its happening to me. the things i've done, are being done to me. i close my eyes and all i see is the monster i've turned into. i hate myself once again. only this time i can't blame the drugs because there are none. i hate myself for hurting those i love the most. why can't i just be content? why can't i accept the way my life is mapped out? why ( Read more... )

why doesn't the smoker ever have consideration to those of us who don't. i'm so sick of this crap. my eyes burn, my clothes smell and it is just inconsiderate. quit f'in smoking!

i keep forgetting that others will do to me what i do to them

I'm losing my identity. I even know who i am becoming.That would be okay if where I was heading was OK, but i'm becoming a nobody.I want to be somebody. A somebody to a lot of people. People who want me to be a somebody to them. Not to the ones who could care less if I was anything to them.What's wrong with me? What's wrong with them? Gotta get ( Read more... )

i'm going again. i have figured myself out and i'm okay.i look to the future and think about the past, and pray they are well. just needed to tell you this. i love all of you. the good not bad. i miss all of you. my heart wretches when i think about all the crap, but my heart desires what can be. and what might be again. <3

i choose to dance

my life is good. i would say great, but there are a few things holding me down. the first is i am insecure. i don't know how to explain it. i have always been insecure since ive been small. i didnt know where i belonged, i was different than everyone else in my family, different from, the neighbor kids, and everyone at school. i shut down and then ( Read more... )

it seems to manage to keep on going even though you want it to stand still. i want to move forwards, and i am in a safe way. but now, as life goes something or someone comes in and shakes things up. is it good or bad? feeling. i don't want to. i'm scared to open up, scared to move on, scared to feel things that have managed to hurt in the past. ( Read more... )

oh yea, home sweet home, but with all the nightmares.

you have gone leaving the rest of us missing you so.sarah has no one to fight over the coffee with. stevie needed to get new truckers sheet so he can try to sleep in his own bed. and me rudy with all this shit i've been through i don't know which way is up. i'm in the middle of the atlantic and everything reminds me of you. i miss you so. went into ( Read more... )