"Star Trek: Generations Gaps"
Title: Star Trek: Generations Gaps
Author: Fair Hearing
Pairings: Er, a lot. But most relevant to interests, the STXI Holy Trinity of Kirk/McCoy, Spock/Uhura, and Chekov/Sulu.
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Crossover with TNG, language, womanizing, continual crack.
Kink request: "AOS Enterprise gets caught in a time loop until the Enterprise-D finds them. A whole alternate timeline getting mashed into theirs 1. gives everyone a headache and 2. puts both crews in proximity while young and virile."
Notes: WELL, I THOUGHT IT WAS FUNNY, ANYWAY.
"Judging from the evidence collected around the ship, I theorize we may be caught in a temporal causality loop," said Spock.
"See, I knew he was going to say that, Jim," said McCoy.
"As I knew you would say that, Doctor."
"Well," said Kirk, deep in thought, "what c-"
"Caused it? Likely, an explosion that..."
"...'created a tear in space-time,'" Sulu said, without even looking up.
"Indeed. We --"
"...'collided, exploded, then were sent back to the beginning of the loop'," said Uhura, one finger up like she was reciting a poem, "'there to replay the'..."
"...'entire scenario from the wery beginning, ad nauseum.'"
"Thank you, Ensign. As you can doubtless tell, Captain, we must have repeated this cycle many times -- perhaps for months, even years, judging by how well the crew has memorized my explanation."
"Hmm." Kirk looked unconvinced.
"Have you not been experiencing what humans call 'déjà vu'?"
Kirk grinned. "Didn't you just --"
"Ask me that?" the entire bridge crew grumbled in unison.
Kirk looked crestfallen.
Just then the red alert proximity klaxons started to wail.
"Captain!" shouted Chekov. "I'm picking up a huge spacial distortion, five thousand kilometers off the port bow!"
"Full reverse, Mr. Sulu," said Kirk, gripping the arms of his chair.
"The helm's not responding, Captain!"
"Impact imminent! In three, two, one --"
Chekov's voice would be the last thing any of them ever heard.
Until the lights came back on.
The engines thrummed to life again around a bridge crew that was frozen in various states of last-second panic.
"Uh," mumbled Kirk after a second, both his hands still raised. "Status?"
"All systems online, sir," said Sulu, cautiously raising his head.
"All decks reporting in, no casualties," said Spock.
"The distortion is, ah, gone, sir," said Chekov. His voice kept switching octaves. "It seems we were knocked away from impact by... some kind of tractor beam."
"Whose?"
"I'm not sure, I --"
"Captain, sensors are picking up a vessel off the port bow. Signature is... Starfleet..." Spock looked uncharacteristically confused as he stared at his monitor.
"Hail them," said Kirk, exactly at the same time Uhura said "They're hailing us."
"Um. Open a channel," said Kirk, standing.
"This is Captain James T. Kirk of the Federation st--" he began, before the sight of a Klingon in some kind of Federation uniform made him stop in mid-sentence.
The other captain had started talking at the same time as Kirk. "... Picard of the Federation starship Enterprise..."
The other captain stopped.
"Did you say, 'Kirk'?"
"Did you say 'Enterprise'?"
Spock and the gold-skinned ops officer on the other ship remarked on this development at exactly the same time.
"Intriguing."
STAR TREK
GENERATIONS GAPS
Starring
Commanding Officers Captain James T. Kirk and Captain Jean-Luc Picard
Chief Science Officers Spock and Data OTP
Chief Medical Officers Leonard McCoy and Beverly Howard Crusher
Chief Engineers Montgomery Scott and Geordi La Forge
Chief Gettin'-Some Officers William Thomas Riker and James T. Kirk
Chief Communications Officers Nyota Uhura and... the Computer
Kickass Pilots Hikaru Sulu and Ro Laren OTP
Excitable Ensigns Pavel Andreivich Chekov and Wesley Crusher
Lonely Klingon Worf Rozhenko, son of Mogh
Chief Eye-Candy Officers Deanna Troi and James T. Kirk
[Commercial Sign]
DAY ONE
NCC-1701-D CONFERENCE ROOM
1800 HOURS
"...so you see, Captains, the original Enterprise has not only inadvertently traveled through time, it has also shifted to the universe its officers refer to as 'Universe Prime.'"
"Like a derailed train," said Uhura. She had to hold her elbows in to fit in the extremely crowded conference room.
"Precisely, Lieutenant Uhura," Data replied, nodding at her.
"Wait a second," said Kirk, from one end of the table. "How do we know we're in a parallel universe?"
"Yes, couldn't this be an entirely new reality, Mr. Data?" said Picard from the other end.
Data quirked his head.
"A possibility we could recognize except for one fact, Captain," said Spock, switching to a new slide. "Vulcan is quite whole in this universe, while Romulus and my counterpart are both nowhere to be found."
"Like a disappearing magician," Troi mused.
"Exactly, Counselor."
"Wait, I thought that whole Romulus thing happens in the future," McCoy grumbled. "Your guys' future, I mean. After the Enterprise-E and everything."
Spock quirked his head.
"An excellent point, Doctor," Data said, switching to a new slide. "However, the effect of the Enterprise Prime's century-long sojourn in the fabric of spacetime has caused some events connected with its inhabitants to occur sooner than they should."
"Like a video on fast-forward," Sulu said thoughtfully.
"Just so, Lieutenant."
"So what exactly are we supposed to do about it?" Worf asked grumpily, sticking his head inside the room. He was sitting crosslegged outside the door at the older crew's request.
Data quirked his head.
"Mr. Data and I have been working with Engineers Scott and La Forge on this very question, Mr. Worf," said Spock, switching to a new slide.
"We think if we can reverse the polarity of the Enterprise-D's saucer shields," Geordi spoke up, gesticulating as he paced in an extremely small circle, "we can generate a static warp bubble that could travel through both time and space without hurting anyone inside it."
"Just add a wee bit o' dilithium juice, and whammo," Scotty added. "Booted back to home sweet home."
"Like a bottle rocket," said Riker.
"Nae you've got it, Commander."
"Of course, it'll take a little time," Geordi continued.
"And we'll need some kindae way to direct the ship to exactly where we want her to go."
Chekov and Wesley, who'd been forced to sit at the kids' table, snapped their fingers in unison.
"Vhat about a modified tractor beam that is adzhusted for the variables time-space tractor beam set to the wariables adjusted tractor beam?" they said together in an excited rush.
Geordi and Scotty shared a glance, eyebrows raised. "That might work."
"How long will this take?" asked Picard.
