The Sandman Cometh 23/40
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Additional warnings: There is an explicit POV of a dub-con experience and fallout in this part (not involving Kurt) as well as underage drinking.
***
My heart was racing. Three rooms left to draw and neither Kurt nor I had been pulled from the bowl yet.
“And the next person is…” Wes unraveled the piece of paper, “Blaine!”
My heart thudded, the sound reverberating in my throat. This is it.
“Your new roommate is…”
Please. Please. Please let it be Kurt.
“Trent!” Wes called out to a few cheers.
Oh. No, no, no. No! My stomach roiled at the thought of not waking up and seeing Kurt.
“Okay and we have Thad up next! And your roommate will be…”
Please, no. Not Kurt. Not my Kurt. Not my-
“Kurt!”
FUCK! I clenched my fists in my pockets as I stayed perched on the arm of the sofa. Keep it together, man.
“That leaves Flint…who will be rooming with Jeff!” Wes paused as Jeff cheered for himself before continuing. “Warblers, remember you may negotiate to switch rooms but I must stress that the point of this is a bonding exercise. So negotiating to keep your current roommate will be frowned upon! The same goes for those wanting to share a room with their boyfriend!” Wes said as he shot a glare and a point of his gavel towards Nick. A murmur of ascension rippled through the assembled boys before Wes slammed his gavel down one final time to end proceedings.
Jeff shrugged as Nick took a seat beside him on the couch. “I don’t even know why he bothers to say that every time. We’ve had that talk. We don’t want to live together.”
“Wait? You don’t?” I asked.
“No way! You’ve seen how messy Jeff is. It’d drive me crazy in a heartbeat,” Nick said with a frown.
“And his collection of hair products is more extensive than yours, Blaine,” Jeff added as he exchanged a cautious look with his boyfriend. “So, uh, you’re losing Kurt-”
“Not if I can help it,” I chimed in as an opportunity wandered past me. “Hey Thad! Wait up!”
Crossing the room, I led Thad away from the fray with my arm slung carelessly over his shoulders. I tried to explain that Kurt was still finding his feet and that uprooting him from the room that he was just getting comfortable in might not be the best thing for him, finally ending it with a play to Thad’s sympathies. “He’s still a little fragile.”
“Yeah, but getting to know someone else might bring him more out of his shell,” Thad countered.
“I don’t know,” I scrambled. “Look at how he over-reacted the other week at lunch. And that was Jeff! Everyone likes Jeff. Plus I was right there, Thad, and I couldn’t keep him calm. Now, you two haven’t been the friendliest and I just think that it might make him shut down a little more.”
“So, what do you want to do? Have him room with Trent?”
“Oh.” Shit! I hadn’t thought of that. “Um…no. I was thinking that maybe Trent could, uh, room with you?”
Thad arched his eyebrow at me suspiciously as he crossed his arms. Giving me the once over, he sighed. “Cut the crap, Blaine. You just want to keep Kurt.”
“You’re making him sound like a thing to be kept. It’s not like that,” I contended.
“Whatever. You want to keep him close. Fine. I get it. But there’s nothing in it for me, so why should I bother?”
I bit my lower lip and looked away. “What do you want?” My heart thumped because I had a pretty good idea of what Thad would ask for.
“Oh c’mon, Blaine, don’t play coy. You know what I want.”
I swallowed hard as he gripped my shoulder and then let his hand slide down to squeeze my bicep lightly. He leaned in to my side, his mouth close to my ear so all I could breathe in was the light spicy aftershave he was wearing.
“I want you. It’s always been you. Uh uh,” he scolded as I started to interrupt him. “Just think about it for a minute. We could be so good together, Blaine. We could rule the Warblers.”
My mind was racing as his lips hovered beside my ear. His hot breath traced a path as he leaned in further and flicked his tongue over my earlobe. Could I do this?
My eyes slid shut as my stomach roiled. I already knew the answer.
“I want you to be my boyfriend.”
My eyes snapped open as I choked. Shaking my head, I echoed the answer that was blaring in my mind. “No. I-I can’t. Uh, do that. Not that.”
He let go immediately and stepped back. “Fine,” he said throwing his hands up. “I’m sure that you’ll be very happy with Trent as a roommate. I hear good things about him.” Thad took another step backwards, turning to leave.
“Plus, I’m sure I could work on getting Kurt nice and comfortable with me. Who knows, I could even talk him into coming to a party with me. What do you think, Blaine? No doubt he’d like to meet all those OSU jocks up close and personal.”
You wouldn’t dare.
Thad started to meander away, still talking, “All those muscles…the poor boy would be all giddy, I’m sure. In fact, it might be just the thing to loosen him up.”
“Wait!”
He turned back to me and slowly slid his hands into his pockets.
I couldn’t work my jaw. No words would come out.
“Well?”
Do something! My brain screamed, making me wince.
“Forget it,” Thad said with a wave of his hand as he spun on his heel and started to stride away.
“Wait!” I cried out, taking a shuddering a breath as I crossed my arms. “I can, uh. I can’t be your boyfriend.”
Thad huffed out a frustrated breath as he lurched to a stop, barely turning his head to me. “Like I said. Forget it, Blaine.”
“But! Thad, wait. How ‘bout? How about we, I don’t know...What if we hook up?”
Thad looked around the hall quickly to see if anyone was listening in before spinning around and taking several strides back towards me.
“Now you’re talking,” Thad smirked and shot another look over his shoulder as he took me by the arm, pushing me up against the wall. “When?”
“Christmas.”
“Nope. We’re going away and, no doubt, so is your family. Sooner.”
“Uh, okay. This weekend?”
“That’s more like it. So…,” he licked his bottom lip, sucking it in and let it go slowly, “…what are your terms?”
“Um, I could-I could blow you.”
Thad frowned and stepped back again. “You’ve got to be kidding. Look, if you’re not serious about this, you just had to say so.” He brushed his sleeve off and adjusted his cuffs as a disinterested look crossed his face.
“Warblers! You’ve got five minutes to come and confirm your switches with me before I leave this room and they become final!” Wes shouted out to the room, his voice carrying out over the crowd and into the hall.
