Slogans for Women's T-shirts

1. So many men, so few who can afford me.
2. God made us sisters; Prozac made us friends.
3. If they don't have chocolate in heaven, I ain't going.
4. At my age, I've seen it all, done it all, heard it all...I just
can't remember it all.
5. My Mother is a travel agent for guilt trips.
6. Princess, having had sufficient ( Read more... )

Come up to meet you, Tell you I’m sorry, You don’t know how lovely you are ( Read more... )

So I know I haven't actually written in this thing in forever, but I need some input on a situation that occured recently because it upset me and is stuck in my head ( Read more... )

He does not have a BEER GUT.

He has developed a LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY.

He is not a BAD DANCER.

He is OVERLY CAUCASIAN.

He does not GET LOST ALL ( Read more... )

One morning while making breakfast, a man walked up to his wife and pinched her on her butt and said, "You know if you firmed this up we could get rid of your girdle."

While this was on the edge of intolerable, she thought herself better and replied with silence.

The next morning the man woke his wife with a pinch on the breast and said, "You ( Read more... )

tell me about yourself!!  fill this out as a comment, and then you can post your own and make other people do it too ( Read more... )

... Blenders.
You need one, but you're not quite sure why.

... Chocolate Bars.
Sweet, smooth, and they usually head right for your hips.

... Coffee.
The best ones are rich, warm, and can keep you up all night long.

... Commercials.
You can't believe a word they say.

... Computers.
Hard to figure out and never have enough memory.

... Coolers ( Read more... )

In response to President Bush's Federal "No Child Left Behind Act"

(NCLB), it is proposed that students will have to pass a test to be
promoted to the next grade level.
In the hope that this proposal will be uniformly adopted by all of the
states as well as North Carolina, the new test will be called the
Federal Arithmetic and Reading Test, or ( Read more... )

Kiss on the hand - I adore you.

Kiss on the cheek - I just want to be friends.

Kiss on the chin - You are cute!

Kiss on the neck - I want you.

Kiss on the lips - I love you.

Kiss on the ears - Let's have some fun.

Kiss anywhere else - You're the best.

Butterfly Kiss - With your faces less than a breath away, open and close your eyelids ( Read more... )