Shattered [1/1]
Title: Shattered [1/1]
Author: Flowerymisha
Pairing: KrisHo
Warning: BoyxBoy love. Enough said.
Summary: There was always a painful truth behind everything.
Author’s Note: Too much crying. Character death. Awful plot. Weak bottom. You’ve been warned T_T Can I write a story where Kyungsoo is protective over Junmyeon? YES I CAN AND PLEASE, NO TRANSLATIONS ALLOWED!
[Anomaly]
Junmyeon climbed up the barrier and looked down daringly.
He could see the pavement under and a tinge of fear crept into him. Junmyeon pressed his lips together, trying his best to prevent the tears that were coming. He was there by the rooftop all alone and his thought drifted to Jongdae. He pictured himself in the same position as his brother the night he died. What made it different was that there was no train approaching. Junmyeon thought of the chances of surviving if he jumped down...
Maybe, just maybe, that way he would be able to reunite with his brother.
The pretty male instinctively reached for his phone and speed dialing a number without even looking at the screen. For a split second, his fear subsided and all he wanted to do was to forget everything. He felt so lonely even with the presence of his friends. He felt tired waking up in the middle of the night because of the nightmares regarding his family.
But most of all, it was because he hated himself.
Junmyeon loathed himself so much that he just wanted to die. He could still feel those unwanted hands lingering on him and his thoughts ran to his boyfriend. The only person who was able to make him better. The only person who was able to make him felt loved and priceless. The only person he would allow to touch him.
He buried his face into his hands as he stifled a sob. Junmyeon felt so weak without him.
“Junmyeon-ah?”
The voice suddenly floated over the speaker.
It was enough to make Junmyeon gasped and took a step back from the barrier as he cried,
“Yifan.”
Six months had passed so quickly.
Without them realizing, it had been six months since Junmyeon came back from his hometown with a shattered heart. None of them counted the days. It was a wonder how those times were gone in a blink of an eye-it seemed just like yesterday when Junmyeon came back and burst out crying in front of Kyungsoo and the others.
But it had also been six months since Junmyeon had changed. He had begun to open himself up to his friends and his gloomy expressions started fading away. The hint of sadness was no longer there and people began to take notice of how truly beautiful Junmyeon was. The male smiled a lot and it was not just a typical smile. It was a sincere, kind hearted smile-the one that would make people stop doing whatever it was that they were doing to steal a glance at him.
But Junmyeon was at his best whenever he received a phone call from a certain someone. It was like all of his pain were taken away from him and Junmyeon was wrapped in endless bliss during these moments. Kyungsoo, being his roommate, was the first to notice this. Even though he and Junmyeon never took the time to sit and talk heart to heart again (after the heartbreaking confession about his hometown), it slipped once from the older male that he had a boyfriend and Kyungsoo was content to know that much.
Yifan.
The name slipped out a lot from Junmyeon’s lips between the phone calls. The person who would bring a smile to his face whenever he called. The person who would make him blush shyly because of something he said. The person that Junmyeon would say ‘I miss you’ to whenever they weren’t able to hold back their feelings anymore.
Junmyeon was in love with Kris and the feeling was mutual.
The male was starting to socialize that more and more people were beginning to notice him. He wasn’t exactly popular like Jongin or Chanyeol, but it was enough. At least Junmyeon was now brave enough to look at his classmates in the eye and send them a blinding smile.
A lot of people had started to confess.
It brought a shock to Junmyeon because he had never thought something like that would happen. Some of them were bold enough to show it while the others preferred the old fashioned way such as love letters or through a much modern way-emails. They were all turned down, of course. Junmyeon turned a beet red at the umpteenth sudden confessions addressed to him that week and apologized instantly. The male-a senior named Kangin-hung his head dejectedly at the rejection but was still brave enough to ask.
“Am I not good enough for you?”
“It’s not that,” Junmyeon shook his head in exasperation. Again, for the umpteenth time that week. “I-I’m seeing someone.”
“Oh,” Kangin’s face brightened a bit because at least the problem didn’t lie in him. A sour grin was etched onto his face as he spoke. “What a lucky guy. Well, I hope everything goes well for both of you...”
Junmyeon earnestly thanked the older male before walking away. He hoped there would be no sudden confessions anymore for the rest of the week (or even forever).The campus should have known by then that he was seeing someone and he didn’t have any intention to break up-or worse, cheating. Junmyeon dragged a hand down his face and sighed.
He missed his boyfriend so badly.
***
“I like you.”
This one probably could be categorized as one of the bold ones because he just came out of nowhere and decided to say the magic words.
Junmyeon and Kyungsoo were at the canteen, enjoying their meals in peace when someone came to their table unexpectedly. Both of them stopped eating and Kyungsoo caught Junmyeon grimacing slightly, as if to say ‘oh no, not again’. The latter shifted his gaze offhandedly from his lunch to Junmyeon and to the voice with a frown.
Confessing when there’s someone else around? How confident.
Kyungsoo spotted his seonbae, Kyuhyun, standing in front of them with a hopeful look on his face. His eyes weren’t directed to Kyungsoo, because Kyuhyun surely knew about his relationship with Jongin and no one would be stupid enough-even the seniors-to mess around with Jongin. So it could only mean that it was addressed to the other male by the table. Kyungsoo’s gaze was soon directed to his friend who sat across him.
Junmyeon’s fork never made it to his mouth. He slowly put the thing down to his plate and looked up in confusion.
The three of them were embraced with silence until Kyuhyun finally decided to repeat his words.
“I like you, Junmyeon-ah.”
It took Junmyeon quite a while to catch the said words and blinked. “O-oh.”
“If you’re not seeing anyone at the moment-“
“He is,” Kyungsoo said abruptly and the other two turned to look at him within a swift second. The doe eyed male clasped a hand over his mouth, realizing that it wasn’t his place to say so.
“Hi, Kyungsoo,” Kyuhyun greeted politely. “I didn’t see you there.”
“Hi, hyung,” Kyungsoo mumbled and busied himself with his unfinished lunch.
“But he’s right,” Junmyeon added hastily. “I’m seeing someone.”
Kyuhyun didn’t flinch and his smile grew even wider. “So I heard. But what can I say, I like you so much. And that doesn’t stop the possibility of us to be friends, right? Even with that ‘in a relationship’ status of yours.” Kyungsoo gaped slightly because he thought Kyuhyun was being rude. “And if you don’t mind me asking, is it someone in the university?”
Junmyeon went blank at all the questions. It was new to him. Usually everyone would just blatantly take his answer and walk away. Who would want to be friends after confessing and got rejected in return? Apparently, this Kyuhyun was different. “No, he’s...he’s someone from my hometown.”
“Ah.” Something glinted in Kyuhyun’s eyes. “Hometown... Well, you know, me and Kyungsoo are in the same club...maybe we could hang out sometimes.”
Junmyeon threw an uncomfortable gaze to Kyungsoo who just stared back at him lifelessly. “Oh...I...I guess?”
“Good,” Kyuhyun grinned. “So, I’ll see you around?”
When the pretty male didn’t say anything, Kyuhyun took it as a hint that he should go but he didn't take it as a rejection. The male apologized for disturbing their lunch and walked away rather happily.
Kyungsoo waited until Kyuhyun was out of their eyesight. “You should tell your boyfriend, hyung,” he said and pointed his fork toward Junmyeon’s direction. “I sense something from him. And not a good one, that is.”
Junmyeon sighed softly and shoved his plate aside. He had clearly lost his appetite and sank lower in his seat. Something about Kyuhyun scared him and he didn’t like it.
Kyungsoo stared at him and Junmyeon knew the younger male knew what he was thinking.
Junmyeon wanted to see Kris so badly.
***
Kyuhyun was persistent.
Kyungsoo’s hunch was right but Junmyeon didn’t know if it was good or bad. The older male started appearing and joining their group and it was the first time for someone as sweet as Kyungsoo showed his death glare. The first time it happened, Baekhyun was the only person who greeted Kyuhyun too cheerfully-apparently he was in the same club too with Kyuhyun and Kyungsoo.
Junmyeon could feel his and Kyungsoo’s smile faltering at the sight of Kyuhyun greeting the group and it completely vanished when the older male happily accepted Jongin’s fake courtesy to join them. Kyungsoo sagged in his seat, nudging Jongin not so subtly in protest. Baekhyun gave his friends a confused gaze and Chanyeol was the only one who seemed oblivious to the sudden change of atmosphere. Junmyeon, being Kyuhyun’s real target, could only offer a half watt smile.
Jongin never invited Kyuhyun to join anymore.
But Kyuhyun dropped by a lot, much to Kyungsoo’s dismay.
Everyone seemed to notice how moody Kyungsoo became whenever Kyuhyun joined them. Junmyeon knew it was his fault. If only he didn’t tell the taller male that they could be friends. But...wasn’t it just rude if he said no? And to think that he was their senior...
Unlike usual, Kyuhyun approached Junmyeon when he was alone that day.
The pretty male wanted to run at the sight of Kyuhyun walking to his locker, but he couldn’t because he had seen him and the latter had caught his eyes, too. Junmyeon was busted.
“Hey, Junmyeon-ah.”
Junmyeon forced himself to smile as he gazed up to the older male. “H-hyung.”
“I was wondering if you’re free...”
It was a good question because the answer was no, Junmyeon wasn’t free. He had a lot of homeworks to do and his friends were already waiting by the usual spot.
Junmyeon shook his head as polite as he could and closed his locker with a hand. “I’m so sorry, hyung. My friends are waiting for me-“
“Your friends? Cool. We can just join them.”
Junmyeon deadpanned. The thought of Kyuhyun joining them (again) and how grumpy Kyungsoo would become made him rethink his answer. Maybe, maybe if he gave in to Kyuhyun just this time, the male would just leave and never bother him again. Would it work, Junmyeon didn’t know, but it was worth a try. He sighed in defeat. “What do you want, hyung?”
“How about a movie?”
“I have homeworks...”, Junmyeon trailed off.
“Then a nice cup of coffee will do,” Kyuhyun grinned sheepishly and ran a hand through his hair. “Shall we?”
“But...”
“I promise you it won’t take long.”
It was transparent as crystal clear that Junmyeon was hesitant, but in the end he nodded as an answer.
He didn't want Kyungsoo to get into a bad mood was all.
***
'It won't take long' turned out to be a couple of long hours.
Junmyeon sighed because he knew he shouldn’t have trusted Kyuhyun. He should’ve just trusted his instinct to decline the invitation.
The male came back pretty late to the dorm that night. He paid extra care not to make a sound-he didn't want to wake his roommate up, Kyungsoo must have been asleep by then. But it turned out that he was wrong.
Kyungsoo’s voice sent his thoughts flying. “Where have you been, hyung?”
Junmyeon flinched in surprise as he saw the younger male put his hands on his hips, giving him a judging look. He chewed his inner cheek as he closed the door softly behind him. “I...I did my homeworks at a cafe nearby.”
It wasn’t entirely a lie. But Kyungsoo wouldn’t buy it so easily.
“All alone?”
Junmyeon tossed his sneakers nonchalantly to the shoerack and did his best to avoid Kyungsoo’s eyes. He thought of making up excuses but he decided he wouldn’t. He didn’t want to lie to his friend, especially not to Kyungsoo. “...no.”
Kyungsoo narrowed his eyes suspiciously. “Were you with Kyuhyun-hyung?” When Junmyeon didn’t answer, Kyungsoo groaned loudly. “Hyung, was that a date?”
