The Sandman Cometh 24/40
A/N - Just a general warning that Finn is mentioned briefly in this chapter, which is untimely with Cory’s passing still fresh in our minds.
Thanks to those who commented on the last part - it’s nice to know you’re still reading. This is an interlude in every possible way.
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***
Blaine’s Interlude
***
I made it to Mason with a good hour to spare before the audition after heading off early. Although it probably wasn’t the best thing for my vocal cords, I pulled over and headed into a diner to get something to eat. My stomach was doing this weird fluttery growling thing after the lack of both dinner and breakfast this morning while my head was pounding from the excess of alcohol and crying.
After ordering, I nursed my cup of coffee and made the decision to text Thad. Of all the things I had done the night before, I’d forgotten to specifically ask him not to say anything to Kurt about our arrangement. And knowing Thad’s penchant to rub people’s noses in it, particularly Kurt’s, I wouldn’t put it past him to let it slip.
To Thad
‘Thaaaad. Please don’t tell Kurt about what we did.’
Nope.
‘Good morning. I wanted to thank you for last night.’
Oh boy. That makes it sound like it was a date, which it definitely wasn’t. Try again.
‘Morning Thad. Hey, can I ask that you keep what happened between us last night private? I’d really appreciate it if you didn’t tell Kurt.’
And send. I swallowed the last of my coffee and signaled for a refill just as my phone buzzed.
To Blaine
‘Hi babe. If you’re looking for a repeat performance, I think something can be arranged ;)’
To Thad
‘Thad, I had a great time last night but I’m not looking for anything more.’
It wasn’t a complete lie. I did enjoy the sex, even though the thought of Thad over me, in me sat like a stone in my stomach. But I had made it clear yesterday that a one night stand was a much as Thad was going to get. At least I thought I had. As the waitress approached with my plate, I shot off another quick message with the hope that he’d play ball.
To Thad
‘Please tell me that you’ll respect our agreement. And that you won’t say anything to Kurt.’
I sipped at my coffee, my leg jiggling as I waited for his reply, the seconds turning into minutes. Fuck. Please Thad. Just be a decent human being. You’ve always been nice to me. At least right up until you tried to drug me that is.
My empty coffee cup scraped the edge of my plate with an ugly noise as I fumbled to set it down, my shaky hand betraying the nerves I was trying to keep at bay. C’mon. Comeoncomeoncomeon. Fuck. C’mon Thad.
The phone rattled on the table.
To Blaine
‘Well Blaine seeing as we agreed to the terms of the trade, I’m obligated to give you my word as a Warbler. I just hope Kurt appreciates it. If he should ever find out, that is.’
To Thad
‘Thank you, Thad. Please don’t tell Kurt.’
To Blaine
‘Oh believe me, it was definitely my pleasure & I won’t say anything to your precious roommate. But if you change your mind about wanting to hook up again, you just let me know. After all, we were too busy fucking to try anything else. So if you want to fool around some more, give me a call.’
My thumb hovered over the reply button before I decided to let it slide. He’d agreed to my terms as I had to his. That was all I had needed to clarify. Sighing with relief, I slipped the phone into my pocket as my plate of eggs arrived. Time to get myself together for this audition.
Looking out the window, the phone vibrated again. I thumbed over the screen to reveal a text from Kurt. I quickly replied, thanking him and smiled to myself as I pocket the phone again. Courage.
***
The lights were blazing in the front rooms of the house as I pulled into the driveway. After parking in the garage and heading out into the chilly evening air, I soon found myself in a deserted and messy kitchen. Weird.
I glanced around looking for Carlos. He’d never let the kitchen get into this state. Not finding any sign of him, I headed for the living room, the raised voices piquing my interest. Hovering unseen outside the lounge doorway, it only took a second to figure out exactly what my dad and his shiny new wife were arguing about.
“For God’s sake, Lauren. He’s coming with us. I’m not leaving him here by himself over Christmas!”
“I’m sure his mother would like to have him for the holidays. But you would know all about that, wouldn’t you?” she sneered. “Seeing as how you’ve been talking to her ever since he came back from California!” she finished with a shout.
“I told you,” my father gritted out, “that Anne asked me to keep an eye on him. That something was up with him.”
My mouth dropped open in horror. Did he know? Did my mom tell him that I had to get tested? I took a sharp breath as my dad started to shout, the sheer volume jarring me against the wall.
“I’m his father and he doesn’t talk to me about these things. Or about anything! And it’s my duty, Lauren, to make sure he’s alright! And I’ll be damned if I’m going to spend Christmas without him! He’s my son dammit! Not some pretty bauble that you drag out of a box when it suits you!”
I stood there stunned. He’s defending me. Why is he defending me? He wants me to talk to him?
“Jerry, you know I-”
“He’s almost a man, Lauren. This may be my only chance to make things right or I’m going to lose him. As soon as he graduates, he’ll simply walk away and he won’t come back. So you can fire the staff and you can fill this house with trendy new things and you can pretend that Anne doesn’t exist but you can’t do that to my son. He’s a part of me! He’s probably the best part of me! And I won’t let you do it. I won’t.”
The best part of him? The best…I’m not…Of all the things that I am, I am not the best part of anyone. I am what they leave behind. My temples ached with the pressure of tears that were suddenly stinging my eyes.