"Hmm, modifying the phase inducers..."
"And ectoplying the main debuction array..."
"A week?" they guessed.
Both ends of the table spoke up:
"You have three days."
"Make it so."
It took a long time to get everyone out of the conference room. Ro and McCoy hung back, glaring at the excitedly chattering Data, Spock, Geordi, Scotty, Chekov, and Wesley.
"Sometimes I just wanna..." said Ro, gesturing something vaguely violent with her hands.
"Tell me about it, kid."
DAY ONE
NCC-1701-D, BRIDGE
2000 HOURS
"Excuse me, Counselor."
Troi turned to see Captain Kirk approaching from the turbolift.
"This must seem odd, since we've been acquainted for several hours now, but with one thing and another..." He chuckled softly. "I didn't have a chance to properly introduce myself to the D's crew."
"Jim Kirk," he said, reaching out a hand and smiling so his eyes sparkled.
"Deanna Troi," said Troi, suppressing a smile. She shook his hand lightly, ignoring how he lingered.
"How long have you been in Starfleet?"
She grinned at him. "I'm not going to sleep with you, Captain."
He looked shocked. "I, I'm sorry?"
"And no, I'm not going to give you a pity-kiss either."
After a minute's stunned silence, Kirk broke into a grin.
"You're a Betazoid," he said.
"Only half, but I sense emotions. Especially, ah, particularly strong ones."
"That, I'm sorry, that is awesome. So what am I feeling now?"
"Do you really need my help for that?" she answered, crossing her arms. Despite everything, she found herself thinking he really was quite adorable.
"I guess you're right." He paused, then looked around before stepping closer. "Hey. What about Bones? I mean, Doctor McCoy. Do you sense him, you know, feeling anything? In regard to me."
She raised her eyebrows at him.
He shrugged innocently.
"Hmm, well," she said. "Yes, actually."
"Really?"
"Yes, if you could make the word 'dammit' into an emotion. Yes."
Just then the turbolift doors whooshed open, and Riker stepped onto the bridge.
"Deanna, are you --"
He saw Kirk.
"Captain," he added with a tight smile. "Am I interrupting anything?"
"No, not at all," said Kirk with an easy grin, shifting in an attempt to sling his arm over Troi's shoulder. She evaded easily, walking up to join Riker.
"No, you are not," she told him, very firmly, tapping his chest. "Is dinner ready?"
"Uh, yes," he said, glancing at Kirk.
"Good," said Troi, taking his arm. "Good night, Captain," she called to Kirk sweetly as they left.
"Good night," Kirk grumbled.
DAY TWO
NCC-1701-D, BRIDGE
0730 HOURS
Despite his best efforts, Sulu couldn't help himself. He had to check out the futuristically badass controls of a Galaxy-class helm.
He got to their bridge early enough that he thought he'd be alone, but there was the lady doctor's son, sitting at the helm, chatting excitedly to a friend of his in the conn seat.
"Because that's what you HAVE to believe if you accept time as non-linear!" the kid was saying. "Which you HAVE to do in order to work with post-Hawking physics in the first place!"
"Right?" said his friend. "Exactly. Ex-fucking-zactly. I try to explain this stuff to him, but it's like he doesn't even care, when meanwhile I'm telling him how he's able to fly in the first place."
Sulu furrowed his brow. The other kid's voice sounded vaguely familiar.
"Tch, you can't make them understand if they don't want to," the doctor's son was saying, shaking his head, when he noticed Sulu.
"Hey!" he said. "Look who it is, Pavel! Speak of the devil."
His friend turned around. It was Chekov.
"Hikaru, how the hell are you up so early?" Chekov said, after doing a double take. He was blushing, but laughing, too.
Sulu just held his coffee mug, speechless.
"Well, whatever, it's nothing he hasn't heard before," Chekov told the kid, waving his hand dismissively.
"Pavel," Sulu finally managed to say.
Chekov beamed up at him. "Yeah?"
"What -- you -- what happened?"
"What do you mean?"
"Your," said Sulu. He swallowed. "Your accent."
The kid and Chekov exchanged a glance, then started to laugh.
"Pavel still has an accent, Lieutenant Sulu," the kid said. "If he tries to talk in Standard, that is."
"I'm speaking Russian!" Chekov told him, ecstatic.
"Universal translators were perfected fifty years ago," the kid explained.
"Oh," said Sulu.
"Why, Hikaru? Do you miss my adorable broken English?" Chekov put his chin on one hand, smiling mischievously. "Am I less cute now?"
"Of, of course not," said Sulu weakly.
"Aw!" Chekov sprang up and wrapped his arms around Sulu's neck. "You look so forlorn! Come on, you wanna go back and have breakfast and hear me struggle with my consonants?"
Sulu stared at his feet.
"Yes," he said finally, pouting at his coffee mug.
"Okay, come on, lapochka," said Chekov indulgently, patting Sulu's back. "See you later, Wesley."
"See you later -- wait!" said the kid. "How'd you say THAT -- lappacha or whatever --in Russian, instead of it being translated?"
Chekov froze and stared down at the kid, then up at Sulu.
"I don't... know," he said, looking a little frightened.
DAY TWO
NCC-1701, NO BLOODY A, B, C, OR D
SICKBAY, 1100 HOURS
McCoy crossed his arms. "I think you'll find I keep a pretty damn clean sickbay, Dr. Crusher. No matter how 'primitive' it may be."
"Indeed you do, Doctor," said Crusher mildly, running her tricorder over the optical apparatus.
"Yeah, well." McCoy hmmphed. "And I suppose you won't share any of your ship's superior technology because of the Prime Directive, or some nonsense. Or any of your Starfleet Medical journals, if you even have any."
"Hmm?" Crusher said, distracted. "Oh. I brought some with me." She gestured to a large bag she'd left on one of the biobeds. "I worked at Starfleet Medical for a few years -- didn't know if my patients were getting the best care, and I wanted to change that."
She closed her tricorder and turned to him. "I was wondering, Doctor, if you'd like to come back to my sickbay later. To get the specs for the technology we use, my files on new treatments, that sort of thing?"
"Uh." McCoy blinked at her a few times, then looked away. "Sure," he said gruffly.
"At the very least, I'm sure Geordi would like to let you examine his VISOR."
McCoy cleared his throat.
"Nice, uh, piece of machinery, that one," he said to the wall. "Mr. La Forge told me it never, uh, causes him discomfort?"