“N-no.”
“How can you be so sure? What if Kyuhyun-hyung thinks so?”
“He-he knows I’m seeing someone-“
“He’s showing you that he doesn’t care, hyung! How can you be so blind at that??”
Junmyeon shut his eyes at Kyungsoo’s rising tone. He knew the younger male was upset and it was rare for him to be. Kyungsoo was usually so full of understanding and kind hearted and he wouldn’t judge anyone. But this time, it was different.
“Did you tell your boyfriend about this?”
Junmyeon still hesitated to look at Kyungsoo and feebly shook his head. “...no.”
Kyungsoo facepalmed and he exhaled loudly. “Hyung, listen to me. I know Kyuhyun-hyung. Me and Baekhyun are in the same singing club as him. And believe me, you don’t want him around. He’s good looking and all, but his attitude...” Kyungsoo stepped closer to Junmyeon and gave him an earnest look. “I don’t want you to be hurt, hyung. I know Yifan-hyung is the best for you.”
Yifan.
Junmyeon’s chest tightened at the name. He closed his eyes regretfully. “I know he is. I just... When I told him you guys were waiting for me, he said he would just join us and I... I didn’t want that... I mean, everyone seems a bit off whenever he’s around...”
“That’s because something is off about him,” Kyungsoo grumbled. He paused for a moment to give Junmyeon a stern look. “You know that it would be better if he joins us than the two of you alone. No matter how awkward it would be.”
Junmyeon nodded apologetically. “I’ll do that. I’m so sorry, Kyungsoo-yah.”
“And stop apologizing. It’s not your fault.”
“But...it’s because I told him it was okay to be friends...”
Kyungsoo waved a hand as if to tell him that it didn’t matter. “It was rude anyway to say no to that. Don’t worry.” The younger male yawned and shuffled to his bed. “It’s late. Let’s just go to sleep, hyung. I have a test tomorrow.”
Junmyeon obeyed and changed into something more comfortable before climbing up to his bed. He tried to close his eyes to sleep but it didn’t work. Junmyeon slowly cracked his eyes opened to see if Kyungsoo was still awake. He wasn’t sure because the other male had his back on him, but Junmyeon tried anyway. “Kyungsoo-yah?”
“Hm?”
“Did you know that...he had a close friend?”
Kyungsoo turned to face Junmyeon from his bed. “...no.”
Junmyeon adjusted his head on his pillow and pondered. “He told me that his friend went missing a few months ago. It was like Ryeowook had just vanished without a trace. Some said he ran away with his boyfriend because their parents didn’t approve of their relationship. They have been close friends since high school, so when Ryeowook was gone without saying a single thing to him, it...it hurt.”
Kyungsoo stayed silent. Junmyeon pulled the blanket to cover half of his body.
“I kinda feel it. I mean...it was probably what Chen felt too when I left him...”
Kyungsoo chose to not response to that. He reached to the nightstand to turn off the lamp.
“Goodnight, hyung.”
“...goodnight, Kyungsoo-yah.”
***
The following week was busy as hell.
They didn’t have the time to hang out anymore, at least not until mid tests were done.
Between their times of studying, Kris would give Junmyeon a call and Kyungsoo could hear the older male’s soft, cheerful voice from the other side of the room. He had a feeling Junmyeon didn’t tell his boyfriend about Kyuhyun, but it was okay, as long as nothing bad happened.
As long as Junmyeon was okay.
It was the last day of the mid-tests and they went back to the dorm pretty late. Both of them were exhausted that they didn’t bother to change. Kyungsoo was about to sleep with his full clothes on when he heard a knock on the door. Junmyeon gave him a tired look as if to say that he was too tired to move. Kyungsoo scowled in distaste as he pulled himself off of the bed and had to drag himself toward the door.
It was no other than Kyuhyun.
“Hi, Kyungsoo-yah,” Kyuhyun gave him a friendly smile which Kyungsoo ignored. “Is Junmyeon home?”
Kyungsoo’s expression turned sour and he was about to say no, when suddenly Junmyeon showed up behind him.
“Who is it-oh.”
Bad timing.
Kyungsoo found himself gritting his teeth in great dislike. He glared at Kyuhyun and stood defensively in front of Junmyeon. “We’re tired, hyung.”
“It's just a cup of coffee,” Kyuhyun shrugged. “It would help you to ease up after all those tests. What do you say? You can come along, Kyungsoo-yah.”
Kyungsoo was about to retort angrily when Junmyeon quickly spoke behind him.
“Kyungsoo’s right. I’m-we’re a bit tired. It’s been a really exhausting day.”
“It won’t take long, I promise.”
Kyungsoo wanted to just slam the door right to Kyuhyun’s obnoxious grin but managed to prevent himself from doing so. He threw a disapproving look to Junmyeon and the latter caught he meant. Kyungsoo didn’t want him to go and he got that.
“I’m really sorry, hyung,” Junmyeon said apologetically. “Maybe-maybe next time?”
Kyuhyun’s expression dimmed and he pursed his lips in disappointment. “I see. Next time it is, then.” He didn’t look happy as he gave both Kyungsoo and Junmyeon one last long look before leaving.
Kyungsoo didn’t bother to wait for Kyuhyun to disappear from his peripheral vision to slam the door shut. He locked the door somewhat indignantly and gave Junmyeon a serious stare.
“I really think you should tell your boyfriend about this.”
***
“Yifan?”
“Junmyeon-ah. Hey.”
“I’m-I’m sorry, did I wake you?”
“No...I’m not asleep yet. We’re having a sleepover at Minseok’s. It was supposed to be a group study but then it changed into...into this mess. Maybe I should just go home.”
“This...mess? Does that mean none of you are studying?”
“Yeah. I will never trust Minseok ever again when he say ‘let’s do a study group in my house’. But who would want to study when tomorrow is Saturday, right? I knew something was off. He just wanted to show us the new game he bought.”
A soft chuckle. “Right. ...please be careful on your way home.”
“I will.”
“...okay.”
“...Junmyeon-ah?”
“Hm?”
“Is everything alright?”
“...yeah.”
“Are you sure?”
“...y-yeah, the exams were tiring but... I think I would at least get B+. Or A, if I’m lucky enough.”
“I’m not talking about exams. How’s everything? How’s your friends?”
“They’re...they’re okay.”
“They’ve been nice to you?”
“Y-yeah.”
His resolve began to waver.
“Junmyeon-ah, are you alright? Has anyone bothered you?”
“I... I think I have to go, Yifan. I don’t want to wake Kyungsoo up. He’s exhausted and I don’t want to disturb his beauty sleep...”
“Oh. Okay then. Sweet dreams, babe.”
Silence.
“...Yifan?”
“Yeah?”
“...I miss you.”
It took Kris a long moment to finally reply.
“I miss you too, baby.”
***
Junmyeon had been avoiding Kyuhyun like he was some sort of plague.
It was subtle at first. Junmyeon didn’t want anyone to think that he was being rude to the older male but it had evolved into something obvious because Kyuhyun just wouldn’t stop pestering him. He ran out of reasons to decline his invitation. Junmyeon almost couldn’t take it anymore everytime Kyuhyun appeared. How could someone be this dense? Wasn’t he being clear enough that it was a no?
And one day it just happened.
Kyungsoo was getting ready for his afternoon class when all of a sudden, Junmyeon kicked the door open. He wanted to scowl in protest but then his eyes widened at the older male’s condition. Junmyeon was a mess and clearly he had been crying. “Hyung??”
Junmyeon didn’t reply as he threw everything onto the floor and went straight for the fruit knife by their dining table. He grabbed it fiercely and stretched out his free hand. His other hand trembled badly as he hovered the sharp thing above his wrist.
“Hyung, what the hell are you doing??” Kyungsoo shouted in fear as he realized what his roommate was about to do. He lunged forward to slap the knife away just in time and it flew out of their reach. The knife fell with a terrifying sound to the floor and Kyungsoo cringed. Junmyeon screamed and tried to reach for it again, but Kyungsoo hugged him tightly so that he wouldn’t be able to. “Hyung, stop!”
Junmyeon broke into tears as he slowly dropped to his knees. He became limp as he let Kyungsoo pulled himself into a tight embrace and sobbed. “Yifan...”
Kyungsoo let the older male cried in his arms, even though he himself hadn’t recovered from the fact that Junmyeon was trying to kill himself. He glanced at the knife worriedly, just in case Junmyeon was still planning to grab it but it was still out of their reach. He looked up when he heard a thud from the doorway and saw Baekhyun standing with his hand on the doorknob.
Baekhyun was expressionless.
“Baekhyun-hyung?”
“I saw what happened.”
Kyungsoo frowned and opened his mouth to ask more, but then Junmyeon moved slightly and he fixed his attention back to him. He widened his eyes when he saw a fresh kiss mark on Junmyeon’s collarbone and suddenly everything just fell into place. Kyungsoo scanned the pretty male’s face intently. His lips were a bit bruised-someone obviously had kissed him a bit too roughly.
After a few quiet moments-Baekhyun only stood there without a word-Junmyeon’s sob finally came to a stop. Kyungsoo waited patiently until the male drifted to a deep slumber and he slowly lifted him up to his bed with the help from Baekhyun. Junmyeon instinctively curled into a ball and mumbled his boyfriend’s name longingly.
“Yifan...”
Kyungsoo gritted his teeth in anger and looked at Baekhyun. “What happened, hyung?”
Baekhyun grimaced. “Told him that he played too hard to get.”
***
Junmyeon slowly grew back to his old self.
He was starting to close himself again, just like the first time he came to Seoul. Those beautiful smiles slowly, but surely, were peeled off of his face and Kyungsoo despised it. Even those precious phone calls couldn’t bring a sincere smile to Junmyeon’s pretty face anymore. Sure, Junmyeon would still smile into the phone like everything was alright, but it was Kyungsoo who witnessed his array of facial expressions. His smile didn’t even reach his eyes.
Junmyeon was lying to Kris.
Kyungsoo kind of understood what he felt. They were in a long distance relationship and surely Junmyeon just didn’t want Kris to be worried. But his condition was getting poorer each day and he refused to eat. Kyungsoo became genuinely worried and he wondered if Kris would be able to sense it through Junmyeon’s tone that his boyfriend wasn’t alright.
Baekhyun dropped by a lot to check on Junmyeon’s condition. Sometimes Chanyeol would follow behind him and he gave Kyungsoo a look as if to ask what happened, but none of them said anything. Kyungsoo wanted him to talk, but it didn’t seem like Junmyeon would be willing to. To think that he didn’t even tell the truth to his boyfriend.
Kyungsoo didn’t know when Junmyeon had started ignoring his phone.
It pained Kyungsoo to notice it, because all he ever wanted was just to see Junmyeon’s smile and it could only happen whenever Kris was calling. Junmyeon would steal a glance at his screen and the gleam in his eyes would diminish. He pushed the phone away under the pillow as it continued to vibrate. Whenever Junmyeon did pick up, he would apologize for being busy while Kyungsoo knew perfectly that he wasn’t. The pretty male also did his best to keep his voice indifferent because maybe, all he wanted to do was just to burst out crying and tell Kris everything.
But Junmyeon never did it.
Junmyeon was in the shower that night when his phone vibrated again. Kyungsoo fixed an inquisitive gaze at the screen and his heartbeat quickened.
Yifan was calling.
