RP LOG with 1twntyovreighty, cutandlearn & deleomom | Waiting

Sep 07, 2010 15:05

[Follows THIS]

Dave had made the tough decision the evening prior to have the Propofol dosage stopped to give Chris a chance to wake up naturally. It hadn't been an easy one. Carla knew this. She had been there, not too far away, when she had seen Dave in serious talks with his boss and also with Rick's doctor. They then all seemed to take a united front in a decision with the other doctors. Dave looked ill, like the weight of the decision was as heavy as if he had the weight of the world on his shoulders. She could just see in his eyes that deciding on Chris' medical matters was probably one of the hardest things he was facing. When she had asked him how he was after it, and after the dosage had been stopped, he admitted to her had been vomiting all afternoon just trying to get his head around it. But it came to a point where he didn't want Chris to be kept in a coma any longer than he needed to. If he had strength to be awake to heal, it was better than messing with his brain to keep him in a chemical sleep.


But Chris had just continued to remain unconscious. He stayed like that all night, with no hint of waking. Apparently there were clinical indicators that showed he wasn't in a coma anymore, but he also wasn't conscious, and the more the minutes ticked by, the more and more Carla got worried and anxious. Now, the following morning, she found herself sitting in the ICU room with Rick and Serena. None of them wanted to be too far away in case Chris woke and the ICU staff had bent the rules to let three of them in there when it was only supposed to be two. Everyone else in vigil were waiting in waiting rooms or in the hall. But the young, unconscious trauma surgeon just kept making them wait. It felt like forever that Carla had been sitting staring at her son's face, watching for any signs he was going to regain consciousness, but nothing. He was still ventilated, but Dave gave Serena consent to remove the tube if he woke and started choking on it. She would know what to do in that sense, and Carla was relieved the girl had something to think about... something to do if it came to it. So far, she had been roadblocked in doing anything but hold his hand. Carla was standing over near the window now, views of the beach far, far in the distance. She put her hand over her mouth and let out a shaking breath, fighting the urge to start pacing. They had just hit sixteen hours since the medication was stopped, and Chris just still slept on. It had to be lingering between a good thing and a bad thing, now. What happened if just didn't wake up?

She looked over at her eldest son, sitting beside Serena. They were both sitting stiffly and awkwardly, Rick now with a bandana covering most of his hair. It suited him, and with his unshaven stubble, it made him look rough around the edges like he really was deep down. He and Chris looked more like brothers now than they ever did. No matter how ill they looked right now, they were still her beautiful boys. All she wanted was for them to be healthy again... and smiling.

Rick couldn't bring himself to look at Serena let alone break the awkward silence that seemed to have descended on them. He could talk to his mother, and his unconscious brother more easily that his brother's girlfriend. He and Serena had been developing a pretty good friendship but now this had happened and he was sure she was angry with him. She seemed to ball her hands into fists whenever she was around him. Even if she seemed to have been relieved to hear the kidney was working. After another long moment of silence Rick reached out to cover her hand with his and ignored the way she flinched in surprise at the gesture. She didn't pull away though, and that was a start. Rick turned to look at his mom and gave her a small smile. The bandana was still something he was getting used to but at least it did suit him. It was strange to look at himself in the mirror these days. Sometimes Rick didn't even recognise himself.

A shave just seemed too much trouble and he wondered if he was going to lose his facial hair and pubic hair as well. He hadn't even asked about that. It seemed strange that a cancer patient would have a beard and no hair on their head. He closed his eyes briefly when he needed to swallow back a lump at the thoughts and forced himself to look at Serena and found her blue eyes on him. "He'll wake up..." he whispered.

Serena just gave a nod and went back to looking at Chris. It was something she'd been telling herself over and over again but sixteen hours with no sign of waking up had her worrying. It even had her doctor brain kicking into overdrive as she tried to work out why he might not be waking up. What could be keeping him from opening his eyes. Whether or not he was in a lot of pain, but he hadn't moved. He didn't seem to even flinch if she squeezed his hand. She also just kept running over and over in her head what she'd do if he needed the tube removed. She needed something to think about other than the fact that the hours just seemed to keep dragging. There was a groan that broke through the sound of the heart-rate monitor and Serena wasn't sure she'd heard it at first. Then she saw one of Chris' facial muscles twitch and she leaned forward as she squeezed his hand and Rick's. "Chris? Baby..."