“Oh Jerry,” she placated, clearly conceding. “Of course he can come with us. I’m sure we’ll have a lovely Christmas together, as a family. I’m sure Blaine won’t mind tagging along...”
I backed away, letting Lauren’s sharp voice fade out, and moved to the kitchen, dropping my bag as loudly as I could.
Wiping my eyes quickly, I called out to check if anyone was home and didn’t have to wait long for them both to sweep into the kitchen, arm in arm, syrupy smiles in place.
“Blaine! Just in time,” my father cheered with a nod. “Run up and get changed. We’re going to have dinner at the club tonight.”
Confused, I looked at the untidy kitchen bench and open cupboards. “But- Where’s Carlos? He promised that we could make homemade pizza and we-it’s o-our night to play chess...” I trailed off lamely as Lauren arched a perfectly plucked eyebrow at me.
My dad cleared his throat as he glanced at my step-mother. “He and Lauren had a bit of a disagreement earlier and unfortunately,” he sighed heavily, “Carlos won’t be coming back.”
“What? No!” I whined in alarm.
Lauren rolled her eyes. “Honestly Blaine, it’s not like he can’t be replaced,” Lauren chirped glibly, checking her nails. “However, after speaking with your father, it’s possible that I may have overreacted, even though it’s not my fault that Carlos can’t take criticism.” She waved her fingers delicately as if she could simply sweep it under the rug, “Your father will make a call in the morning and ask that he come back. And if he doesn’t, I wouldn’t worry about it if I were you. People like Carlos are a dime a dozen.”
How can you say that? Carlos is worth ten of you! And he’s my oldest friend!
“Don’t worry, son,” my dad said confidently as he clapped me on the shoulder, steering me towards the hall. “I’ll take care of it and make things right. Things wouldn’t be the same around here without Carlos. Now, get changed for the club. Why don’t you wear a bow tie? Didn’t you have an audition today? I want to hear about it over dinner.”
I frowned as I walked away, my bag slung over my shoulder. A bow tie? He hates my bow ties. And when I draw attention to myself as a performer. On the slog up the stairs to my room I had to wonder exactly what mom had told dad and resolved to call her tomorrow. Besides, she’ll want to know about the audition as well.
My phone buzzed in my pocket. Kurt. I pushed the call button straight away, eager to hear his voice for the first time since he left school yesterday.
“Hi.”
“So, how did it go? You got it, didn’t you? I mean, I knew there’d be competition but you were probably fantastic, so they gave it to you on the spot, right?”
“Ku-urt,” I whined, grinning to myself, heading down the upstairs hall. “There were so many people there; they didn’t have time to spend very long on each of us. They’ll let me know next week.”
“Even though I didn’t put any money on you, I’m positive you’ll get it!”
“Thanks, Kurt. It’s nice to know that someone’s in my corner.” I bit my lip as I dumped my bag by the desk and sat on the bed to untie my shoes, hesitating to tell him how weird my dad was acting. “So, how has your Saturday been? Any more drama between Finn and Rachel?”
I listened while getting ready, happy to focus on something benign that didn’t leave my head reeling any more than the mess of emotions I’d just experienced downstairs. Finding some Advil in the bathroom, I swallowed a couple of tablets down to ease the heaviness starting to throb in my temples as I listened to Kurt talk about Rachel’s cheating debacle.
***
The best part of me. What does that even mean?
I sat at my desk, staring out my bedroom window with my head propped up on a hand and watched the rain fall. Happy to have the house to myself while they were at church this morning, I let my music play on in the background. Not that it was loud. I’m not in a loud mood today.
I don’t even know what the best thing about dad is. Everything he touches falls apart. He holds things, people, too tightly. But he wants everything. Everyone. All their love. All at the same time. He’s never happy with just one person. It’s never enough for him. I’m never enough for him.
A quick glance at the silver framed photo of my mom perched on the corner of my desk calmed me down for a minute. I wonder how old she was when that was taken or even where we were. Was I two? Or three, maybe. It doesn’t look like any place I remember.
Stopped on a sunny path in some park somewhere; her fingers twined in my curly hair while I’m perched on her hip, as she’s smiling softly at the camera. At dad probably. Her eyes twinkling as her cheek rests against my head. She looks so happy.
Looking back out the window, watching the trees sway with the wind, I had to wonder. Was it all a lie? How could she have been happy with him after everything he’d done? An affair, a child, a payoff. Having to raise me as part of a twisted deceit to the world at large - their world - their stupid world where everything is hidden by smiles, suits, martinis and party dresses. Where no one really knows what happens behind closed doors. Where no one bothers to look, to ask, to care if someone is falling apart until the whole façade comes crumbling down around them. Where everyone looks away politely and gossips while you’re left standing in the smashed shell that had been your life, at least until you can figure out how to build yourself up with the broken pieces until you look like one of them again.
How could he break something - someone - so beautiful? How could he be so selfish? To just take and take until there was barely anything left. Did she feel hollow like I do? Is that why she finally left? So he couldn’t have it all?
My reflection stared back at me from the window pane. Empty. A paper thin skin holding what? Nothing. Nothing useful. Nothing good. I can see him in there. In me. Waiting to hurt people I care about.
That’s what it is. That’s what he does best. And I’m a chip off the old block, he said it himself.
My hand tightened around my phone, fingers itching to hit speed dial, when it rang in my hand. I almost dropped it in surprise but swiped the screen to answer the call quickly, not even seeing who was ringing.
