Fic: Not in Kansas Anymore (1/23)
Title: Not in Kansas Anymore (1/23)
Fandom: Stargate/Star Wars
Rating: M
Genres: crossover, romance
Summary: When Laura Cadman and Evan Lorne woke up in a storage room, they never thought it would be in a galaxy far, far away. And now they need to find a way back home, past Special Operations agents and stormtroopers, between the fronts in a war they thought they knew (from television, mind you). But no one ever said it would be easy.
A/N: Ohmigod Big Bang fic! Inbetween at least two computers dying on me, work, a trip to San Francisco and about a million other times I got this fic for het_bigbang finished! Thanks to everyone who cheered me on, gave constructive criticism and gave me a kick in the ass when I needed it. Special thanks to mackenziesmomma, my beta who betaed this in record speed and ancient_leah and pingulotta who were first readers and cheerleaders and yappichick who did the amazing artwork for this story of which I included the cover in this post. Thank you, everyone!
Not in Kansas Anymore
“Baby this town rips the bones from your back
It's a death trap, it's a suicide rap
We gotta get out while we're young
'Cause tramps like us, baby we were born to run.”
Bruce Springsteen, “Born to Run”
Dramatis Personae:
Lanteans:
1st Lieutenant Laura Cadman, human female from Earth
Major Evan Lorne, human male from Earth
Krayt Team:
Boss, Shistavanen female from Uvena III, team leader
Corpsman Tambeca, Wookiee female from Kashyyk, Krayt Team's medic
Sergeant 1st Class Riel, Rodian male from Rodia, Krayt Team's communications specialist
Specialist Anaron Tarles, human male from Commenor, Krayt Team's weapons specialist
1st Lieutenant Celran Darkkin, human male from Alderaan, construction engineer on loan from Rebel Corps of Engineers
Other Alliance Personnel:
1st Lieutenant Wilna Tarrere, human female from Dantooine, Krayt Team's controller
Major Konah Y'lic, Bothan male from Bothawui, Krayt Team's Mission Group leader
Captain Idakan Dargon, Devaronian from Ralltiir, pilot of lambda-class shuttle Dargon's Folly, Krayt Team's preferred extraction craft
Lt Commander Virina Moren, human female from Correllia, Dargon's co-pilot
Imperial Personnel:
Major Wilrun Davikoff, human male from Coruscant, Dimas base commander
Captain Antonin Warrayan, human male from Kuat, Dimas base executive officer
Captain Delvin Sandwalker, human male from Tatooine, Dimas base stormtrooper contingent commander/Chief of Security
One
Okay, he thinks, this really is the day he will quit the Stargate program. Or would be, if he were in any position to do so… namely actually be in Atlantis or in the SGC. As it is, though, he’s not there. He’s not even in his own universe. Or maybe he is but the thing that emitted the strange beam that he tried to push Cadman away from caused him to fall into some coma and he’s just dreaming all of this.
Because, right now, he’s sitting in a storage room full of all kinds of devices and doodads and gizmos he has never seen before with an unconscious Lieutenant Cadman lying beside him. So far he didn’t want to risk a peek out of the only door leading out of the room but he had thrown a look around, trying to figure out where they might have landed. At first he hadn't had much success because there had been no discernable logos or any other kind of recognizable features on any of the crates and devices… but then he had found a crate bearing a logo he’d seen before.
And that had been the moment he’d started to doubt that this was actually happening. Because after a few minutes of frantically trying to remember which planet in the two galaxies he knew he knew the stylized wheel with spikes from, he’d remembered. He had seen it before… but it hadn’t been on any of the planets he’d been on. Instead he’d seen it in movies and in the comics one of his cousins practically devoured and from one or two video games friends of his - and at some time in his life even he - had been playing.
It was, to his utter disbelief, the symbol the evil galactic Empire used as their emblem. The one that, according to George Lucas and herds of franchise authors, artists and whoever else made money with it, was ruled by the Emperor and his ever faithful sidekick, Darth Vader. The whole thing had caused him to groan and slump down beside the still unconscious form of Cadman and fighting an upcoming headache that promised to be spectacular.
So at first he doesn’t realize that there’s some movement beside him but then a groan fills the silence of the storage room and he turns towards Cadman. Groaning again, she slowly gets up into a sitting position. After another moment, she apparently realized she’s not alone. She blinks and then makes a face. “Just another day in space, huh?”
He rubs his neck. “Well… not… quite.”
That catches her attention… faster than he would have liked to. “What exactly is that supposed to mean, sir?”
Okay… there’s no way in hell he can tell her about his observation without her thinking him completely nuts… and without having to admit that there had been a time when Evan Lorne, probably the most mature person in Atlantis, at least according to common gossip, had been somewhat of a nerd. “Uh… let’s look at it this way…” As he gets up to lift one of the blankets on the crates surrounding them, he can see her following him with her eyes… and the stupid headache increases even more. Just great. “Do you have any idea what this symbol might mean?”