Shit. You are not helping, Wes!
Thad glanced at me with an eyebrow cocked. “Are you serious now, Blaine?”
I gave half a nod as I looked at the floor, feeling him move in close to me.
He ran my tie between his thumb and forefinger, stroking downwards, pulling it out of my blazer. “You have a fantastic ass, Blaine. Has anyone told you that?” His fingers wound around the bottom of my tie as his other hand stroked at my thigh, shifting to slide along the underside of my bum. “How bad do you want it? C’mon, you can tell me.”
He stroked a thumb over my butt cheek in slow circles as he spoke lowly, leaning in so I could feel his breath on my cheek. “It’s him, isn’t it? The one you told me about. Does he know yet? Hmm? C’mon, Blaine. How bad to you want him?” Thad asked as he stopped stroking and pinched me, making me pull in a quick breath.
“Name your price.” Let’s just get this over with.
“You, naked and in my bed. Tomorrow.”
I nodded in understanding. “Wait. I can’t tomorrow. The audition, remember?” I said softly, still keeping my eyes averted.
“Then I hope you don’t have any plans tonight.”
“Tonight?”
“Mm hmm.”
“Two minutes, Warblers!” Wes sang out again.
“Tonight and tonight only,” I answered. “This will only ever be a one time thing.”
“If you say so. You might find you change your mind later though.” Thad smirked as I pulled my tie free from his grasp. “You should give me a taste test,” he mumbled, his nose pressed against my cheekbone.
I pulled away, re-situating my tie. “We need to confirm with Wes otherwise neither of us will get what we want, will we?” I took a few steps down the corridor before stopping to make sure he would follow. “Let’s go!” I demanded. I didn’t just make a fool out of myself for nothing. When Thad pushed off from the wall, I headed for the Common Room in search of Wes.
“Okay Warblers, I’m calling ti-”
“Wait! We’re switching!” I called out to Wes, interrupting him and ignoring Jeff’s snickering at the insinuation.
“Fine. Who’s going where?” Wes inquired with a heaving sigh.
Surprising me, Thad spoke up first, telling Wes that he was going to have Trent move in because Kurt was such a recent transfer. Wes kept looking at me as I simply nodded dumbly in unison with Thad’s assessment. He gave a final nod and told us each to confirm with our roommates, letting Thad wander off before he rounded on me.
“Really, Blaine? Of everyone, I didn’t expect this from you.”
I shrugged. “It’s in our best interests, Wes. For Regionals.” Okay, it’s in my best interests. Backing away, I held my palms up and gave him a half-hearted smile.
Wes could take his disappointed tone and scowl and shove it. I’ve got bigger, more arrogant, fish to fry tonight.
Finally able to walk back to my room, I pulled my phone out and shot a text off to Kurt to let in on the good news that I was still his roommate. Or that he was mine. Or we were each other’s. I don’t know. I just really need...something right now. To take the edge off before I have to…do what I have to do.
***
This isn’t working! I’ve been hitting this stupid bag for close to an hour and I still feel as wound up as when I started. Maybe I should go for a run?
Ugh, but it’s freezing outside. Forget it.
Maybe I should just go shower and give myself half a tablet?
And give him complete control? No way!
But I won’t remember it.
But I don’t want him to be able to do anything else with me and besides, just once. We’re only doing this once. There will be no second or third rounds for Thad. No fucking way.
Okay. No pill. What about a drink? I need to relax. It’ll hurt if I can’t relax.
Where can I get something from? Think!
Mrs Larson’s office! All contraband ends up in her office. I just need to wait until everyone goes to dinner.
***
Walking quickly into the Dining Hall with the meager assortment of people still stuck at school on a Friday night, I grabbed a couple of cookies and a Coke. It’ll do. Heading out to make the trip to the Deputy Headmaster’s office, I managed to walk straight into Thad.
“You’re not staying for dinner? We could make a date of it.” His playful tone grated on my nerves.
“I’m heading up to, uh, get ready. I’ll see you in an hour, right?”
“Right. You’re not backing out on me, are you?” He asked, narrowing his eyes.
I shook my head slowly. “No. I guess I’m just...” Nauseous. “Nervous.”
Thad frowned. “It’ll be okay, Blaine. You’ll like it. I’ll make sure you do.” He put his hand on my shoulder and squeezed as I side eyed it. “You might surprise yourself and love it.”
I didn’t have the words and simply let my eyebrows rise up to convey my skepticism. Thad simply chuckled, slapped my arm lightly and walked away.
Making my way out into the corridor, I slipped the napkin covered cookies into one pocket and the soda into the other whilst checking that the skeleton key was still there. It’s time.
It took just a few minutes and a nod to some stragglers heading for dinner before I made it over to the Admin building.
A quick glance confirmed no one was around, so I unlocked a side door and slipped into the gloomy hallway. I knew I had some time. The cleaning staff would be making their way through the classrooms before doing the offices and then finally the Dining Hall. The security cameras were only on the main entrance and the parking lot, so as long as I stayed clear of the front desk, I should be invisible.
Walking with purpose, I strode down the hallway until I came to the double doors that separated the smaller break out rooms and teacher’s offices from the deserted offices of the Deputy and Headmaster. I slid my hand back into my sleeve and pushed on the security glass with a cloth covered fist. No prints.
A half dozen steps brought me to my final destination. I took another look around before slotting the key into the lock and turning it slowly. With the click of the lock, my thumping heartbeat drowned out everything else. There was still time to turn back.
I need it.
My shirt covered hand eased the door knob around, cracking open the door. The office was dark and silent. I slipped inside quickly and pushed the door almost closed behind me.
After a quick scan of the office, I headed for a large cabinet tucked into the corner of the room. I breathed a sigh of relief. A small brass key was sitting in the lock. Thank God. I hadn’t even thought about that.
Opening the cabinet door, nirvana beckoned me. I was greeted by a huge collection of hip flasks, 40oz bottles of whiskey and vodka, a stack of cell phones, dirty magazines, several weapons and, wait...is that a blow up sheep? I couldn’t help but giggle quietly as the anxiety and the absurd let their tight grip on my heart go for a moment.
