Shay - Delphine AU | Part 19* (Rough Draft)
Could Shay and Delphine have been a thing in a different universe?
Prev: 1-5 (edited), 6-8, 9*, 10*, 11*, 12*, 13*, 14*, 15*, 16*, 17*, 18*, 19*
The day that Shay was introduced to Cosima, Delphine sent her a message late in the evening:
From Delphine [10:57]: I didn't mean to surprise you earlier. I didn't know one of the apartments Cosima wanted to see would be yours. We were there for such a short time, I didn't think we should bother you.
Shay contemplated the message as she brushed her teeth, then took up her phone after she toweled off her face.
To Delphine [11:03]: No need to apologize. I thought u dropped in and saw I wasn't home.
Shay bit her lower lip.
To Delphine [11:04]: Cosima wasn't what I expected a coworker of urs would look like.
From Delphine [11:05]: She is American. She relocated recently.
Shay laughed to herself.
To Delphine [11:06]: U realize not all Americans r like Cosima?
To Delphine [11:06]: Probably relatively few.
From Delphine [11:10]: Then what did you mean?
Shay's eyebrows flicked up in amusement.
To Delphine [11:11]: U kno, the dreadlocks, that whole look. I guess it doesn't seem very "scientist" to me.
From Delphine [11:12]: What should she look like then?
Shay paused, aware Delphine had cornered her into exposing the foolishness of her thinking. In the privacy of her apartment, she loosed a little grunt of annoyance.
To Delphine [11:13]: Alright. Sorry. I was being narrowminded.
From Delphine [11:13]: Would you say I look like a scientist?
To Delphine [11:14]: I said I was sorry!!!!
To Delphine [11:14]: Didn't u call me a hippie once?????
From Delphine [11:15]: To be precise, I thought you were a hippie. I would say it turned out to be an accurate assessment of your outlook in general.
Shay shook her head, put her phone aside, and climbed into bed. Fine. Whatever. She wasn't going to let Delphine derive any more pleasure at her expense on the subject. However, Delphine apparently wasn't finished because Shay's phone beeped a few minutes later.
From Delphine [11:20]: What did you think of Cosima?
Shay blinked. The change in topic was unexpected.
To Delphine [11:20]: I barely spoke to her.
From Delphine [11:21]: Your first impression.
To Delphine [11:21]: Didn't we have a whole convo about how first impressions aren't good measures of ppl?
From Delphine [11:22]: If I remember correctly, we talked about how first impressions are formed quickly. I think you had enough time to form a first impression. No?
To Delphine [11:23]: Is it weird that ur asking me for my first impression of ur coworker? I feel like that should be weird.
From Delphine [11:24]: Why? I already know you think she doesn't look like a scientist.
Shay sighed. The problem with trying to get around Delphine was that she was too intelligent and keen an observer to deter. It was also getting late.
To Delphine [11:25]: She seems nice.
From Delphine [11:26]: That's it?
To Delphine [11:26]: I talked to her for a minute.
To Delphine [11:27]: I feel like if anyone should have questions for anyone, I should be asking u questions.
From Delphine [11:27]: I wanted your opinion.
Shay stared at the words, undecided between feeling put out that she'd been derailed and touched that Delphine had so plainly solicited her thoughts. Contemplation of her bedspread resolved Shay to write:
To Delphine [11:29]: I was a little distracted.
To Delphine [11:29]: By you.
To Delphine [11:29]: U didn't seem comfortable.
To Delphine [11:30]: I didn't want to embarrass u.
From Delphine [11:30]: Embarrass me?
Shay let the question linger, unsure how to elaborate. That Delphine's closed expression and reticence had imposed on Shay a sense of caution. That she hadn't wanted to say something that Delphine wouldn't have wanted her to say--though she had no idea what that something might be. That in just the same way she hadn't wanted to take any action that Delphine didn't signal or initiate, like greet her or take her leave in the French manner that had become habitual between them.
From Delphine [11:35]: You did not embarrass me. I suspect I embarrassed myself in front of you.
Shay frowned at her screen.
To Delphine [11:36]: U didn't. Just worried me a little.
From Delphine [11:36]: Sorry.
From Delphine [11:36]: I didn't mean to.
From Delphine [11:36]: I had a lot on my mind.
To Delphine [11:37]: I understand. U usually do.
From Delphine [11:38]: Are you trying to tell me something?
To Delphine [11:38]: Yeah. Yoga and meditation would help with that.
From Delphine [11:39]: When will you give up?
To Delphine [11:39]: Never.
From Delphine [11:40]: Then it's best I quit while I'm ahead. Bonsoir.
Shay lifted an eyebrow at her screen. But she was smiling.
She hoped Delphine was, too.
To Delphine [11:40]: Goodnight.
*
A double parked moving truck impeding street traffic tended to herald the arrival or departure of a tenant. Shay peeked out of her window onto the scene as the truck's back door was slid open to reveal a puzzle-fit of manipulated boxes and furniture. A new tenant, then. Who stood a ways back on the sidewalk overseeing the ensuing debate as to how to best approach the offloading. Whom, Shay realized in a heartbeat, she recognized.
Shay slipped on a coat and headed outside.
"I guess you didn't have any questions?" she called out as she approached the impassive figure huddled with arms crossed against the chill.
Cosima turned toward the sound of Shay's voice, glanced offhandedly at her face, then did a double-take when she realized she'd been the addressee of Shay's question. Cosima smiled at her. "Hey."
"Hey yourself," Shay said. "You decided to move in?"
Cosima gestured at the truck. "Yup. Did you say something to me earlier? Wasn't really paying attention."
"I said I guess you didn't have any questions," Shay reiterated.
Cosima smiled, an inward-turned expression. "I didn't. Not any worth bothering you about. But I might have one now."
Shay smiled and said, with a laugh in her voice, "Isn't it a little late for that?"
Cosima craned her head to assume a sideways vantage point from which to study her. "You think it's too late to ask which unit you're in?"
At that Shay did laugh.
"You're here early," a voice said and they both turned to see Delphine approaching from up the street.
Cosima shrugged. "Had nowhere else to be, really."
"Hey," Shay greeted Delphine. "You're here to help?"
"Something like that," Delphine agreed.
"If you'd told me, I could have prepared iced tea or lemonade or something refreshing." Shay jerked her head in the direction of the movers. "Those guys will be thirsty soon."
Cosima's attention jerked back onto her, eyes narrowing.