“Mom?” I breathed out, my voice shaky but hopeful.
“Blaine?”
I sniffed and swallowed the lump in my throat. “Kurt! H-hi.”
“Hey, hi. Are you okay? Did I call at a bad time?”
“What? No, no. I just-I was just dialling out and…” I swallowed hard again, “…there you were! Uh, surprise!” Ugh, I sound so fake and stupid! Groaning internally, I dropped my head to the desk and banged my forehead against it a couple of times.
Kurt laughed softly into the receiver. “I-I called because…um, are you busy tonight?”
***
Kurt’s Interlude
***
“Hey kiddo? Whoa, whoa. What are ya’ doing!”
Kurt puffed as he brought his legs back to the ground and sat up. “Yoga. It helps with my flexibility. You should try it; it’s very meditative and good for you.”
“Kurt, there’s no way I’m gonna let you tie me up like a pretzel.”
“Dad,” he laughed. “I wouldn’t even try. Here just sit down and take some deep breaths.”
Burt held up his hands in mock surrender. “I was actually coming to ask if you were joining Carole and me tonight. We’re going out for burgers and then bowling. You want in?”
“Oh, yeah okay. Sounds like a bit of fun, even if I have to wear their sad excuses for clown shoes.”
“They’re not clown shoes! It’s a classic, time honored tradition…”
“Yeah, to get a fungal infection,” Kurt interrupted.
“…For a Saturday night out with a certain Mister Hummel. So, why don’t you call up Blaine and see if he wants to join us.”
“Thanks, dad, but he drove to Mason and back again for an audition yesterday so he’s probably sick of driving and I’m pretty sure he heads back to Dalton tonight anyway.”
“An audition? For what?”
“A theme park Christmas show. I talked to him yesterday. He said there were a lot of people but he thinks he did okay, which probably means he nailed it.”
Burt raised his eyebrows and nodded with a smile. “Okay, but you’re in, which means we need to round up a fourth seeing as Finn is out for dinner tonight. Any ideas?”
“I could call one of the girls,” he suggested. “Or maybe I should try Blaine first.” Kurt’s eyes fell upon his goodie box hiding under his bed as he pondered who he should call. “Just to see if he wants to come on-with-. B-b-bowling, I mean,” Kurt stammered as he got up off the floor in a hurry.
***
“Sorry dad, Tina just called, she can’t come after all,” Kurt grumbled as he flopped in the seat beside his father. “I should have tried harder to coax Blaine into coming. Bribery might have worked.”
“Ah well, we’ll make do with the three of us. Besides if the kid said he wasn’t in the mood, then bribing him with cookies wasn’t going to help your cause. Especially if they’re the fat free ones,” Burt said, shooting a wry smile to a grinning Carole. “Are you going to finish those fries, kiddo?”
“Da-ad!” Kurt smacked away his father’s hand lightly.
“Kurt?” A voice called out from the booth behind him making Kurt twist around in confusion.
“James? Hey, hi. You eat at Breadstix?!”
The tall blond grinned back at him, blue eyes twinkling. “Not everyone at Dalton comes from money, Kurt. And call me Jimmy. Only Mr Walters and the other teachers call me James.”
“Who’s your friend, Kurt?” Burt enquired.
“Oh. Dad, Carole, this is Ja-Jimmy. We’re in AP History together.”
“And the Warblers,” Jimmy added with a nod to Kurt’s parents.
“So you’re friends with Blaine as well?” Carole asked.
“You could say that. Blaine’s pretty easy to get along with, y’know? But Kurt here, well, he’s more of a mystery man. We haven’t really had the chance to talk much.”
“You could join us,” Burt offered. “We were just about to order dessert.”
“Dad-” Kurt blurted out in surprised whisper. “He’s already got plans,” he said in a hushed voice, his hand waving back and forth between the booths.
“It’s okay, Kurt. It’s just my brother and his friends. They won’t mind if I ditch them for a bit,” Jimmy murmured as he leaned towards the other boy. On cue, one of the other older looking boys at his table whistled as another led a short but noisy protest while a third, another blond, presumably Jimmy’s brother Kurt thought, shuffled out of the booth and slapped the broad blond on the back as he made his way around to Kurt’s table.
Jimmy slid in beside Kurt and thanked Burt for the invitation as the waitress arrived to take their orders.
“So, Jimmy, are you in any other clubs at Dalton?” Carole asked with a smile as the waitress moved away.
“Just football, ma’am. It’s how I got my scholarship.”
Burt grinned broadly and glanced at Kurt. “Yeah? What position?”
“Tight End, sir.”
Kurt choked on his Diet Coke and struggled to get the glass back on the table without spilling his drink. Jimmy turned to him with a smile as he leaned closer and patted firmly between Kurt’s shoulder blades.
“Yeah, I know. I’m James Kirk and I’m a tight end. Believe me; I’ve heard all the jokes you could possibly think of,” Jimmy concluded with a laugh as Kurt joined him, not bothering to hide his grin.
“Jesus, kid. That’s a tough break,” Burt chuckled even as Jimmy shrugged.
“It could’ve been worse. My mom had a crush on Captain Kirk. I consider myself lucky I wasn’t called Tiberius.” Carole’s giggle and snort immediately set the table off laughing again.
