I hypnotize you humans with ugly colors!!! Bring me the gooshy!


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I want! Why can't U.S cats get some?!?!

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I've never been to a "grocery store." I make food magically appear in my bowl. Or I steal it from Red's plate.

The cold white stuff is taller than me! Red has finally got as smart as cats and stayed in bed all morning while it fell from the sky. I hate sharing my bed!!

The humans who worship cat food (horses are cat food!!) beat the humans who worship blonde cats with blue tongues. Blue tongues? On cats? Stupid humans!

Humans watching brown mousie games on TV...people who wear mouse food on their heads got beaten up by people with black cats on their hats. As if it could be any other way!

Take this, old lady who won't pet me!!

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This is just wrong!

There were old humans in my house! The woman wouldn't pet me. I rolled around looking all adorable and NOTHING! I had to chew on Red for fifteen minutes before I recovered from this insult!

It was horrible! I ran Outside when Red came home (like she always does at this time, allowing me to be in place to sneak Outside, ha ha ha!) and there was a DOG! Drooling, stinking, panting, sucking up to humans DOG! Eeeew!

Not funny!

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HEY!

It's not easy to shed the grey furs on black shirts and the black fur on white shirts! I'm AMAZING!