"You'd have done that?" she asked just as Delphine said, "Just as well I didn't mention it then."
Cosima looked from Shay to Delphine and back again.
Shay cleared her throat. "Do you need help hauling things in?"
Cosima smiled. "I think the plan's more along the lines of supervising. About half of those boxes are just books--they'll throw your back out if you try to lift them. Better to leave it to the professionals, I think."
"That's why I switched to an e-reader," Shay said. "Saves space."
"Yeah? But there's nothing like the feel and smell of an actual book," rebutted Cosima.
"And there's nothing like the portability of having all your books at your fingertips on the go," Shay said. "But I know what you mean. You can't really 'flip' through an ebook." Shay smiled to herself. "Not that I have any reason to complain; my e-reader was a gift."
At the edge of her peripheral vision Shay could discern Delphine watching the two of them. When Shay snuck in a more direct glance, she found Delphine stone-faced, expression closed, but vigilant. A thought niggled, then blossomed into clarity: Shay had never seen Delphine look more "doctor"-like than in this moment, but exactly what quality lent the impression Shay wasn't sure. The passivity? The modulated distance? The cool assessment in her eyes?
Shay rubbed at her arms. "Are you guys going to stand out here watching the whole time?"
"I think there's probably going to be some standing inside watching, too," Cosima said.
"Well, if you want to come in . . ." Shay offered in vague terms.
"You didn't say which unit you're in," Cosima pointed out.
"Ground floor. Number 2."
"Second floor," Cosima said. "Number 13. Just follow all the noise and commotion and you'll find it."
Shay shook her head. "It's probably best to stay out of the way. Too many chefs in the kitchen and all that."
"Or in this case, movers," Cosima said, though there were only two movers, likely because there'd only been space for two in the truck, a driver and a passenger.
Shay turned to go back inside the building--she did have a few things to do--and caught Delphine's eyes behind Cosima's back. Her friend said nothing, but after a moment nodded.
Amid the spurts of ruckus emanating from the hall, the knock sounded upon Shay's door about thirty minutes later. Delphine stood on the other side, wearing a faint air of apology. "May I use your bathroom?"
"Of course," Shay said and let her in.
When Delphine emerged from the bathroom, Shay asked from the kitchen, "Are they getting thirsty yet? I can bring some water up."
Delphine joined her and hunched over the island, forearms balanced on the edge, fingers interlacing. She stared at her hands for a time, not answering Shay's question, then looked at Shay and spoke lowly. "Shay, be careful with Cosima."
"Whoa," Shay said, putting down the glass of water she'd poured for herself. "That doesn't sound at all ominous."
"I don't know her well," Delphine continued, earnest, eyes intent on Shay but somehow not intense, voice unwaveringly pitched to a soft timbre. "She told me only yesterday that she was moving into this complex."
Shay cocked her head. "Was there a reason she told you? That doesn't seem like something you need to tell your coworker."
"It is if you want to write it off as an expense."
Shay pursed her lips in a soundless whistle. "That's some perk."
Though not that different from what she heard the military offered service members, which made Shay wonder more about her friend's mysterious company. Delphine only nodded, shrugged, something along those lines of dismissal. "The company is generous."
"So you're not here to provide moral and friendly support?" Shay asked. Her forehead pinched in thought as she recreated the morning's tableau. "You didn't drive her, did you?"
Delphine shook her head in negation.
"Still not sure why you're warning me, though," Shay said carefully.
Delphine examined the far wall, perhaps reading the time on the analog clock. "That she chose an apartment here may not be coincidence."
Shay tapped the counter surface. "Well, you said she just moved, right?"
Delphine nodded.
"From the States? She might not know anyone here. She's probably just looking for people to get to know and, since we met briefly, maybe she thinks knowing someone in the building will make it easier to settle in."
Delphine studied Shay's face during a long, uninterrupted silence. At last she said, "Yes. It's possible."
Shay skirted on the edge of a frown. She and Delphine lived in separate worlds, Shay knew. Her own was open to Delphine, it was how they met, but Delphine's existed behind a closed door, heavy and sturdy and under the watch of a strict gatekeeper. "Are you feeling weirded out because Cosima is your coworker? You think I'm going to try to pry secrets out of her?"
The line of inquiry must have come at Delphine like an unseen right hook because she looked stunned for a moment. She shook it off and said, slowly, "It hadn't occurred to me, but I would appreciate it if you did not do that. Though I hope Cosima would know better." Delphine sucked at her lips. "But what I meant was that you should be careful."
Shay slipped on a frown in consternation. "Are you trying to tell me that I shouldn't be friends with Cosima?" Shay shook her head. "Which, by the way, seems a little premature."
Almost imperceptibly Delphine released a prolonged steady breath. "I'm not saying that. Whether you want to be friends with Cosima or not is your choice. And Cosima's."
Shay crossed her arms. "But you're making it sound like Cosima's dangerous."
Little to no reaction registered in Delphine's person in response to Shay's interpretation. Delphine held herself so still there was nothing to read in her body language. FInally, a twitch around her mouth suggested a grimace. "It's complicated." Then, as if making a confession, Delphine added, "I'm her supervisor."
"Ah," intoned Shay, as if that provided plausible explanation, but upon further inspection, Shay wasn't so sure it did. "What are you worried about? That she's going to complain to me about you?"
Delphine cracked the first effort at a smile. "I'm not worried about that--I'm pretty certain that's what she'll do."
"I'll defend your honor," Shay assured her. "If it's deserved."
"Thank you," said Delphine drily. It was the closest to a return to usual form that Shay had seen yet. It was short-lived. Softness rebound Delphine's voice, lending an air of resignation to her words. "I know you will be you. Just . . ."
"Be careful?" Shay finished. "It would help to know what I'm supposed to be careful about."
Delphine gave her a tired smile. "I don't know, exactly. It's just a feeling."
On her last word, a crash and startled shouts reverberated through the hall that made them both jump and whirl toward the door. They exchanged wide-eyed, uncertain looks.
"We should probably make sure everyone's alright," Shay said.
"Yes," Delphine agreed.
In the hall was a lake spill of books, mostly hardcover volumes, many in good and matching leather bindings, the box that had torn beneath their collective weight still in the arms of one of the hapless movers.
"She wasn't kidding about the books," Shay muttered, almost appreciative. In the subsequent scramble to clear the mess and then being whisked into the moving effort, Shay and Delphine found no more time to continue their discussion.