***
“Are you sure you don’t mind?” Kurt asked as he leaned on the counter, waiting for his shoes.
“Of course not. They’re really nice. Besides I like spending time with you. Oh, uh, size eleven, thanks.”
Kurt flushed at Jimmy’s admission while the guy behind the counter found the correct size bowling shoes for the striking blond. A jock, Kurt realized. Tall, broad and nice. The perfect combination of Finn’s height, Sam’s looks and blue eyes wrapped up with Blaine’s manners. Blaine, he jolted with a start. He hadn’t thought about Blaine for hours, he remembered guiltily. He knows that it’s not like he owes him anything. Blaine seems just as oblivious to Kurt’s feelings as ever, seemingly dwelling on something else this past week, maybe even someone else. Perhaps a distraction is exactly what Kurt needs for one night. Even if Jimmy wasn’t gay, he certainly seemed friendly enough and it’d be nice to have another close friend at Dalton.
As they walked over to their lane, Kurt glanced down at his outfit to make sure everything was as it should be. Black skinny jeans, white dress shirt and charcoal waistcoat set off the heavy black wool coat and red scarf he was still wearing. He huffed quietly as he realized he was simply wearing a variation of their school uniform.
***
“Contrary to what you’ve just seen, I do know how to bowl,” Kurt grumbled as he dropped into the seat next to Jimmy.
“You’re doing fine. Try bending your knees a little more, to get the follow through,” Jimmy advised. “Here, watch me.”
Kurt nodded as his new friend got up and fetched a ball, his eyes trailing up the long, strong legs before coming to settle on Jimmy’s ass. He watched him pull back and swing, bending a knee and dropping a leg behind him as the ball barreled down the lane to knock all the pins over with a loud smack. Kurt barely had the presence of mind to glance away as Jimmy spun around, arms raised in victory at the strike.
Smiling as he sipped his soda, Kurt watched his dad talk smack to Jimmy as he got up for his turn. When the other boy took his seat, he was shocked to feel Jimmy press up against his side and speak quietly.
“Were you watching me?”
Kurt swallowed hard. “Y-you told me t-to.”
“And what did you think?”
“Um, very nice f-form?” He hoped that was safe enough to say.
Jimmy chuckled and leaned back in his seat, arm draped across the back of Kurt’s chair. “Relax, Kurt. I like it when you look at me. Especially like that.”
Kurt’s mouth dropped open and snapped shut immediately as he turned to look the other boy, eyes wide.
“I think I’d like you to look at me again. Maybe…over dinner next weekend? Just the two of us?”
“Y-you-? You’re-?”
Jimmy laughed at the shell shocked look on Kurt’s face. “Uh huh,” he said, nodding. “I don’t exactly advertise it but I’m not hiding either and I’d very much like to get to know you better, Kurt.”
Kurt was nodding even though he couldn’t exactly feel his face at that particular moment.
“So that’s a yes?”
Kurt nodded mutely again, squeaking as Jimmy’s hand moved from the back of his chair to smooth down his spine only to move away again.
“Breathe, Kurt,” Jimmy chuckled as he bit lip in a grin. “Oh my God, you’re so cute.”
***
Even with the noise of bullets ricocheting down the hallway, Kurt didn’t dare start up his vibrator. Instead he reached past it and pulled the lube from his box of goodies still hidden under his bed.
Finally settled on his back, door locked and pajama pants shoved down, Kurt touched himself lightly. With each pop of a button on his pajama top, he slid the other hand further up over his stomach and chest. Flat palms smoothed over his nipples, before pulling back over them with just his thumbs. He pinched each one as his hips jerked off the bed instinctively.
Fingers rolled a fleshy nub between his thumb and fingers while the other hand scratched its way down his rib cage and over his hip bone. Kurt’s cock, hard and already weeping, twitched in anticipation.
Kurt flipped the lid on the tube and squeezed a dollop of lube out on the head of his dick. After shoving the tube under his pillow, his fingers toyed with the melting gel. Thumb rubbing slick and soft, fingers pressing and stroking. Finally taking a grip on his shaft, Kurt twisted his hand to slick himself up and started to pump.
“Uh,” he panted quietly. Hazy visions of blue eyes danced in front of him as he closed his own. Remembering Jimmy’s bold grin and the press of his body earlier, Kurt shifted his hips restlessly. “Fuck,” he moaned in a barely there whisper. “Fuck, touch me. Fuck, Bl- Oh, God.”
Kurt fucked up into his fist faster as he thought about how Jimmy had hugged him when they’d dropped him off after bowling. The way he’d been able to squeeze one of the blond’s big biceps. “Oh.” The scent of citrus aftershave still clinging to his skin. “Fuck.” The way Jimmy had wrapped him up so easily against his broad chest. “Yes!”
Kurt’s eyes squeezed shut as his body bucked, come spurting across his spasming stomach. He lay there panting at the ceiling, the thought of a date next weekend making him smile. Wait until I tell Blaine, he thought, a smile still playing on his lips. Kurt frowned at the thought of his gorgeous roommate. Biting his lip, he grabbed a bunch of tissues for clean up and wondered how to broach the subject with his best friend. The one he had a giant crush on. Shit.
***
A/N - Will Kurt tell Blaine about his date? How will Blaine react, if he finds out? Will Thad throw Blaine under the bus about their deal? What’s going to happen in the weeks before Christmas between the roommates? One thing’s for sure - there’s going to be a duet, a gift and a first for Kurt.
