Updatey... health, random, etc

[girlpirate]

I had an "appointment" to be called by my doctor at 4:40pm. I am waiting on MRI results. He called at 5:50, but when I picked up and said, "hello?" we were somehow disconnected.

And to my absolute devastation, he did not call backI tried calling the medical center, but they turn off the phones at 5:00pm. I held the phone, hoping he would call back

Comments

[wesa]

I know when everything in life seems to be going to hell in a hand basket, all the little things become so huge and major. I'm glad you're not letting all the little things bother you anymore/as much. Being resilient to those kinds of stress points will go so far in helping you approach all the other aspects of your life.

[girlpirate]

Those little random stresses mean nothing to me anymore. It's great!

Even the bigger stuff, like the constant cliquey, passive aggressive BS games the work girls play mean nothing. I get it. I'm not one of them. I ignore their shit now with feelings completely free of hurt or dejection. I have dozens of great work friends, and a couple of tacky, childish grown women mean nothing. It is their loss if they want to act like cuntmuffins and leave me out.

[ultrasushi]

The dangling yellow ones are GORGEOUS. But sadly they will probably be too large and heavy for me, because I have the smallest ears ever. :( But I'm sure they will make someone will regular-sized ears very happy!

[girlpirate]

I could make a pair with a single yellow disc if you like. :) These are not very heavy at all, really. surprisingly light for what they look like.

[ultrasushi]

I've been trying so hard to resist buying more of your jewelry... The thing is I need to save as much money as possible because I am going to visit my boyfriend's family in the Philippines next summer. The trip will be pretty expensive, so I'm challenging myself to buying only the most essential things (birth control, bus pass, school lunch) until I have enough money put aside.

I really wish I could help you though, because you are an amazing person. :) And oh so talented. I love the necklace I bought from you a few months back, in fact I wear it almost everyday!

[girlpirate]

Saving is good! And you are saving for a great cause. :)

[nicolemarieh]

awwwwww kiki, i didnt think anything i ever said made any impact like this

[girlpirate]

"i am sorry if it ever seemed like i didnt think you had a right to rant / journal about being upset, because that's not true, despite how comments might make it sound sometimes."

See, this is the thing. You didn't do anything wrong. You shouldn't be sorry. Girl, you changed my life. Please never tell me you're sorry again. :P I had developed such an automated, negative attitude at this point in my life, that your words instantly annoyed me. I felt judged. I felt negative things. I felt nothing good or productive. You are one of the sweetest, most wonderful people I have ever had the fortune of getting to know. And my emo brain was twisting something kind and well-intentioned into something negative that it should not have been. It was horribly wrong of me

[thetar]

i think you have every right to go in the next room and loose it for a bit. why not? it helps me not stab anyone. and if it helps you got for it. i would be frustrated too. and that kinda stuff will suck one into the negative.

glad some things are okay and some help found you.

and thanks for the treat which was so nice.

[girlpirate]

When shit gets this bad, it is hard not to get sucked into the hole of negativity. I am glad I climbed out. Or rather, people reached in and helped me out.

Dealing with my poor luck and personal issues was bad enough. Then I had to deal with people's shitty games, crap-talking, and gossip.

Those girls at work had me really self conscious for so long. It hurts being the one not liked... and they played their games with me. They enjoyed creating scenarios and leaving me out. They played all their stupid social games; I got sucked in. I have always been better at a more direct approach, and they are passive aggressive cuntballs. And who the fuck shit-talks someone when they are down? Or because they are down? I realized people like that aren't worth the energy I was wasting feeling bad about it. I have my friends. I am good.

Life is getting better. Thank goodness.

[thetar]

that stuff does suck. though i am not in it, i usually dont give a fuck what they say about me, because i guess it doesnt matter to me. i know how well i do my job and well that is good!

[thetar]

oops forgot to say so i am glad to see you not letting it get to you. they arent you and you are better than that. rock on.

[moonshineray]

*HUGS* You are amazing, life overwhelms us all sometimes and leaves us needing wakeup calls, and damn girl those are some pretty bits of lovely.

I am also so sorry you have to wait to hear about your results. This sucks on so many levels.

[girlpirate]

Thank you <3