For a moment, incomprehension is written all over her face. Then a disbelieving look on her face and, “You’ve gotta be kidding me. Uh… sir.” What the…? “We did not land ourselves in a Star Wars movie. Please tell me we didn’t.”
He pauses. “Wait… are you telling me you actually recognize it?”
She snorts and then rolls her eyes. “Just because I’m a girl doesn’t mean I can’t be a geek at times as well, sir. I also grew up with four brothers. Of course I’m able to recognize an Imperial emblem when I see one.”
Stunned at the sudden revelation - for some reason he would have never placed Laura Cadman among the hard core Star Wars fans - he can only blink… and has to resist the temptation to rub his temples because that fucking headache just won’t go away, dammit. “Right. Okay. So… any suggestions, Lieutenant?”
She sighs. “No, not yet… but I think I’m starting to get a baaad feeling about this.” He turns back to her, dismayed to see her barely holding back a grin.
“Not. Helping. Also… not funny, Lieutenant.” Did he just catch her rolling her eyes? Nah, she wouldn’t do that. She’s as afraid of him as all the other… ah, who is he trying to kid? Of course she isn't afraid of him and of course she rolled her eyes.
Another sigh. Then she’s standing beside him, with her arms crossed and a little grin on her face… apologetic? “Sorry, sir. Just couldn’t help it. It’s just not…”
“A Star Wars movie without someone having a bad feeling, I know.” He really tries to stay serious but in the end can’t help sharing a little amused grin with her. Then he realizes he never actually made sure she was okay. After all, she was out longer than he. “Anyway… you okay, Lieutenant?”
At first she raises her eyebrows as if to say ‘You’re asking that now?’ but says after a short once over of herself, “Yeah, I think so. You?”
Well, apart from that fucking headache that seems to get stronger or weaker completely at will which is starting to make him insane… “Yeah, guess so. Now that we cleared that up…” he wants to ask her for ideas again but realizes that would probably make him look pretty foolish because it’s not his standard performance. But it’s really hard to think straight with the headache and the confusion of not really having been able to wrap his head around the fact that they landed themselves inside a science-fiction movie are his opponents.
Unfortunately, she seems to have picked up on it anyway but to his relief, she doesn’t comment on it… well, yet. Instead, she throws a critical look around and then walks straight up to the box directly behind him. “Lieutenant?”
Instead of answering, though, she… oh, now he sees it as well. Right on top of that box is a cylindrical object, about the size of his hand. Around it, pieces of wood are scattered. Apparently, it had been in a box, just like the rest… until recently. “Lieutenant… is that what I think it is?”
She hesitates for a moment to grab it and he realizes it’s the first time he sees her doing something like that. Usually… Laura Cadman doesn’t hesitate, she just does. Or maybe… he was just never close enough to her to see that very, very small moment of insecurity before. But then she does and eyes the thing a little critically before saying, “If you think that this is the little partner to the Ancient… thingy that got us here… yeah, I’d say so. I mean… look at this.” She gestures towards where the thing stood before.
Taking up a random piece of wood and giving it a short look, he nods. “Yeah. Looks like the aftermath of a small explosion. I gather that’s what happened when we got here.”
Cadman nods. “Yep, exactly. Which makes me wonder… shouldn’t we be surrounded by stormtroopers or something? I really can’t imagine our coming here was a quiet affair.”
Oh damn, she’s right. “Actually… that’s a very good point, Lieutenant.” At that… she gives him a single raised eyebrow. What?
“Sir… are you sure you’re really okay? With all due respect but… you know, missing stuff like that and all… that’s kinda not your standard performance.” She looks a bit like she’s almost 100% sure she’ll get busted now but the thing is… she’s right. No matter what people say about him, he doesn’t bust his soldiers’ asses for saying the truth.
He can’t help sighing. “I’m fine… mostly, I mean.” She just raises that eyebrow again and he starts to find it slightly uncanny how easy it is for her to trip him with such a little gesture. “Alright… I’ve got a headache.” The eyebrow raises a little higher and there’s something like… concern? Yeah, that definitely looks like a ghost of concern on her face. “Something minor. Probably some kind of interdimensional jetlag or something. I’ll be fine.”
For a moment it looks like she’ll disagree but in the end, she just reaches into one of her vest’s pockets and hold out a small bottle of pills. “Need some aspirin, sir?”
His first impulse is to say that he doesn’t need painkillers for a bit of a headache but it chooses to intensify in that moment so he just takes the bottle, thanks her and takes two of the damned things, hoping they’ll get him rid of that headache. “Okay, Lieutenant, let’s find out if this can also get us back again.”