Chris didn't know what he felt first, all he knew was that what he was feeling was wrong. One, he couldn't move. It felt like he was trapped. When he tried, everything hurt. Everything hurt like it probably would if he was taking a swim in an acid bath. As if that wasn't bad enough, when he tried to suck in a breath of pain, everything in his throat constricted and he started to choke and panic. But without being able to move much, he couldn't do anything about it and the hint of a groan tried to become a terrified cry, but came out more like just whimper. His mind was aware that something was very, very wrong, but of very little else. Outwardly, to everyone witnessing it, they could see him trying to move and not succeeding so much. The only real sign he was coming to was when the machines started screeching and he was choking on the tube down his throat.

Carla had been on edge as soon as Serena seemed to notice something she missed. She stood there, frozen, watching worriedly. But then he was choking. Anyone could see he was choking, and the machines were going off. Tears filled her eyes again and spilled over. "Take it out! Take it out!" she cried in her own panic, even if she was keeping her distance, too scared to get close. She was just a science teacher. The only one with medical experience in their family was the one in desperate need of it.

Rick let go of Serena's hand the moment Chris started to choke. His fingers gripped the armrests of his wheelchair and he clenched his jaw tight to stop himself from yelling out like his mom. Serena would know what to do, she was a doctor and Rick watched as the young woman pulled herself together and was immediately on her feet and leaning over Chris. Rick was a pilot, not a doctor. He just got to wear a blue jumpsuit and fly the doctors around. He had never been trained. He wasn't sure he could ever actually do what his brother did. What Serena did. He was in awe of Chris - the Genius Cowboy. Dr C. He knew it was a lot more than sitting in an office writing scripts like their father had always believed. He also knew how fucking terrifying it could be waking up with a tube in your throat and no way to tell anyone that someone was wrong.

"It's okay, Chris. It's okay. I'm right here with you, baby. You're safe. Rick's here, your Mom's here... It's okay. You've got a tube down your throat, and I'm going to remove it. You needed it to help you breathe, so just calm down. You don't need to panic. I'll get it out. Just listen to me, Chris. Listen to my voice." Serena had no idea where she'd suddenly managed to pull the sound of authority from as it laced her tone. She just knew that right now it was Dr Warren that was needed. She gripped tube and kept talking to Chris as she worked on getting it out and trying to keep him from choking.

That was Serena. It was definitely Serena. Even if she hadn't said it, he would have known it as soon as she started talking. It wasn't easy for him to stay calm, though. Something was stuck in his throat, and a few scared tears escaped and slipped down the sides of his face. His gag reflex was kicking in though, but he did manage to focus on her voice. His brain was too foggy to really comprehend what she was saying to him, but Serena was here, and she was calm. He could be calm too. With another choking cough, he felt the thing pull out of his throat and he reflexively sucked in a sharp, hoarse breath, filling his lungs with a burst of air without any mechanical aids. Only, the abrupt movement in his torso shot a bolt of red, hot pain through him and a choked up cry of pain escaped him, even more tears coming in response. "Stop... make... it stop," he begged through another choked cough.

Carla shook her head sightly, having no clue what the hell to do. "Stop? What does he want stopped?" she got out through a small gasp of shock over the fact words were coming out of his mouth.

Rick reached back for his mom's hand and held it tightly. "Is he in pain?"

Serena looked down at Chris then glanced at the monitor to get an idea of his vitals. "It's okay, baby, it's okay. I'll make it stop. You just need to move carefully, okay? Don't forget you went through surgery..." She stopped herself before she mentioned anything about the extensive surgery he'd gone through on top of transplant surgery. Chris wasn't going to be ready to absorb any of that yet. It would be enough for him to just be awake and trying to orient himself. She left his side to go over to a trolley that she was really hoping had some meds in it. She had second thoughts though and came back to Chris' bed to push the buzzer for the nurse. Serena wasn't his doctor. She just took Chris' hand again and leaned down to kiss his forehead. "Someone will be here soon, baby. They'll get you something. I promise."