Kyungsoo glanced to the direction of the bathroom before looking away. He didn’t want to poke his nose into his friend’s affair. But something in him stubbornly argued that he needed to. Kris needed to know-it was his right for being Junmyeon’s boyfriend. Hell, Kyungsoo always told Jongin everything-even the most unimportant things. But what would Kris feel if he knew about Junmyeon’s condition from Kyungsoo? What if they get into a big fight?
However, at the third attempt of Kris’ call and the annoying vibrating sound of the phone, Kyungsoo found himself grabbing the phone. The sound of the water running in the bathrom indicated that Junmyeon was still inside. He swallowed nervously before picking up.
“Yifan-hyung? This is Kyungsoo.”
Kyungsoo’s eyes drifted to the bathroom door cautiously. The water was still running.
“How did you-“
His eyes widened. He held his breath as he listened to every word before nodding firmly.
“I understand. I will help, hyung.”
***
“Come join the party in the gymnastic building tonight,” Jongin read the flyer in his hand loudly and he almost snorted. “Yeah right, if by partying means getting high and one night stands.” The tanned skin male turned to his friends with a shrug. “I don’t know about you guys, but I could definitely use a free beer or two.”
“Sounds fun,” Chanyeol chirped happily. “Are we going, Baekhyunie?”
Baekhyun stared at him contemplatively. “The thought of us making out in such a crowd turns you on, right?”
Chanyeol grinned impishly as he patted Baekhyun’s head with such affection and the latter rolled his eyes. “My baby.”
“Alright, it’s settled then. We’re going,” Jongin stared at Junmyeon noncommittally. “What about you, hyung?”
“I...I guess I’ll go if it’s with you guys,” Junmyeon said hesitantly and looked around. “Where’s Kyungsoo?”
The others seemed to froze for a split of second at the question.
“He said he got something to do,” Jongin replied and shrugged for the umpteenth time that afternoon. “Since I’m going, Kyungsoo will definitely go. How about we pick you up at the dorm, hyung?”
***
Junmyeon regretted going as soon as they arrived.
He scanned the crowded place for Kyungsoo, but the male was still nowhere to be found. The place was hot and full of smoke and the music was deafening.
Jongin had disappeared the moment they arrived at the building, and Chanyeol and Baekhyun were lost in their heated make-out session beside him. Junmyeon forgot his regret for a while as he stared at the couple in amusement. The way their lips molded with each other was perfect and it grew something akin to jealousy in Junmyeon. He smiled bitterly to himself at the possibility that he would be able to do the same thing with Kris if he was ever around.
“Juice?”
Junmyeon was jolted out of his reverie and his every other thought vanished instantly. When he spotted Kyuhyun in front of him with a plastic glass, Junmyeon felt himself growing with fear and the only thing he could think about was Yifan.
Baekhyun broke his intimate kiss with Chanyeol and earned a protest from the taller of the two. He was still breathless from the kisses as he stared at Junmyeon and Kyuhyun beside them. Chanyeol automatically followed his boyfriend’s gaze.
“No, thank you,” Junmyeon said rather loudly because the music was blasting, it was starting to hurt his ears.
“I’m sorry, Junmyeon-ah,” Kyuhyun eagerly said as he leaned forward. “I’m sorry for everything.”
It was not exactly the brightest place to apologize but Junmyeon found himself nodding for the sake of Kyuhyun walking away from him. “It’s-it’s okay. Don’t worry about it-“
“What do you say if we get out of here to talk? It’s so damn loud!”
Junmyeon felt something warm on his hand and he turned to look at Baekhyun. The younger male shook his head subtly at him and Junmyeon understood what he meant. But Kyuhyun already yanked his wrist off of Baekhyun’s hand in a harsh way and Junmyeon winced.
“You’re not two anymore,” Kyuhyun growled. “You can decide anything without their help.”
“I’ll look for Jongin,” Chanyeol said quietly to his boyfriend as the taller of the two began to walk away for his friend. He disappeared into the dancing crowd within seconds.
“Let’s go,” Kyuhyun ordered darkly to Junmyeon. He was soon stopped by Baekhyun.
“You can’t force someone,” Baekhyun said as he shook his head.
“Oh yeah? Well you have no right to tell me what to do,” Kyuhyun said angrily and shoved Baekhyun aside. The other male let out a painful yelp as his back met the cold, flat wall.
“Wait!” Junmyeon exclaimed in panic. “O-okay, I’ll go with you, just don’t hurt anyone!”
“Hyung,” Baekhyun clutched his shoulder with a hiss. Clearly the male was hurt.
“It’s okay,” Junmyeon tried to calm him down even though his own lips were trembling badly. “Are you alright?”
“Let’s go,” Kyuhyun viciously dragged Junmyeon to exit the building. Junmyeon threw a worried look over his shoulder to Baekhyun once again before disappearing from the sight.
A slow smirk was tugging at Baekhyun’s lips as he licked his lips.
“Checkmate.”
***
Kyuhyun brought Junmyeon to his car. The male parked his car a bit far from the building so they weren’t easy to spot from the said place. There was almost no one in the parking lot-Junmyeon saw a few kids laughing and walking into the building-because everyone seemed to be partying inside. The weather was cold and Junmyeon found himself shivering. Kyuhyun smiled to him from inside the car and patted the empty spot beside him. “Come in.”
Junmyeon was sober enough to know that he didn’t want to. “Maybe-maybe I should go back-“
“Junmyeon, I’m so sorry.”
Junmyeon stiffened at his words. “For...for what?”
“For kissing you in front of my friends. I know that it was a bad thing to do and...”
“It’s-it’s okay,” Junmyeon said quickly even though he wasn’t sure if it was the right thing to say. “We-we make mistakes...”
“Gosh, what is this that I’m feeling? I can’t stop thinking about you...”
Junmyeon didn’t want to hear more. He turned around to walk away, but Kyuhyun managed to snatch his wrist and pulled him into the car. “No!”
“Oh, yes,” Kyuhyun chuckled darkly and quickly pinned Junmyeon beneath him. “You’re not going anywhere.”
Junmyeon gasped as he felt something wet pressing on his jaw. “H-hyung?”
“Ssh,” Kyuhyun whispered as he trailed his tongue along Junmyeon’s smooth chin. “It’s okay...”
“N-no,” Junmyeon had to close his eyes. “Please don’t hurt me, hyung. What are you doing to me?”
“Do you trust me?”
“Hyung, please stop-“
“Junmyeon-ah, it’s you who have to stop. Don’t you trust me?”
Junmyeon pushed Kyuhyun with all the strength he had and and became breathless like he had just run a few miles. “Please, Kyuhyun-hyung. Stop.”
“It’s okay, Junmyeon-ah, I’m not gonna hurt you-“
“Don’t touch me!” Junmyeon screamed as Kyuhyun lunged forward to catch his lips in a heated kiss. Their lips met halfway but Junmyeon broke the kiss and accidentally slapped Kyuhyun away. “Yifan, help!”
The slap made Kyuhyun stopped moving and he grunted in pain. Junmyeon squirmed under his grip and his face showed obvious fear. Kyuhyun slowly smirked as excitement waved over him. “That boyfriend of yours,” Kyuhyun snickered obnoxiously and wiped his mouth with the back of his arm. “Is he even real?”
Junmyeon stunned. “W-what?”
“You were playing so hard to get, Junmyeon-ah...by making up a nonexistent boyfriend. That’s quite a clever idea.”
“B-but-Yifan is-“
“It worked alright,” Kyuhyun purred as he started unbuttoning Junmyeon’s shirt. “It turned me on so bad and I wanted to have you.” His hand made its way to grasp Junmyeon’s crotch and the latter bit his bottom lip to not moan. He tried to swat Kyuhyun’s hands away but to no avail. Junmyeon gasped as Kyuhyun started stroking him down there. Instead of pleasure, Junmyeon felt painful. The way Kyuhyun wrapped his fingers around him was rough, unlike Kris.
Junmyeon’s tears were starting to form at the thought that a man other than Kris was touching him. He felt ashamed. Junmyeon let out a painful cry when Kyuhyun attacked his lips again, this time biting him rather harshly.
“Yifan-“, he breathed helplessly.
He wanted to die.
“Don't touch him.”
The sound of the window being smashed grinded everything to a halt and Kyuhyun abruptly pulled away. Junmyeon, who was still a bit dazed from everything could only watch weakly as the door to his right was opened and someone had detached Kyuhyun forcefully from him. The male let out a confused scream and a second later he went silent.
The deep voice from before rang a bell. Junmyeon’s vision was still blurred when he saw a blond haired male got into the car and pulled him into an embrace. He almost choked.
It couldn’t be.
“Are you alright?”
Junmyeon fluttered his eyes closed as he felt a great feeling of secure being in those arms. He leaned more into the touch and refused to open his eyes, as if he was afraid it was only a dream.
“Yi-Yifan...?”
“I’m here,” Kris whispered soothingly as he carried Junmyeon out of the car. “I’m here, Junmyeon-ah.”
***
“Please don’t hurt me!”
Junmyeon didn’t have a clue where they were. All he knew that he was safe in Kris’ arms and he saw Minseok angrily holding a baseball bat. Yixing and Zitao only stared at the bleeding male underneath them. Once his vision cleared, Junmyeon looked around frantically. The place was dark and the only lighting available was the natural light from the moon. They seemed to have brought Kyuhyun to a deserted warehouse, someplace far from the university.
“Yeah right,” Kris growled. “Just in case you didn’t notice, my boyfriend begged the same thing too when you tried to touch him.”
“I-I didn’t know-“
“If he has a boyfriend? I’m sure he has told you he’s seeing someone.”
“I-I didn’t know if he was serious-“
“No use talking to him ge. What are we going to do?” Minseok asked lazily. He looked dangerous with the bat in his hand.
Kris’ eyes darkened. “What he deserves.”
His boyfriend’s expression scared the hell out of Junmyeon. “Yi-Yifan, wait,” Junmyeon stammered. “I’m okay, I’m really okay. Please, just let him go.”
“No,” Kris said in mere disgust as he continued to stare at Kyuhyun. “He touched you a few times and you didn’t say anything to me.”
Junmyeon deadpanned in horror. “That’s-how did you-“
“What are you so scared about? Why didn’t you tell me? And you’ve been having thoughts about killing yourself, haven’t you? Those midnight calls-you were thinking, weren’t you?”
Junmyeon lowered his gaze in shame. “I...”
Kris would have attacked Junmyeon more with questions if someone hadn’t butted in.
“What is this?”
All of a sudden, Kyungsoo showed up out of nowhere. Junmyeon's jaw dropped at the sight before his eyes and wondered how did he manage to get to the place. A second later, Jongin appeared behind him and stepped into the room. Junmyeon didn’t understand. How did they get there? Both Kyungsoo and Jongin looked stunned at the sight of the bleeding Kyuhyun.
“Why haven’t you finished him yet?” Kyungsoo asked with a frown.
Junmyeon’s heart almost stopped beating at his question Kyungsoo-yah...?
“Waiting for order,” Minseok puffed his cheeks in annoyance. "By the way, nice place, Kyungsoo-yah. Glad to have you on our side."
“K-Kyungsoo-yah,” Junmyeon stuttered in confusion. He almost didn’t get what was going on. Everyone seemed angry-even Jongin, who had said nothing ever since he stepped in-and it was obvious that they wanted Kyuhyun to be hurt. But the good side in Junmyeon still told him that it was all wrong. “Please...tell them that Kyuhyun-hyung did nothing to me. He was just drunk. He didn’t mean to. He didn’t mean anything.”