~*~
TBC in Chapter Two.
Fandom: Stargate/Star Wars
Rating: M
Genres: crossover, romance
Summary: When Laura Cadman and Evan Lorne woke up in a storage room, they never thought it would be in a galaxy far, far away. And now they need to find a way back home, past Special Operations agents and stormtroopers, between the fronts in a war they thought they knew (from television, mind you). But no one ever said it would be easy.
A/N: Ohmigod Big Bang fic! Inbetween at least two computers dying on me, work, a trip to San Francisco and about a million other times I got this fic for het_bigbang finished! Thanks to everyone who cheered me on, gave constructive criticism and gave me a kick in the ass when I needed it. Special thanks to mackenziesmomma, my beta who betaed this in record speed and ancient_leah and pingulotta who were first readers and cheerleaders and yappichick who did the amazing artwork for this story of which I included the cover in this post. Thank you, everyone!
Not in Kansas Anymore
“Baby this town rips the bones from your back
It's a death trap, it's a suicide rap
We gotta get out while we're young
'Cause tramps like us, baby we were born to run.”
Bruce Springsteen, “Born to Run”
Dramatis Personae:
Lanteans:
1st Lieutenant Laura Cadman, human female from Earth
Major Evan Lorne, human male from Earth
Krayt Team:
Boss, Shistavanen female from Uvena III, team leader
Corpsman Tambeca, Wookiee female from Kashyyk, Krayt Team's medic
Sergeant 1st Class Riel, Rodian male from Rodia, Krayt Team's communications specialist
Specialist Anaron Tarles, human male from Commenor, Krayt Team's weapons specialist
1st Lieutenant Celran Darkkin, human male from Alderaan, construction engineer on loan from Rebel Corps of Engineers
Other Alliance Personnel:
1st Lieutenant Wilna Tarrere, human female from Dantooine, Krayt Team's controller
Major Konah Y'lic, Bothan male from Bothawui, Krayt Team's Mission Group leader
Captain Idakan Dargon, Devaronian from Ralltiir, pilot of lambda-class shuttle Dargon's Folly, Krayt Team's preferred extraction craft
Lt Commander Virina Moren, human female from Correllia, Dargon's co-pilot
Imperial Personnel:
Major Wilrun Davikoff, human male from Coruscant, Dimas base commander
Captain Antonin Warrayan, human male from Kuat, Dimas base executive officer
Captain Delvin Sandwalker, human male from Tatooine, Dimas base stormtrooper contingent commander/Chief of Security
One
Okay, he thinks, this really is the day he will quit the Stargate program. Or would be, if he were in any position to do so… namely actually be in Atlantis or in the SGC. As it is, though, he’s not there. He’s not even in his own universe. Or maybe he is but the thing that emitted the strange beam that he tried to push Cadman away from caused him to fall into some coma and he’s just dreaming all of this.
Because, right now, he’s sitting in a storage room full of all kinds of devices and doodads and gizmos he has never seen before with an unconscious Lieutenant Cadman lying beside him. So far he didn’t want to risk a peek out of the only door leading out of the room but he had thrown a look around, trying to figure out where they might have landed. At first he hadn't had much success because there had been no discernable logos or any other kind of recognizable features on any of the crates and devices… but then he had found a crate bearing a logo he’d seen before.
And that had been the moment he’d started to doubt that this was actually happening. Because after a few minutes of frantically trying to remember which planet in the two galaxies he knew he knew the stylized wheel with spikes from, he’d remembered. He had seen it before… but it hadn’t been on any of the planets he’d been on. Instead he’d seen it in movies and in the comics one of his cousins practically devoured and from one or two video games friends of his - and at some time in his life even he - had been playing.
It was, to his utter disbelief, the symbol the evil galactic Empire used as their emblem. The one that, according to George Lucas and herds of franchise authors, artists and whoever else made money with it, was ruled by the Emperor and his ever faithful sidekick, Darth Vader. The whole thing had caused him to groan and slump down beside the still unconscious form of Cadman and fighting an upcoming headache that promised to be spectacular.
So at first he doesn’t realize that there’s some movement beside him but then a groan fills the silence of the storage room and he turns towards Cadman. Groaning again, she slowly gets up into a sitting position. After another moment, she apparently realized she’s not alone. She blinks and then makes a face. “Just another day in space, huh?”
He rubs his neck. “Well… not… quite.”
That catches her attention… faster than he would have liked to. “What exactly is that supposed to mean, sir?”
Okay… there’s no way in hell he can tell her about his observation without her thinking him completely nuts… and without having to admit that there had been a time when Evan Lorne, probably the most mature person in Atlantis, at least according to common gossip, had been somewhat of a nerd. “Uh… let’s look at it this way…” As he gets up to lift one of the blankets on the crates surrounding them, he can see her following him with her eyes… and the stupid headache increases even more. Just great. “Do you have any idea what this symbol might mean?”