A couple of Chris' doctors, followed by some nurses in tow arrived and were hovering over him like something out of a TV show. Carla just watched helplessly. Chris hardly seemed to know his own name, let alone string clear answers together for them. They seemed to give him more injections and although the tube was gone from down his throat, he was put on oxygen through tubes in his nose while the nurses stood there and documented everything the doctors were saying. Then they seemed to just up and leave after telling Serena they would be back in fifteen minutes for monitoring. Carla wanted to run after them and smack them, but she didn't even know why. "That's all?" she was asking but then she saw Chris weakly reach to try and take Serena's hand as she stood beside him, but he only succeeded in hooking his fingers in hers.

A hangover was maybe slightly close to how Chris was feeling right then. A hangover after a night on five different kinds of Tequila, Vodka, and maybe eight six packs to chase it. He came to the conclusion he was in hospital, but the recollection of any operation had eluded him at first. He couldn't remember clear enough of anything. He could hardly remember his full name when they asked. But he could hear the slow beeps and he used those to focus on and try to pull his mind in a little. Serena was there. She had to have been there, he wasn't just dreaming that. No way. She would be there if something was wrong. That was her hand... he could see the bracelet. Tiffany. Something he had been so proud of himself for doing, even if it took him damn ages to pick what he wanted, knowing it had to be perfect. He was trying to take her hand, but his arms felt so weak and tired, like they had no muscles or bones in them. He only just managed to make a connection when flashes of information started to filter back into his brain. "Serena... Rick..." he asked. "Rick."

Serena took her seat again as she took Chris' hand in both of hers and kissed his fingers as the calmness started to give way to just sheer relief at seeing him awake, and hearing him talk. Tears pricked the backs of her eyes but she blinked them back as she just looked over Chris' face. She understood the flurry of activity. She'd been one of the doctors to just come in and do all these tests and then just leave again. Personally she was grateful to be getting fifteen minutes of peace without them. She smiled at her boyfriend and let out a shuddering breath. "He's here. He's right here next to me. So's your mom."

Rick leaned across to rest his hand next to Chris' side. "You look like shit, bro. Seriously. There is no way you're prettier than me. I definitely got all the looks," he teased even if he was getting choked up again. "I'm okay, buddy. Just glad you're awake."

Chris managed to focus on Rick after glancing around to try and figure out where everyone was. He didn't miss the mention of their mom, but that had to be a mistake. Rick hadn't told her anything, and Chris chickened out when he was in Wimico because he didn't want to see her cry again. He could feel Serena's hand around his... still feel it. This wasn't the first time she had held his hand like this. "Y'still here..." he mumbled to Serena. But as soon as he could see Rick sitting there, awake and alive, talking to him, joking, Chris just burst into tears of relief before there was any way he could stop it.

Carla was stood back a little, just watching. His eyes were open and he was talking. He was asking for his brother. That's all she cared about. As soon as she tears came, though, she put her hand on her chest and couldn't stop her own coming. Sheer relief just flooded through her, and it was something else tugging deep inside her. It was the fact her boys actually seemed to have a bond, for their first time in their lives, they were connected. It was something she never, ever thought she would live to see.

Serena's bottom lip trembled as she threatened to go out in sympathy but she managed to keep from crying as she sat forward to kiss Chris' forehead again and brush her fingers through his hair. "I told you I wouldn't go anywhere, baby. I'm always gonna be right here." She kissed his hand before she stood up and waved at Carla to try and get her to take her seat so she could be with her sons. Serena stayed standing next to Chris' bed with her fingers in his hair as she watched the Deleos. Even Rick was crying a little.

It was true, Rick had tears rolling down his cheeks but he was trying his best to ignore them. He flipped his brother off weakly as he snorted in amusement. "Only you could make me cry so goddamn much. Maybe you gave me the feminine kidney..." Rick slipped his arm around his mom's shoulders and gave her a squeeze now that she was sitting next to him. "Some reunion, huh?"