Kyungsoo stared at Junmyeon with an unreadable expression. Junmyeon almost shuddered because even Kyungsoo was starting to scare him. The latter pursed his lips in a contemplative way before shaking his head slowly. “No. He’s evil. He deserves it.”
Junmyeon froze. “What...?”
“He’s evil, hyung.”
“B-but-Kyungsoo-yah“, Junmyeon cried in disbelief and turned to his boyfriend. “Yifan, please-“
“Hey,” Minseok suddenly said to Kyuhyun. “I heard you lost your best friend.”
Kyuhyun wiped the blood away with the back of his hand as he frowned. His tone was calm but his expression showed that he was conflicted. “You mean...Ryeowook? I didn’t lose him. He ran away to be with his boyfriend.”
Zitao snorted in response and Yixing erupted into fits of laughter.
Minseok rolled his eyes. “Are you stupid or what? Do you really believe that? Has he ever tried contacting you ever since he ran away? He’s like what-your partner in crime? You guys have been really close and all of a sudden he just disappeared from your life?”
Zitao muttered something along the line of ‘stupid’.
“What are you suggesting?” Kyuhyun screamed in frustration.
“We knew it was you,” Minseok snarled in such a scary way that Junmyeon had to look away. He reached out for Kris’ hand and intertwined their fingers together. “We knew it was you and Ryeowook who went for a drive in our hometown and killed someone.”
Kyuhyun went pale and he had a hard time swallowing. “...what?”
“You killed a mother of two. The family broke down after her death while you escaped back here, continued living your perfect life,” Minseok added obscenely. He threw a sympathetic look to Junmyeon and pointed a finger at him. “And the person that you want to fuck so much, is one of her sons.”
Kyuhyun blanched.
The whole room was consumed by suffocating silence. None of them seemed to be brave enough to fracture it.
Junmyeon’s jaw dropped as anger was starting to build in him. All the doubts he had were gone. Suddenly, he wasn’t sure which one was right and which one wasn’t. But to have Kyuhyun there, bleeding, trembling in fear, the cause of everything-he caused his family to crumble and go separate ways while he lived in his perfection... It was so fucking nauseating and yet so right at the same time. Junmyeon let go of Kris’ hand and placed it over his mouth. He was shaking in anger.
“Junmyeon-“, Kyuhyun said desperately as he shook his head. “Junmyeon-I swear, it was a mistake, we were drunk, we didn’t see her, we didn’t-“
“You escaped,” Junmyeon said in a saccharine voice. “You escaped after you hit her.”
“I swear I didn’t do it on purpose-Ryeowook was-Ryeowook-“
“It was you who drove the damn car,” Minseok hissed. The room was filled with the clattering sound of the baseball bat against the floor. “Stop blaming everything on your dead friend and man up to admit your mistakes!”
“Junmyeon-ah, help me! I swear to God I-wait...”, Kyuhyun held his breath as he looked up to Minseok. “Did you just say...dead...friend?”
“Oh,” Minseok broke into an evil grin and behind him, Yixing couldn’t stop laughing. “I forgot to ask you the big question. Come on, as a friend...you can’t be that naive, Kyuhyun. Have you ever wondered what happened to your little Ryeowook?”
“Just finish him already,” Zitao scowled vehemently “Ge, one word from you and I’ll break his neck with a single kick.”
Kyungsoo moved closer to Jongin for protection. He had a feeling he was about to witness something terrible.
“Close your eyes,” Kris demanded to Junmyeon and his boyfriend obediently did as he was told. The blond male pulled the latter closer to his chest. “It will be over soon. Just close your eyes.”
“You didn’t,” Kyuhyun shook his head in fear. He tried to crawl away from Minseok who was starting to swing the baseball bat, but stopped because Yixing and Zitao were moving from their spots to prevent him from running. “Please, I beg you, please-“
Minseok squinted his eyes as he aimed for the obvious spot with the bat in his hands: Kyuhyun’s head.
“Oh, we did,” Minseok’s grin widened. “We just pushed him into the moving train.”
***
Junmyeon pretended he didn’t hear Kyuhyun’s painful scream and the sound of a head being smashed by a baseball bat numerous times. It was sickening, but in Kris’ arms, Junmyeon felt like he was safe because he knew his boyfriend would never do anything harmful to him.
He didn’t say anything when Minseok and Yixing dragged the lifeless body out of the warehouse, saying something like they were going to dump the body far far away and Kyungsoo gave in to help. He didn’t say anything when Zitao said he would stay behind to clean up the mess. He also didn’t say anything when Kris put him gingerly on his bed, back at his dorm, telling him to rest and Junmyeon immediately hugged his body. His hands wouldn’t stop trembling.
It stopped only when Kris lie beside him and cupped his chin gently. The male pressed a soft kiss against his lips and Junmyeon let out a shaky moan. It was like the kiss had been the greatest remedy because he gradually stopped shaking. Junmyeon slowly kissed back because all he could think about at the moment was his boyfriend and how much he had missed him.
“Go to sleep, Junmyeon-ah.”
Junmyeon seek warmth from Kris’ lips once again before sighing. “Yifan...?”
“Hm?” Kris hummed.
“Do you...do you love me...?”
Kris paused for a moment. “More than anything.”
Junmyeon curled his fingers into Kris’ tightly. He felt terribly scared and confused. “Don’t ever let me go, then...”
“I’m not intending to.”
“Please stay, Yifan...”
Kris stayed quiet. The room was a bit cold, but the closeness of their bodies made it warm. Junmyeon kept on shutting his eyes closed because he was scared to look at Kris, he didn’t want him to go away. His heart was starting to beat so fast like it was trying to leap out of his chest. The beat was banging loudly in his ears and he wondered if Kris was able to hear his uneasiness.
“Yifan...?” He whispered even though he knew the male was still there, holding his hands. He just wanted to make sure How did Kyungsoo get into all of this?
Kris shifted his body for a more comfortable position to hold Junmyeon, still holding him close to his chest. “Junmyeon-ah.”
Junmyeon hummed tiredly in response.
“There’s something you need to know.”
The pretty male cracked his eyes opened, but still didn’t have the courage to look at his boyfriend. He stayed still, eyes drilling holes on Kris’ shirt. Something in Kris’ tone told him that it was going to be something awful.
“I’ve been lying to you.”
Junmyeon’s throat became dry What have you been lying about?
“I will stay,” Kris said sternly. “But only because you want me to.”
What are you saying? Of course I want you to...
Kris buried his nose on Junmyeon’s silky hair and tightened his embrace. “This is not the right time. We can talk about this tomorrow. Right now, I want you to just sleep.”
Junmyeon was too drained to reply. He could only sob weakly in response. He didn’t know what to say, everything was just too much for him to digest at the moment. He couldn’t say anything but to pull Kris closer and whispered, “I love you, Yifan. I love you...”
Kris took a long pause before replying.
“I love you more, Junmyeon-ah.”
***
Kyungsoo didn’t go back to their dorm the next day.
Junmyeon wondered if the male stayed over at Jongin’s place to give him some private time with Kris.
By the time he woke up, he was in the car, feeling a bit dizzy from all the long trip. Junmyeon had lost track of time how long they had been in the street. They were taking quite a trip with the rental car and Junmyeon could only see trees as far as they went. The pretty male rubbed his eyes sleepily and straightened up in his seat.
“Hey,” Kris gently caressed his cheek with a thumb. “You’re awake.”
“Hm,” Junmyeon blinked rapidly. “Where are we going?”
“Someplace.”
“Where are you taking me, Yifan?”
“We’re almost there.”
“But where?” Junmyeon almost cried in frustration. “Yifan, you scared me...please tell me what’s going on.”
“Just a little bit more...bear with it for a while.”
It was almost dark when they finally stopped in a secluded area. It was quite far from the town and Junmyeon found himself biting his lip in worry. They were stopping by a bridge. Kris turned off the engine and got off of the car first before walking to the passenger’s side to open the door for him. Junmyeon couldn’t tear himself away from Kris’ iron grip and let himself be dragged out. His strength was nothing compared to the blond male.
The pretty male was soon pinned onto the barrier. Junmyeon glanced over his shoulder and gulped in fear. The sea looked deep underneath them.
“Yifan...?”
Kris softly molded their lips together and Junmyeon fluttered his eyes closed. The kiss was achingly tender and sweet. Junmyeon ignored the way his skin prickled at the contact. It reminded him of Kyuhyun’s rough lips on him and he gasped almost hysterically, but the way Kris swept his bang from his forehead let him know that it was his boyfriend who was kissing him and no other. Slowly, Junmyeon went back to being himself and intentionally kissed back.
The taller male was the one who pulled away first but he never broke their eye contact.
The silence rang painfully in Junmyeon’s ears as he pulled Kris closer for another kiss.
Kris gave in before exhaling slowly through his nose.
“The plan,” he slowly spoke. “Was to get Kyuhyun.”
Junmyeon grabbed a fistful hand of Kris’ shirt. “Huh...?”
“It’s a revenge,” Kris continued. “A revenge...for you and Chen.”
“A revenge...?”
Kris pursed his lips grimly. “We planned this. Everyone. Including Chen, himself.”
A disbelief look was chiseled onto Junmyeon’s face and the male started pulling away from Kris. “You-you knew? All along, you knew? Including Minseok, Yixing and everyone? And-and you lied to me?”
“Junmyeon, please.”
“Wh-what else did you lie to me about?” Junmyeon tried to push Kris away but the taller male was too stubborn to let him go. His breath became ragged. “Did you lie about...us, too?”
Kris had never looked so determined before. “If there was one thing that I didn’t lie to you, it was my feelings. I love you, Junmyeon, I love you so much that I’m willing to do these kind of things.”
Junmyeon let Kris gently caressed his cheeks and couldn’t help but loving everything the taller male did to him. “What are you trying to say, Yifan...?”
“You asked me to stay and I answered I would, if it was what you really wished for.”
Junmyeon was about to say something but soon closed his mouth again. He held his breath as he realized a car pulled over near their car, followed by another car. “Yifan-“
“Junmyeon, you can’t run away forever. You’ve been avoiding things too long. You need to face your fear.”
Minseok was the first to get out of the car. He was soon followed by the others.
“Yifan, I’m scared-what are you going to-“
Kris shifted his body to block Junmyeon’s eyesight from his friends. “Please give me a chance, Junmyeon-ah. If you want me to disappear after this, I will. You can just forget everything that happens between us.” Kris took a deep breath. “But...if you ever, ever still want me to stay... You need to get ready because I’m talking about a lifetime commitment.”
With that, Kris slowly took a step back.
Kris’ warmth was soon replaced by cool air and Junmyeon encouraged himself to shift his gaze to the others.
Everyone was there-including Kyungsoo and Jongin. The second car hadn’t turned off its engine and the window in the passenger’s seat suddenly was rolled down and Baekhyun peeked with a grin. Junmyeon instinctively smiled back even though he couldn’t think. All of them were smiling. Their smile were calming and Junmyeon almost couldn’t take it anymore. He didn’t have a clue what was going on.
“Please...just tell me the truth,” Junmyeon pleaded.
No one said anything but then a figure appeared behind Minseok.
Junmyeon’s heartbeat increased dramatically at the familiar figure. His hand flew to cover his mouth and he started trembling again. He threw a judging gaze to Kris, but within a second the taller of the two knew that it was not anger. It was also not hate. Junmyeon was simply relieved underneath the confusion.
“Chen...?”
Jongdae smiled brightly.
“Hello, hyung.”
End.