Whiskey or vodka?
Neither would be missed in the collection of bottles and I daren’t take one of the hip flasks. It may be recognized at some point down the road and I have all the drama I can handle right now.
Whiskey, it is.
I slid out a half full bottle and moved another to take its place. Time to go.
Quickly, I locked the cabinet and then slipped the bottle into my jacket, keeping it nestled in the crook of my arm. Shutting and locking Mrs Larson’s door, I pocketed the key and moved swiftly back the way I came.
By the time I was able to shut and lock my dorm room door behind me, my heart was in my throat and sweat was beading on my upper lip. I made it! Glancing at the clock, I realized I only had 30 minutes to shower, prep and knock back a whiskey and Coke with my cookies.
Fuck it.
I unscrewed the lid and took a swig straight from the bottle. I just need to calm down.
I took another, the heat of the liquor burning my throat. Thank God there isn’t a competition to worry about. Wes would be pissed. Crap, my audition tomorrow! Fuck it. It’s not like this is going to ruin my voice. Besides, soon I’ll have other, more unsanitary, things in my mouth to worry about. Ugh
I downed one more mouthful before setting the bottle on the desk and stripping off to shower.
***
I checked the time again. Five more minutes. Enough time to finish my drink.
Knocking back the last of the foul tasting Coke mix, I grabbed the much lighter whiskey bottle and sipped it to get the syrupy taste out of my mouth. I fumbled as I put the bottle back down on the bedside table. Time to face the music.
The hallway was a blur of wood and that horrible red carpet with the swirly pattern. I didn’t really pay too much attention but it felt like the quickest trip ever to Thad’s room.
I knocked on his door while it helped hold me up at the same time. Whoa, knuckles are awesome. Does everyone have hair on their fingers? And then the world turned upside down.
“Hiiii,” I waved at Thad lazily from my new spot on the floor.
“You have got to be shitting me.”
“I do?” I groaned as he pulled me up and then steered me to a bed.
“Jesus, how much have you had to drink?”
“Dunno. Like, only two. Or three.”
“Uh huh, and I’m the Pope.”
“Whoa, really? That’s huge, Th-Tha-Tad!”
“No! Not really!”
“Oh. Wassit ‘cos of your age? You are a bit young for a full time job. And would you really wanna wear that hat? And you’d hafta drive around in the poopmobile. Hah! Ha ha ha, the poopmobile.”
“Fuck. You are totally wasted, aren’t you?”
“Hngh. Maybe.” I grinned as he palmed my dick. “Nah, just kidding. I’m totally wasted!” I flopped back on the bed happily.
“You do realize this little stunt is not going to get you out of this, right Blaine?”
“I wasn’t tryna get out of it, Tad. Tad? Tad. Tad! Tad? Your name is weird. Tad. Huh. Yup, really weird.” I tried to push off my shoes while he leaned over me but somehow I managed to knee him in the ribs. “Ohmigosh! Are you okay?!”
“Fuck!”
“Sorry! Sorry! Lemme kiss it better, ‘kay?” I insisted as I crawled over to where he had dropped onto the bed. “Lemme, ‘kay? Just lemme. I’m sorry.”
He squawked as my knee landed on his thigh while I clambered over him, pushing his shirt up to expose his ribs. I puckered my lips and pouted. “Where?” I asked, making fish lips when he pointed to his side. I hunkered down and pressed my lips to the tender skin across his ribs. “Mwah! S’all better,” I sang. Feeling him move beneath me as he laughed, I kept dropping kisses across his stomach. “See? S’not so bad now, right?”
Thad pulled me up but I flopped down on my side next to him instead. “You’re an idiot. A goofy, sexy idiot.”
I blinked at him. “Did you jus’ call me Goofy?”
“Mmm. If we wait, will you sober up?” he asked as he stroked my face.
“Prob’ly not. I’m kinda sleepy.”
“Then we better move, because there’s sex to be had. No sleeping allowed.”
“Sex?”
“Mm hmm. Have you had sex before?”
“Yep!”
“Really? Who with?”
“Nuh uh. Can’t say!”
“You won’t tell me? Your very good friend?”
“Yannot my best friend though. Kurtz my best friend!”
“I know. Kurt’s very nice.”
“Kurtz wonderful.”
“Yes he is. Have you had sex with Kurt?”
“Shhh. Itsa secret.”
“It is?”
“Is what?”
“A secret”
“What’s a secret?”
“That you’ve had sex with Kurt.”
“I have?”
“Haven’t you?”
“Shhh. Itsa secret.”
“Oh boy. Okay, whatever. Time to take your clothes off, Blaine.”
“Whafor?”
“We’re going to have sex.”
“Seriously?”
“Yes! That’s why you’re here.”
“OH! Riiight! I forgot,” I smacked myself in the temple. I came here for a reason, dummy. “’Cos of Kurt, right?”
“Right. Because you want Kurt to stay with you.”
“Kurtz wants to stays with me.”
“I’m sure he does. Arms up,” he pulled my shirt off and tossed off the side of the bed. “Who wouldn’t want to room with the hottest boy in Dalton?”
“Huh?”
“Pants too.”
“Oh. Yup.” I laughed when he collected my underwear as he tugged my pants off. “Whoops!” Chortling, I covered my cock up.
“It’s okay, Blaine. My turn, see?”
I blinked heavily as he stripped. Whoa, dick alert!
Thad tugged my hand to get me to lie on the bed properly. He pushed and pulled me until my head was on the pillow and my legs were spread. I watched him as he crawled between my legs and slid over top of me to peck my lips. I looped my arms around his neck and closed my eyes as he kissed me properly, with tongue and everything.
“Mmm, that’s nice. More please,” I mumbled, turning my face up at him when he pulled away.
“See? I knew you’d like it.”
When he broke away to kiss along my jaw and snuffle against my ear, I had to tell him, “But I always like kissin’. Doesn’t mean I was gonna like kissin’ you.”
“But you like kissing me now, don’t you?”
“Uh huh,” I whined, wriggling against him. “Put your arms ‘round me, ‘kay? Hold me tight.” I hummed into the next kiss when he did what I asked, his fingertips pressing into my back as I slipped my hands down to smooth them along his sides.