Serena was there, and so was Rick. He was alive. He didn't die. He was actually still there. Chris was processing all of that slowly. His brain just felt really groggy and exhausted. But when Rick put his arms around their mom, Chris finally managed to see that she really was there. It wasn't a mistake. The three most important people in his whole world were there... Dave was the exception, but Chris would figure that one out soon. He managed a slight laugh and a hint of a smirk. "... well, fuck... y'gonna tell... me I nearly... died or... somethin'..." But he scrunched his face up again when more pain made itself known, trying to brace himself through it without screaming the place down. The whole middle portion of his body was in agony.

With Chris' hand occupied by Serena's, Carla grabbed hold of Rick's instead and squeezed it with an almost painful grip as she watched her little boy suffer. He seemed to be okay, though. As okay as he could be. There was just the tiniest bit of that trademark smirk, too, which could say more than any words could. He just could have picked better words than those. She suddenly seemed at a total loss for words. She wanted to kiss them all, and then go track down Dave to kiss him, and then kiss his girlfriend too before she went up to the roof and screamed to all of Miami that her baby was okay. She just didn't want to be a dorky mom, though.

Serena used her other hand to give Carla's shoulder a squeeze, and gave her a smile before she watched Chris again, trying hard not to want to let the doctor inside her take over and start fussing. His doctors had it all in hand. Of course they did. He couldn't be getting better care. She bit down on her lip at Chris' words and all too quickly the image of him lying there flatlining entered her mind and she choked on a sob as she covered her mouth with her hand.

Rick looked up at Serena and then back at Chris as his mouth formed a thin line. Serena was never going to be able to tell Chris what happened. He wasn't sure if his mother would either. Rick had chickened out on telling Chris the truth before, but now he wasn't going to. "Listen, bro... The truth is you almost did. There was a lot of bleeding. Your heart stopped. They had to get you going again, fix you up. You've been in a coma."

Chris swallowed a little, but his throat was hurting and he was starting to feel oddly nauseated, like he wanted to be sick, but wasn't sure he actually had the energy to. He couldn't even manage to get his eyes open beyond a lethargic, heavy-lidded attempt. But he heard Rick's words well enough and another moment of panic spiked in him, especially when Serena started crying. He started to peel at the front of his gown, trying to get it away from him to he could get to the op site and see it with his own eyes. All he was doing was getting everything tangled up though and above him, the heart monitor's beeps started to increase in pace. He just needed to know that all they fucking took was a kidney.

"Hey, hey, hey!" Carla jumped in this time, shooting forward in the seat and grabbing for her son's overactive hands. "You stop right there, mister. Don't you dare go peeling anything off! Christopher James Deleo, you stop that right now!" The Mom Voice. Worked every time. Chris stilled, and despite the panicked tears dripping down his face again, he stopped the frantic clawing at his gown and looked up at her. She gave him a moment to process it before she started fixing his gown back into place. "I know you're a surgeon, sweetheart, but not this time."

Serena had to take a moment to get herself together again as she watched Mrs Deleo put on the Mom Voice and straighten up his gown. Her hand was still covering her mouth and she dropped it back down before she started to play with the bracelet around her wrist and looked down at Chris' ring still attached to her finger with medical tape. She couldn't give it back to him just yet, and she was hardly about to take it off. She watched Chris and his mom before she rest her hand on his shoulder to let Chris know she was still there. It was something to see the Deleos back together.

"It's okay, bro. You're all fixed up. Everyone's saying that you're gonna be okay. Apparently they just gotta know if you can pee on your own." Rick was hardly about to ask his brother if his dick felt up to the task. Chris still had a catheter in whereas Rick was finally free of his and he couldn't be happier. "The docs know what they're doing, and Dave's been making decisions just like you wanted. Even Proctor's been checking in on you."

Chris didn't know what was wrong with him. He just had this claustrophobic panic setting it. It probably was because he was so used to being on the other side of the fence. This was a lot for him to take in. The fact that his mom was even here was a lot to process, let alone the fact he was on the receiving end of the Mom Voice. That always got him. Mom Voice and mom crying did it every single time. "I-I don't get it," he said, choking up in confusion. There had been small pieces of information, but nothing made sense. Why would he just bleed on the table? "I don't feel so good."

