I've recently become acquainted with a woman who has a husband that she loves dearly. We will call her "Nimfie". Nimfie has a son with her husband. A few years later, she met Sire Krymisson. She loves him too. He is her Dominant. They all live together. She alternates their beds. It's fascinating really.

I can't tell you the amount of "vanilla" ( Read more... )

So my neck is bare yet again.

I love BDSM. I was wired to. I was always drawn to Dominance, confidence, aggression... and yes, I enjoy some types of pain. There's a dangerous way to play that way and a controlled way to play with it. Mick was fairly controlled with it. It's why I trusted Him and respected Him. But He lived D/s as a lifestyle. When I ( Read more... )

I now remember why working Sunday nights at the gym suck. Sure, it's only 4 hours, and I'm sitting in front of a computer. But I'm so hungover. Last semester, it was very nearly every Sunday, so I'm doing better. I'm not hungover from alcohol really..

I went to NYC Decompression/ Concrete Jungle this weekend. It was pretty  much a rave at the Queens ( Read more... )

So there's me and there's Playa Del Fuego.... then there's me at Playa Del Fuego.

With the man I adore. He brought me there.

Playa Del Fuego is a "burner event". A " celebration of the spirit of radical self-expression, community, and participation." There's lots of art, lots of costumes, lots of naked people, and lots of fire. Ooooh I really liked ( Read more... )

So I realized that many of my North Rockland friends... and others who follow along on my journal and don't get to see me on a regular basis might be a little confused. Who am I with now? What am I doing? What are my plans for the future. Besides random quibbles about running into exes and running into my old disordered behavior, I haven't really ( Read more... )

It's pretty sad when I find myself determining the success of my day based on the amount of calories I burned at the gym. It's sad that I can see old habits returning. I've been in recovery for four years now, had it all under control. I mean, I'm a health/gym nut, and eat right and workout, but it wasn't an obsession like before... and it's coming ( Read more... )

I worked with him again today. The vicious animal who tried very hard to own my mind by taking my body. My carnal fix. The man I went to when I craved brutality, when my masochism consumed me so much that I went to a beast who I knoew would pummel and abuse my body, and I would love every minute of it, even while I hated him the entire time.

I'd ( Read more... )

I'm not staring. I'm observing.

Airports are a good place to watch people. It's like the DMV. Everyone  has to use it. You see all kinds, from all backrounds and cultures in one place.

People intrigue me. Every individual is just that: an individual. Certainly, most are trying to fit into some kind of group, mold, clique or cult. Finding their place ( Read more... )

There is more than what is on the surface, in regard to any person or situation. There's always several layers, some that will never be exposed. Nothing is black and white, but "shades of grey". In short, things are complicated. One's perspective will never match anothers. And while we will all make our own judgements, because, well, we are only ( Read more... )

As morbid of a thought as it might be I often envision what my funeral would be like. If you know me somewhat well you would know how complicated my love/friendship life is.

I wonder how the horde of men (and boys) from my past, present, and potential future would interact:

Would anyone really talk to John (if he showed up)?

How many people that NO ( Read more... )