Part 25>>
Thanks to those who commented on the last part - it’s nice to know you’re still reading. This is an interlude in every possible way.
<
***
Blaine’s Interlude
***
I made it to Mason with a good hour to spare before the audition after heading off early. Although it probably wasn’t the best thing for my vocal cords, I pulled over and headed into a diner to get something to eat. My stomach was doing this weird fluttery growling thing after the lack of both dinner and breakfast this morning while my head was pounding from the excess of alcohol and crying.
After ordering, I nursed my cup of coffee and made the decision to text Thad. Of all the things I had done the night before, I’d forgotten to specifically ask him not to say anything to Kurt about our arrangement. And knowing Thad’s penchant to rub people’s noses in it, particularly Kurt’s, I wouldn’t put it past him to let it slip.
To Thad
‘Thaaaad. Please don’t tell Kurt about what we did.’
Nope.
‘Good morning. I wanted to thank you for last night.’
Oh boy. That makes it sound like it was a date, which it definitely wasn’t. Try again.
‘Morning Thad. Hey, can I ask that you keep what happened between us last night private? I’d really appreciate it if you didn’t tell Kurt.’
And send. I swallowed the last of my coffee and signaled for a refill just as my phone buzzed.
To Blaine
‘Hi babe. If you’re looking for a repeat performance, I think something can be arranged ;)’
To Thad
‘Thad, I had a great time last night but I’m not looking for anything more.’
It wasn’t a complete lie. I did enjoy the sex, even though the thought of Thad over me, in me sat like a stone in my stomach. But I had made it clear yesterday that a one night stand was a much as Thad was going to get. At least I thought I had. As the waitress approached with my plate, I shot off another quick message with the hope that he’d play ball.
To Thad
‘Please tell me that you’ll respect our agreement. And that you won’t say anything to Kurt.’
I sipped at my coffee, my leg jiggling as I waited for his reply, the seconds turning into minutes. Fuck. Please Thad. Just be a decent human being. You’ve always been nice to me. At least right up until you tried to drug me that is.
My empty coffee cup scraped the edge of my plate with an ugly noise as I fumbled to set it down, my shaky hand betraying the nerves I was trying to keep at bay. C’mon. Comeoncomeoncomeon. Fuck. C’mon Thad.
The phone rattled on the table.
To Blaine
‘Well Blaine seeing as we agreed to the terms of the trade, I’m obligated to give you my word as a Warbler. I just hope Kurt appreciates it. If he should ever find out, that is.’
To Thad
‘Thank you, Thad. Please don’t tell Kurt.’
To Blaine
‘Oh believe me, it was definitely my pleasure & I won’t say anything to your precious roommate. But if you change your mind about wanting to hook up again, you just let me know. After all, we were too busy fucking to try anything else. So if you want to fool around some more, give me a call.’
My thumb hovered over the reply button before I decided to let it slide. He’d agreed to my terms as I had to his. That was all I had needed to clarify. Sighing with relief, I slipped the phone into my pocket as my plate of eggs arrived. Time to get myself together for this audition.
Looking out the window, the phone vibrated again. I thumbed over the screen to reveal a text from Kurt. I quickly replied, thanking him and smiled to myself as I pocket the phone again. Courage.
***
The lights were blazing in the front rooms of the house as I pulled into the driveway. After parking in the garage and heading out into the chilly evening air, I soon found myself in a deserted and messy kitchen. Weird.
I glanced around looking for Carlos. He’d never let the kitchen get into this state. Not finding any sign of him, I headed for the living room, the raised voices piquing my interest. Hovering unseen outside the lounge doorway, it only took a second to figure out exactly what my dad and his shiny new wife were arguing about.
“For God’s sake, Lauren. He’s coming with us. I’m not leaving him here by himself over Christmas!”
“I’m sure his mother would like to have him for the holidays. But you would know all about that, wouldn’t you?” she sneered. “Seeing as how you’ve been talking to her ever since he came back from California!” she finished with a shout.
“I told you,” my father gritted out, “that Anne asked me to keep an eye on him. That something was up with him.”
My mouth dropped open in horror. Did he know? Did my mom tell him that I had to get tested? I took a sharp breath as my dad started to shout, the sheer volume jarring me against the wall.
“I’m his father and he doesn’t talk to me about these things. Or about anything! And it’s my duty, Lauren, to make sure he’s alright! And I’ll be damned if I’m going to spend Christmas without him! He’s my son dammit! Not some pretty bauble that you drag out of a box when it suits you!”
I stood there stunned. He’s defending me. Why is he defending me? He wants me to talk to him?
“Jerry, you know I-”
“He’s almost a man, Lauren. This may be my only chance to make things right or I’m going to lose him. As soon as he graduates, he’ll simply walk away and he won’t come back. So you can fire the staff and you can fill this house with trendy new things and you can pretend that Anne doesn’t exist but you can’t do that to my son. He’s a part of me! He’s probably the best part of me! And I won’t let you do it. I won’t.”
The best part of him? The best…I’m not…Of all the things that I am, I am not the best part of anyone. I am what they leave behind. My temples ached with the pressure of tears that were suddenly stinging my eyes.
“Oh Jerry,” she placated, clearly conceding. “Of course he can come with us. I’m sure we’ll have a lovely Christmas together, as a family. I’m sure Blaine won’t mind tagging along...”