He moaned as we moved against each other like a lazy ocean while we kissed. Eventually, he stopped kissing my mouth and moved down my neck as his fingertips tickled my inner thighs. I gasped when he bit me and a finger slid straight into my ass.
“Oh God. You already prepped? Fuck, that’s so hot.”
I giggled as his fingers tickled me again and more slid inside.
“You used a lot of lube, babe,” he remarked, sliding down my body to watch his fingers move in and out of me.
“Wanted to be ready,” I panted as I rocked back against his touch.
“Yeah? You ready for me, Blaine?”
“Feels go-oh. Don’t stop,” I mumbled as he pulled his hand away and clambered onto his knees, getting close enough to rub his cock across my rim.
“Shhhh, this will feel better.”
Oh. “Wait. You gotta condom on, right?”
“Um.”
“Nope! No way. No condom, no sex,” I grumped as I struggled to sit up. Not gonna make that mistake again.
“Okay! Okay, wait. Um…”
I rubbed at my eye and grumbled out, “My front pocket. In my pants.”
Thad disappeared for a moment but bounced back on the bed triumphantly with a foil packet in his hand. “You came prepared!”
“Yeah, Imma regular boy scout,” I sassed as I watched Thad rip the packet open and put the condom on.
He shuffled forward on his knees. “Shall we…like this?” he asked, holding his dick at the ready.
I nodded and flopped back on the bed. I can do this. I lay there lax as Thad’s cock pushed in to me. It’s the only way. His groaning faded into the background as he eased in and out in short movements. I kept concentrating on the drag as he pulled out. It’s nice.
He grabbed my ankles and pulled my legs up to rest against his shoulders as he started to pump into me with faster, deeper strokes. The loud whine that followed made me frown. Where had that come from? Then Thad leaned forward, letting my legs slip off him and started kissing my chest.
“See, I knew you’d like it,” he panted as he thrust in harder. The whine rattled in my ears again and I realized it was coming from me. Thad slid down to wrap his arms around me, mouthing at my neck, as his hips rolled against me.
This feels amazing. I bucked up against him, starting to work my body with his, letting him drive in deep while he mumbled my name over and over. I kept my eyes shut, trying to block his voice out, as I thought about Kurt doing this with me, hearing Kurt say my name and hold me close like this.
“Fuck, don’t stop,” I groaned. “Don’t stop.”
The deep chuckle in my ear made my skin prickle but the slam of his body into mine sent a wave of pleasure through me. “Please,” I started to beg with my eyes screwed shut, holding on tight. More. Need to come, Kurt. Lemme come.
The words he grunted out were lost on me. I could only concentrate on the sensation of the cock driving in and out, the drag of my dick over his stomach as we moved together. I clung onto him tightly as my orgasm gained pace, finally bursting through as our mouths crashed against each other. I could feel his teeth pull at my bottom lip as my body spasmed against his.
I turned my head away as he roared his satisfaction and spilled into the condom. He panted against my neck as we lay still, breathless and sated for several wordless minutes.
“You can sleep here tonight, if you want.”
Remembering who I was with had me wriggling against him uncomfortably. I pushed Thad off me and rolled to the edge of the bed, my head still fuzzy, as he fumbled with the condom.
“You okay?” Thad asked as he trailed a finger down my spine.
“Yeah. I-” I ran a hand through my hair, trying to get it to sit back down properly. I was lost for words. That was the first time I was with someone while we were both awake. And I liked it. With Thad. I shook my head to clear my foggy mind. I couldn’t like it. Not with him. This isn’t the way it was supposed to be.
“You don’t want to stay?”
I shook my head in reply and he made a confused noise behind me. “What,” I asked tiredly, hearing him shuffle around on the bed.
“I…I thought you had a good time.”
My gaze found the floor, the color of the carpet blurring in front of my eyes. “Look, Thad…I-That was- …Yeah, I did,” I said with a nod. “But I-” I shook my head again and yawned, rolling my shoulders and stretching my arms until my hands curled in against the back of my head.
“C’mon, Blaine. Lie down. You need to sleep.”
“But I don’ wanna…” I gave up speaking as Thad’s hand pulled at my shoulder and my body gave way, falling back. He pulled me close and wrapped an arm around me.
“You don’t want what?”
“I should go.”
“You should close your eyes now. I won’t try anything, I swear.” I made a squeaky grunt of disbelief which made Thad smile as he nuzzled my jaw. “I’m sleepy too, y’know. ‘Cos I did all the work.”
I snorted as Thad’s thumb stroked over a rib and lulled me into closing my eyes. He hooked his leg over my thigh and sighed contentedly.
I shouldn’t sleep here.
***
It was cold when I woke up. I couldn’t tell how long I’d be conked out but Thad was in the same position as earlier, tucked into my side.
I eased myself out from under his arm and managed to get dressed without too much noise. The trip back to my room was swift and silent with my shoes tucked under my arm. I tried to keep my mind just as quiet, not willing to think about all that had happened tonight until I was in the safety of my room.
Pulling up at my door, I fished for the key in my pocket but paused when I couldn’t find it. A twist of the handle confirmed my earlier sloppy actions. I’d left the door unlocked. Stupid.
I dropped my shoes by the closet and stripped off for another shower. The smell of whiskey and sex making me feel sick.
Under the hot spray of the shower, my mind finally kicked into gear. I’d liked it. Oh, who am I kidding? I loved it. I just wish it had been with someone other than Thad. You mean you wish it had been with Kurt.
My mouth turned down as I thought of him. I’ll never have that with Kurt. Why on earth would he want someone like me?
I ducked my head and let the water beat against the base of my skull as I lost control and let my tears fall. All I’ll ever do is hurt him. The curl of my open mouth as I cried caught the falling water flowing down my face. He deserves so much more than that. I pushed my face into the crook of my elbow to save myself from choking as I bawled helplessly. Than me.
Shuffling to my bed, I lay there in the dark thinking in circles.
Did I do the right thing for the wrong reasons or the wrong thing for the right reasons?