*
With the moving truck emptied--double-checked by a quick walkthrough for anything that might have fallen out or rolled about the trailer--paperwork signed--by Delphine, who reviewed the forms and slipped the copy of the receipt into her purse--the movers sent on their way--with one last glass of water each, a courtesy that had Shay acutely aware of how the younger of the two movers, easily younger than herself, smiled at her shyly and awkwardly tried to avoid brushing her hand in accepting the glass and stammered a bashful thank you during which he avoided her eyes (and why her and not Cosima or Delphine, who were both attractive women in their own right--but then maybe it had to be Shay when there was something wild and unpredictable about Cosima's appearance, in that choice of dreadlocks in combination with a form-clinging dress and flowy scarves, while something else altogether intimidating and austere seemed instilled in the manner of beauty that touched Delphine's features)--and the apartment upstairs furnished haphazardly with transplanted lamps and nightstands and chairs (but no couch, Shay noted, though the upright chairs were stuffed to plumpness) and bed frame and mattress, the items that along with the desk had given them the most trouble in maneuvering into their new home, bare of sheets that lurked unlocated in one of many unopened boxes strewn and piled about, the three of them stood in the not-empty-but-not-yet-filled space and Shay, holding two drinking glasses to convey back downstairs, said, "Is anyone hungry?"
"Yes," said Cosima.
Delphine said nothing.
But the three of them together transported themselves down via elevator--a little silly, Shay thought, as she would have taken the stairs if she'd been alone, but they'd all automatically headed for the conveyance, having ridden it countless times already that day--to Shay's apartment to drop off used glasses, during which Shay explained that there were a few dining establishments within walking distance, but far more options existed within just ten, fifteen minutes of driving. "We're actually close to Little Italy if you want to do pasta or pizza. It's a few blocks north of here." Shay retrieved her coat. "There are even a few Japanese places--and a Vietnamese restaurant if you like that."
"I'm down for anything," Cosima proclaimed.
"There are a few restaurants I prefer," Shay admitted, "since there are more options for a pescetarian."
"Yeah?" Cosima said, brightening. She placed a hand on her chest. "Mostly vegetarian."
"Mostly?" Shay asked, slinging her purse upon her shoulder.
They shuffled out into the hall.
"I do chicken sometimes," Cosima said, "but I'm not really into beef or pork. Fish is okay but I don't miss it."
Shay locked the door, smiling to herself. "There are lots of fish that are good for you."
"Sure, but what about the concentrations of mercury that accumulate in them?" Cosima retorted. Behind her, Delphine tilted her head, as if debating on agreement or disagreement with her fellow scientist. No, that wasn't it. Delphine most likely agreed, if the evidence existed to corroborate the claim; what Shay imagined she might be debating was voicing that agreement.
Which wasn't a debate Shay had ever before imagined Delphine to conduct with herself.
They trooped out into the brisk day. The sun beat down weakly against a chill factor that whipped at their clothes and seemed to insinuate through seams of their clothing.
"Should I drive?" Shay asked, hunching in her coat and looking to Delphine.
"Your car is small," Delphine said.
"It can hold three people," Shay declared, defensive.
"I'll drive," Delphine said placidly. "You can navigate."
On the walk to Delphine's car a block over, they settled on pizza for a late-lunch-slash-early-dinner, as if by mentioning it earlier Shay had planted a craving. Well. Shay and Cosima settled on pizza. Delphine offered nothing by way of argument or agreement, but when they piled into the car--Shay in the passenger seat by unspoken understanding, to facilitate navigating, and Cosima in the back behind Shay, though sometimes she shifted to sit more on the center hump, disdainful of the seatbelt--Delphine blasted the heat, eased into traffic, and took the streets and turns Shay indicated.
The time they arrived at the restaurant suspended them between the hectic lunchtime and dinnertime rushes. They had their pick of a table and then their pick of toppings, huddled around a single menu, which caused a cascade of deliberation that transpired like a survey on:
Onions:
Shay, "It doesn't really matter to me."
Cosima, "Do you like them raw or cooked? Because have you noticed that sometimes with pizza you get them almost between those two states? Not crisp but not soggy."
Delphine abstained from comment.
Basil:
Shay, "I love basil on pizza."
Cosima, "I could go for basil."
Delphine abstained from comment.
Mushrooms:
Shay, "You know what surprises me a little? The number of vegetarians who don't like mushrooms."
Cosima, "Well . . . I'm not that big on mushrooms. I can eat them. I know some people who like mushrooms because they have that, like, almost meaty texture? Which, I think if you're framing it like that, seems a little sad."
Delphine abstained from comment.
Artichoke:
Shay, "I love artichokes, but not so much on my pizza. Actually, now that I think about it, I'm not sure I've ever had it on pizza. I think my gut reaction is just because it's not a topping I associate with going on pizza."
Cosima, "I'm not sure I care either way. I've had it on pizza. It's good. How do you usually eat artichokes?"
Delphine abstained from comment.
Eggplant:
Shay, "Again, not really something I imagine on my pizza. Eggplant parmesan is delicious, though."
Cosima, "I don't think I've ever had eggplant on pizza, but I agree about the parmesan."
Delphine abstained from comment.
Zucchini:
Shay, "Have you ever had zucchini bread?"
Cosima, "Does it taste like zucchini?"
Delphine abstained from comment.
Green peppers:
Shay, "Yes."
Cosima, "Agreed. If we go with the green peppers, I think we should go with the onions, too."
Delphine nodded.
Extra mozzarella and other assorted cheeses:
Shay, "I'm all for cheese, but on pizza sometimes I like more, sometimes I don't. I don't like it when they place big slices of cheese in random spots and it doesn't really melt. Or you just get those patches."
Cosima, "I like cheese, but I don't love cheese. I'm fine with the usual level of cheese."
Delphine abstained from comment.
Sun dried tomatoes:
Shay, "Oh, yes, please."
Cosima, "Alright."
Delphine might have smiled.
Olives:
Shay, "I like olives."
Cosima, "So do I."
Delphine, "How many toppings usually go on one pizza?"
Anchovies:
Shay, "I'm okay with them."
Cosima, "Not really in the mood."
Delphine, looking at Cosima, "Yes, probably best to avoid those levels of salt."