I backed away, letting Lauren’s sharp voice fade out, and moved to the kitchen, dropping my bag as loudly as I could.
Wiping my eyes quickly, I called out to check if anyone was home and didn’t have to wait long for them both to sweep into the kitchen, arm in arm, syrupy smiles in place.
“Blaine! Just in time,” my father cheered with a nod. “Run up and get changed. We’re going to have dinner at the club tonight.”
Confused, I looked at the untidy kitchen bench and open cupboards. “But- Where’s Carlos? He promised that we could make homemade pizza and we-it’s o-our night to play chess...” I trailed off lamely as Lauren arched a perfectly plucked eyebrow at me.
My dad cleared his throat as he glanced at my step-mother. “He and Lauren had a bit of a disagreement earlier and unfortunately,” he sighed heavily, “Carlos won’t be coming back.”
“What? No!” I whined in alarm.
Lauren rolled her eyes. “Honestly Blaine, it’s not like he can’t be replaced,” Lauren chirped glibly, checking her nails. “However, after speaking with your father, it’s possible that I may have overreacted, even though it’s not my fault that Carlos can’t take criticism.” She waved her fingers delicately as if she could simply sweep it under the rug, “Your father will make a call in the morning and ask that he come back. And if he doesn’t, I wouldn’t worry about it if I were you. People like Carlos are a dime a dozen.”
How can you say that? Carlos is worth ten of you! And he’s my oldest friend!
“Don’t worry, son,” my dad said confidently as he clapped me on the shoulder, steering me towards the hall. “I’ll take care of it and make things right. Things wouldn’t be the same around here without Carlos. Now, get changed for the club. Why don’t you wear a bow tie? Didn’t you have an audition today? I want to hear about it over dinner.”
I frowned as I walked away, my bag slung over my shoulder. A bow tie? He hates my bow ties. And when I draw attention to myself as a performer. On the slog up the stairs to my room I had to wonder exactly what mom had told dad and resolved to call her tomorrow. Besides, she’ll want to know about the audition as well.
My phone buzzed in my pocket. Kurt. I pushed the call button straight away, eager to hear his voice for the first time since he left school yesterday.
“Hi.”
“So, how did it go? You got it, didn’t you? I mean, I knew there’d be competition but you were probably fantastic, so they gave it to you on the spot, right?”
“Ku-urt,” I whined, grinning to myself, heading down the upstairs hall. “There were so many people there; they didn’t have time to spend very long on each of us. They’ll let me know next week.”
“Even though I didn’t put any money on you, I’m positive you’ll get it!”
“Thanks, Kurt. It’s nice to know that someone’s in my corner.” I bit my lip as I dumped my bag by the desk and sat on the bed to untie my shoes, hesitating to tell him how weird my dad was acting. “So, how has your Saturday been? Any more drama between Finn and Rachel?”
I listened while getting ready, happy to focus on something benign that didn’t leave my head reeling any more than the mess of emotions I’d just experienced downstairs. Finding some Advil in the bathroom, I swallowed a couple of tablets down to ease the heaviness starting to throb in my temples as I listened to Kurt talk about Rachel’s cheating debacle.
***
The best part of me. What does that even mean?
I sat at my desk, staring out my bedroom window with my head propped up on a hand and watched the rain fall. Happy to have the house to myself while they were at church this morning, I let my music play on in the background. Not that it was loud. I’m not in a loud mood today.
I don’t even know what the best thing about dad is. Everything he touches falls apart. He holds things, people, too tightly. But he wants everything. Everyone. All their love. All at the same time. He’s never happy with just one person. It’s never enough for him. I’m never enough for him.
A quick glance at the silver framed photo of my mom perched on the corner of my desk calmed me down for a minute. I wonder how old she was when that was taken or even where we were. Was I two? Or three, maybe. It doesn’t look like any place I remember.
Stopped on a sunny path in some park somewhere; her fingers twined in my curly hair while I’m perched on her hip, as she’s smiling softly at the camera. At dad probably. Her eyes twinkling as her cheek rests against my head. She looks so happy.
Looking back out the window, watching the trees sway with the wind, I had to wonder. Was it all a lie? How could she have been happy with him after everything he’d done? An affair, a child, a payoff. Having to raise me as part of a twisted deceit to the world at large - their world - their stupid world where everything is hidden by smiles, suits, martinis and party dresses. Where no one really knows what happens behind closed doors. Where no one bothers to look, to ask, to care if someone is falling apart until the whole façade comes crumbling down around them. Where everyone looks away politely and gossips while you’re left standing in the smashed shell that had been your life, at least until you can figure out how to build yourself up with the broken pieces until you look like one of them again.
How could he break something - someone - so beautiful? How could he be so selfish? To just take and take until there was barely anything left. Did she feel hollow like I do? Is that why she finally left? So he couldn’t have it all?
My reflection stared back at me from the window pane. Empty. A paper thin skin holding what? Nothing. Nothing useful. Nothing good. I can see him in there. In me. Waiting to hurt people I care about.
That’s what it is. That’s what he does best. And I’m a chip off the old block, he said it himself.
My hand tightened around my phone, fingers itching to hit speed dial, when it rang in my hand. I almost dropped it in surprise but swiped the screen to answer the call quickly, not even seeing who was ringing.