WHAT IS THIS THAT I’M WRITING HELP
Author: Flowerymisha
Pairing: KrisHo
Warning: BoyxBoy love. Enough said.
Summary: There was always a painful truth behind everything.
Author’s Note: Too much crying. Character death. Awful plot. Weak bottom. You’ve been warned T_T Can I write a story where Kyungsoo is protective over Junmyeon? YES I CAN AND PLEASE, NO TRANSLATIONS ALLOWED!
[Anomaly]
Junmyeon climbed up the barrier and looked down daringly.
He could see the pavement under and a tinge of fear crept into him. Junmyeon pressed his lips together, trying his best to prevent the tears that were coming. He was there by the rooftop all alone and his thought drifted to Jongdae. He pictured himself in the same position as his brother the night he died. What made it different was that there was no train approaching. Junmyeon thought of the chances of surviving if he jumped down...
Maybe, just maybe, that way he would be able to reunite with his brother.
The pretty male instinctively reached for his phone and speed dialing a number without even looking at the screen. For a split second, his fear subsided and all he wanted to do was to forget everything. He felt so lonely even with the presence of his friends. He felt tired waking up in the middle of the night because of the nightmares regarding his family.
But most of all, it was because he hated himself.
Junmyeon loathed himself so much that he just wanted to die. He could still feel those unwanted hands lingering on him and his thoughts ran to his boyfriend. The only person who was able to make him better. The only person who was able to make him felt loved and priceless. The only person he would allow to touch him.
He buried his face into his hands as he stifled a sob. Junmyeon felt so weak without him.
“Junmyeon-ah?”
The voice suddenly floated over the speaker.
It was enough to make Junmyeon gasped and took a step back from the barrier as he cried,
“Yifan.”
Six months had passed so quickly.
Without them realizing, it had been six months since Junmyeon came back from his hometown with a shattered heart. None of them counted the days. It was a wonder how those times were gone in a blink of an eye-it seemed just like yesterday when Junmyeon came back and burst out crying in front of Kyungsoo and the others.
But it had also been six months since Junmyeon had changed. He had begun to open himself up to his friends and his gloomy expressions started fading away. The hint of sadness was no longer there and people began to take notice of how truly beautiful Junmyeon was. The male smiled a lot and it was not just a typical smile. It was a sincere, kind hearted smile-the one that would make people stop doing whatever it was that they were doing to steal a glance at him.
But Junmyeon was at his best whenever he received a phone call from a certain someone. It was like all of his pain were taken away from him and Junmyeon was wrapped in endless bliss during these moments. Kyungsoo, being his roommate, was the first to notice this. Even though he and Junmyeon never took the time to sit and talk heart to heart again (after the heartbreaking confession about his hometown), it slipped once from the older male that he had a boyfriend and Kyungsoo was content to know that much.
Yifan.
The name slipped out a lot from Junmyeon’s lips between the phone calls. The person who would bring a smile to his face whenever he called. The person who would make him blush shyly because of something he said. The person that Junmyeon would say ‘I miss you’ to whenever they weren’t able to hold back their feelings anymore.
Junmyeon was in love with Kris and the feeling was mutual.
The male was starting to socialize that more and more people were beginning to notice him. He wasn’t exactly popular like Jongin or Chanyeol, but it was enough. At least Junmyeon was now brave enough to look at his classmates in the eye and send them a blinding smile.
A lot of people had started to confess.
It brought a shock to Junmyeon because he had never thought something like that would happen. Some of them were bold enough to show it while the others preferred the old fashioned way such as love letters or through a much modern way-emails. They were all turned down, of course. Junmyeon turned a beet red at the umpteenth sudden confessions addressed to him that week and apologized instantly. The male-a senior named Kangin-hung his head dejectedly at the rejection but was still brave enough to ask.
“Am I not good enough for you?”
“It’s not that,” Junmyeon shook his head in exasperation. Again, for the umpteenth time that week. “I-I’m seeing someone.”
“Oh,” Kangin’s face brightened a bit because at least the problem didn’t lie in him. A sour grin was etched onto his face as he spoke. “What a lucky guy. Well, I hope everything goes well for both of you...”
Junmyeon earnestly thanked the older male before walking away. He hoped there would be no sudden confessions anymore for the rest of the week (or even forever).The campus should have known by then that he was seeing someone and he didn’t have any intention to break up-or worse, cheating. Junmyeon dragged a hand down his face and sighed.
He missed his boyfriend so badly.
***
“I like you.”
This one probably could be categorized as one of the bold ones because he just came out of nowhere and decided to say the magic words.
Junmyeon and Kyungsoo were at the canteen, enjoying their meals in peace when someone came to their table unexpectedly. Both of them stopped eating and Kyungsoo caught Junmyeon grimacing slightly, as if to say ‘oh no, not again’. The latter shifted his gaze offhandedly from his lunch to Junmyeon and to the voice with a frown.
Confessing when there’s someone else around? How confident.
Kyungsoo spotted his seonbae, Kyuhyun, standing in front of them with a hopeful look on his face. His eyes weren’t directed to Kyungsoo, because Kyuhyun surely knew about his relationship with Jongin and no one would be stupid enough-even the seniors-to mess around with Jongin. So it could only mean that it was addressed to the other male by the table. Kyungsoo’s gaze was soon directed to his friend who sat across him.
Junmyeon’s fork never made it to his mouth. He slowly put the thing down to his plate and looked up in confusion.
The three of them were embraced with silence until Kyuhyun finally decided to repeat his words.
“I like you, Junmyeon-ah.”
It took Junmyeon quite a while to catch the said words and blinked. “O-oh.”
“If you’re not seeing anyone at the moment-“
“He is,” Kyungsoo said abruptly and the other two turned to look at him within a swift second. The doe eyed male clasped a hand over his mouth, realizing that it wasn’t his place to say so.
“Hi, Kyungsoo,” Kyuhyun greeted politely. “I didn’t see you there.”
“Hi, hyung,” Kyungsoo mumbled and busied himself with his unfinished lunch.
“But he’s right,” Junmyeon added hastily. “I’m seeing someone.”
Kyuhyun didn’t flinch and his smile grew even wider. “So I heard. But what can I say, I like you so much. And that doesn’t stop the possibility of us to be friends, right? Even with that ‘in a relationship’ status of yours.” Kyungsoo gaped slightly because he thought Kyuhyun was being rude. “And if you don’t mind me asking, is it someone in the university?”
Junmyeon went blank at all the questions. It was new to him. Usually everyone would just blatantly take his answer and walk away. Who would want to be friends after confessing and got rejected in return? Apparently, this Kyuhyun was different. “No, he’s...he’s someone from my hometown.”
“Ah.” Something glinted in Kyuhyun’s eyes. “Hometown... Well, you know, me and Kyungsoo are in the same club...maybe we could hang out sometimes.”
Junmyeon threw an uncomfortable gaze to Kyungsoo who just stared back at him lifelessly. “Oh...I...I guess?”
“Good,” Kyuhyun grinned. “So, I’ll see you around?”
When the pretty male didn’t say anything, Kyuhyun took it as a hint that he should go but he didn't take it as a rejection. The male apologized for disturbing their lunch and walked away rather happily.
Kyungsoo waited until Kyuhyun was out of their eyesight. “You should tell your boyfriend, hyung,” he said and pointed his fork toward Junmyeon’s direction. “I sense something from him. And not a good one, that is.”
Junmyeon sighed softly and shoved his plate aside. He had clearly lost his appetite and sank lower in his seat. Something about Kyuhyun scared him and he didn’t like it.
Kyungsoo stared at him and Junmyeon knew the younger male knew what he was thinking.
Junmyeon wanted to see Kris so badly.
***
Kyuhyun was persistent.
Kyungsoo’s hunch was right but Junmyeon didn’t know if it was good or bad. The older male started appearing and joining their group and it was the first time for someone as sweet as Kyungsoo showed his death glare. The first time it happened, Baekhyun was the only person who greeted Kyuhyun too cheerfully-apparently he was in the same club too with Kyuhyun and Kyungsoo.
Junmyeon could feel his and Kyungsoo’s smile faltering at the sight of Kyuhyun greeting the group and it completely vanished when the older male happily accepted Jongin’s fake courtesy to join them. Kyungsoo sagged in his seat, nudging Jongin not so subtly in protest. Baekhyun gave his friends a confused gaze and Chanyeol was the only one who seemed oblivious to the sudden change of atmosphere. Junmyeon, being Kyuhyun’s real target, could only offer a half watt smile.
Jongin never invited Kyuhyun to join anymore.
But Kyuhyun dropped by a lot, much to Kyungsoo’s dismay.
Everyone seemed to notice how moody Kyungsoo became whenever Kyuhyun joined them. Junmyeon knew it was his fault. If only he didn’t tell the taller male that they could be friends. But...wasn’t it just rude if he said no? And to think that he was their senior...
Unlike usual, Kyuhyun approached Junmyeon when he was alone that day.
The pretty male wanted to run at the sight of Kyuhyun walking to his locker, but he couldn’t because he had seen him and the latter had caught his eyes, too. Junmyeon was busted.
“Hey, Junmyeon-ah.”
Junmyeon forced himself to smile as he gazed up to the older male. “H-hyung.”
“I was wondering if you’re free...”
It was a good question because the answer was no, Junmyeon wasn’t free. He had a lot of homeworks to do and his friends were already waiting by the usual spot.
Junmyeon shook his head as polite as he could and closed his locker with a hand. “I’m so sorry, hyung. My friends are waiting for me-“
“Your friends? Cool. We can just join them.”
Junmyeon deadpanned. The thought of Kyuhyun joining them (again) and how grumpy Kyungsoo would become made him rethink his answer. Maybe, maybe if he gave in to Kyuhyun just this time, the male would just leave and never bother him again. Would it work, Junmyeon didn’t know, but it was worth a try. He sighed in defeat. “What do you want, hyung?”
“How about a movie?”
“I have homeworks...”, Junmyeon trailed off.
“Then a nice cup of coffee will do,” Kyuhyun grinned sheepishly and ran a hand through his hair. “Shall we?”
“But...”
“I promise you it won’t take long.”
It was transparent as crystal clear that Junmyeon was hesitant, but in the end he nodded as an answer.
He didn't want Kyungsoo to get into a bad mood was all.
***
'It won't take long' turned out to be a couple of long hours.
Junmyeon sighed because he knew he shouldn’t have trusted Kyuhyun. He should’ve just trusted his instinct to decline the invitation.
The male came back pretty late to the dorm that night. He paid extra care not to make a sound-he didn't want to wake his roommate up, Kyungsoo must have been asleep by then. But it turned out that he was wrong.
Kyungsoo’s voice sent his thoughts flying. “Where have you been, hyung?”
Junmyeon flinched in surprise as he saw the younger male put his hands on his hips, giving him a judging look. He chewed his inner cheek as he closed the door softly behind him. “I...I did my homeworks at a cafe nearby.”
It wasn’t entirely a lie. But Kyungsoo wouldn’t buy it so easily.
“All alone?”
Junmyeon tossed his sneakers nonchalantly to the shoerack and did his best to avoid Kyungsoo’s eyes. He thought of making up excuses but he decided he wouldn’t. He didn’t want to lie to his friend, especially not to Kyungsoo. “...no.”
Kyungsoo narrowed his eyes suspiciously. “Were you with Kyuhyun-hyung?” When Junmyeon didn’t answer, Kyungsoo groaned loudly. “Hyung, was that a date?”
“N-no.”