Which was, really, the only opinion Delphine offered on the entirety of the pizza affair--and it didn't have much to do with the pizza itself. They wrangled out an order and settled into that potential awkward phase of waiting for food to arrive with nothing to occupy hands or mouths. Tucked among the salt, pepper, and parmesan cheese shakers was a beverage menu. Cosima plucked it out to examine the wine portion. Shay felt it was too early for wine, but they perused the list in a hypothetical manner.
"Do you have a preference?" Cosima asked, flipping the placard over.
"Whites," Shay said.
Cosima nodded. "I'll drink either, but I prefer red."
Shay smiled to herself and caught Delphine's eyes. "I guess I'm outnumbered, then."
Cosima glanced over at Delphine, considering, eyes within the confines of bold eyeliner shrewd, but the two didn't quite acknowledge the other.
From there it was hard not to notice two things: That Cosima addressed conversation almost exclusively to her and that Delphine barely made a peep. Such behavior made sense in certain contexts, such as when Shay cautioned Cosima about the high use times of the laundry room--"Tuesday is probably the quietest day, but try not to forget about your clothes. The one or two times I've done it, I lost a sock--and I feel like that wasn't a lapse on my part, but that maybe someone was trying to send me a message." "Like as a punishment? That's pretty harsh." "Right? I hate losing socks. I didn't even leave my clothes in the machine for that long. I was so annoyed"--but Shay found less room for excuse in the light of other topics, as when Cosima related the hazards of what you might find deposited in a communal laboratory refrigerator. Shay looked to Delphine for confirmation--or, she hoped, elaboration--and received a small shrug that seemed to confirm the possibility but could have just as probably been a dismissal of a tall tale.
All of which, considered together, stymied Shay. It was one thing for Delphine to say she didn't know Cosima well, but another issue altogether if Delphine made no effort to engage Cosima whatsoever. Granted, Cosima didn't appear to be reaching out to Delphine either, which was the other thing that bothered Shay upon reflection: Cosima, all throughout the meal, proved an adroit, smooth conversationalist--interesting, funny, curious, well read, smart, willing to fill in silences, equipped with anecdotes to spare. Between bites of thin crust, marinara sauce, and steaming, stretchy cheese that threatened first degree burns, Shay learned summarily that Cosima was from the North Bay Area of California ("You grew up along the coast and you don't like fish?" "Dude, not all fish are created equal on the culinary scale. Fish tacos? Almost always delicious. Salmon filets? Better as sashimi than grilled. It's so dry, you know what I mean?"), had moved to Toronto from Minnesota ("Aw, man, I was not ready for a winter like that." "I don't want to scare you, but . . ."), and had been studying a field she shortened to "evo-devo" ("That sounds like the evil version of the band Devo. Evil Devo." "Whip it bad?").
Delphine listened, watched, and nibbled on a slice of pizza.
Despite the fact that Shay knew, through now long repeated exposure, what an engaging conversationalist Delphine herself was.
More than Shay cared to admit, Delphine's silence bothered her.
There was maybe one other thing that demanded note: Cosima had a cough that wouldn't quit.
Shay had heard it throughout the day, here and there, while they'd curried objects into the apartment, little fits that Cosima snuffled away or punctuated with a clearing of her throat. Throughout the meal Cosima kept her glass of water close at hand and a napkin within ready grasp. The onset of one particularly robust bout had Cosima excuse herself and make for the bathroom.
Shay watched her disappear around a corner, then turned to Delphine. "You okay?"
"What do you mean?" Delphine asked.
Shay decided to interpret that as an earnest question. "You've been quiet this whole time. You could try talking to her, get to know her."
Delphine held her gaze for a second, then ducked her head and wiped at a spot of flour on the table. "We talk. At work."
Shay leaned forward, voice falling in volume. "Am I missing something? Just because you're her boss doesn't mean you can't be her friend." The word "friend" brought a memory bubbling up. "Wait. Is Cosima the one--"
Movement cut off her question. Shay relaxed in her seat as Cosima rejoined them. She scanned Cosima's face.
"You okay?" Shay asked and felt a bizarre moment of self-consciousness when she realized she'd lobbed the exact same question at Delphine.
Cosima smiled and waved off Shay's concern. "Yeah, fine, fine. It's just--this cough. It's, uh, sticking around."
Shay nodded. "You know, licorice could help with that."
Cosima arched an eyebrow at her.
"You steep the root like a tea. It's sweet. I can give you some when we get back," Shay offered. Delphine shifted in her seat, sitting up straighter, perhaps stretching her spine.
Cosima cleared her throat and took a sip of water. "Any side effects?"
Shay considered. "Do you have high blood pressure?"
In a movement that looked reflexive, Cosima glanced at Delphine. It was just a second and didn't raise a reaction from Delphine. "I think I'm good."
"In large doses or with prolonged use, licorice can raise blood pressure," Shay clarified.
"Does it act as a suppressant or expectorant?" Delphine asked, without warning.
"I'm not sure," Shay admitted, almost startled into answering at the unexpectedness of Delphine's participation.
"Then you might want to hold off," Delphine said, speaking softly, but decidedly to Cosima, "or try it in small doses."
Shay spread her hands. "If your cough has been chronic, you'll probably want to consult a physician."
Her remark elicited brief, startled looks from both Cosima and Delphine, who then exchanged glances with one another.
"Yeah," Cosima said, slow, drawn out, returning her attention to Shay. "I'll keep that in mind." In a moment her eyes acquired a sparkle. "Did you notice there was tiramisu on the menu? What do you say?"
Shay contemplated her companions. Then she said yes, because she'd seen the tiramisu on the menu and that's what she could say to dessert. Not always, perhaps, but to mark a special occasion, of course.
Cosima smiled in delight at her answer.
*
Delphine dropped off Shay and Cosima in front of the apartment building and did not come in, though Shay wished she would, entreated her with a silent look to come inside, maybe so that the two of them could talk. There was a second where Delphine looked uncertain, like she might capitulate, but then she made an excuse about weekend chores and offered a halfhearted smile touched with apology.
In the hall Shay and Cosima went their separate ways, though it was almost like Cosima dropped her off at her door, drifting away but lingering to make sure Shay made it inside.
Once ensconced in her apartment, Shay considered her phone. She had a desire to send something to Delphine. A question. A comment. A string of question marks to encapsulate the mystification Delphine had left her with. But nothing sounded innocuous and everything seemed invasive and Shay didn't know what she wanted to know, anyway.
It had been a strange day spent with strangers.
One had come to her as a full-fledged unknown entity, but the other had revealed herself as unfathomable and unpredictable as the former before Shay's eyes.