"Mm," said Crusher, looking into the scanner viewscreen. "Not anymore. Mr. Data and I built a new model for him a few years ago. I don't accept Medical's opinion that chronic migraines should be an acceptable price in allowing the blind to see. Is this a combination atomic microscope, Doctor McCoy?"
She looked up to see him staring.
"Doctor McCoy?" She smiled at him, brushing one soft-looking lock of hair behind her ear.
Just then Kirk burst in.
"Bones, you'll never believe this, one of the hottest women on their ship and she's all cozy with that beardy sasquatch-looking..."
He trailed off when he noticed the two doctors staring at him, Crusher politely, McCoy murderously.
He glanced at Crusher.
"Bones, you have got to be kidding me," he wailed.
"Jim, I think you have somewhere you need to be," McCoy growled.
"Right in my back," Kirk cried to the heavens, even when McCoy had taken him by the shoulder and was about to throw him through the door. "A knife, right in my back! ET TU, BONESE?"
DAY TWO
NCC-1701, BRIDGE
1850 HOURS
"Of course," Yeoman Rand was saying, "it's just a hobby of mine. I'm sure nothing can compare with the vineyards of France."
"Not at all, Ms. Rand," answered Picard. "These white grapes you're telling me about -- you cultivated them from a shoot, not seedlings?"
"Yes, sir."
"That's extraordinary. My brother has been trying to perfect that technique for twenty years, without success. You are a very remarkable young woman."
Rand said nothing, just stared up at Picard in adoration.
At the science station, Kirk rolled his eyes.
"I would love to try a glass of Rand original white someday," Picard was saying.
Rand swallowed and tried to say something, but she knocked over her stylus instead. "Oh, I'm so sorry!"
"Not at all," Picard said, taking her PADD to help her.
"I'm so sorry..." Rand bent down as fast as she could, grabbed her stylus, and snapped back up, pulling at the hem of her skirt. She was tomato-faced.
"Please excuse me," she mumbled.
"Hmm?" Picard looked up from where he'd been reading. "Excuse you for what, Ms. Rand?"
"You mean... you weren't staring at..."
Picard laughed a little. "I'm afraid I am rather infatuated with the details of your irrigation method, if that's what you mean."
Rand just stared at him, her lips parted, eyes glassy. She might have let out a little "oh" sound.
"Well," announced Kirk loudly. "Thanks for that, Yeoman, but Captain Picard and I should really get back to these Unification briefings."
Rand shot him a poisonous look.
Just then, the ship rocked a little.
"Unidentified ship decloaking off starboard nacelle, sir," said Chekov.
"On screen," announced Picard and Kirk.
"Federation vessel," growled a Klingon from the viewscreen. "Our sensors have indicated a high activity of unusual spacetime warping at these coordinates. Surely, you're not trying anything so foolish as... time travel?"
"This is James T. Kirk of the Federation Starship Enterprise," said Kirk coolly, stepping down to address the Klingon head-on, "and I'd like to have the honor of knowing who I'm addressing before they dictate what exactly I can and cannot do."
He smirked up at the viewscreen.
There was a brief silence.
The Klingon sighed in disgust. "May I talk to an adult, please?"
"What?" exclaimed Kirk, going red.
"Really, anyone past puberty will do..." the Klingon was saying, looking past Kirk. His eyes suddenly narrowed. "Ah. Picard."
"Commander Koloth," Picard said with a nod.
"I confess I was curious as to why the Enterprise would be involved in such a unsavory business."
"Uh, I beg your pardon, here," Kirk began, but the Klingon talked right over him.
"Especially when the outcome of the civil war has so recently been decided. You were, of course, always a supporter of Gowron, I trust?"
Picard raised his eyebrows.
"An interesting question coming from you, Commander," he said mildly. "I believe it was your own brother R'Hlek who told me that deciding against Duras would be 'pig's-death suicide,' during my time on the Kliz?"
The Klingon narrowed his eyes further.
"Of course, I may be misremembering. I never could hold my blood wine."
There was a deathly silence.
Then the entire Klingon bridge broke into raucous laughter.
"Oh," said the commander, wheezing and wiping his eyes. "Humans! Drinking blood wine! Picard, you never cease to be hilarious, it's been far too long. So what exactly is going on here? I have to report something to the High Council."
"An errant causality loop, already repaired."
"Ah, k'pekt, causality loops! I hate those. I once got stuck at my sister's wedding for five weeks; I can never eat Krada leg again. Well, go to it, Picard, and don't take any bad blood wine, ha ha ha. Qa'pla!"
"Qa'pla," said Picard with a fond salute, as the Bird-of-Prey shimmered back under cloak.
The bridge was quiet for a moment.
"Captain Picard?" Uhura spoke up. "Please forgive me for speaking freely, but that was... amazing."
"I must agree," said Spock.
"Bad, ass," Sulu mouthed to Chekov.
"I'LL BE IN MY QUARTERS," Kirk bellowed, stomping to the turbolift.
Everyone stared after him.
DAY THREE
NCC-1701-D, TEN-FORWARD LOUNGE
0300 HOURS
Kirk pushed his empty glass forward.
"Another one," he said, slurring. "And I'd like some alcohol please in it this time, if you please."
"Jim, I've been giving you genuine whiskey for the past two hours," the bartender told him. "I'd really rather if you didn't throw up all over my bar."
"I won't," said Kirk, offended. He stared at the bartender for a minute.
"I'm sorry, I'm a little drunksy, but have we met?"
"Oh, probably," she said with a sigh. "I can't remember at this point."
"I mean." Kirk gave her a crooked smile. "I mean, besides in my dreams, of course."
"You're a little young for me," she told him, tapping his nose.
"I thought I was too old for everybody here."
"Not in my case." The bartender glanced to the side. Kirk followed her gaze to see a woman, species young-alien-hot, sliding into the stool next to him.
"The usual, straight," she told the bartender crisply. "And make it a double, would you?"
"You're up a little past your bedtime, Laren," the bartender remarked, getting two bottles.
"Yeah, well, Tweedledee and Tweedledum have been driving me crazy. Not to mention the wunderkinds." She glanced at Kirk. "You're drooling."
"Can you blame me?" he slurred, which he was actually pretty proud of, given the circumstances. The woman had already turned away, though.
"They have me replacing circuits in the mainframe at all hours of the night because Data has burned, them out." She emphasized this with two incredulous hands. "Burned them out, Guinan."
"How?"
The woman threw her hands up higher. "Accessing them? Reading them? Giving them to Spock? I have no idea."
"Hey, Spock," said Kirk, pointing at the woman with his glass.
She turned her focused gaze to him.
