Oh god you guys this website. THIS WEBSITE. Seriously. This woman records her husband's chatterings while he's asleep and it is hilarious.Not only are there amazing insults such as these
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"I'm just a chubby ninja. Able to move between skinny people. Tiptoeing elephant. No one can see me. And then I attack! With ice cream and jelly, with chocolate sprinkles on top. Mmmmm."
"Christ on a bike!" "Your blue sky thinking is blighted with dark clouds of piss-poor ideas." "They're not love handles. I've got love impact protection barriers." "Keep close to me. My love is infectious, and there's no cure." "Jellyfish are attacking. Everybody grab your ice cream guns!"
I TALK IN MY SLEEP ALL THE TIME. Apparently, my college roommate wrote down everything she's ever heard me say in the middle of the night. I have not seen this list. I am not certain I want to.
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"Yah, I can't believe in God when I'm THIS good."
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I loled.
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"Your blue sky thinking is blighted with dark clouds of piss-poor ideas."
"They're not love handles. I've got love impact protection barriers."
"Keep close to me. My love is infectious, and there's no cure."
"Jellyfish are attacking. Everybody grab your ice cream guns!"
I want all of these as buttons. :3
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:D
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I want to marry this man.
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How about this one?
"I've got two things to say to you: fuck and off. Capisce?"
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