//
Next
Prev: 1-5 (edited), 6-8, 9*, 10*, 11*, 12*, 13*, 14*, 15*, 16*, 17*, 18*, 19*
The day that Shay was introduced to Cosima, Delphine sent her a message late in the evening:
From Delphine [10:57]: I didn't mean to surprise you earlier. I didn't know one of the apartments Cosima wanted to see would be yours. We were there for such a short time, I didn't think we should bother you.
Shay contemplated the message as she brushed her teeth, then took up her phone after she toweled off her face.
To Delphine [11:03]: No need to apologize. I thought u dropped in and saw I wasn't home.
Shay bit her lower lip.
To Delphine [11:04]: Cosima wasn't what I expected a coworker of urs would look like.
From Delphine [11:05]: She is American. She relocated recently.
Shay laughed to herself.
To Delphine [11:06]: U realize not all Americans r like Cosima?
To Delphine [11:06]: Probably relatively few.
From Delphine [11:10]: Then what did you mean?
Shay's eyebrows flicked up in amusement.
To Delphine [11:11]: U kno, the dreadlocks, that whole look. I guess it doesn't seem very "scientist" to me.
From Delphine [11:12]: What should she look like then?
Shay paused, aware Delphine had cornered her into exposing the foolishness of her thinking. In the privacy of her apartment, she loosed a little grunt of annoyance.
To Delphine [11:13]: Alright. Sorry. I was being narrowminded.
From Delphine [11:13]: Would you say I look like a scientist?
To Delphine [11:14]: I said I was sorry!!!!
To Delphine [11:14]: Didn't u call me a hippie once?????
From Delphine [11:15]: To be precise, I thought you were a hippie. I would say it turned out to be an accurate assessment of your outlook in general.
Shay shook her head, put her phone aside, and climbed into bed. Fine. Whatever. She wasn't going to let Delphine derive any more pleasure at her expense on the subject. However, Delphine apparently wasn't finished because Shay's phone beeped a few minutes later.
From Delphine [11:20]: What did you think of Cosima?
Shay blinked. The change in topic was unexpected.
To Delphine [11:20]: I barely spoke to her.
From Delphine [11:21]: Your first impression.
To Delphine [11:21]: Didn't we have a whole convo about how first impressions aren't good measures of ppl?
From Delphine [11:22]: If I remember correctly, we talked about how first impressions are formed quickly. I think you had enough time to form a first impression. No?
To Delphine [11:23]: Is it weird that ur asking me for my first impression of ur coworker? I feel like that should be weird.
From Delphine [11:24]: Why? I already know you think she doesn't look like a scientist.
Shay sighed. The problem with trying to get around Delphine was that she was too intelligent and keen an observer to deter. It was also getting late.
To Delphine [11:25]: She seems nice.
From Delphine [11:26]: That's it?
To Delphine [11:26]: I talked to her for a minute.
To Delphine [11:27]: I feel like if anyone should have questions for anyone, I should be asking u questions.
From Delphine [11:27]: I wanted your opinion.
Shay stared at the words, undecided between feeling put out that she'd been derailed and touched that Delphine had so plainly solicited her thoughts. Contemplation of her bedspread resolved Shay to write:
To Delphine [11:29]: I was a little distracted.
To Delphine [11:29]: By you.
To Delphine [11:29]: U didn't seem comfortable.
To Delphine [11:30]: I didn't want to embarrass u.
From Delphine [11:30]: Embarrass me?
Shay let the question linger, unsure how to elaborate. That Delphine's closed expression and reticence had imposed on Shay a sense of caution. That she hadn't wanted to say something that Delphine wouldn't have wanted her to say--though she had no idea what that something might be. That in just the same way she hadn't wanted to take any action that Delphine didn't signal or initiate, like greet her or take her leave in the French manner that had become habitual between them.
From Delphine [11:35]: You did not embarrass me. I suspect I embarrassed myself in front of you.
Shay frowned at her screen.
To Delphine [11:36]: U didn't. Just worried me a little.
From Delphine [11:36]: Sorry.
From Delphine [11:36]: I didn't mean to.
From Delphine [11:36]: I had a lot on my mind.
To Delphine [11:37]: I understand. U usually do.
From Delphine [11:38]: Are you trying to tell me something?
To Delphine [11:38]: Yeah. Yoga and meditation would help with that.
From Delphine [11:39]: When will you give up?
To Delphine [11:39]: Never.
From Delphine [11:40]: Then it's best I quit while I'm ahead. Bonsoir.
Shay lifted an eyebrow at her screen. But she was smiling.
She hoped Delphine was, too.
To Delphine [11:40]: Goodnight.
*
A double parked moving truck impeding street traffic tended to herald the arrival or departure of a tenant. Shay peeked out of her window onto the scene as the truck's back door was slid open to reveal a puzzle-fit of manipulated boxes and furniture. A new tenant, then. Who stood a ways back on the sidewalk overseeing the ensuing debate as to how to best approach the offloading. Whom, Shay realized in a heartbeat, she recognized.
Shay slipped on a coat and headed outside.
"I guess you didn't have any questions?" she called out as she approached the impassive figure huddled with arms crossed against the chill.
Cosima turned toward the sound of Shay's voice, glanced offhandedly at her face, then did a double-take when she realized she'd been the addressee of Shay's question. Cosima smiled at her. "Hey."
"Hey yourself," Shay said. "You decided to move in?"
Cosima gestured at the truck. "Yup. Did you say something to me earlier? Wasn't really paying attention."
"I said I guess you didn't have any questions," Shay reiterated.
Cosima smiled, an inward-turned expression. "I didn't. Not any worth bothering you about. But I might have one now."
Shay smiled and said, with a laugh in her voice, "Isn't it a little late for that?"
Cosima craned her head to assume a sideways vantage point from which to study her. "You think it's too late to ask which unit you're in?"
At that Shay did laugh.
"You're here early," a voice said and they both turned to see Delphine approaching from up the street.
Cosima shrugged. "Had nowhere else to be, really."
"Hey," Shay greeted Delphine. "You're here to help?"
"Something like that," Delphine agreed.
"If you'd told me, I could have prepared iced tea or lemonade or something refreshing." Shay jerked her head in the direction of the movers. "Those guys will be thirsty soon."
Cosima's attention jerked back onto her, eyes narrowing.
"You'd have done that?" she asked just as Delphine said, "Just as well I didn't mention it then."