"Yeah?" she said, sounding impatient. "What about him?"
"Uh," he said, feeling a little wilted under the intensity. "Uh, he's, my friend."
She let out a disbelieving laugh. "Really."
"Yeah, he's my first officer," Kirk said with a little more confidence.
The woman looked him up and down, extremely quickly. Then she made a noise of derision.
"You're the other captain, then," she said through a poorly-hidden smile, rolling her eyes and taking her drink.
"Yes, I am the 'other captain.'" Kirk knocked back his whiskey in one angry swallow. "Nice to fucking meet you."
"What's your problem?" said the woman, sounding amused.
"Oh, nothing, nothing at all. I'm fine! Just having fun with my crappy little self at this crappy little bar before I leave tomorrow on my ker-RAPPY little ship."
The woman turned to look at him more fully. She was grinning now.
"Well, it may be crappy, but it does have that sweet manual helm option," she pointed out.
"Does it."
"Yeah, Hikaru was telling me all about it today."
"Hikaru?" Kirk slammed his glass on the bar, staring at her in disbelief. "Hikaru Sulu. The gay pilot."
"Well, I don't know if he's gay, but yeah, I kind of assumed he was a pilot, the way he, you know, introduced himself as the pilot, and --"
"No! This is perfect! This is just perfect. The exotic scantily clad empath is like soulbonded with the beard guy, the women who aren't boning Spock on my own ship have fallen for the bald metrosexual FRENCHMAN, my best friend abandons me for the sexy redhead doctor, and now the one woman who might have taken pity on me has the hots for my fucking gay pilot. It's perfect."
The woman was staring at him.
"Wait a second," she said finally. "Let me get this straight. This is about you... getting laid?"
He looked straight into her eyes.
"Yeah," he said, biting off the word. "Yeah, it is. Okay? It is."
She looked at him disbelievingly.
"Well, why didn't you say so in the first place?" she said. "Come on."
Kirk blinked at her.
"Pretty ridiculously easy remedy." She hopped off the stool, and took him by the arm. "My quarters are this way. Guinan, put it on my tab."
"Just don't tell me anything about it tomorrow," was the bartender's reply.
"In case you're wondering," the woman told Kirk as she walked him to the door, "I'm clean, but we're using phylactics anyway. Got it?"
"Y-yeah, fine," squeaked Kirk, gazing at her like she was the sun.
DAY THREE
NCC-1701, BRIDGE
1300 HOURS
"Report, Mr. Scott," said Kirk, settling back into his chair very, very comfortably.
"Deflector online, all systems go," replied Scotty's exhausted voice.
"And you said you couldn't do it in three days."
"Yes, well, there is the fact I am in a damn near coma, sir."
"Nonsense! I'm looking at Mr. La Forge right now and he's chipper as a foxsquirrel."
On the viewscreen was the now-familiar sight of the Enterprise-D's bridge. Geordi was sitting at the conn, his arms crossed and his head slumped forward.
"Should we tell him --" Uhura whispered.
"No," Spock replied.
"Well, Captain," said Kirk to the viewscreen, taking a deep breath. "I guess this is goodbye."
"It was my honor to work with one of the finest captains in Starfleet history," Picard said.
"Same here," said Kirk, with a smile. "I mean you, not me," he added after a second. "Because I'm sure you're going to be a really good captain someday, too."
"Thank you, Mr. Kirk."
"You're welcome, Mr. Picard."
"Mister Spock, always a pleasure," Picard added, nodding to the science station.
"Yes, it was very nice seeing you again, Mr. Spock," said Data.
"We'll miss you, Spock," said a teary Troi.
"Oh, no sentimental goodbyes!" Kirk said, through his teeth. "I'm sure we'll all end up meeting again someday, anyway."
The Enterprise-D crew all nodded glumly.
"Farewell, future!" said Kirk grandly. "I look forward to exploring your undiscovered country myself someday." He managed to wink at both Crusher and Troi at the same time. "Mr. Sulu, thrusters to full."
"Aye, sir."
"Mr. Chekov?"
"Deflection dish has reached optimal warying speeds, sir."
"Excellent. Mr. Spock?"
"Ah... yes, Jim?"
"Nothing, just wanted to make sure you were there. All right, Captain, it's all you now."
"Then make it so, Mr. Data," they heard Picard say, right before there was a blinding flash and a deafening boom.
The world went plaid.
Epilogue
Two days later
"Report, Mr. Sulu."
"We should be reaching Starbase 11 in a little over an hour, sir."
"Good." Kirk swiveled in his chair, then paused.
"Captain?" said Spock, raising one eyebrow.
Kirk looked up. "Hmm? Oh. Ha. I was just thinking about time, I suppose. How strange it can be... yet how familiar, at the same time."
"Do you mean how some things can seem to change?" asked Sulu, glancing at Chekov.
"Vhen they really stay the same?" Chekov said, blushing a little.
"Perhaps how kindred spirits can be found in ages distant," mused Spock, "even in beings one might not have assumed to have a spirit in the first place."
"Or how even the bitterest wars can someday turn to peace," said Uhura, running a finger along her Klingon dictionary PADD.
"No, I was more thinking about how it's lunchtime and I didn't even realize it," said Kirk, making his way to the turbolift. "Mr. Spock, you have the bridge."
Everyone stared after him.
NCC-1701
SICKBAY
1200 HOURS
"What do you want, Jim," said McCoy in a monotone, not looking up from his journals.
Kirk flung himself tragically onto a biobed. "I'll never be able to speak to her again, Bones."
"Lucky her."
"My one true love in the history of the universe, and I never even learned her name!"
"'Ro Laren,' I think," said McCoy, sipping his coffee and turning the page.
"Shh!" Kirk sprang up to glare at him. "Don't tell me, you're ruining it."
"Ruining what, Jim?" McCoy said with a sigh.
"My moment."
"Of idiocy?"
"No, damn it, my moment of heartbreak." Kirk lay back down, pressing the back of his hand to his eyes. "When I feel like life's not worth living anymore."
"Don't be a moron."
"Until... someone, shows me the error of my ways."
There was a silence.
"'No, Jim!'" Kirk went on, his eyes still closed. "I never thought I could tell you this, but I love you. I... I've always loved you.' 'No, it's no use, I've lost her, I've lost everything.' 'Dammit, Jim! Open your eyes to what's right in front of you!'"
Still silence.
Kirk glanced up, to see McCoy still sipping his coffee.
"You're shit at this," McCoy said to his journals finally, trying not to laugh when Kirk leapt off the biobed and onto his lap.
