National Coming Out Day.

[fickle_goddess]

I'm asexual.

Flat, simple statement that often gets a lot of debate. From my friends, it tends to be the well-meaning assumption that I just haven't really grown-up yet and that I'll get interested in sex later. Or that I'm dismissing sex as something I'm not interested in because I haven't tried it yet

Comments

[xindanobodie]

I, for one, have always LOVED your term "lickable". It's one that many use, I'm sure, but I didn't hear it as often until you would say it. And the term assexual was fairly new to me and then suddenly I meet about a handful of people - who almost all at once - state to be asexual. I suppose that's one reason why I find it kinda... hard to find people dismissing it - regardless of the obviousness of it and others being dismissed.

Yeah, that is true - looking sexy and being sexual are often merged... even when it's can clearly be one or the other... etc etc

Okay, I'm sorry, but I snickered at people raving to you about orgasms xD I don't know... it just comes off strange to me ^^;;

"I am what I am." Hm. Icon necessary.

[fickle_goddess]

Awwww. I had someone ask me about how I can be asexual and still find people lickable, so that's one of the reasons that I clarified it here. And maybe we're finally coming out of the woodwork! Or we inspire each other to be brave. One or the other.

Being sexy doesn't mean you want sex. Thinking like that is where the fallacy 'but she was asking for it' or 'she shouldn't dress like that unless she wants to get raped' comes from.

*snickers* Yeah. It's weird. I think their assumption is that if I hear enough about it, I'll go out and have one, just like if you pimp a TV show to me, I'll watch it. Or so they think!

Icon right back at you!

[xindanobodie]

xD Makes sense to me, really. *nods* That could be it, too. Having the knowledge of knowing you're not alone or that someone won't bash-flame-insult-etcetc what you have to say... is helpful...

*nods* Yup. So true.

LOL! XDDDD That's... a funny AND scary thought XDDD "Pimp my orgasm!" (Heard of "Pimp My Ride"?)

<3

[lunarwhirl]

Good for you! ♥

[fickle_goddess]

I have no idea if anyone actually comes out on National Coming Out Day, and pretty much everyone on my flist knows I'm asexual anyway, but I figured this would be as good a time as any to put up a post about what being asexual means to me. XD

[yukirien]

In the true Wellesley fashion:

I suppose that it doesn't really matter, in the end. I am what I am.

And what I am just happens to be asexual. I can live with that.

Word.

[fickle_goddess]

...What's the Wellesley fashion? XD But thanks for the 'Word'. This was inspired by seeing you had a post up about NCOD.

[yukirien]

The "word" is the Wellesley fashion (which I meant in the sense that my response is in the Wellesley fashion. I just realized that's a bit ambiguous). Usually snaps if in person, "word" if on a forum.

[yukirien]

And lots of posts inspiring other posts today. :)

[pinkspider]

I can't praise you enough for having the nerve to post this publicly. I understand every word you've said here. And I can tell you it doesn't get any better as you get older. You think people find it impossible to believe when you are 21... wait until you get to be over 30.

It's not that I'm cold. I'm a very physically affectionate person. Maybe I could feel physically drawn to someone who I love in that way, devote my life to, spend the rest of my life with, a true soulmate, etc. But it would be that special partner motivating me to become more physical, not the need for physicality motivating me to find a partner. It would definitely have to be someone with whom I have merged intellectually/emotionally/spiritually first. And so far, life hasn't gifted me with that person.

Do you have people implying that there's something wrong with you, that your lack of sex drive must be the result of some trauma or suggest counseling or some other crap? That's what infuriates me more than the ones who just don't believe it. There's something