Cosima looked from Shay to Delphine and back again.
Shay cleared her throat. "Do you need help hauling things in?"
Cosima smiled. "I think the plan's more along the lines of supervising. About half of those boxes are just books--they'll throw your back out if you try to lift them. Better to leave it to the professionals, I think."
"That's why I switched to an e-reader," Shay said. "Saves space."
"Yeah? But there's nothing like the feel and smell of an actual book," rebutted Cosima.
"And there's nothing like the portability of having all your books at your fingertips on the go," Shay said. "But I know what you mean. You can't really 'flip' through an ebook." Shay smiled to herself. "Not that I have any reason to complain; my e-reader was a gift."
At the edge of her peripheral vision Shay could discern Delphine watching the two of them. When Shay snuck in a more direct glance, she found Delphine stone-faced, expression closed, but vigilant. A thought niggled, then blossomed into clarity: Shay had never seen Delphine look more "doctor"-like than in this moment, but exactly what quality lent the impression Shay wasn't sure. The passivity? The modulated distance? The cool assessment in her eyes?
Shay rubbed at her arms. "Are you guys going to stand out here watching the whole time?"
"I think there's probably going to be some standing inside watching, too," Cosima said.
"Well, if you want to come in . . ." Shay offered in vague terms.
"You didn't say which unit you're in," Cosima pointed out.
"Ground floor. Number 2."
"Second floor," Cosima said. "Number 13. Just follow all the noise and commotion and you'll find it."
Shay shook her head. "It's probably best to stay out of the way. Too many chefs in the kitchen and all that."
"Or in this case, movers," Cosima said, though there were only two movers, likely because there'd only been space for two in the truck, a driver and a passenger.
Shay turned to go back inside the building--she did have a few things to do--and caught Delphine's eyes behind Cosima's back. Her friend said nothing, but after a moment nodded.
Amid the spurts of ruckus emanating from the hall, the knock sounded upon Shay's door about thirty minutes later. Delphine stood on the other side, wearing a faint air of apology. "May I use your bathroom?"
"Of course," Shay said and let her in.
When Delphine emerged from the bathroom, Shay asked from the kitchen, "Are they getting thirsty yet? I can bring some water up."
Delphine joined her and hunched over the island, forearms balanced on the edge, fingers interlacing. She stared at her hands for a time, not answering Shay's question, then looked at Shay and spoke lowly. "Shay, be careful with Cosima."
"Whoa," Shay said, putting down the glass of water she'd poured for herself. "That doesn't sound at all ominous."
"I don't know her well," Delphine continued, earnest, eyes intent on Shay but somehow not intense, voice unwaveringly pitched to a soft timbre. "She told me only yesterday that she was moving into this complex."
Shay cocked her head. "Was there a reason she told you? That doesn't seem like something you need to tell your coworker."
"It is if you want to write it off as an expense."
Shay pursed her lips in a soundless whistle. "That's some perk."
Though not that different from what she heard the military offered service members, which made Shay wonder more about her friend's mysterious company. Delphine only nodded, shrugged, something along those lines of dismissal. "The company is generous."
"So you're not here to provide moral and friendly support?" Shay asked. Her forehead pinched in thought as she recreated the morning's tableau. "You didn't drive her, did you?"
Delphine shook her head in negation.
"Still not sure why you're warning me, though," Shay said carefully.
Delphine examined the far wall, perhaps reading the time on the analog clock. "That she chose an apartment here may not be coincidence."
Shay tapped the counter surface. "Well, you said she just moved, right?"
Delphine nodded.
"From the States? She might not know anyone here. She's probably just looking for people to get to know and, since we met briefly, maybe she thinks knowing someone in the building will make it easier to settle in."
Delphine studied Shay's face during a long, uninterrupted silence. At last she said, "Yes. It's possible."
Shay skirted on the edge of a frown. She and Delphine lived in separate worlds, Shay knew. Her own was open to Delphine, it was how they met, but Delphine's existed behind a closed door, heavy and sturdy and under the watch of a strict gatekeeper. "Are you feeling weirded out because Cosima is your coworker? You think I'm going to try to pry secrets out of her?"
The line of inquiry must have come at Delphine like an unseen right hook because she looked stunned for a moment. She shook it off and said, slowly, "It hadn't occurred to me, but I would appreciate it if you did not do that. Though I hope Cosima would know better." Delphine sucked at her lips. "But what I meant was that you should be careful."
Shay slipped on a frown in consternation. "Are you trying to tell me that I shouldn't be friends with Cosima?" Shay shook her head. "Which, by the way, seems a little premature."
Almost imperceptibly Delphine released a prolonged steady breath. "I'm not saying that. Whether you want to be friends with Cosima or not is your choice. And Cosima's."
Shay crossed her arms. "But you're making it sound like Cosima's dangerous."
Little to no reaction registered in Delphine's person in response to Shay's interpretation. Delphine held herself so still there was nothing to read in her body language. FInally, a twitch around her mouth suggested a grimace. "It's complicated." Then, as if making a confession, Delphine added, "I'm her supervisor."
"Ah," intoned Shay, as if that provided plausible explanation, but upon further inspection, Shay wasn't so sure it did. "What are you worried about? That she's going to complain to me about you?"
Delphine cracked the first effort at a smile. "I'm not worried about that--I'm pretty certain that's what she'll do."
"I'll defend your honor," Shay assured her. "If it's deserved."
"Thank you," said Delphine drily. It was the closest to a return to usual form that Shay had seen yet. It was short-lived. Softness rebound Delphine's voice, lending an air of resignation to her words. "I know you will be you. Just . . ."
"Be careful?" Shay finished. "It would help to know what I'm supposed to be careful about."
Delphine gave her a tired smile. "I don't know, exactly. It's just a feeling."
On her last word, a crash and startled shouts reverberated through the hall that made them both jump and whirl toward the door. They exchanged wide-eyed, uncertain looks.
"We should probably make sure everyone's alright," Shay said.
"Yes," Delphine agreed.
In the hall was a lake spill of books, mostly hardcover volumes, many in good and matching leather bindings, the box that had torn beneath their collective weight still in the arms of one of the hapless movers.
"She wasn't kidding about the books," Shay muttered, almost appreciative. In the subsequent scramble to clear the mess and then being whisked into the moving effort, Shay and Delphine found no more time to continue their discussion.
