to let them go again.]
Please... just stop.
Reply
It’s all wrong because that never happened and Sakura never killed Kakashi and Sakura has only ever healed Naruto because Sakura always knows what she is doing and it’s all wrong and Naruto feels his jaw clench as Kakashi writhes and that is his sensei there on the ground and he thinks: help him even as she does not, even as she cannot. Even as she kills him.
And Sasuke on the ground has Naruto’s stomach twist so sharply that he tastes the bile in his throat and its all wrong-
Sakura would never-
Could never-
Sakura always knows what she is doing.
[Except for when someone else is pulling the strings.]
She never killed him and he can ignore his own face, the charred skin and the sick twinge of curiosity that wonders how often she thinks about him- them- like this, dead or dying, but she never killed any of them.
You didn’t kill us.
You didn’t kill us and he should not close his eyes but he does when he sees Madara. And he thinks: coward, then, but the thought is not directed at Sakura, it is directed at ( ... )
Reply
His voice is gentle when he speaks... and for once, there's no tones of flirtation. ]
Hey. Sakura. ...Your Hitomi's on.
Reply
[There's no anything in Sakura's tone. No indignation, no fire, nothing. The nightmare gutted everything else.]
Reply
Just a dream, honey. It's not real. Turn it off an' get back to bed. You look beat.
Reply
I don't think I can sleep.
[Really, sleeping is laughingly optimistic. She might've laughed if she could.]
But thanks.
Reply
Leave a comment