[ENDING CREDITS]
[PARAMOUNT STILL]
Author: Fair Hearing
Pairings: Er, a lot. But most relevant to interests, the STXI Holy Trinity of Kirk/McCoy, Spock/Uhura, and Chekov/Sulu.
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Crossover with TNG, language, womanizing, continual crack.
Kink request: "AOS Enterprise gets caught in a time loop until the Enterprise-D finds them. A whole alternate timeline getting mashed into theirs 1. gives everyone a headache and 2. puts both crews in proximity while young and virile."
Notes: WELL, I THOUGHT IT WAS FUNNY, ANYWAY.
"Judging from the evidence collected around the ship, I theorize we may be caught in a temporal causality loop," said Spock.
"See, I knew he was going to say that, Jim," said McCoy.
"As I knew you would say that, Doctor."
"Well," said Kirk, deep in thought, "what c-"
"Caused it? Likely, an explosion that..."
"...'created a tear in space-time,'" Sulu said, without even looking up.
"Indeed. We --"
"...'collided, exploded, then were sent back to the beginning of the loop'," said Uhura, one finger up like she was reciting a poem, "'there to replay the'..."
"...'entire scenario from the wery beginning, ad nauseum.'"
"Thank you, Ensign. As you can doubtless tell, Captain, we must have repeated this cycle many times -- perhaps for months, even years, judging by how well the crew has memorized my explanation."
"Hmm." Kirk looked unconvinced.
"Have you not been experiencing what humans call 'déjà vu'?"
Kirk grinned. "Didn't you just --"
"Ask me that?" the entire bridge crew grumbled in unison.
Kirk looked crestfallen.
Just then the red alert proximity klaxons started to wail.
"Captain!" shouted Chekov. "I'm picking up a huge spacial distortion, five thousand kilometers off the port bow!"
"Full reverse, Mr. Sulu," said Kirk, gripping the arms of his chair.
"The helm's not responding, Captain!"
"Impact imminent! In three, two, one --"
Chekov's voice would be the last thing any of them ever heard.
Until the lights came back on.
The engines thrummed to life again around a bridge crew that was frozen in various states of last-second panic.
"Uh," mumbled Kirk after a second, both his hands still raised. "Status?"
"All systems online, sir," said Sulu, cautiously raising his head.
"All decks reporting in, no casualties," said Spock.
"The distortion is, ah, gone, sir," said Chekov. His voice kept switching octaves. "It seems we were knocked away from impact by... some kind of tractor beam."
"Whose?"
"I'm not sure, I --"
"Captain, sensors are picking up a vessel off the port bow. Signature is... Starfleet..." Spock looked uncharacteristically confused as he stared at his monitor.
"Hail them," said Kirk, exactly at the same time Uhura said "They're hailing us."
"Um. Open a channel," said Kirk, standing.
"This is Captain James T. Kirk of the Federation st--" he began, before the sight of a Klingon in some kind of Federation uniform made him stop in mid-sentence.
The other captain had started talking at the same time as Kirk. "... Picard of the Federation starship Enterprise..."
The other captain stopped.
"Did you say, 'Kirk'?"
"Did you say 'Enterprise'?"
Spock and the gold-skinned ops officer on the other ship remarked on this development at exactly the same time.
"Intriguing."
STAR TREK
GENERATIONS GAPS
Starring
Commanding Officers Captain James T. Kirk and Captain Jean-Luc Picard
Chief Science Officers Spock and Data OTP
Chief Medical Officers Leonard McCoy and Beverly Howard Crusher
Chief Engineers Montgomery Scott and Geordi La Forge
Chief Gettin'-Some Officers William Thomas Riker and James T. Kirk
Chief Communications Officers Nyota Uhura and... the Computer
Kickass Pilots Hikaru Sulu and Ro Laren OTP
Excitable Ensigns Pavel Andreivich Chekov and Wesley Crusher
Lonely Klingon Worf Rozhenko, son of Mogh
Chief Eye-Candy Officers Deanna Troi and James T. Kirk
[Commercial Sign]
DAY ONE
NCC-1701-D CONFERENCE ROOM
1800 HOURS
"...so you see, Captains, the original Enterprise has not only inadvertently traveled through time, it has also shifted to the universe its officers refer to as 'Universe Prime.'"
"Like a derailed train," said Uhura. She had to hold her elbows in to fit in the extremely crowded conference room.
"Precisely, Lieutenant Uhura," Data replied, nodding at her.
"Wait a second," said Kirk, from one end of the table. "How do we know we're in a parallel universe?"
"Yes, couldn't this be an entirely new reality, Mr. Data?" said Picard from the other end.
Data quirked his head.
"A possibility we could recognize except for one fact, Captain," said Spock, switching to a new slide. "Vulcan is quite whole in this universe, while Romulus and my counterpart are both nowhere to be found."
"Like a disappearing magician," Troi mused.
"Exactly, Counselor."
"Wait, I thought that whole Romulus thing happens in the future," McCoy grumbled. "Your guys' future, I mean. After the Enterprise-E and everything."
Spock quirked his head.
"An excellent point, Doctor," Data said, switching to a new slide. "However, the effect of the Enterprise Prime's century-long sojourn in the fabric of spacetime has caused some events connected with its inhabitants to occur sooner than they should."
"Like a video on fast-forward," Sulu said thoughtfully.
"Just so, Lieutenant."
"So what exactly are we supposed to do about it?" Worf asked grumpily, sticking his head inside the room. He was sitting crosslegged outside the door at the older crew's request.
Data quirked his head.
"Mr. Data and I have been working with Engineers Scott and La Forge on this very question, Mr. Worf," said Spock, switching to a new slide.
"We think if we can reverse the polarity of the Enterprise-D's saucer shields," Geordi spoke up, gesticulating as he paced in an extremely small circle, "we can generate a static warp bubble that could travel through both time and space without hurting anyone inside it."
"Just add a wee bit o' dilithium juice, and whammo," Scotty added. "Booted back to home sweet home."
"Like a bottle rocket," said Riker.
"Nae you've got it, Commander."
"Of course, it'll take a little time," Geordi continued.
"And we'll need some kindae way to direct the ship to exactly where we want her to go."
Chekov and Wesley, who'd been forced to sit at the kids' table, snapped their fingers in unison.
"Vhat about a modified tractor beam that is adzhusted for the variables time-space tractor beam set to the wariables adjusted tractor beam?" they said together in an excited rush.
Geordi and Scotty shared a glance, eyebrows raised. "That might work."
"How long will this take?" asked Picard.
"Hmm, modifying the phase inducers..."