*
With the moving truck emptied--double-checked by a quick walkthrough for anything that might have fallen out or rolled about the trailer--paperwork signed--by Delphine, who reviewed the forms and slipped the copy of the receipt into her purse--the movers sent on their way--with one last glass of water each, a courtesy that had Shay acutely aware of how the younger of the two movers, easily younger than herself, smiled at her shyly and awkwardly tried to avoid brushing her hand in accepting the glass and stammered a bashful thank you during which he avoided her eyes (and why her and not Cosima or Delphine, who were both attractive women in their own right--but then maybe it had to be Shay when there was something wild and unpredictable about Cosima's appearance, in that choice of dreadlocks in combination with a form-clinging dress and flowy scarves, while something else altogether intimidating and austere seemed instilled in the manner of beauty that touched Delphine's features)--and the apartment upstairs furnished haphazardly with transplanted lamps and nightstands and chairs (but no couch, Shay noted, though the upright chairs were stuffed to plumpness) and bed frame and mattress, the items that along with the desk had given them the most trouble in maneuvering into their new home, bare of sheets that lurked unlocated in one of many unopened boxes strewn and piled about, the three of them stood in the not-empty-but-not-yet-filled space and Shay, holding two drinking glasses to convey back downstairs, said, "Is anyone hungry?"
"Yes," said Cosima.
Delphine said nothing.
But the three of them together transported themselves down via elevator--a little silly, Shay thought, as she would have taken the stairs if she'd been alone, but they'd all automatically headed for the conveyance, having ridden it countless times already that day--to Shay's apartment to drop off used glasses, during which Shay explained that there were a few dining establishments within walking distance, but far more options existed within just ten, fifteen minutes of driving. "We're actually close to Little Italy if you want to do pasta or pizza. It's a few blocks north of here." Shay retrieved her coat. "There are even a few Japanese places--and a Vietnamese restaurant if you like that."
"I'm down for anything," Cosima proclaimed.
"There are a few restaurants I prefer," Shay admitted, "since there are more options for a pescetarian."
"Yeah?" Cosima said, brightening. She placed a hand on her chest. "Mostly vegetarian."
"Mostly?" Shay asked, slinging her purse upon her shoulder.
They shuffled out into the hall.
"I do chicken sometimes," Cosima said, "but I'm not really into beef or pork. Fish is okay but I don't miss it."
Shay locked the door, smiling to herself. "There are lots of fish that are good for you."
"Sure, but what about the concentrations of mercury that accumulate in them?" Cosima retorted. Behind her, Delphine tilted her head, as if debating on agreement or disagreement with her fellow scientist. No, that wasn't it. Delphine most likely agreed, if the evidence existed to corroborate the claim; what Shay imagined she might be debating was voicing that agreement.
Which wasn't a debate Shay had ever before imagined Delphine to conduct with herself.
They trooped out into the brisk day. The sun beat down weakly against a chill factor that whipped at their clothes and seemed to insinuate through seams of their clothing.
"Should I drive?" Shay asked, hunching in her coat and looking to Delphine.
"Your car is small," Delphine said.
"It can hold three people," Shay declared, defensive.
"I'll drive," Delphine said placidly. "You can navigate."
On the walk to Delphine's car a block over, they settled on pizza for a late-lunch-slash-early-dinner, as if by mentioning it earlier Shay had planted a craving. Well. Shay and Cosima settled on pizza. Delphine offered nothing by way of argument or agreement, but when they piled into the car--Shay in the passenger seat by unspoken understanding, to facilitate navigating, and Cosima in the back behind Shay, though sometimes she shifted to sit more on the center hump, disdainful of the seatbelt--Delphine blasted the heat, eased into traffic, and took the streets and turns Shay indicated.
The time they arrived at the restaurant suspended them between the hectic lunchtime and dinnertime rushes. They had their pick of a table and then their pick of toppings, huddled around a single menu, which caused a cascade of deliberation that transpired like a survey on:
Onions:
Shay, "It doesn't really matter to me."
Cosima, "Do you like them raw or cooked? Because have you noticed that sometimes with pizza you get them almost between those two states? Not crisp but not soggy."
Delphine abstained from comment.
Basil:
Shay, "I love basil on pizza."
Cosima, "I could go for basil."
Delphine abstained from comment.
Mushrooms:
Shay, "You know what surprises me a little? The number of vegetarians who don't like mushrooms."
Cosima, "Well . . . I'm not that big on mushrooms. I can eat them. I know some people who like mushrooms because they have that, like, almost meaty texture? Which, I think if you're framing it like that, seems a little sad."
Delphine abstained from comment.
Artichoke:
Shay, "I love artichokes, but not so much on my pizza. Actually, now that I think about it, I'm not sure I've ever had it on pizza. I think my gut reaction is just because it's not a topping I associate with going on pizza."
Cosima, "I'm not sure I care either way. I've had it on pizza. It's good. How do you usually eat artichokes?"
Delphine abstained from comment.
Eggplant:
Shay, "Again, not really something I imagine on my pizza. Eggplant parmesan is delicious, though."
Cosima, "I don't think I've ever had eggplant on pizza, but I agree about the parmesan."
Delphine abstained from comment.
Zucchini:
Shay, "Have you ever had zucchini bread?"
Cosima, "Does it taste like zucchini?"
Delphine abstained from comment.
Green peppers:
Shay, "Yes."
Cosima, "Agreed. If we go with the green peppers, I think we should go with the onions, too."
Delphine nodded.
Extra mozzarella and other assorted cheeses:
Shay, "I'm all for cheese, but on pizza sometimes I like more, sometimes I don't. I don't like it when they place big slices of cheese in random spots and it doesn't really melt. Or you just get those patches."
Cosima, "I like cheese, but I don't love cheese. I'm fine with the usual level of cheese."
Delphine abstained from comment.
Sun dried tomatoes:
Shay, "Oh, yes, please."
Cosima, "Alright."
Delphine might have smiled.
Olives:
Shay, "I like olives."
Cosima, "So do I."
Delphine, "How many toppings usually go on one pizza?"
Anchovies:
Shay, "I'm okay with them."
Cosima, "Not really in the mood."
Delphine, looking at Cosima, "Yes, probably best to avoid those levels of salt."
Which was, really, the only opinion Delphine offered on the entirety of the pizza affair--and it didn't have much to do with the pizza itself. They wrangled out an order and settled into that potential awkward phase of waiting for food to arrive with nothing to occupy hands or mouths. Tucked among the salt, pepper, and parmesan cheese shakers was a beverage menu. Cosima plucked it out to examine the wine portion. Shay felt it was too early for wine, but they perused the list in a hypothetical manner.
