i wish i could write like i used to ( Read more... )

no im not dead. just fallen into a black hole of non-sobriety that im not really planning on pulling myself out of at the moment. but i need to start writing again. i stopped because it go too hard to see things spread out in front of me. ive gotted worse and worse at putting my fellings on paper and better and better at carving them into my skin. ( Read more... )

"my love is selfish . . . i cannot breath without you."

-keats

theres a beautiful sky tonight. . . . .

for now i'm here:

http://xanga.com/hellcatx

much love
-n

.....something about summer that makes me want to starve myself. i hate how weak i am.

friday was excellent. after suspention me and amber went to her house and coutts, rose, and her fiancee marc were there. we went for chinese and then to indian boundry and amber and marc were sparing and amber was losing horribly. it was raining and we all tackled her and then i started fighting marc but we kept falling because the grass was wet. ( Read more... )

& watching them.....it's just weird knowing no one will ever feel that way about me.

it's great how the only guy who never used me doesn't even fucking want me.

if you read the entry that was here forget it. i dont think ill be writing for a while.