“How can you be so sure? What if Kyuhyun-hyung thinks so?”
“He-he knows I’m seeing someone-“
“He’s showing you that he doesn’t care, hyung! How can you be so blind at that??”
Junmyeon shut his eyes at Kyungsoo’s rising tone. He knew the younger male was upset and it was rare for him to be. Kyungsoo was usually so full of understanding and kind hearted and he wouldn’t judge anyone. But this time, it was different.
“Did you tell your boyfriend about this?”
Junmyeon still hesitated to look at Kyungsoo and feebly shook his head. “...no.”
Kyungsoo facepalmed and he exhaled loudly. “Hyung, listen to me. I know Kyuhyun-hyung. Me and Baekhyun are in the same singing club as him. And believe me, you don’t want him around. He’s good looking and all, but his attitude...” Kyungsoo stepped closer to Junmyeon and gave him an earnest look. “I don’t want you to be hurt, hyung. I know Yifan-hyung is the best for you.”
Yifan.
Junmyeon’s chest tightened at the name. He closed his eyes regretfully. “I know he is. I just... When I told him you guys were waiting for me, he said he would just join us and I... I didn’t want that... I mean, everyone seems a bit off whenever he’s around...”
“That’s because something is off about him,” Kyungsoo grumbled. He paused for a moment to give Junmyeon a stern look. “You know that it would be better if he joins us than the two of you alone. No matter how awkward it would be.”
Junmyeon nodded apologetically. “I’ll do that. I’m so sorry, Kyungsoo-yah.”
“And stop apologizing. It’s not your fault.”
“But...it’s because I told him it was okay to be friends...”
Kyungsoo waved a hand as if to tell him that it didn’t matter. “It was rude anyway to say no to that. Don’t worry.” The younger male yawned and shuffled to his bed. “It’s late. Let’s just go to sleep, hyung. I have a test tomorrow.”
Junmyeon obeyed and changed into something more comfortable before climbing up to his bed. He tried to close his eyes to sleep but it didn’t work. Junmyeon slowly cracked his eyes opened to see if Kyungsoo was still awake. He wasn’t sure because the other male had his back on him, but Junmyeon tried anyway. “Kyungsoo-yah?”
“Hm?”
“Did you know that...he had a close friend?”
Kyungsoo turned to face Junmyeon from his bed. “...no.”
Junmyeon adjusted his head on his pillow and pondered. “He told me that his friend went missing a few months ago. It was like Ryeowook had just vanished without a trace. Some said he ran away with his boyfriend because their parents didn’t approve of their relationship. They have been close friends since high school, so when Ryeowook was gone without saying a single thing to him, it...it hurt.”
Kyungsoo stayed silent. Junmyeon pulled the blanket to cover half of his body.
“I kinda feel it. I mean...it was probably what Chen felt too when I left him...”
Kyungsoo chose to not response to that. He reached to the nightstand to turn off the lamp.
“Goodnight, hyung.”
“...goodnight, Kyungsoo-yah.”
***
The following week was busy as hell.
They didn’t have the time to hang out anymore, at least not until mid tests were done.
Between their times of studying, Kris would give Junmyeon a call and Kyungsoo could hear the older male’s soft, cheerful voice from the other side of the room. He had a feeling Junmyeon didn’t tell his boyfriend about Kyuhyun, but it was okay, as long as nothing bad happened.
As long as Junmyeon was okay.
It was the last day of the mid-tests and they went back to the dorm pretty late. Both of them were exhausted that they didn’t bother to change. Kyungsoo was about to sleep with his full clothes on when he heard a knock on the door. Junmyeon gave him a tired look as if to say that he was too tired to move. Kyungsoo scowled in distaste as he pulled himself off of the bed and had to drag himself toward the door.
It was no other than Kyuhyun.
“Hi, Kyungsoo-yah,” Kyuhyun gave him a friendly smile which Kyungsoo ignored. “Is Junmyeon home?”
Kyungsoo’s expression turned sour and he was about to say no, when suddenly Junmyeon showed up behind him.
“Who is it-oh.”
Bad timing.
Kyungsoo found himself gritting his teeth in great dislike. He glared at Kyuhyun and stood defensively in front of Junmyeon. “We’re tired, hyung.”
“It's just a cup of coffee,” Kyuhyun shrugged. “It would help you to ease up after all those tests. What do you say? You can come along, Kyungsoo-yah.”
Kyungsoo was about to retort angrily when Junmyeon quickly spoke behind him.
“Kyungsoo’s right. I’m-we’re a bit tired. It’s been a really exhausting day.”
“It won’t take long, I promise.”
Kyungsoo wanted to just slam the door right to Kyuhyun’s obnoxious grin but managed to prevent himself from doing so. He threw a disapproving look to Junmyeon and the latter caught he meant. Kyungsoo didn’t want him to go and he got that.
“I’m really sorry, hyung,” Junmyeon said apologetically. “Maybe-maybe next time?”
Kyuhyun’s expression dimmed and he pursed his lips in disappointment. “I see. Next time it is, then.” He didn’t look happy as he gave both Kyungsoo and Junmyeon one last long look before leaving.
Kyungsoo didn’t bother to wait for Kyuhyun to disappear from his peripheral vision to slam the door shut. He locked the door somewhat indignantly and gave Junmyeon a serious stare.
“I really think you should tell your boyfriend about this.”
***
“Yifan?”
“Junmyeon-ah. Hey.”
“I’m-I’m sorry, did I wake you?”
“No...I’m not asleep yet. We’re having a sleepover at Minseok’s. It was supposed to be a group study but then it changed into...into this mess. Maybe I should just go home.”
“This...mess? Does that mean none of you are studying?”
“Yeah. I will never trust Minseok ever again when he say ‘let’s do a study group in my house’. But who would want to study when tomorrow is Saturday, right? I knew something was off. He just wanted to show us the new game he bought.”
A soft chuckle. “Right. ...please be careful on your way home.”
“I will.”
“...okay.”
“...Junmyeon-ah?”
“Hm?”
“Is everything alright?”
“...yeah.”
“Are you sure?”
“...y-yeah, the exams were tiring but... I think I would at least get B+. Or A, if I’m lucky enough.”
“I’m not talking about exams. How’s everything? How’s your friends?”
“They’re...they’re okay.”
“They’ve been nice to you?”
“Y-yeah.”
His resolve began to waver.
“Junmyeon-ah, are you alright? Has anyone bothered you?”
“I... I think I have to go, Yifan. I don’t want to wake Kyungsoo up. He’s exhausted and I don’t want to disturb his beauty sleep...”
“Oh. Okay then. Sweet dreams, babe.”
Silence.
“...Yifan?”
“Yeah?”
“...I miss you.”
It took Kris a long moment to finally reply.
“I miss you too, baby.”
***
Junmyeon had been avoiding Kyuhyun like he was some sort of plague.
It was subtle at first. Junmyeon didn’t want anyone to think that he was being rude to the older male but it had evolved into something obvious because Kyuhyun just wouldn’t stop pestering him. He ran out of reasons to decline his invitation. Junmyeon almost couldn’t take it anymore everytime Kyuhyun appeared. How could someone be this dense? Wasn’t he being clear enough that it was a no?
And one day it just happened.
Kyungsoo was getting ready for his afternoon class when all of a sudden, Junmyeon kicked the door open. He wanted to scowl in protest but then his eyes widened at the older male’s condition. Junmyeon was a mess and clearly he had been crying. “Hyung??”
Junmyeon didn’t reply as he threw everything onto the floor and went straight for the fruit knife by their dining table. He grabbed it fiercely and stretched out his free hand. His other hand trembled badly as he hovered the sharp thing above his wrist.
“Hyung, what the hell are you doing??” Kyungsoo shouted in fear as he realized what his roommate was about to do. He lunged forward to slap the knife away just in time and it flew out of their reach. The knife fell with a terrifying sound to the floor and Kyungsoo cringed. Junmyeon screamed and tried to reach for it again, but Kyungsoo hugged him tightly so that he wouldn’t be able to. “Hyung, stop!”
Junmyeon broke into tears as he slowly dropped to his knees. He became limp as he let Kyungsoo pulled himself into a tight embrace and sobbed. “Yifan...”
Kyungsoo let the older male cried in his arms, even though he himself hadn’t recovered from the fact that Junmyeon was trying to kill himself. He glanced at the knife worriedly, just in case Junmyeon was still planning to grab it but it was still out of their reach. He looked up when he heard a thud from the doorway and saw Baekhyun standing with his hand on the doorknob.
Baekhyun was expressionless.
“Baekhyun-hyung?”
“I saw what happened.”
Kyungsoo frowned and opened his mouth to ask more, but then Junmyeon moved slightly and he fixed his attention back to him. He widened his eyes when he saw a fresh kiss mark on Junmyeon’s collarbone and suddenly everything just fell into place. Kyungsoo scanned the pretty male’s face intently. His lips were a bit bruised-someone obviously had kissed him a bit too roughly.
After a few quiet moments-Baekhyun only stood there without a word-Junmyeon’s sob finally came to a stop. Kyungsoo waited patiently until the male drifted to a deep slumber and he slowly lifted him up to his bed with the help from Baekhyun. Junmyeon instinctively curled into a ball and mumbled his boyfriend’s name longingly.
“Yifan...”
Kyungsoo gritted his teeth in anger and looked at Baekhyun. “What happened, hyung?”
Baekhyun grimaced. “Told him that he played too hard to get.”
***
Junmyeon slowly grew back to his old self.
He was starting to close himself again, just like the first time he came to Seoul. Those beautiful smiles slowly, but surely, were peeled off of his face and Kyungsoo despised it. Even those precious phone calls couldn’t bring a sincere smile to Junmyeon’s pretty face anymore. Sure, Junmyeon would still smile into the phone like everything was alright, but it was Kyungsoo who witnessed his array of facial expressions. His smile didn’t even reach his eyes.
Junmyeon was lying to Kris.
Kyungsoo kind of understood what he felt. They were in a long distance relationship and surely Junmyeon just didn’t want Kris to be worried. But his condition was getting poorer each day and he refused to eat. Kyungsoo became genuinely worried and he wondered if Kris would be able to sense it through Junmyeon’s tone that his boyfriend wasn’t alright.
Baekhyun dropped by a lot to check on Junmyeon’s condition. Sometimes Chanyeol would follow behind him and he gave Kyungsoo a look as if to ask what happened, but none of them said anything. Kyungsoo wanted him to talk, but it didn’t seem like Junmyeon would be willing to. To think that he didn’t even tell the truth to his boyfriend.
Kyungsoo didn’t know when Junmyeon had started ignoring his phone.
It pained Kyungsoo to notice it, because all he ever wanted was just to see Junmyeon’s smile and it could only happen whenever Kris was calling. Junmyeon would steal a glance at his screen and the gleam in his eyes would diminish. He pushed the phone away under the pillow as it continued to vibrate. Whenever Junmyeon did pick up, he would apologize for being busy while Kyungsoo knew perfectly that he wasn’t. The pretty male also did his best to keep his voice indifferent because maybe, all he wanted to do was just to burst out crying and tell Kris everything.
But Junmyeon never did it.
Junmyeon was in the shower that night when his phone vibrated again. Kyungsoo fixed an inquisitive gaze at the screen and his heartbeat quickened.
Yifan was calling.
