"Tired and frustrated that you scrolled all the way down here just to grade a stupid assignment? At least you know that you're getting paid to click _here_ to go back to the top of my crappy and rather hard to read page."

--One of my students; read while I was grading late in the evening.

It's not that I don't like Christmas, I just don't like everything that leads up to Christmas and occurs at Christmas. Tragedies become more tragical. An orphanage explodes -- that's sad. An orphanage explodes at Christmas -- that's real sad. Christmas makes things sadder and strengthens the cheap plastic crap industry. It's supposed to be about ( Read more... )

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rilkesdream: Two antennas met on a roof
CharlesPRobinson: Auto-reply: I am Jack's colon. I get cancer, I kill Jack.
rilkesdream: they fell in love
rilkesdream: and got married
rilkesdream: the ceremony was lame
rilkesdream: but the reception was great!

Not all beach balls are good, however, an example is an evil brown beach ball that's attached to a metal arm that sends through the victim evil energy that rapes the soul while pressing upon them, simultaneously emitting an evil "vvvvvvv" sound while causing the victim's vision to black out completely.

Why is my tongue purple?
Is this normal?

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I haven't posted in a while, because there's not really been anything worth laughing at lately. But in all truth, not I nor anyone else can deny that this is FUCKING hilarious.
It might not be authentic, but I can only hope.

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