Carla glanced over at Serena, figuring she would know what to do, or at least her presence would be able to calm him down. "There was an accident in the surgery. A... a perforation of the, um..." She tried to remember all that Dave had explained to her, but with very little sleep, it was just eluding her. And the way Chris was looking right now, it was hard to forget he was a doctor himself and would probably operate better with some medical facts to understand better and not feel so in the dark. "A-Abdominal Aorta? Is that it?"

Serena gave a nod. "Yes, that's it. She shifted to be a little more into Chris vision again and took his hand as she rubbed her thumb over the back of it. Thankfully the IV was inserted into his other hand. "One of the doctors nicked the valve when they were removing the kidney. It didn't start to bleed until they were about to stitch you back up. Your--you went into cardiac arrest and... and they had to drag me out of there. They did manage to get all the damage fixed, and the paddles got your heart going again. They're monitoring you closely to make sure there's no, ah... lasting damage. But you should be okay. You might just take a little while longer to recuperate. Dave had the Probofol stopped so that you had a chance to wake up on your own. You definitely had us waiting around... Took your sweet time, but I know you like to sleep in."

Rick rubbed his hand against his mom's back as he sat back in his chair a bit. It was hard to watch his brother try and take this all in, but he wasn't running. He was going to stick it out just like he promised. He thought again about the fact he needed to tell his mom that he had a baby on the way, but this really wasn't the time. "Gave us all a hell of a scare, bro."

A nurse appear again, pulling her obs trolley with her up to the bedside. She smiled politely, but didn't intrude on the family time. She did still have to keep a close eye on Chris, though. "He says he doesn't feel good. Can you get him something for that?" Carla asked her quietly. Chris didn't look well. He might be awake, but it was easy to be lulled into a false sense of security that that meant everything was 100% fine again. It wasn't. Chris was still seriously sick, and compared to how he usually looked, his appearance was terrible. The nurse promised to get the doctor to order something for it and Carla nodded gratefully.

Chris listened, using the energy he managed to have from somewhere to listen and process Serena's words. It wasn't lost on him how crappy they looked too. This wasn't just a minor complication. An injury to the AA by a scalpel was a fucking serious complication, and he was lucky to be alive. He was lucky his heart even had enough blood to get through the cardiac arrest. With stark realisation, he could see that his fears prior to the surgery hadn't been unfounded. He started to get emotional again and his face crumbled, causing him to put a hand up to cover it with a soft, "Oh god..." That was all before he stopped to remember he only had one kidney left, too. His other one was in Rick.

Serena leaned forward to give Chris the best hug she could given their positions and the fact the nurse was trying to do her job. She nuzzled in against his neck and just stayed there for a long while. He might have hospital smell all over him, but it wasn't like Serena was foreign to it. He was still Chris under it all. He had a long way to go before he was one hundred percent better but he was awake. And Serena was going to hang onto that.

Rick watched the scene before he patted Chris' leg and gave it a comforting squeeze. He had no idea what to do when everyone was crying. His own tears had stopped, but that didn't mean it hurt any less to watch his family in pain.

Carla bit down on her lip and cleared her throat softly. It was so hard for her to see a girl being so affectionate to Chris in a relationship Carla had known nothing about. Chris' eyes had fallen closed with Serena's closeness, like he was trying to draw on it for some strength. She gave Rick's hand a soft squeeze again. "Why don't we go and get you some water, sweetheart? Dr Watson specifically told me that you need to keep drinking... and so did just about every other person in a lab coat I have been in the presence of lately. We'll come back," she told her eldest son. She just knew that right now, Chris could probably use a little bit of time alone with Serena. In fact, maybe time alone with each of them would be the best tactic... after he got some more rest and his strength back a little.

Word Count | 4,679

[co-written] deleomom, [rp] 1twntyovreighty, [rp] cutandlearn, [with] cutandlearn, [ship] chris/serena, [with] deleomom, [co-written] 1twntyovreighty, [co-written] cutandlearn, [with] 1twntyovreighty, [rp] deleomom

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