Title: A River by Any Other Name Would Play a Different Song
Author:
firefly124Fandom: Doctor Who
Prompter:
silvia_elisaPrompt: Jack raising River. Baptised with a perfect name.
Rating/warning: G, kidfic
Word Count: 580
Summary: Jack should’ve known she was going to be a handful.
A/N: Written for the
spoiler_song One Night of Writing. Huge thanks to
alt_universe_me,
elfwreck/
elf, and
queenortart for lightning beta-reading and Brit-picking! Also thanks to
huskyfriends for the bizarre chat that led to part of River's heritage. Happy New Year, all!
~*~
It probably should have clued him in, the way she studied everything around her so intently from the moment she was born. Or the way she devoured all his stories, especially the one about her brilliant redheaded great-great-great-grandmother who saved the universe but could never know it. Or the way she never questioned that her father could have known this woman some thirty centuries ago. He’d hoped she assumed they were fairy tales, not that he’d give her nightmares with those horrors, but more likely she’d been taking notes.
Actually, the first hint should simply have been that she had his DNA, because, really, that was the first warning sign in all his offspring, and he’d had a few occasions to pick up on that fact.
So it shouldn’t have surprised him when she arrived home from her first day at school with a message from her teacher that had a security lock fit for highly classified interplanetary diplomatic documents. Fortunately, even if he hadn’t had the access codes, it would’ve been merely a challenging evening’s puzzle to break it. Clearly, River thought so too, as she had obviously tried.
“Are you going to tell me what this says before I have to read it for myself?” he asked.
“I can’t. I haven’t seen it, Dad,” she replied with a cheeky grin that made his stomach sink.
Oh yeah, she was Daddy’s little girl.
Once he’d read it, Jack had all he could do not to laugh. That really wasn’t the right response. Plenty of co-parents had explained that to him in excruciating detail over the years. Often at substantial volume. Jack liked to think he was capable of learning from past mistakes. Eventually.
“Why did you decide to run the Delta Scam on your classmates?” he finally asked with what he hoped was an appropriate level of gravity.
“Wasn’t really the Delta Scam,” River pointed out. “Exactly.”
Jack shot her a glare to let her know that was not at all the point. Apparently it worked.
“You always say it’s important to ‘valuate new places and people right away,” she said. “Now I know who to look out for.”
“The ones who shopped you?” he hazarded.
“No!” For a six year old, she managed to look as though he’d said something unbearably stupid. “The ones who tried to buy into it, silly. ‘Can’t cheat an honest man.’”
Jack wondered how badly his partners would maim him if he told her she had a point. Rather than find out, he asked, “Where’s the money?”
“Obviously they didn’t need it if they were going to just give it to me,” she said, “so I put it in the poor box for the ones who don’t have any.”
Sod proper parenting. Jack swept her up into his arms and hugged her tight, pressing a kiss to the top of her curly mop of hair before setting her back down.
“You know we’re going to have to come up with a proper punishment when your Mums and Tad get home,” he said, trying to recapture a modicum of sternness.
She nodded with a solemness belied by the twinkle in her eyes. “And I’ll ‘pologize.”
As she turned to leave, it finally occurred to Jack to ask, “What made you choose that one?”
“The name, silly,” she replied with a grin before skipping out to the garden to play until dinner.
He really had to start being more careful what he named his kids.