Kyungsoo glanced to the direction of the bathroom before looking away. He didn’t want to poke his nose into his friend’s affair. But something in him stubbornly argued that he needed to. Kris needed to know-it was his right for being Junmyeon’s boyfriend. Hell, Kyungsoo always told Jongin everything-even the most unimportant things. But what would Kris feel if he knew about Junmyeon’s condition from Kyungsoo? What if they get into a big fight?
However, at the third attempt of Kris’ call and the annoying vibrating sound of the phone, Kyungsoo found himself grabbing the phone. The sound of the water running in the bathrom indicated that Junmyeon was still inside. He swallowed nervously before picking up.
“Yifan-hyung? This is Kyungsoo.”
Kyungsoo’s eyes drifted to the bathroom door cautiously. The water was still running.
“How did you-“
His eyes widened. He held his breath as he listened to every word before nodding firmly.
“I understand. I will help, hyung.”
***
“Come join the party in the gymnastic building tonight,” Jongin read the flyer in his hand loudly and he almost snorted. “Yeah right, if by partying means getting high and one night stands.” The tanned skin male turned to his friends with a shrug. “I don’t know about you guys, but I could definitely use a free beer or two.”
“Sounds fun,” Chanyeol chirped happily. “Are we going, Baekhyunie?”
Baekhyun stared at him contemplatively. “The thought of us making out in such a crowd turns you on, right?”
Chanyeol grinned impishly as he patted Baekhyun’s head with such affection and the latter rolled his eyes. “My baby.”
“Alright, it’s settled then. We’re going,” Jongin stared at Junmyeon noncommittally. “What about you, hyung?”
“I...I guess I’ll go if it’s with you guys,” Junmyeon said hesitantly and looked around. “Where’s Kyungsoo?”
The others seemed to froze for a split of second at the question.
“He said he got something to do,” Jongin replied and shrugged for the umpteenth time that afternoon. “Since I’m going, Kyungsoo will definitely go. How about we pick you up at the dorm, hyung?”
***
Junmyeon regretted going as soon as they arrived.
He scanned the crowded place for Kyungsoo, but the male was still nowhere to be found. The place was hot and full of smoke and the music was deafening.
Jongin had disappeared the moment they arrived at the building, and Chanyeol and Baekhyun were lost in their heated make-out session beside him. Junmyeon forgot his regret for a while as he stared at the couple in amusement. The way their lips molded with each other was perfect and it grew something akin to jealousy in Junmyeon. He smiled bitterly to himself at the possibility that he would be able to do the same thing with Kris if he was ever around.
“Juice?”
Junmyeon was jolted out of his reverie and his every other thought vanished instantly. When he spotted Kyuhyun in front of him with a plastic glass, Junmyeon felt himself growing with fear and the only thing he could think about was Yifan.
Baekhyun broke his intimate kiss with Chanyeol and earned a protest from the taller of the two. He was still breathless from the kisses as he stared at Junmyeon and Kyuhyun beside them. Chanyeol automatically followed his boyfriend’s gaze.
“No, thank you,” Junmyeon said rather loudly because the music was blasting, it was starting to hurt his ears.
“I’m sorry, Junmyeon-ah,” Kyuhyun eagerly said as he leaned forward. “I’m sorry for everything.”
It was not exactly the brightest place to apologize but Junmyeon found himself nodding for the sake of Kyuhyun walking away from him. “It’s-it’s okay. Don’t worry about it-“
“What do you say if we get out of here to talk? It’s so damn loud!”
Junmyeon felt something warm on his hand and he turned to look at Baekhyun. The younger male shook his head subtly at him and Junmyeon understood what he meant. But Kyuhyun already yanked his wrist off of Baekhyun’s hand in a harsh way and Junmyeon winced.
“You’re not two anymore,” Kyuhyun growled. “You can decide anything without their help.”
“I’ll look for Jongin,” Chanyeol said quietly to his boyfriend as the taller of the two began to walk away for his friend. He disappeared into the dancing crowd within seconds.
“Let’s go,” Kyuhyun ordered darkly to Junmyeon. He was soon stopped by Baekhyun.
“You can’t force someone,” Baekhyun said as he shook his head.
“Oh yeah? Well you have no right to tell me what to do,” Kyuhyun said angrily and shoved Baekhyun aside. The other male let out a painful yelp as his back met the cold, flat wall.
“Wait!” Junmyeon exclaimed in panic. “O-okay, I’ll go with you, just don’t hurt anyone!”
“Hyung,” Baekhyun clutched his shoulder with a hiss. Clearly the male was hurt.
“It’s okay,” Junmyeon tried to calm him down even though his own lips were trembling badly. “Are you alright?”
“Let’s go,” Kyuhyun viciously dragged Junmyeon to exit the building. Junmyeon threw a worried look over his shoulder to Baekhyun once again before disappearing from the sight.
A slow smirk was tugging at Baekhyun’s lips as he licked his lips.
“Checkmate.”
***
Kyuhyun brought Junmyeon to his car. The male parked his car a bit far from the building so they weren’t easy to spot from the said place. There was almost no one in the parking lot-Junmyeon saw a few kids laughing and walking into the building-because everyone seemed to be partying inside. The weather was cold and Junmyeon found himself shivering. Kyuhyun smiled to him from inside the car and patted the empty spot beside him. “Come in.”
Junmyeon was sober enough to know that he didn’t want to. “Maybe-maybe I should go back-“
“Junmyeon, I’m so sorry.”
Junmyeon stiffened at his words. “For...for what?”
“For kissing you in front of my friends. I know that it was a bad thing to do and...”
“It’s-it’s okay,” Junmyeon said quickly even though he wasn’t sure if it was the right thing to say. “We-we make mistakes...”
“Gosh, what is this that I’m feeling? I can’t stop thinking about you...”
Junmyeon didn’t want to hear more. He turned around to walk away, but Kyuhyun managed to snatch his wrist and pulled him into the car. “No!”
“Oh, yes,” Kyuhyun chuckled darkly and quickly pinned Junmyeon beneath him. “You’re not going anywhere.”
Junmyeon gasped as he felt something wet pressing on his jaw. “H-hyung?”
“Ssh,” Kyuhyun whispered as he trailed his tongue along Junmyeon’s smooth chin. “It’s okay...”
“N-no,” Junmyeon had to close his eyes. “Please don’t hurt me, hyung. What are you doing to me?”
“Do you trust me?”
“Hyung, please stop-“
“Junmyeon-ah, it’s you who have to stop. Don’t you trust me?”
Junmyeon pushed Kyuhyun with all the strength he had and and became breathless like he had just run a few miles. “Please, Kyuhyun-hyung. Stop.”
“It’s okay, Junmyeon-ah, I’m not gonna hurt you-“
“Don’t touch me!” Junmyeon screamed as Kyuhyun lunged forward to catch his lips in a heated kiss. Their lips met halfway but Junmyeon broke the kiss and accidentally slapped Kyuhyun away. “Yifan, help!”
The slap made Kyuhyun stopped moving and he grunted in pain. Junmyeon squirmed under his grip and his face showed obvious fear. Kyuhyun slowly smirked as excitement waved over him. “That boyfriend of yours,” Kyuhyun snickered obnoxiously and wiped his mouth with the back of his arm. “Is he even real?”
Junmyeon stunned. “W-what?”
“You were playing so hard to get, Junmyeon-ah...by making up a nonexistent boyfriend. That’s quite a clever idea.”
“B-but-Yifan is-“
“It worked alright,” Kyuhyun purred as he started unbuttoning Junmyeon’s shirt. “It turned me on so bad and I wanted to have you.” His hand made its way to grasp Junmyeon’s crotch and the latter bit his bottom lip to not moan. He tried to swat Kyuhyun’s hands away but to no avail. Junmyeon gasped as Kyuhyun started stroking him down there. Instead of pleasure, Junmyeon felt painful. The way Kyuhyun wrapped his fingers around him was rough, unlike Kris.
Junmyeon’s tears were starting to form at the thought that a man other than Kris was touching him. He felt ashamed. Junmyeon let out a painful cry when Kyuhyun attacked his lips again, this time biting him rather harshly.
“Yifan-“, he breathed helplessly.
He wanted to die.
“Don't touch him.”
The sound of the window being smashed grinded everything to a halt and Kyuhyun abruptly pulled away. Junmyeon, who was still a bit dazed from everything could only watch weakly as the door to his right was opened and someone had detached Kyuhyun forcefully from him. The male let out a confused scream and a second later he went silent.
The deep voice from before rang a bell. Junmyeon’s vision was still blurred when he saw a blond haired male got into the car and pulled him into an embrace. He almost choked.
It couldn’t be.
“Are you alright?”
Junmyeon fluttered his eyes closed as he felt a great feeling of secure being in those arms. He leaned more into the touch and refused to open his eyes, as if he was afraid it was only a dream.
“Yi-Yifan...?”
“I’m here,” Kris whispered soothingly as he carried Junmyeon out of the car. “I’m here, Junmyeon-ah.”
***
“Please don’t hurt me!”
Junmyeon didn’t have a clue where they were. All he knew that he was safe in Kris’ arms and he saw Minseok angrily holding a baseball bat. Yixing and Zitao only stared at the bleeding male underneath them. Once his vision cleared, Junmyeon looked around frantically. The place was dark and the only lighting available was the natural light from the moon. They seemed to have brought Kyuhyun to a deserted warehouse, someplace far from the university.
“Yeah right,” Kris growled. “Just in case you didn’t notice, my boyfriend begged the same thing too when you tried to touch him.”
“I-I didn’t know-“
“If he has a boyfriend? I’m sure he has told you he’s seeing someone.”
“I-I didn’t know if he was serious-“
“No use talking to him ge. What are we going to do?” Minseok asked lazily. He looked dangerous with the bat in his hand.
Kris’ eyes darkened. “What he deserves.”
His boyfriend’s expression scared the hell out of Junmyeon. “Yi-Yifan, wait,” Junmyeon stammered. “I’m okay, I’m really okay. Please, just let him go.”
“No,” Kris said in mere disgust as he continued to stare at Kyuhyun. “He touched you a few times and you didn’t say anything to me.”
Junmyeon deadpanned in horror. “That’s-how did you-“
“What are you so scared about? Why didn’t you tell me? And you’ve been having thoughts about killing yourself, haven’t you? Those midnight calls-you were thinking, weren’t you?”
Junmyeon lowered his gaze in shame. “I...”
Kris would have attacked Junmyeon more with questions if someone hadn’t butted in.
“What is this?”
All of a sudden, Kyungsoo showed up out of nowhere. Junmyeon's jaw dropped at the sight before his eyes and wondered how did he manage to get to the place. A second later, Jongin appeared behind him and stepped into the room. Junmyeon didn’t understand. How did they get there? Both Kyungsoo and Jongin looked stunned at the sight of the bleeding Kyuhyun.
“Why haven’t you finished him yet?” Kyungsoo asked with a frown.
Junmyeon’s heart almost stopped beating at his question Kyungsoo-yah...?
“Waiting for order,” Minseok puffed his cheeks in annoyance. "By the way, nice place, Kyungsoo-yah. Glad to have you on our side."
“K-Kyungsoo-yah,” Junmyeon stuttered in confusion. He almost didn’t get what was going on. Everyone seemed angry-even Jongin, who had said nothing ever since he stepped in-and it was obvious that they wanted Kyuhyun to be hurt. But the good side in Junmyeon still told him that it was all wrong. “Please...tell them that Kyuhyun-hyung did nothing to me. He was just drunk. He didn’t mean to. He didn’t mean anything.”