***
Part Twenty Four>>
Additional warnings: There is an explicit POV of a dub-con experience and fallout in this part (not involving Kurt) as well as underage drinking.
***
My heart was racing. Three rooms left to draw and neither Kurt nor I had been pulled from the bowl yet.
“And the next person is…” Wes unraveled the piece of paper, “Blaine!”
My heart thudded, the sound reverberating in my throat. This is it.
“Your new roommate is…”
Please. Please. Please let it be Kurt.
“Trent!” Wes called out to a few cheers.
Oh. No, no, no. No! My stomach roiled at the thought of not waking up and seeing Kurt.
“Okay and we have Thad up next! And your roommate will be…”
Please, no. Not Kurt. Not my Kurt. Not my-
“Kurt!”
FUCK! I clenched my fists in my pockets as I stayed perched on the arm of the sofa. Keep it together, man.
“That leaves Flint…who will be rooming with Jeff!” Wes paused as Jeff cheered for himself before continuing. “Warblers, remember you may negotiate to switch rooms but I must stress that the point of this is a bonding exercise. So negotiating to keep your current roommate will be frowned upon! The same goes for those wanting to share a room with their boyfriend!” Wes said as he shot a glare and a point of his gavel towards Nick. A murmur of ascension rippled through the assembled boys before Wes slammed his gavel down one final time to end proceedings.
Jeff shrugged as Nick took a seat beside him on the couch. “I don’t even know why he bothers to say that every time. We’ve had that talk. We don’t want to live together.”
“Wait? You don’t?” I asked.
“No way! You’ve seen how messy Jeff is. It’d drive me crazy in a heartbeat,” Nick said with a frown.
“And his collection of hair products is more extensive than yours, Blaine,” Jeff added as he exchanged a cautious look with his boyfriend. “So, uh, you’re losing Kurt-”
“Not if I can help it,” I chimed in as an opportunity wandered past me. “Hey Thad! Wait up!”
Crossing the room, I led Thad away from the fray with my arm slung carelessly over his shoulders. I tried to explain that Kurt was still finding his feet and that uprooting him from the room that he was just getting comfortable in might not be the best thing for him, finally ending it with a play to Thad’s sympathies. “He’s still a little fragile.”
“Yeah, but getting to know someone else might bring him more out of his shell,” Thad countered.
“I don’t know,” I scrambled. “Look at how he over-reacted the other week at lunch. And that was Jeff! Everyone likes Jeff. Plus I was right there, Thad, and I couldn’t keep him calm. Now, you two haven’t been the friendliest and I just think that it might make him shut down a little more.”
“So, what do you want to do? Have him room with Trent?”
“Oh.” Shit! I hadn’t thought of that. “Um…no. I was thinking that maybe Trent could, uh, room with you?”
Thad arched his eyebrow at me suspiciously as he crossed his arms. Giving me the once over, he sighed. “Cut the crap, Blaine. You just want to keep Kurt.”
“You’re making him sound like a thing to be kept. It’s not like that,” I contended.
“Whatever. You want to keep him close. Fine. I get it. But there’s nothing in it for me, so why should I bother?”
I bit my lower lip and looked away. “What do you want?” My heart thumped because I had a pretty good idea of what Thad would ask for.
“Oh c’mon, Blaine, don’t play coy. You know what I want.”
I swallowed hard as he gripped my shoulder and then let his hand slide down to squeeze my bicep lightly. He leaned in to my side, his mouth close to my ear so all I could breathe in was the light spicy aftershave he was wearing.
“I want you. It’s always been you. Uh uh,” he scolded as I started to interrupt him. “Just think about it for a minute. We could be so good together, Blaine. We could rule the Warblers.”
My mind was racing as his lips hovered beside my ear. His hot breath traced a path as he leaned in further and flicked his tongue over my earlobe. Could I do this?
My eyes slid shut as my stomach roiled. I already knew the answer.
“I want you to be my boyfriend.”
My eyes snapped open as I choked. Shaking my head, I echoed the answer that was blaring in my mind. “No. I-I can’t. Uh, do that. Not that.”
He let go immediately and stepped back. “Fine,” he said throwing his hands up. “I’m sure that you’ll be very happy with Trent as a roommate. I hear good things about him.” Thad took another step backwards, turning to leave.
“Plus, I’m sure I could work on getting Kurt nice and comfortable with me. Who knows, I could even talk him into coming to a party with me. What do you think, Blaine? No doubt he’d like to meet all those OSU jocks up close and personal.”
You wouldn’t dare.
Thad started to meander away, still talking, “All those muscles…the poor boy would be all giddy, I’m sure. In fact, it might be just the thing to loosen him up.”
“Wait!”
He turned back to me and slowly slid his hands into his pockets.
I couldn’t work my jaw. No words would come out.
“Well?”
Do something! My brain screamed, making me wince.
“Forget it,” Thad said with a wave of his hand as he spun on his heel and started to stride away.
“Wait!” I cried out, taking a shuddering a breath as I crossed my arms. “I can, uh. I can’t be your boyfriend.”
Thad huffed out a frustrated breath as he lurched to a stop, barely turning his head to me. “Like I said. Forget it, Blaine.”
“But! Thad, wait. How ‘bout? How about we, I don’t know...What if we hook up?”
Thad looked around the hall quickly to see if anyone was listening in before spinning around and taking several strides back towards me.
“Now you’re talking,” Thad smirked and shot another look over his shoulder as he took me by the arm, pushing me up against the wall. “When?”
“Christmas.”
“Nope. We’re going away and, no doubt, so is your family. Sooner.”
“Uh, okay. This weekend?”
“That’s more like it. So…,” he licked his bottom lip, sucking it in and let it go slowly, “…what are your terms?”
“Um, I could-I could blow you.”
Thad frowned and stepped back again. “You’ve got to be kidding. Look, if you’re not serious about this, you just had to say so.” He brushed his sleeve off and adjusted his cuffs as a disinterested look crossed his face.
“Warblers! You’ve got five minutes to come and confirm your switches with me before I leave this room and they become final!” Wes shouted out to the room, his voice carrying out over the crowd and into the hall.