“Mom?” I breathed out, my voice shaky but hopeful.
“Blaine?”
I sniffed and swallowed the lump in my throat. “Kurt! H-hi.”
“Hey, hi. Are you okay? Did I call at a bad time?”
“What? No, no. I just-I was just dialling out and…” I swallowed hard again, “…there you were! Uh, surprise!” Ugh, I sound so fake and stupid! Groaning internally, I dropped my head to the desk and banged my forehead against it a couple of times.
Kurt laughed softly into the receiver. “I-I called because…um, are you busy tonight?”
***
Kurt’s Interlude
***
“Hey kiddo? Whoa, whoa. What are ya’ doing!”
Kurt puffed as he brought his legs back to the ground and sat up. “Yoga. It helps with my flexibility. You should try it; it’s very meditative and good for you.”
“Kurt, there’s no way I’m gonna let you tie me up like a pretzel.”
“Dad,” he laughed. “I wouldn’t even try. Here just sit down and take some deep breaths.”
Burt held up his hands in mock surrender. “I was actually coming to ask if you were joining Carole and me tonight. We’re going out for burgers and then bowling. You want in?”
“Oh, yeah okay. Sounds like a bit of fun, even if I have to wear their sad excuses for clown shoes.”
“They’re not clown shoes! It’s a classic, time honored tradition…”
“Yeah, to get a fungal infection,” Kurt interrupted.
“…For a Saturday night out with a certain Mister Hummel. So, why don’t you call up Blaine and see if he wants to join us.”
“Thanks, dad, but he drove to Mason and back again for an audition yesterday so he’s probably sick of driving and I’m pretty sure he heads back to Dalton tonight anyway.”
“An audition? For what?”
“A theme park Christmas show. I talked to him yesterday. He said there were a lot of people but he thinks he did okay, which probably means he nailed it.”
Burt raised his eyebrows and nodded with a smile. “Okay, but you’re in, which means we need to round up a fourth seeing as Finn is out for dinner tonight. Any ideas?”
“I could call one of the girls,” he suggested. “Or maybe I should try Blaine first.” Kurt’s eyes fell upon his goodie box hiding under his bed as he pondered who he should call. “Just to see if he wants to come on-with-. B-b-bowling, I mean,” Kurt stammered as he got up off the floor in a hurry.
***
“Sorry dad, Tina just called, she can’t come after all,” Kurt grumbled as he flopped in the seat beside his father. “I should have tried harder to coax Blaine into coming. Bribery might have worked.”
“Ah well, we’ll make do with the three of us. Besides if the kid said he wasn’t in the mood, then bribing him with cookies wasn’t going to help your cause. Especially if they’re the fat free ones,” Burt said, shooting a wry smile to a grinning Carole. “Are you going to finish those fries, kiddo?”
“Da-ad!” Kurt smacked away his father’s hand lightly.
“Kurt?” A voice called out from the booth behind him making Kurt twist around in confusion.
“James? Hey, hi. You eat at Breadstix?!”
The tall blond grinned back at him, blue eyes twinkling. “Not everyone at Dalton comes from money, Kurt. And call me Jimmy. Only Mr Walters and the other teachers call me James.”
“Who’s your friend, Kurt?” Burt enquired.
“Oh. Dad, Carole, this is Ja-Jimmy. We’re in AP History together.”
“And the Warblers,” Jimmy added with a nod to Kurt’s parents.
“So you’re friends with Blaine as well?” Carole asked.
“You could say that. Blaine’s pretty easy to get along with, y’know? But Kurt here, well, he’s more of a mystery man. We haven’t really had the chance to talk much.”
“You could join us,” Burt offered. “We were just about to order dessert.”
“Dad-” Kurt blurted out in surprised whisper. “He’s already got plans,” he said in a hushed voice, his hand waving back and forth between the booths.
“It’s okay, Kurt. It’s just my brother and his friends. They won’t mind if I ditch them for a bit,” Jimmy murmured as he leaned towards the other boy. On cue, one of the other older looking boys at his table whistled as another led a short but noisy protest while a third, another blond, presumably Jimmy’s brother Kurt thought, shuffled out of the booth and slapped the broad blond on the back as he made his way around to Kurt’s table.
Jimmy slid in beside Kurt and thanked Burt for the invitation as the waitress arrived to take their orders.
“So, Jimmy, are you in any other clubs at Dalton?” Carole asked with a smile as the waitress moved away.
“Just football, ma’am. It’s how I got my scholarship.”
Burt grinned broadly and glanced at Kurt. “Yeah? What position?”
“Tight End, sir.”
Kurt choked on his Diet Coke and struggled to get the glass back on the table without spilling his drink. Jimmy turned to him with a smile as he leaned closer and patted firmly between Kurt’s shoulder blades.
“Yeah, I know. I’m James Kirk and I’m a tight end. Believe me; I’ve heard all the jokes you could possibly think of,” Jimmy concluded with a laugh as Kurt joined him, not bothering to hide his grin.
“Jesus, kid. That’s a tough break,” Burt chuckled even as Jimmy shrugged.
“It could’ve been worse. My mom had a crush on Captain Kirk. I consider myself lucky I wasn’t called Tiberius.” Carole’s giggle and snort immediately set the table off laughing again.
***
“Are you sure you don’t mind?” Kurt asked as he leaned on the counter, waiting for his shoes.
