Fic: Taken For Granted | Narcissa Malfoy/Andromeda Tonks | PG-13

[fiery_flamingo]

Title: Taken For Granted
Characters: Narcissa Malfoy/Andromeda Tonks
Words:  ~300
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: incest
Author's Note: Written for forsanethaec over at deatheatercest' Drabblethon. The prompt was "I don't know how to be something you miss; I never thought we'd have a last kiss." and hopefully this isn't the hot mess I think it may be. I'm playing with a choppier

Comments

[thepretender501]

Wow! That was wow! This: “Wake up, flower child,” Andromeda whispered in her ear in the summer of '69, her lips brushing against Narcissa's neck as she spoke, not caring if her sister caught the Muggle pun. Narcissa groggily shied away from the touch, too hot for human contact.

And This:
“You can kiss me at Christmas, when it's cold,” she grumbled and rolled onto a cooler patch of bedding.

And the ending destroyed me. I'm seriously choking up for Narcissa. I want to keep reading it over and over. The way you wrote this made me feel like I was there. That was subtle and so beautiful please oh please don't turn me into a huge femmeslash fan *g*. Thank you for writing this!

[fiery_flamingo]

:D Thanks so much! I'm glad you enjoyed it.

And never fear, this is only my second femmeslash piece ever you're probably safe. XD

[forsanethaec]

Oh my god, I love all of it! Just beautifully written, seriously. The first paragraph and the Christmas line were fantastic. Wow!! Thanks so much for writing this sad, lovely gorgeousness for my little old prompt. I'm just rereading over and over. Wonderful writing.

[fiery_flamingo]

Oh yay! Thank you!

I'm glad I didn't botch your prompt since I really liked it (Taylor Swift lyrics or no xD). I hardly write slash of any sort ever so I get nervous about doing it wrong. *snerk*

[elle_blessing]

THIS WAS FANTASTIC.

I love the "choppier" style. You told a story of half a lifetime in 300 words and it was lovely and powerful. *flails*

I agree with thepretender501 - the ending killed me. You're so good at making me feel what your characters are feeling. I really felt Narcissa's quiet anguish at the end.

*happy sigh*

[fiery_flamingo]

Oh good, I'm so glad this doesn't just suck. >.< You know I like to experiment and then worry and nitpick and just generally be too concerned with whether or not a sentence sounds better with 'that' in it or without.

I have issues.

Anyway, I think of this style as the anti-pinksheep/wench style. We're a verbose lot so here I'm trying to see how many ideas I can convey per word. More bang for my buck, you could say.

You're so good at making me feel what your characters are feeling

Again, I'm glad you think so since it's another major concern of mine. Am I emoting? Do my character's actions make any sense compared to her motivations?

Dood, I am so in my own head. I'm just going to shut up. xD

...Wait, you read femmeslash? For me? YOU DO LOVE ME! xD

[elle_blessing]

I don't think I've ever read anything by you that sucked :P (because yes, you nitpick your writing all to hell and back)

I love you anyway. (SEE. I DIDN'T SAY 'ANYWAYS'. You've broken me of writing or speaking it XD)

I like the more bang for your buck style. I need lessons. Srsly and stat.

Yeah, I always feel your writing. ALWAYS. I want to emote like you. Trufax.

[leigh_adams]

Oh. My. Gosh.

Sam, this was beautiful. Seriously, you conveyed everything into so few words. I mean, this was amazing. Like, I don't even like femmeslash, and I'm in awe of how great this was.

Bravo, sweets. Bravo. :*

[fiery_flamingo]

I love replying to comments a over a month later. -_-

Thank you for reading my femmeslash, mi corazon. ♥ I'm glad that you liked it in spite of the icky girl on girl action ;D

[dexstarr]

You must write more femmeslash!

You packed quite a punch into 300 words and really told a story. My favorite part was: “Wake up, flower child,” Andromeda whispered in her ear in the summer of '69, her lips brushing against Narcissa's neck as she spoke, not caring if her sister caught the Muggle pun. I had that image in my head when I saw the prompt, and you wrote it so beautifully.

Lovely drabble.

[fiery_flamingo]

*blushes* Aw, shucks, thanks. :D I'm glad you enjoyed it. It was great to try something new.

Sorry my reply is delayed. -_- Not quite a month later but close so close.

(Also, hai, new friend!)

[dexstarr]

*shrug* I'll forgive you, if you write more femmeslash? : lol

Hai new friend!

[fiery_flamingo]

lol, mebbe. It's more about the prompt than the pairing for me a lot of times.

Though I did eye femmefest earlier but I need to finish my deatheaterfest Parvati/Macnair thing first. *eyes it* And exchange fests give me an ulcer. 'What if this isn't what they wanted????' Commence freak out.

/ramble xD