Kyungsoo stared at Junmyeon with an unreadable expression. Junmyeon almost shuddered because even Kyungsoo was starting to scare him. The latter pursed his lips in a contemplative way before shaking his head slowly. “No. He’s evil. He deserves it.”
Junmyeon froze. “What...?”
“He’s evil, hyung.”
“B-but-Kyungsoo-yah“, Junmyeon cried in disbelief and turned to his boyfriend. “Yifan, please-“
“Hey,” Minseok suddenly said to Kyuhyun. “I heard you lost your best friend.”
Kyuhyun wiped the blood away with the back of his hand as he frowned. His tone was calm but his expression showed that he was conflicted. “You mean...Ryeowook? I didn’t lose him. He ran away to be with his boyfriend.”
Zitao snorted in response and Yixing erupted into fits of laughter.
Minseok rolled his eyes. “Are you stupid or what? Do you really believe that? Has he ever tried contacting you ever since he ran away? He’s like what-your partner in crime? You guys have been really close and all of a sudden he just disappeared from your life?”
Zitao muttered something along the line of ‘stupid’.
“What are you suggesting?” Kyuhyun screamed in frustration.
“We knew it was you,” Minseok snarled in such a scary way that Junmyeon had to look away. He reached out for Kris’ hand and intertwined their fingers together. “We knew it was you and Ryeowook who went for a drive in our hometown and killed someone.”
Kyuhyun went pale and he had a hard time swallowing. “...what?”
“You killed a mother of two. The family broke down after her death while you escaped back here, continued living your perfect life,” Minseok added obscenely. He threw a sympathetic look to Junmyeon and pointed a finger at him. “And the person that you want to fuck so much, is one of her sons.”
Kyuhyun blanched.
The whole room was consumed by suffocating silence. None of them seemed to be brave enough to fracture it.
Junmyeon’s jaw dropped as anger was starting to build in him. All the doubts he had were gone. Suddenly, he wasn’t sure which one was right and which one wasn’t. But to have Kyuhyun there, bleeding, trembling in fear, the cause of everything-he caused his family to crumble and go separate ways while he lived in his perfection... It was so fucking nauseating and yet so right at the same time. Junmyeon let go of Kris’ hand and placed it over his mouth. He was shaking in anger.
“Junmyeon-“, Kyuhyun said desperately as he shook his head. “Junmyeon-I swear, it was a mistake, we were drunk, we didn’t see her, we didn’t-“
“You escaped,” Junmyeon said in a saccharine voice. “You escaped after you hit her.”
“I swear I didn’t do it on purpose-Ryeowook was-Ryeowook-“
“It was you who drove the damn car,” Minseok hissed. The room was filled with the clattering sound of the baseball bat against the floor. “Stop blaming everything on your dead friend and man up to admit your mistakes!”
“Junmyeon-ah, help me! I swear to God I-wait...”, Kyuhyun held his breath as he looked up to Minseok. “Did you just say...dead...friend?”
“Oh,” Minseok broke into an evil grin and behind him, Yixing couldn’t stop laughing. “I forgot to ask you the big question. Come on, as a friend...you can’t be that naive, Kyuhyun. Have you ever wondered what happened to your little Ryeowook?”
“Just finish him already,” Zitao scowled vehemently “Ge, one word from you and I’ll break his neck with a single kick.”
Kyungsoo moved closer to Jongin for protection. He had a feeling he was about to witness something terrible.
“Close your eyes,” Kris demanded to Junmyeon and his boyfriend obediently did as he was told. The blond male pulled the latter closer to his chest. “It will be over soon. Just close your eyes.”
“You didn’t,” Kyuhyun shook his head in fear. He tried to crawl away from Minseok who was starting to swing the baseball bat, but stopped because Yixing and Zitao were moving from their spots to prevent him from running. “Please, I beg you, please-“
Minseok squinted his eyes as he aimed for the obvious spot with the bat in his hands: Kyuhyun’s head.
“Oh, we did,” Minseok’s grin widened. “We just pushed him into the moving train.”
***
Junmyeon pretended he didn’t hear Kyuhyun’s painful scream and the sound of a head being smashed by a baseball bat numerous times. It was sickening, but in Kris’ arms, Junmyeon felt like he was safe because he knew his boyfriend would never do anything harmful to him.
He didn’t say anything when Minseok and Yixing dragged the lifeless body out of the warehouse, saying something like they were going to dump the body far far away and Kyungsoo gave in to help. He didn’t say anything when Zitao said he would stay behind to clean up the mess. He also didn’t say anything when Kris put him gingerly on his bed, back at his dorm, telling him to rest and Junmyeon immediately hugged his body. His hands wouldn’t stop trembling.
It stopped only when Kris lie beside him and cupped his chin gently. The male pressed a soft kiss against his lips and Junmyeon let out a shaky moan. It was like the kiss had been the greatest remedy because he gradually stopped shaking. Junmyeon slowly kissed back because all he could think about at the moment was his boyfriend and how much he had missed him.
“Go to sleep, Junmyeon-ah.”
Junmyeon seek warmth from Kris’ lips once again before sighing. “Yifan...?”
“Hm?” Kris hummed.
“Do you...do you love me...?”
Kris paused for a moment. “More than anything.”
Junmyeon curled his fingers into Kris’ tightly. He felt terribly scared and confused. “Don’t ever let me go, then...”
“I’m not intending to.”
“Please stay, Yifan...”
Kris stayed quiet. The room was a bit cold, but the closeness of their bodies made it warm. Junmyeon kept on shutting his eyes closed because he was scared to look at Kris, he didn’t want him to go away. His heart was starting to beat so fast like it was trying to leap out of his chest. The beat was banging loudly in his ears and he wondered if Kris was able to hear his uneasiness.
“Yifan...?” He whispered even though he knew the male was still there, holding his hands. He just wanted to make sure How did Kyungsoo get into all of this?
Kris shifted his body for a more comfortable position to hold Junmyeon, still holding him close to his chest. “Junmyeon-ah.”
Junmyeon hummed tiredly in response.
“There’s something you need to know.”
The pretty male cracked his eyes opened, but still didn’t have the courage to look at his boyfriend. He stayed still, eyes drilling holes on Kris’ shirt. Something in Kris’ tone told him that it was going to be something awful.
“I’ve been lying to you.”
Junmyeon’s throat became dry What have you been lying about?
“I will stay,” Kris said sternly. “But only because you want me to.”
What are you saying? Of course I want you to...
Kris buried his nose on Junmyeon’s silky hair and tightened his embrace. “This is not the right time. We can talk about this tomorrow. Right now, I want you to just sleep.”
Junmyeon was too drained to reply. He could only sob weakly in response. He didn’t know what to say, everything was just too much for him to digest at the moment. He couldn’t say anything but to pull Kris closer and whispered, “I love you, Yifan. I love you...”
Kris took a long pause before replying.
“I love you more, Junmyeon-ah.”
***
Kyungsoo didn’t go back to their dorm the next day.
Junmyeon wondered if the male stayed over at Jongin’s place to give him some private time with Kris.
By the time he woke up, he was in the car, feeling a bit dizzy from all the long trip. Junmyeon had lost track of time how long they had been in the street. They were taking quite a trip with the rental car and Junmyeon could only see trees as far as they went. The pretty male rubbed his eyes sleepily and straightened up in his seat.
“Hey,” Kris gently caressed his cheek with a thumb. “You’re awake.”
“Hm,” Junmyeon blinked rapidly. “Where are we going?”
“Someplace.”
“Where are you taking me, Yifan?”
“We’re almost there.”
“But where?” Junmyeon almost cried in frustration. “Yifan, you scared me...please tell me what’s going on.”
“Just a little bit more...bear with it for a while.”
It was almost dark when they finally stopped in a secluded area. It was quite far from the town and Junmyeon found himself biting his lip in worry. They were stopping by a bridge. Kris turned off the engine and got off of the car first before walking to the passenger’s side to open the door for him. Junmyeon couldn’t tear himself away from Kris’ iron grip and let himself be dragged out. His strength was nothing compared to the blond male.
The pretty male was soon pinned onto the barrier. Junmyeon glanced over his shoulder and gulped in fear. The sea looked deep underneath them.
“Yifan...?”
Kris softly molded their lips together and Junmyeon fluttered his eyes closed. The kiss was achingly tender and sweet. Junmyeon ignored the way his skin prickled at the contact. It reminded him of Kyuhyun’s rough lips on him and he gasped almost hysterically, but the way Kris swept his bang from his forehead let him know that it was his boyfriend who was kissing him and no other. Slowly, Junmyeon went back to being himself and intentionally kissed back.
The taller male was the one who pulled away first but he never broke their eye contact.
The silence rang painfully in Junmyeon’s ears as he pulled Kris closer for another kiss.
Kris gave in before exhaling slowly through his nose.
“The plan,” he slowly spoke. “Was to get Kyuhyun.”
Junmyeon grabbed a fistful hand of Kris’ shirt. “Huh...?”
“It’s a revenge,” Kris continued. “A revenge...for you and Chen.”
“A revenge...?”
Kris pursed his lips grimly. “We planned this. Everyone. Including Chen, himself.”
A disbelief look was chiseled onto Junmyeon’s face and the male started pulling away from Kris. “You-you knew? All along, you knew? Including Minseok, Yixing and everyone? And-and you lied to me?”
“Junmyeon, please.”
“Wh-what else did you lie to me about?” Junmyeon tried to push Kris away but the taller male was too stubborn to let him go. His breath became ragged. “Did you lie about...us, too?”
Kris had never looked so determined before. “If there was one thing that I didn’t lie to you, it was my feelings. I love you, Junmyeon, I love you so much that I’m willing to do these kind of things.”
Junmyeon let Kris gently caressed his cheeks and couldn’t help but loving everything the taller male did to him. “What are you trying to say, Yifan...?”
“You asked me to stay and I answered I would, if it was what you really wished for.”
Junmyeon was about to say something but soon closed his mouth again. He held his breath as he realized a car pulled over near their car, followed by another car. “Yifan-“
“Junmyeon, you can’t run away forever. You’ve been avoiding things too long. You need to face your fear.”
Minseok was the first to get out of the car. He was soon followed by the others.
“Yifan, I’m scared-what are you going to-“
Kris shifted his body to block Junmyeon’s eyesight from his friends. “Please give me a chance, Junmyeon-ah. If you want me to disappear after this, I will. You can just forget everything that happens between us.” Kris took a deep breath. “But...if you ever, ever still want me to stay... You need to get ready because I’m talking about a lifetime commitment.”
With that, Kris slowly took a step back.
Kris’ warmth was soon replaced by cool air and Junmyeon encouraged himself to shift his gaze to the others.
Everyone was there-including Kyungsoo and Jongin. The second car hadn’t turned off its engine and the window in the passenger’s seat suddenly was rolled down and Baekhyun peeked with a grin. Junmyeon instinctively smiled back even though he couldn’t think. All of them were smiling. Their smile were calming and Junmyeon almost couldn’t take it anymore. He didn’t have a clue what was going on.
“Please...just tell me the truth,” Junmyeon pleaded.
No one said anything but then a figure appeared behind Minseok.
Junmyeon’s heartbeat increased dramatically at the familiar figure. His hand flew to cover his mouth and he started trembling again. He threw a judging gaze to Kris, but within a second the taller of the two knew that it was not anger. It was also not hate. Junmyeon was simply relieved underneath the confusion.
“Chen...?”
Jongdae smiled brightly.
“Hello, hyung.”
End.
WHAT IS THIS THAT I’M WRITING HELP