"Do you have a preference?" Cosima asked, flipping the placard over.
"Whites," Shay said.
Cosima nodded. "I'll drink either, but I prefer red."
Shay smiled to herself and caught Delphine's eyes. "I guess I'm outnumbered, then."
Cosima glanced over at Delphine, considering, eyes within the confines of bold eyeliner shrewd, but the two didn't quite acknowledge the other.
From there it was hard not to notice two things: That Cosima addressed conversation almost exclusively to her and that Delphine barely made a peep. Such behavior made sense in certain contexts, such as when Shay cautioned Cosima about the high use times of the laundry room--"Tuesday is probably the quietest day, but try not to forget about your clothes. The one or two times I've done it, I lost a sock--and I feel like that wasn't a lapse on my part, but that maybe someone was trying to send me a message." "Like as a punishment? That's pretty harsh." "Right? I hate losing socks. I didn't even leave my clothes in the machine for that long. I was so annoyed"--but Shay found less room for excuse in the light of other topics, as when Cosima related the hazards of what you might find deposited in a communal laboratory refrigerator. Shay looked to Delphine for confirmation--or, she hoped, elaboration--and received a small shrug that seemed to confirm the possibility but could have just as probably been a dismissal of a tall tale.
All of which, considered together, stymied Shay. It was one thing for Delphine to say she didn't know Cosima well, but another issue altogether if Delphine made no effort to engage Cosima whatsoever. Granted, Cosima didn't appear to be reaching out to Delphine either, which was the other thing that bothered Shay upon reflection: Cosima, all throughout the meal, proved an adroit, smooth conversationalist--interesting, funny, curious, well read, smart, willing to fill in silences, equipped with anecdotes to spare. Between bites of thin crust, marinara sauce, and steaming, stretchy cheese that threatened first degree burns, Shay learned summarily that Cosima was from the North Bay Area of California ("You grew up along the coast and you don't like fish?" "Dude, not all fish are created equal on the culinary scale. Fish tacos? Almost always delicious. Salmon filets? Better as sashimi than grilled. It's so dry, you know what I mean?"), had moved to Toronto from Minnesota ("Aw, man, I was not ready for a winter like that." "I don't want to scare you, but . . ."), and had been studying a field she shortened to "evo-devo" ("That sounds like the evil version of the band Devo. Evil Devo." "Whip it bad?").
Delphine listened, watched, and nibbled on a slice of pizza.
Despite the fact that Shay knew, through now long repeated exposure, what an engaging conversationalist Delphine herself was.
More than Shay cared to admit, Delphine's silence bothered her.
There was maybe one other thing that demanded note: Cosima had a cough that wouldn't quit.
Shay had heard it throughout the day, here and there, while they'd curried objects into the apartment, little fits that Cosima snuffled away or punctuated with a clearing of her throat. Throughout the meal Cosima kept her glass of water close at hand and a napkin within ready grasp. The onset of one particularly robust bout had Cosima excuse herself and make for the bathroom.
Shay watched her disappear around a corner, then turned to Delphine. "You okay?"
"What do you mean?" Delphine asked.
Shay decided to interpret that as an earnest question. "You've been quiet this whole time. You could try talking to her, get to know her."
Delphine held her gaze for a second, then ducked her head and wiped at a spot of flour on the table. "We talk. At work."
Shay leaned forward, voice falling in volume. "Am I missing something? Just because you're her boss doesn't mean you can't be her friend." The word "friend" brought a memory bubbling up. "Wait. Is Cosima the one--"
Movement cut off her question. Shay relaxed in her seat as Cosima rejoined them. She scanned Cosima's face.
"You okay?" Shay asked and felt a bizarre moment of self-consciousness when she realized she'd lobbed the exact same question at Delphine.
Cosima smiled and waved off Shay's concern. "Yeah, fine, fine. It's just--this cough. It's, uh, sticking around."
Shay nodded. "You know, licorice could help with that."
Cosima arched an eyebrow at her.
"You steep the root like a tea. It's sweet. I can give you some when we get back," Shay offered. Delphine shifted in her seat, sitting up straighter, perhaps stretching her spine.
Cosima cleared her throat and took a sip of water. "Any side effects?"
Shay considered. "Do you have high blood pressure?"
In a movement that looked reflexive, Cosima glanced at Delphine. It was just a second and didn't raise a reaction from Delphine. "I think I'm good."
"In large doses or with prolonged use, licorice can raise blood pressure," Shay clarified.
"Does it act as a suppressant or expectorant?" Delphine asked, without warning.
"I'm not sure," Shay admitted, almost startled into answering at the unexpectedness of Delphine's participation.
"Then you might want to hold off," Delphine said, speaking softly, but decidedly to Cosima, "or try it in small doses."
Shay spread her hands. "If your cough has been chronic, you'll probably want to consult a physician."
Her remark elicited brief, startled looks from both Cosima and Delphine, who then exchanged glances with one another.
"Yeah," Cosima said, slow, drawn out, returning her attention to Shay. "I'll keep that in mind." In a moment her eyes acquired a sparkle. "Did you notice there was tiramisu on the menu? What do you say?"
Shay contemplated her companions. Then she said yes, because she'd seen the tiramisu on the menu and that's what she could say to dessert. Not always, perhaps, but to mark a special occasion, of course.
Cosima smiled in delight at her answer.
*
Delphine dropped off Shay and Cosima in front of the apartment building and did not come in, though Shay wished she would, entreated her with a silent look to come inside, maybe so that the two of them could talk. There was a second where Delphine looked uncertain, like she might capitulate, but then she made an excuse about weekend chores and offered a halfhearted smile touched with apology.
In the hall Shay and Cosima went their separate ways, though it was almost like Cosima dropped her off at her door, drifting away but lingering to make sure Shay made it inside.
Once ensconced in her apartment, Shay considered her phone. She had a desire to send something to Delphine. A question. A comment. A string of question marks to encapsulate the mystification Delphine had left her with. But nothing sounded innocuous and everything seemed invasive and Shay didn't know what she wanted to know, anyway.
It had been a strange day spent with strangers.
One had come to her as a full-fledged unknown entity, but the other had revealed herself as unfathomable and unpredictable as the former before Shay's eyes.
//
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