trying to break the vicious cycle

[greenmeridian]

so lately, i've been required to participate in family meals. there's definitely stuff i won't touch and the fam is used to me passing on meat and starch products, that helps. i feel so awful after i eat though, both emotionally and physically. i been hitting the bathroom right after a meal and downing a bunch of Alli and lax. i thought this would

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[greenmeridian]

i get Alli on ebay. prices are much better, but yeah it's $$$ about 40 for 120 and i take 3-4 at a time (not following directions, of course!)