"And ectoplying the main debuction array..."
"A week?" they guessed.
Both ends of the table spoke up:
"You have three days."
"Make it so."
It took a long time to get everyone out of the conference room. Ro and McCoy hung back, glaring at the excitedly chattering Data, Spock, Geordi, Scotty, Chekov, and Wesley.
"Sometimes I just wanna..." said Ro, gesturing something vaguely violent with her hands.
"Tell me about it, kid."
DAY ONE
NCC-1701-D, BRIDGE
2000 HOURS
"Excuse me, Counselor."
Troi turned to see Captain Kirk approaching from the turbolift.
"This must seem odd, since we've been acquainted for several hours now, but with one thing and another..." He chuckled softly. "I didn't have a chance to properly introduce myself to the D's crew."
"Jim Kirk," he said, reaching out a hand and smiling so his eyes sparkled.
"Deanna Troi," said Troi, suppressing a smile. She shook his hand lightly, ignoring how he lingered.
"How long have you been in Starfleet?"
She grinned at him. "I'm not going to sleep with you, Captain."
He looked shocked. "I, I'm sorry?"
"And no, I'm not going to give you a pity-kiss either."
After a minute's stunned silence, Kirk broke into a grin.
"You're a Betazoid," he said.
"Only half, but I sense emotions. Especially, ah, particularly strong ones."
"That, I'm sorry, that is awesome. So what am I feeling now?"
"Do you really need my help for that?" she answered, crossing her arms. Despite everything, she found herself thinking he really was quite adorable.
"I guess you're right." He paused, then looked around before stepping closer. "Hey. What about Bones? I mean, Doctor McCoy. Do you sense him, you know, feeling anything? In regard to me."
She raised her eyebrows at him.
He shrugged innocently.
"Hmm, well," she said. "Yes, actually."
"Really?"
"Yes, if you could make the word 'dammit' into an emotion. Yes."
Just then the turbolift doors whooshed open, and Riker stepped onto the bridge.
"Deanna, are you --"
He saw Kirk.
"Captain," he added with a tight smile. "Am I interrupting anything?"
"No, not at all," said Kirk with an easy grin, shifting in an attempt to sling his arm over Troi's shoulder. She evaded easily, walking up to join Riker.
"No, you are not," she told him, very firmly, tapping his chest. "Is dinner ready?"
"Uh, yes," he said, glancing at Kirk.
"Good," said Troi, taking his arm. "Good night, Captain," she called to Kirk sweetly as they left.
"Good night," Kirk grumbled.
DAY TWO
NCC-1701-D, BRIDGE
0730 HOURS
Despite his best efforts, Sulu couldn't help himself. He had to check out the futuristically badass controls of a Galaxy-class helm.
He got to their bridge early enough that he thought he'd be alone, but there was the lady doctor's son, sitting at the helm, chatting excitedly to a friend of his in the conn seat.
"Because that's what you HAVE to believe if you accept time as non-linear!" the kid was saying. "Which you HAVE to do in order to work with post-Hawking physics in the first place!"
"Right?" said his friend. "Exactly. Ex-fucking-zactly. I try to explain this stuff to him, but it's like he doesn't even care, when meanwhile I'm telling him how he's able to fly in the first place."
Sulu furrowed his brow. The other kid's voice sounded vaguely familiar.
"Tch, you can't make them understand if they don't want to," the doctor's son was saying, shaking his head, when he noticed Sulu.
"Hey!" he said. "Look who it is, Pavel! Speak of the devil."
His friend turned around. It was Chekov.
"Hikaru, how the hell are you up so early?" Chekov said, after doing a double take. He was blushing, but laughing, too.
Sulu just held his coffee mug, speechless.
"Well, whatever, it's nothing he hasn't heard before," Chekov told the kid, waving his hand dismissively.
"Pavel," Sulu finally managed to say.
Chekov beamed up at him. "Yeah?"
"What -- you -- what happened?"
"What do you mean?"
"Your," said Sulu. He swallowed. "Your accent."
The kid and Chekov exchanged a glance, then started to laugh.
"Pavel still has an accent, Lieutenant Sulu," the kid said. "If he tries to talk in Standard, that is."
"I'm speaking Russian!" Chekov told him, ecstatic.
"Universal translators were perfected fifty years ago," the kid explained.
"Oh," said Sulu.
"Why, Hikaru? Do you miss my adorable broken English?" Chekov put his chin on one hand, smiling mischievously. "Am I less cute now?"
"Of, of course not," said Sulu weakly.
"Aw!" Chekov sprang up and wrapped his arms around Sulu's neck. "You look so forlorn! Come on, you wanna go back and have breakfast and hear me struggle with my consonants?"
Sulu stared at his feet.
"Yes," he said finally, pouting at his coffee mug.
"Okay, come on, lapochka," said Chekov indulgently, patting Sulu's back. "See you later, Wesley."
"See you later -- wait!" said the kid. "How'd you say THAT -- lappacha or whatever --in Russian, instead of it being translated?"
Chekov froze and stared down at the kid, then up at Sulu.
"I don't... know," he said, looking a little frightened.
DAY TWO
NCC-1701, NO BLOODY A, B, C, OR D
SICKBAY, 1100 HOURS
McCoy crossed his arms. "I think you'll find I keep a pretty damn clean sickbay, Dr. Crusher. No matter how 'primitive' it may be."
"Indeed you do, Doctor," said Crusher mildly, running her tricorder over the optical apparatus.
"Yeah, well." McCoy hmmphed. "And I suppose you won't share any of your ship's superior technology because of the Prime Directive, or some nonsense. Or any of your Starfleet Medical journals, if you even have any."
"Hmm?" Crusher said, distracted. "Oh. I brought some with me." She gestured to a large bag she'd left on one of the biobeds. "I worked at Starfleet Medical for a few years -- didn't know if my patients were getting the best care, and I wanted to change that."
She closed her tricorder and turned to him. "I was wondering, Doctor, if you'd like to come back to my sickbay later. To get the specs for the technology we use, my files on new treatments, that sort of thing?"
"Uh." McCoy blinked at her a few times, then looked away. "Sure," he said gruffly.
"At the very least, I'm sure Geordi would like to let you examine his VISOR."
McCoy cleared his throat.
"Nice, uh, piece of machinery, that one," he said to the wall. "Mr. La Forge told me it never, uh, causes him discomfort?"
"Mm," said Crusher, looking into the scanner viewscreen. "Not anymore. Mr. Data and I built a new model for him a few years ago. I don't accept Medical's opinion that chronic migraines should be an acceptable price in allowing the blind to see. Is this a combination atomic microscope, Doctor McCoy?"