Shit. You are not helping, Wes!
Thad glanced at me with an eyebrow cocked. “Are you serious now, Blaine?”
I gave half a nod as I looked at the floor, feeling him move in close to me.
He ran my tie between his thumb and forefinger, stroking downwards, pulling it out of my blazer. “You have a fantastic ass, Blaine. Has anyone told you that?” His fingers wound around the bottom of my tie as his other hand stroked at my thigh, shifting to slide along the underside of my bum. “How bad do you want it? C’mon, you can tell me.”
He stroked a thumb over my butt cheek in slow circles as he spoke lowly, leaning in so I could feel his breath on my cheek. “It’s him, isn’t it? The one you told me about. Does he know yet? Hmm? C’mon, Blaine. How bad to you want him?” Thad asked as he stopped stroking and pinched me, making me pull in a quick breath.
“Name your price.” Let’s just get this over with.
“You, naked and in my bed. Tomorrow.”
I nodded in understanding. “Wait. I can’t tomorrow. The audition, remember?” I said softly, still keeping my eyes averted.
“Then I hope you don’t have any plans tonight.”
“Tonight?”
“Mm hmm.”
“Two minutes, Warblers!” Wes sang out again.
“Tonight and tonight only,” I answered. “This will only ever be a one time thing.”
“If you say so. You might find you change your mind later though.” Thad smirked as I pulled my tie free from his grasp. “You should give me a taste test,” he mumbled, his nose pressed against my cheekbone.
I pulled away, re-situating my tie. “We need to confirm with Wes otherwise neither of us will get what we want, will we?” I took a few steps down the corridor before stopping to make sure he would follow. “Let’s go!” I demanded. I didn’t just make a fool out of myself for nothing. When Thad pushed off from the wall, I headed for the Common Room in search of Wes.
“Okay Warblers, I’m calling ti-”
“Wait! We’re switching!” I called out to Wes, interrupting him and ignoring Jeff’s snickering at the insinuation.
“Fine. Who’s going where?” Wes inquired with a heaving sigh.
Surprising me, Thad spoke up first, telling Wes that he was going to have Trent move in because Kurt was such a recent transfer. Wes kept looking at me as I simply nodded dumbly in unison with Thad’s assessment. He gave a final nod and told us each to confirm with our roommates, letting Thad wander off before he rounded on me.
“Really, Blaine? Of everyone, I didn’t expect this from you.”
I shrugged. “It’s in our best interests, Wes. For Regionals.” Okay, it’s in my best interests. Backing away, I held my palms up and gave him a half-hearted smile.
Wes could take his disappointed tone and scowl and shove it. I’ve got bigger, more arrogant, fish to fry tonight.
Finally able to walk back to my room, I pulled my phone out and shot a text off to Kurt to let in on the good news that I was still his roommate. Or that he was mine. Or we were each other’s. I don’t know. I just really need...something right now. To take the edge off before I have to…do what I have to do.
***
This isn’t working! I’ve been hitting this stupid bag for close to an hour and I still feel as wound up as when I started. Maybe I should go for a run?
Ugh, but it’s freezing outside. Forget it.
Maybe I should just go shower and give myself half a tablet?
And give him complete control? No way!
But I won’t remember it.
But I don’t want him to be able to do anything else with me and besides, just once. We’re only doing this once. There will be no second or third rounds for Thad. No fucking way.
Okay. No pill. What about a drink? I need to relax. It’ll hurt if I can’t relax.
Where can I get something from? Think!
Mrs Larson’s office! All contraband ends up in her office. I just need to wait until everyone goes to dinner.
***
Walking quickly into the Dining Hall with the meager assortment of people still stuck at school on a Friday night, I grabbed a couple of cookies and a Coke. It’ll do. Heading out to make the trip to the Deputy Headmaster’s office, I managed to walk straight into Thad.
“You’re not staying for dinner? We could make a date of it.” His playful tone grated on my nerves.
“I’m heading up to, uh, get ready. I’ll see you in an hour, right?”
“Right. You’re not backing out on me, are you?” He asked, narrowing his eyes.
I shook my head slowly. “No. I guess I’m just...” Nauseous. “Nervous.”
Thad frowned. “It’ll be okay, Blaine. You’ll like it. I’ll make sure you do.” He put his hand on my shoulder and squeezed as I side eyed it. “You might surprise yourself and love it.”
I didn’t have the words and simply let my eyebrows rise up to convey my skepticism. Thad simply chuckled, slapped my arm lightly and walked away.
Making my way out into the corridor, I slipped the napkin covered cookies into one pocket and the soda into the other whilst checking that the skeleton key was still there. It’s time.
It took just a few minutes and a nod to some stragglers heading for dinner before I made it over to the Admin building.
A quick glance confirmed no one was around, so I unlocked a side door and slipped into the gloomy hallway. I knew I had some time. The cleaning staff would be making their way through the classrooms before doing the offices and then finally the Dining Hall. The security cameras were only on the main entrance and the parking lot, so as long as I stayed clear of the front desk, I should be invisible.
Walking with purpose, I strode down the hallway until I came to the double doors that separated the smaller break out rooms and teacher’s offices from the deserted offices of the Deputy and Headmaster. I slid my hand back into my sleeve and pushed on the security glass with a cloth covered fist. No prints.
A half dozen steps brought me to my final destination. I took another look around before slotting the key into the lock and turning it slowly. With the click of the lock, my thumping heartbeat drowned out everything else. There was still time to turn back.
I need it.
My shirt covered hand eased the door knob around, cracking open the door. The office was dark and silent. I slipped inside quickly and pushed the door almost closed behind me.
After a quick scan of the office, I headed for a large cabinet tucked into the corner of the room. I breathed a sigh of relief. A small brass key was sitting in the lock. Thank God. I hadn’t even thought about that.
Opening the cabinet door, nirvana beckoned me. I was greeted by a huge collection of hip flasks, 40oz bottles of whiskey and vodka, a stack of cell phones, dirty magazines, several weapons and, wait...is that a blow up sheep? I couldn’t help but giggle quietly as the anxiety and the absurd let their tight grip on my heart go for a moment.
