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[fleeceblankie]

I'm exhausted, really. But I want to get this out.

I'm actually a little afraid to write this, because... Well, I think you guys will see.

Comments

[minxyminou]

I think the whole trendy bisexuality thing has done a LOT of damage for people who are genuinely bisexual or bicurious.

[blueskydei]

I agree with this.

[fleeceblankie]

Ugh, absolutely. To the point that I had to wonder if that's what I was doing. That's just sad.

[ickletarakins]

^this^

It is unfortunate, but there are a lot of people who decide to be bisexual because it's the "in" thing to do. I've known girls who claim to be bisexual simply because they think guys will find it hot/interesting.

I also agree with your comment about "loving who you love". I fell in love with a girl friend of mine years ago. She was beautiful, smart, and an amazing, talented person. We were friends for a while, had a fling that lasted about 4 or 5 months, and remain friends to this day. In the end, we simply weren't relationship-compatible. But I will always love her, and if something happened to Steve and another woman like her came into my life, I wouldn't dismiss the opportunity.

[polymale]

*hugs*

Don't worry about the labels.. don't worry about what people think.. do what you think might make you happy, experiment. Once you have some, you'll know what's right for you and what isn't.. it will all fall into place.

[fleeceblankie]

I think I just need to time to grow into my declaration, y'know? I think maybe once I say it out loud, something will click and I won't be so worried. Is that weird? haha.

[polymale]

Hey, that makes sense to me :)

[fleeceblankie]

Hopefully you'll have a few close friends you can talk to that understand and/or are supportive.

I'm kind of frustrated with my friends right now, and I'm wondering exactly how I'm supposed to say this after how long it's been since we've really talked, y'know? That's why I ended up writing it here first. But...we'll see.

If you're honest and just be you - then you have no control over how people are going to view you, so you might as well just do what you want, ya know?

Normally I'm the first person to believe this. And I'm an admitted shit-stirrer, and I like it when people are appalled, so I don't know what my problem is... bleh.

[sonadora9]

I feel dumb for saying this ... but I don't think I know what pansexuality is.

Aside from that, I think it speaks a lot for how strong your character is to be honest with yourself about this, and with others. People talk about how hard it is to come out if you're gay or bi, but I usually think it's even worse for those who just aren't sure. If you identify for sure any one way, you've got a community you could turn to. But if you're "questioning" ... I know that's included in the pretty much all-encompassing LGBTQ-etc. acronym, but ... I've never really known anyone who said they were "questioning." It feels like it's mostly left unspoken for, from my perspective. Seems like it would be awfully hard, and lonely, to find yourself in that group ....

Heather, you're awesome.

[fleeceblankie]

From Wikipedia: "Pansexuality is a sexual orientation characterized by the potential for aesthetic attraction, romantic love, or sexual desire for people, regardless of their gender identity or biological sex. Some pansexuals suggest that they are gender-blind; that gender and sex are insignificant or irrelevant in determining whether they will be sexually attracted to others."

I'm probably closer to that than anything.

You're completely right. "Questioning" is technically in there, but 99% of the people I meet in the LGBTQ community are pretty damn sure of what they are. Seems like "questioning" is supposed to be reserved for teenagers who get aroused by a stiff breeze during puberty and think they've got a crush on their best friend. Sigh.

Marcy, you're awesome, too. Thank you. :)

[funnyfreckles8]

I don't like labels either. They make me feel like I need to meet certain criteria to stay within the label limits. I have been heterosexual for the first 28 years of my life and I just wasn't getting what I needed emotionally.

I have since met a beautiful woman and we have been together for just over a year now. It was a huge shock for my family and friends but they soon realized that I was in no way embarrassed about my decision but rather that I'd finally found the missing piece. They were all extremely supportive and all commented that they were just happy that I was finally happy and that they could see it.

I wouldn't be surprised if your family and friends thought the same thing. Try and give people the benefit of the doubt 'cause sometimes they will surprise you.

[fleeceblankie]

Aw, that's awesome. :)

Oddly enough, I'm not worried about my mother. She's been asking me for years if I'm gay, so I think, if I said there might be a chance I was into girls, she'd probably tell me "I told you so," LOL. And my friends, since most of them are queer or queer-friendly...they'll be cool. It's, y'know...the rest of the world. The casual acquaintances that would still never resist the chance to give me a hard time. But then again...they're casual for a reason.