She looked up to see him staring.
"Doctor McCoy?" She smiled at him, brushing one soft-looking lock of hair behind her ear.
Just then Kirk burst in.
"Bones, you'll never believe this, one of the hottest women on their ship and she's all cozy with that beardy sasquatch-looking..."
He trailed off when he noticed the two doctors staring at him, Crusher politely, McCoy murderously.
He glanced at Crusher.
"Bones, you have got to be kidding me," he wailed.
"Jim, I think you have somewhere you need to be," McCoy growled.
"Right in my back," Kirk cried to the heavens, even when McCoy had taken him by the shoulder and was about to throw him through the door. "A knife, right in my back! ET TU, BONESE?"
DAY TWO
NCC-1701, BRIDGE
1850 HOURS
"Of course," Yeoman Rand was saying, "it's just a hobby of mine. I'm sure nothing can compare with the vineyards of France."
"Not at all, Ms. Rand," answered Picard. "These white grapes you're telling me about -- you cultivated them from a shoot, not seedlings?"
"Yes, sir."
"That's extraordinary. My brother has been trying to perfect that technique for twenty years, without success. You are a very remarkable young woman."
Rand said nothing, just stared up at Picard in adoration.
At the science station, Kirk rolled his eyes.
"I would love to try a glass of Rand original white someday," Picard was saying.
Rand swallowed and tried to say something, but she knocked over her stylus instead. "Oh, I'm so sorry!"
"Not at all," Picard said, taking her PADD to help her.
"I'm so sorry..." Rand bent down as fast as she could, grabbed her stylus, and snapped back up, pulling at the hem of her skirt. She was tomato-faced.
"Please excuse me," she mumbled.
"Hmm?" Picard looked up from where he'd been reading. "Excuse you for what, Ms. Rand?"
"You mean... you weren't staring at..."
Picard laughed a little. "I'm afraid I am rather infatuated with the details of your irrigation method, if that's what you mean."
Rand just stared at him, her lips parted, eyes glassy. She might have let out a little "oh" sound.
"Well," announced Kirk loudly. "Thanks for that, Yeoman, but Captain Picard and I should really get back to these Unification briefings."
Rand shot him a poisonous look.
Just then, the ship rocked a little.
"Unidentified ship decloaking off starboard nacelle, sir," said Chekov.
"On screen," announced Picard and Kirk.
"Federation vessel," growled a Klingon from the viewscreen. "Our sensors have indicated a high activity of unusual spacetime warping at these coordinates. Surely, you're not trying anything so foolish as... time travel?"
"This is James T. Kirk of the Federation Starship Enterprise," said Kirk coolly, stepping down to address the Klingon head-on, "and I'd like to have the honor of knowing who I'm addressing before they dictate what exactly I can and cannot do."
He smirked up at the viewscreen.
There was a brief silence.
The Klingon sighed in disgust. "May I talk to an adult, please?"
"What?" exclaimed Kirk, going red.
"Really, anyone past puberty will do..." the Klingon was saying, looking past Kirk. His eyes suddenly narrowed. "Ah. Picard."
"Commander Koloth," Picard said with a nod.
"I confess I was curious as to why the Enterprise would be involved in such a unsavory business."
"Uh, I beg your pardon, here," Kirk began, but the Klingon talked right over him.
"Especially when the outcome of the civil war has so recently been decided. You were, of course, always a supporter of Gowron, I trust?"
Picard raised his eyebrows.
"An interesting question coming from you, Commander," he said mildly. "I believe it was your own brother R'Hlek who told me that deciding against Duras would be 'pig's-death suicide,' during my time on the Kliz?"
The Klingon narrowed his eyes further.
"Of course, I may be misremembering. I never could hold my blood wine."
There was a deathly silence.
Then the entire Klingon bridge broke into raucous laughter.
"Oh," said the commander, wheezing and wiping his eyes. "Humans! Drinking blood wine! Picard, you never cease to be hilarious, it's been far too long. So what exactly is going on here? I have to report something to the High Council."
"An errant causality loop, already repaired."
"Ah, k'pekt, causality loops! I hate those. I once got stuck at my sister's wedding for five weeks; I can never eat Krada leg again. Well, go to it, Picard, and don't take any bad blood wine, ha ha ha. Qa'pla!"
"Qa'pla," said Picard with a fond salute, as the Bird-of-Prey shimmered back under cloak.
The bridge was quiet for a moment.
"Captain Picard?" Uhura spoke up. "Please forgive me for speaking freely, but that was... amazing."
"I must agree," said Spock.
"Bad, ass," Sulu mouthed to Chekov.
"I'LL BE IN MY QUARTERS," Kirk bellowed, stomping to the turbolift.
Everyone stared after him.
DAY THREE
NCC-1701-D, TEN-FORWARD LOUNGE
0300 HOURS
Kirk pushed his empty glass forward.
"Another one," he said, slurring. "And I'd like some alcohol please in it this time, if you please."
"Jim, I've been giving you genuine whiskey for the past two hours," the bartender told him. "I'd really rather if you didn't throw up all over my bar."
"I won't," said Kirk, offended. He stared at the bartender for a minute.
"I'm sorry, I'm a little drunksy, but have we met?"
"Oh, probably," she said with a sigh. "I can't remember at this point."
"I mean." Kirk gave her a crooked smile. "I mean, besides in my dreams, of course."
"You're a little young for me," she told him, tapping his nose.
"I thought I was too old for everybody here."
"Not in my case." The bartender glanced to the side. Kirk followed her gaze to see a woman, species young-alien-hot, sliding into the stool next to him.
"The usual, straight," she told the bartender crisply. "And make it a double, would you?"
"You're up a little past your bedtime, Laren," the bartender remarked, getting two bottles.
"Yeah, well, Tweedledee and Tweedledum have been driving me crazy. Not to mention the wunderkinds." She glanced at Kirk. "You're drooling."
"Can you blame me?" he slurred, which he was actually pretty proud of, given the circumstances. The woman had already turned away, though.
"They have me replacing circuits in the mainframe at all hours of the night because Data has burned, them out." She emphasized this with two incredulous hands. "Burned them out, Guinan."
"How?"
The woman threw her hands up higher. "Accessing them? Reading them? Giving them to Spock? I have no idea."
"Hey, Spock," said Kirk, pointing at the woman with his glass.
She turned her focused gaze to him.
"Yeah?" she said, sounding impatient. "What about him?"