Whiskey or vodka?
Neither would be missed in the collection of bottles and I daren’t take one of the hip flasks. It may be recognized at some point down the road and I have all the drama I can handle right now.
Whiskey, it is.
I slid out a half full bottle and moved another to take its place. Time to go.
Quickly, I locked the cabinet and then slipped the bottle into my jacket, keeping it nestled in the crook of my arm. Shutting and locking Mrs Larson’s door, I pocketed the key and moved swiftly back the way I came.
By the time I was able to shut and lock my dorm room door behind me, my heart was in my throat and sweat was beading on my upper lip. I made it! Glancing at the clock, I realized I only had 30 minutes to shower, prep and knock back a whiskey and Coke with my cookies.
Fuck it.
I unscrewed the lid and took a swig straight from the bottle. I just need to calm down.
I took another, the heat of the liquor burning my throat. Thank God there isn’t a competition to worry about. Wes would be pissed. Crap, my audition tomorrow! Fuck it. It’s not like this is going to ruin my voice. Besides, soon I’ll have other, more unsanitary, things in my mouth to worry about. Ugh
I downed one more mouthful before setting the bottle on the desk and stripping off to shower.
***
I checked the time again. Five more minutes. Enough time to finish my drink.
Knocking back the last of the foul tasting Coke mix, I grabbed the much lighter whiskey bottle and sipped it to get the syrupy taste out of my mouth. I fumbled as I put the bottle back down on the bedside table. Time to face the music.
The hallway was a blur of wood and that horrible red carpet with the swirly pattern. I didn’t really pay too much attention but it felt like the quickest trip ever to Thad’s room.
I knocked on his door while it helped hold me up at the same time. Whoa, knuckles are awesome. Does everyone have hair on their fingers? And then the world turned upside down.
“Hiiii,” I waved at Thad lazily from my new spot on the floor.
“You have got to be shitting me.”
“I do?” I groaned as he pulled me up and then steered me to a bed.
“Jesus, how much have you had to drink?”
“Dunno. Like, only two. Or three.”
“Uh huh, and I’m the Pope.”
“Whoa, really? That’s huge, Th-Tha-Tad!”
“No! Not really!”
“Oh. Wassit ‘cos of your age? You are a bit young for a full time job. And would you really wanna wear that hat? And you’d hafta drive around in the poopmobile. Hah! Ha ha ha, the poopmobile.”
“Fuck. You are totally wasted, aren’t you?”
“Hngh. Maybe.” I grinned as he palmed my dick. “Nah, just kidding. I’m totally wasted!” I flopped back on the bed happily.
“You do realize this little stunt is not going to get you out of this, right Blaine?”
“I wasn’t tryna get out of it, Tad. Tad? Tad. Tad! Tad? Your name is weird. Tad. Huh. Yup, really weird.” I tried to push off my shoes while he leaned over me but somehow I managed to knee him in the ribs. “Ohmigosh! Are you okay?!”
“Fuck!”
“Sorry! Sorry! Lemme kiss it better, ‘kay?” I insisted as I crawled over to where he had dropped onto the bed. “Lemme, ‘kay? Just lemme. I’m sorry.”
He squawked as my knee landed on his thigh while I clambered over him, pushing his shirt up to expose his ribs. I puckered my lips and pouted. “Where?” I asked, making fish lips when he pointed to his side. I hunkered down and pressed my lips to the tender skin across his ribs. “Mwah! S’all better,” I sang. Feeling him move beneath me as he laughed, I kept dropping kisses across his stomach. “See? S’not so bad now, right?”
Thad pulled me up but I flopped down on my side next to him instead. “You’re an idiot. A goofy, sexy idiot.”
I blinked at him. “Did you jus’ call me Goofy?”
“Mmm. If we wait, will you sober up?” he asked as he stroked my face.
“Prob’ly not. I’m kinda sleepy.”
“Then we better move, because there’s sex to be had. No sleeping allowed.”
“Sex?”
“Mm hmm. Have you had sex before?”
“Yep!”
“Really? Who with?”
“Nuh uh. Can’t say!”
“You won’t tell me? Your very good friend?”
“Yannot my best friend though. Kurtz my best friend!”
“I know. Kurt’s very nice.”
“Kurtz wonderful.”
“Yes he is. Have you had sex with Kurt?”
“Shhh. Itsa secret.”
“It is?”
“Is what?”
“A secret”
“What’s a secret?”
“That you’ve had sex with Kurt.”
“I have?”
“Haven’t you?”
“Shhh. Itsa secret.”
“Oh boy. Okay, whatever. Time to take your clothes off, Blaine.”
“Whafor?”
“We’re going to have sex.”
“Seriously?”
“Yes! That’s why you’re here.”
“OH! Riiight! I forgot,” I smacked myself in the temple. I came here for a reason, dummy. “’Cos of Kurt, right?”
“Right. Because you want Kurt to stay with you.”
“Kurtz wants to stays with me.”
“I’m sure he does. Arms up,” he pulled my shirt off and tossed off the side of the bed. “Who wouldn’t want to room with the hottest boy in Dalton?”
“Huh?”
“Pants too.”
“Oh. Yup.” I laughed when he collected my underwear as he tugged my pants off. “Whoops!” Chortling, I covered my cock up.
“It’s okay, Blaine. My turn, see?”
I blinked heavily as he stripped. Whoa, dick alert!
Thad tugged my hand to get me to lie on the bed properly. He pushed and pulled me until my head was on the pillow and my legs were spread. I watched him as he crawled between my legs and slid over top of me to peck my lips. I looped my arms around his neck and closed my eyes as he kissed me properly, with tongue and everything.
“Mmm, that’s nice. More please,” I mumbled, turning my face up at him when he pulled away.
“See? I knew you’d like it.”
When he broke away to kiss along my jaw and snuffle against my ear, I had to tell him, “But I always like kissin’. Doesn’t mean I was gonna like kissin’ you.”
“But you like kissing me now, don’t you?”
“Uh huh,” I whined, wriggling against him. “Put your arms ‘round me, ‘kay? Hold me tight.” I hummed into the next kiss when he did what I asked, his fingertips pressing into my back as I slipped my hands down to smooth them along his sides.