For a moment, incomprehension is written all over her face. Then a disbelieving look on her face and, “You’ve gotta be kidding me. Uh… sir.” What the…? “We did not land ourselves in a Star Wars movie. Please tell me we didn’t.”
He pauses. “Wait… are you telling me you actually recognize it?”
She snorts and then rolls her eyes. “Just because I’m a girl doesn’t mean I can’t be a geek at times as well, sir. I also grew up with four brothers. Of course I’m able to recognize an Imperial emblem when I see one.”
Stunned at the sudden revelation - for some reason he would have never placed Laura Cadman among the hard core Star Wars fans - he can only blink… and has to resist the temptation to rub his temples because that fucking headache just won’t go away, dammit. “Right. Okay. So… any suggestions, Lieutenant?”
She sighs. “No, not yet… but I think I’m starting to get a baaad feeling about this.” He turns back to her, dismayed to see her barely holding back a grin.
“Not. Helping. Also… not funny, Lieutenant.” Did he just catch her rolling her eyes? Nah, she wouldn’t do that. She’s as afraid of him as all the other… ah, who is he trying to kid? Of course she isn't afraid of him and of course she rolled her eyes.
Another sigh. Then she’s standing beside him, with her arms crossed and a little grin on her face… apologetic? “Sorry, sir. Just couldn’t help it. It’s just not…”
“A Star Wars movie without someone having a bad feeling, I know.” He really tries to stay serious but in the end can’t help sharing a little amused grin with her. Then he realizes he never actually made sure she was okay. After all, she was out longer than he. “Anyway… you okay, Lieutenant?”
At first she raises her eyebrows as if to say ‘You’re asking that now?’ but says after a short once over of herself, “Yeah, I think so. You?”
Well, apart from that fucking headache that seems to get stronger or weaker completely at will which is starting to make him insane… “Yeah, guess so. Now that we cleared that up…” he wants to ask her for ideas again but realizes that would probably make him look pretty foolish because it’s not his standard performance. But it’s really hard to think straight with the headache and the confusion of not really having been able to wrap his head around the fact that they landed themselves inside a science-fiction movie are his opponents.
Unfortunately, she seems to have picked up on it anyway but to his relief, she doesn’t comment on it… well, yet. Instead, she throws a critical look around and then walks straight up to the box directly behind him. “Lieutenant?”
Instead of answering, though, she… oh, now he sees it as well. Right on top of that box is a cylindrical object, about the size of his hand. Around it, pieces of wood are scattered. Apparently, it had been in a box, just like the rest… until recently. “Lieutenant… is that what I think it is?”
She hesitates for a moment to grab it and he realizes it’s the first time he sees her doing something like that. Usually… Laura Cadman doesn’t hesitate, she just does. Or maybe… he was just never close enough to her to see that very, very small moment of insecurity before. But then she does and eyes the thing a little critically before saying, “If you think that this is the little partner to the Ancient… thingy that got us here… yeah, I’d say so. I mean… look at this.” She gestures towards where the thing stood before.
Taking up a random piece of wood and giving it a short look, he nods. “Yeah. Looks like the aftermath of a small explosion. I gather that’s what happened when we got here.”
Cadman nods. “Yep, exactly. Which makes me wonder… shouldn’t we be surrounded by stormtroopers or something? I really can’t imagine our coming here was a quiet affair.”
Oh damn, she’s right. “Actually… that’s a very good point, Lieutenant.” At that… she gives him a single raised eyebrow. What?
“Sir… are you sure you’re really okay? With all due respect but… you know, missing stuff like that and all… that’s kinda not your standard performance.” She looks a bit like she’s almost 100% sure she’ll get busted now but the thing is… she’s right. No matter what people say about him, he doesn’t bust his soldiers’ asses for saying the truth.
He can’t help sighing. “I’m fine… mostly, I mean.” She just raises that eyebrow again and he starts to find it slightly uncanny how easy it is for her to trip him with such a little gesture. “Alright… I’ve got a headache.” The eyebrow raises a little higher and there’s something like… concern? Yeah, that definitely looks like a ghost of concern on her face. “Something minor. Probably some kind of interdimensional jetlag or something. I’ll be fine.”
For a moment it looks like she’ll disagree but in the end, she just reaches into one of her vest’s pockets and hold out a small bottle of pills. “Need some aspirin, sir?”
His first impulse is to say that he doesn’t need painkillers for a bit of a headache but it chooses to intensify in that moment so he just takes the bottle, thanks her and takes two of the damned things, hoping they’ll get him rid of that headache. “Okay, Lieutenant, let’s find out if this can also get us back again.”
~*~
TBC in Chapter Two.