"Uh," he said, feeling a little wilted under the intensity. "Uh, he's, my friend."
She let out a disbelieving laugh. "Really."
"Yeah, he's my first officer," Kirk said with a little more confidence.
The woman looked him up and down, extremely quickly. Then she made a noise of derision.
"You're the other captain, then," she said through a poorly-hidden smile, rolling her eyes and taking her drink.
"Yes, I am the 'other captain.'" Kirk knocked back his whiskey in one angry swallow. "Nice to fucking meet you."
"What's your problem?" said the woman, sounding amused.
"Oh, nothing, nothing at all. I'm fine! Just having fun with my crappy little self at this crappy little bar before I leave tomorrow on my ker-RAPPY little ship."
The woman turned to look at him more fully. She was grinning now.
"Well, it may be crappy, but it does have that sweet manual helm option," she pointed out.
"Does it."
"Yeah, Hikaru was telling me all about it today."
"Hikaru?" Kirk slammed his glass on the bar, staring at her in disbelief. "Hikaru Sulu. The gay pilot."
"Well, I don't know if he's gay, but yeah, I kind of assumed he was a pilot, the way he, you know, introduced himself as the pilot, and --"
"No! This is perfect! This is just perfect. The exotic scantily clad empath is like soulbonded with the beard guy, the women who aren't boning Spock on my own ship have fallen for the bald metrosexual FRENCHMAN, my best friend abandons me for the sexy redhead doctor, and now the one woman who might have taken pity on me has the hots for my fucking gay pilot. It's perfect."
The woman was staring at him.
"Wait a second," she said finally. "Let me get this straight. This is about you... getting laid?"
He looked straight into her eyes.
"Yeah," he said, biting off the word. "Yeah, it is. Okay? It is."
She looked at him disbelievingly.
"Well, why didn't you say so in the first place?" she said. "Come on."
Kirk blinked at her.
"Pretty ridiculously easy remedy." She hopped off the stool, and took him by the arm. "My quarters are this way. Guinan, put it on my tab."
"Just don't tell me anything about it tomorrow," was the bartender's reply.
"In case you're wondering," the woman told Kirk as she walked him to the door, "I'm clean, but we're using phylactics anyway. Got it?"
"Y-yeah, fine," squeaked Kirk, gazing at her like she was the sun.
DAY THREE
NCC-1701, BRIDGE
1300 HOURS
"Report, Mr. Scott," said Kirk, settling back into his chair very, very comfortably.
"Deflector online, all systems go," replied Scotty's exhausted voice.
"And you said you couldn't do it in three days."
"Yes, well, there is the fact I am in a damn near coma, sir."
"Nonsense! I'm looking at Mr. La Forge right now and he's chipper as a foxsquirrel."
On the viewscreen was the now-familiar sight of the Enterprise-D's bridge. Geordi was sitting at the conn, his arms crossed and his head slumped forward.
"Should we tell him --" Uhura whispered.
"No," Spock replied.
"Well, Captain," said Kirk to the viewscreen, taking a deep breath. "I guess this is goodbye."
"It was my honor to work with one of the finest captains in Starfleet history," Picard said.
"Same here," said Kirk, with a smile. "I mean you, not me," he added after a second. "Because I'm sure you're going to be a really good captain someday, too."
"Thank you, Mr. Kirk."
"You're welcome, Mr. Picard."
"Mister Spock, always a pleasure," Picard added, nodding to the science station.
"Yes, it was very nice seeing you again, Mr. Spock," said Data.
"We'll miss you, Spock," said a teary Troi.
"Oh, no sentimental goodbyes!" Kirk said, through his teeth. "I'm sure we'll all end up meeting again someday, anyway."
The Enterprise-D crew all nodded glumly.
"Farewell, future!" said Kirk grandly. "I look forward to exploring your undiscovered country myself someday." He managed to wink at both Crusher and Troi at the same time. "Mr. Sulu, thrusters to full."
"Aye, sir."
"Mr. Chekov?"
"Deflection dish has reached optimal warying speeds, sir."
"Excellent. Mr. Spock?"
"Ah... yes, Jim?"
"Nothing, just wanted to make sure you were there. All right, Captain, it's all you now."
"Then make it so, Mr. Data," they heard Picard say, right before there was a blinding flash and a deafening boom.
The world went plaid.
Epilogue
Two days later
"Report, Mr. Sulu."
"We should be reaching Starbase 11 in a little over an hour, sir."
"Good." Kirk swiveled in his chair, then paused.
"Captain?" said Spock, raising one eyebrow.
Kirk looked up. "Hmm? Oh. Ha. I was just thinking about time, I suppose. How strange it can be... yet how familiar, at the same time."
"Do you mean how some things can seem to change?" asked Sulu, glancing at Chekov.
"Vhen they really stay the same?" Chekov said, blushing a little.
"Perhaps how kindred spirits can be found in ages distant," mused Spock, "even in beings one might not have assumed to have a spirit in the first place."
"Or how even the bitterest wars can someday turn to peace," said Uhura, running a finger along her Klingon dictionary PADD.
"No, I was more thinking about how it's lunchtime and I didn't even realize it," said Kirk, making his way to the turbolift. "Mr. Spock, you have the bridge."
Everyone stared after him.
NCC-1701
SICKBAY
1200 HOURS
"What do you want, Jim," said McCoy in a monotone, not looking up from his journals.
Kirk flung himself tragically onto a biobed. "I'll never be able to speak to her again, Bones."
"Lucky her."
"My one true love in the history of the universe, and I never even learned her name!"
"'Ro Laren,' I think," said McCoy, sipping his coffee and turning the page.
"Shh!" Kirk sprang up to glare at him. "Don't tell me, you're ruining it."
"Ruining what, Jim?" McCoy said with a sigh.
"My moment."
"Of idiocy?"
"No, damn it, my moment of heartbreak." Kirk lay back down, pressing the back of his hand to his eyes. "When I feel like life's not worth living anymore."
"Don't be a moron."
"Until... someone, shows me the error of my ways."
There was a silence.
"'No, Jim!'" Kirk went on, his eyes still closed. "I never thought I could tell you this, but I love you. I... I've always loved you.' 'No, it's no use, I've lost her, I've lost everything.' 'Dammit, Jim! Open your eyes to what's right in front of you!'"
Still silence.
Kirk glanced up, to see McCoy still sipping his coffee.
"You're shit at this," McCoy said to his journals finally, trying not to laugh when Kirk leapt off the biobed and onto his lap.
[ENDING CREDITS]
[PARAMOUNT STILL]