He moaned as we moved against each other like a lazy ocean while we kissed. Eventually, he stopped kissing my mouth and moved down my neck as his fingertips tickled my inner thighs. I gasped when he bit me and a finger slid straight into my ass.
“Oh God. You already prepped? Fuck, that’s so hot.”
I giggled as his fingers tickled me again and more slid inside.
“You used a lot of lube, babe,” he remarked, sliding down my body to watch his fingers move in and out of me.
“Wanted to be ready,” I panted as I rocked back against his touch.
“Yeah? You ready for me, Blaine?”
“Feels go-oh. Don’t stop,” I mumbled as he pulled his hand away and clambered onto his knees, getting close enough to rub his cock across my rim.
“Shhhh, this will feel better.”
Oh. “Wait. You gotta condom on, right?”
“Um.”
“Nope! No way. No condom, no sex,” I grumped as I struggled to sit up. Not gonna make that mistake again.
“Okay! Okay, wait. Um…”
I rubbed at my eye and grumbled out, “My front pocket. In my pants.”
Thad disappeared for a moment but bounced back on the bed triumphantly with a foil packet in his hand. “You came prepared!”
“Yeah, Imma regular boy scout,” I sassed as I watched Thad rip the packet open and put the condom on.
He shuffled forward on his knees. “Shall we…like this?” he asked, holding his dick at the ready.
I nodded and flopped back on the bed. I can do this. I lay there lax as Thad’s cock pushed in to me. It’s the only way. His groaning faded into the background as he eased in and out in short movements. I kept concentrating on the drag as he pulled out. It’s nice.
He grabbed my ankles and pulled my legs up to rest against his shoulders as he started to pump into me with faster, deeper strokes. The loud whine that followed made me frown. Where had that come from? Then Thad leaned forward, letting my legs slip off him and started kissing my chest.
“See, I knew you’d like it,” he panted as he thrust in harder. The whine rattled in my ears again and I realized it was coming from me. Thad slid down to wrap his arms around me, mouthing at my neck, as his hips rolled against me.
This feels amazing. I bucked up against him, starting to work my body with his, letting him drive in deep while he mumbled my name over and over. I kept my eyes shut, trying to block his voice out, as I thought about Kurt doing this with me, hearing Kurt say my name and hold me close like this.
“Fuck, don’t stop,” I groaned. “Don’t stop.”
The deep chuckle in my ear made my skin prickle but the slam of his body into mine sent a wave of pleasure through me. “Please,” I started to beg with my eyes screwed shut, holding on tight. More. Need to come, Kurt. Lemme come.
The words he grunted out were lost on me. I could only concentrate on the sensation of the cock driving in and out, the drag of my dick over his stomach as we moved together. I clung onto him tightly as my orgasm gained pace, finally bursting through as our mouths crashed against each other. I could feel his teeth pull at my bottom lip as my body spasmed against his.
I turned my head away as he roared his satisfaction and spilled into the condom. He panted against my neck as we lay still, breathless and sated for several wordless minutes.
“You can sleep here tonight, if you want.”
Remembering who I was with had me wriggling against him uncomfortably. I pushed Thad off me and rolled to the edge of the bed, my head still fuzzy, as he fumbled with the condom.
“You okay?” Thad asked as he trailed a finger down my spine.
“Yeah. I-” I ran a hand through my hair, trying to get it to sit back down properly. I was lost for words. That was the first time I was with someone while we were both awake. And I liked it. With Thad. I shook my head to clear my foggy mind. I couldn’t like it. Not with him. This isn’t the way it was supposed to be.
“You don’t want to stay?”
I shook my head in reply and he made a confused noise behind me. “What,” I asked tiredly, hearing him shuffle around on the bed.
“I…I thought you had a good time.”
My gaze found the floor, the color of the carpet blurring in front of my eyes. “Look, Thad…I-That was- …Yeah, I did,” I said with a nod. “But I-” I shook my head again and yawned, rolling my shoulders and stretching my arms until my hands curled in against the back of my head.
“C’mon, Blaine. Lie down. You need to sleep.”
“But I don’ wanna…” I gave up speaking as Thad’s hand pulled at my shoulder and my body gave way, falling back. He pulled me close and wrapped an arm around me.
“You don’t want what?”
“I should go.”
“You should close your eyes now. I won’t try anything, I swear.” I made a squeaky grunt of disbelief which made Thad smile as he nuzzled my jaw. “I’m sleepy too, y’know. ‘Cos I did all the work.”
I snorted as Thad’s thumb stroked over a rib and lulled me into closing my eyes. He hooked his leg over my thigh and sighed contentedly.
I shouldn’t sleep here.
***
It was cold when I woke up. I couldn’t tell how long I’d be conked out but Thad was in the same position as earlier, tucked into my side.
I eased myself out from under his arm and managed to get dressed without too much noise. The trip back to my room was swift and silent with my shoes tucked under my arm. I tried to keep my mind just as quiet, not willing to think about all that had happened tonight until I was in the safety of my room.
Pulling up at my door, I fished for the key in my pocket but paused when I couldn’t find it. A twist of the handle confirmed my earlier sloppy actions. I’d left the door unlocked. Stupid.
I dropped my shoes by the closet and stripped off for another shower. The smell of whiskey and sex making me feel sick.
Under the hot spray of the shower, my mind finally kicked into gear. I’d liked it. Oh, who am I kidding? I loved it. I just wish it had been with someone other than Thad. You mean you wish it had been with Kurt.
My mouth turned down as I thought of him. I’ll never have that with Kurt. Why on earth would he want someone like me?
I ducked my head and let the water beat against the base of my skull as I lost control and let my tears fall. All I’ll ever do is hurt him. The curl of my open mouth as I cried caught the falling water flowing down my face. He deserves so much more than that. I pushed my face into the crook of my elbow to save myself from choking as I bawled helplessly. Than me.
Shuffling to my bed, I lay there in the dark thinking in circles.
Did I do the right thing for the wrong reasons or the wrong thing for the right reasons?
***
Part Twenty Four>>