“Of course not. They’re really nice. Besides I like spending time with you. Oh, uh, size eleven, thanks.”
Kurt flushed at Jimmy’s admission while the guy behind the counter found the correct size bowling shoes for the striking blond. A jock, Kurt realized. Tall, broad and nice. The perfect combination of Finn’s height, Sam’s looks and blue eyes wrapped up with Blaine’s manners. Blaine, he jolted with a start. He hadn’t thought about Blaine for hours, he remembered guiltily. He knows that it’s not like he owes him anything. Blaine seems just as oblivious to Kurt’s feelings as ever, seemingly dwelling on something else this past week, maybe even someone else. Perhaps a distraction is exactly what Kurt needs for one night. Even if Jimmy wasn’t gay, he certainly seemed friendly enough and it’d be nice to have another close friend at Dalton.
As they walked over to their lane, Kurt glanced down at his outfit to make sure everything was as it should be. Black skinny jeans, white dress shirt and charcoal waistcoat set off the heavy black wool coat and red scarf he was still wearing. He huffed quietly as he realized he was simply wearing a variation of their school uniform.
***
“Contrary to what you’ve just seen, I do know how to bowl,” Kurt grumbled as he dropped into the seat next to Jimmy.
“You’re doing fine. Try bending your knees a little more, to get the follow through,” Jimmy advised. “Here, watch me.”
Kurt nodded as his new friend got up and fetched a ball, his eyes trailing up the long, strong legs before coming to settle on Jimmy’s ass. He watched him pull back and swing, bending a knee and dropping a leg behind him as the ball barreled down the lane to knock all the pins over with a loud smack. Kurt barely had the presence of mind to glance away as Jimmy spun around, arms raised in victory at the strike.
Smiling as he sipped his soda, Kurt watched his dad talk smack to Jimmy as he got up for his turn. When the other boy took his seat, he was shocked to feel Jimmy press up against his side and speak quietly.
“Were you watching me?”
Kurt swallowed hard. “Y-you told me t-to.”
“And what did you think?”
“Um, very nice f-form?” He hoped that was safe enough to say.
Jimmy chuckled and leaned back in his seat, arm draped across the back of Kurt’s chair. “Relax, Kurt. I like it when you look at me. Especially like that.”
Kurt’s mouth dropped open and snapped shut immediately as he turned to look the other boy, eyes wide.
“I think I’d like you to look at me again. Maybe…over dinner next weekend? Just the two of us?”
“Y-you-? You’re-?”
Jimmy laughed at the shell shocked look on Kurt’s face. “Uh huh,” he said, nodding. “I don’t exactly advertise it but I’m not hiding either and I’d very much like to get to know you better, Kurt.”
Kurt was nodding even though he couldn’t exactly feel his face at that particular moment.
“So that’s a yes?”
Kurt nodded mutely again, squeaking as Jimmy’s hand moved from the back of his chair to smooth down his spine only to move away again.
“Breathe, Kurt,” Jimmy chuckled as he bit lip in a grin. “Oh my God, you’re so cute.”
***
Even with the noise of bullets ricocheting down the hallway, Kurt didn’t dare start up his vibrator. Instead he reached past it and pulled the lube from his box of goodies still hidden under his bed.
Finally settled on his back, door locked and pajama pants shoved down, Kurt touched himself lightly. With each pop of a button on his pajama top, he slid the other hand further up over his stomach and chest. Flat palms smoothed over his nipples, before pulling back over them with just his thumbs. He pinched each one as his hips jerked off the bed instinctively.
Fingers rolled a fleshy nub between his thumb and fingers while the other hand scratched its way down his rib cage and over his hip bone. Kurt’s cock, hard and already weeping, twitched in anticipation.
Kurt flipped the lid on the tube and squeezed a dollop of lube out on the head of his dick. After shoving the tube under his pillow, his fingers toyed with the melting gel. Thumb rubbing slick and soft, fingers pressing and stroking. Finally taking a grip on his shaft, Kurt twisted his hand to slick himself up and started to pump.
“Uh,” he panted quietly. Hazy visions of blue eyes danced in front of him as he closed his own. Remembering Jimmy’s bold grin and the press of his body earlier, Kurt shifted his hips restlessly. “Fuck,” he moaned in a barely there whisper. “Fuck, touch me. Fuck, Bl- Oh, God.”
Kurt fucked up into his fist faster as he thought about how Jimmy had hugged him when they’d dropped him off after bowling. The way he’d been able to squeeze one of the blond’s big biceps. “Oh.” The scent of citrus aftershave still clinging to his skin. “Fuck.” The way Jimmy had wrapped him up so easily against his broad chest. “Yes!”
Kurt’s eyes squeezed shut as his body bucked, come spurting across his spasming stomach. He lay there panting at the ceiling, the thought of a date next weekend making him smile. Wait until I tell Blaine, he thought, a smile still playing on his lips. Kurt frowned at the thought of his gorgeous roommate. Biting his lip, he grabbed a bunch of tissues for clean up and wondered how to broach the subject with his best friend. The one he had a giant crush on. Shit.
***
A/N - Will Kurt tell Blaine about his date? How will Blaine react, if he finds out? Will Thad throw Blaine under the bus about their deal? What’s going to happen in the weeks before Christmas between the roommates? One thing’s for sure - there’s going to be a duet, a gift and a first for Kurt.
Part 25>>