you said something the other day about needing his help to find your words; looks as if you were given it.
I still remember the day I met you two. It was 'strange' circumstances but definitely there has been an impact on my life as well. I may not know much about Phen as of late, but I do know for sure he'd want you to be happy. as always, let me know if I can help in that <3.
That was relatively the first word that came to my mind when I finished reading this. Your words are amazing Miki, as they always have been. There are several things you said that I had wished to say to you, but, I think they are the kinds of things that Phen had told me people need to realize for themself.
The main thing being that Phen will always be with you. He's always been there for you and I don't think that will change. In the passing of his physical being, he may have taught you something he's wanted you to see for a long time, most people need to learn it, and that is what you stated in your last two paragraphs. Phen will always be with you, and he will always watch out for you, remember that, please.
I'm not too sure what else to say, so, I suppose I'll just ask you to take care of yourself, it's what Phen would want I think.
unfortunately, i don't read my friend's page on this journal very often but when i do, i look forward to your entries. i must admit that at first i thought it was just a break up. then i started to realize that it was something much more. the curiosity in me is increasing. if you're willing, i'd like to hear more.
you write beautifully, which i'm sure i've told you before, and though i don't know you very well it seems like you said exactly what you wanted to say, perfectly.
I'm not too sure what to say. I am very flattered that you think I write well. I've been having quite the time lately, trying to find the right words...or even any words...to convey something. I'm not sure what I need to say anymore, it's like the words are simply gone.
it seems that it's a given fact that when something painful occurs is when the best writing comes to paper. i say that you write well because each time i've read your journal you've said something that's gotten to me, whether it was laughter, comfort, or sadness. either way, your writing isn't just writing. it's you and your thoughts. you're not writing for the sole purpose to get people's reactions. in my opinion, its more of an outlet and/or source of communication. sorry for the ramble. my point is, is that though you find it hard to convey words, i think you've done well in conveying just what he meant to you. i read the article you sent me and to be honest, it's just sad. the fact that they're unsure why he lost control just makes it seem like there was a reason this happened, even if no one can see it. i'm sorry for your's and everyone else's great loss. no one deserves to know this kind of hurt and emptiness.
"The loss of him has allowed me to realize how foolish I have been lately. I know now how crucial it is to love (as illogical as it may seem at times), and the only way I will be able to help him live is to do my very best to show the love he showed me to others."
And that, right there, mon ame, is why I wish I knew what it was like to lose someone.
Are you Miki?nekosbloodJanuary 12 2008, 02:56:33 UTC
So if I open my brother's address book and I find an address for this Miki in Verona, WI... is that you? I'm sorry if this is super invasive. I'm trying to get over the accident myself. I was suppose to give a deposition the other day, but it got canceled. I got put on a stronger anxiety medicine. Well, bordem kicked in and I decided to try to reach out to the people that knew Stephen. O__O DID YOU GIVE HIM THAT DOLL AND THAT BRACELET!? I think he said they were from Miki. Please delete this comment after you read it because I'd hate for people to read my retarded ramblings of trying to reach out to a deceased brother's friends. ♥Stephy
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your words are lovely.
you said something the other day about needing his help to find your words; looks as if you were given it.
I still remember the day I met you two. It was 'strange' circumstances but definitely there has been an impact on my life as well. I may not know much about Phen as of late, but I do know for sure he'd want you to be happy.
as always, let me know if I can help in that
<3.
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The main thing being that Phen will always be with you. He's always been there for you and I don't think that will change. In the passing of his physical being, he may have taught you something he's wanted you to see for a long time, most people need to learn it, and that is what you stated in your last two paragraphs. Phen will always be with you, and he will always watch out for you, remember that, please.
I'm not too sure what else to say, so, I suppose I'll just ask you to take care of yourself, it's what Phen would want I think.
-Jared
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But I tried. Sometimes that's all you can do.
http://www.acadiananow.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20050524/NEWS01/505240347/1002 That's the most pleasing article regarding what happened. It's the only one that touches on what he really was.
It doesn't begin to explain what he was to me, though. Nothing could.
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And that, right there, mon ame, is why I wish I knew what it was like to lose someone.
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Well, bordem kicked in and I decided to try to reach out to the people that knew Stephen.
O__O DID YOU GIVE HIM THAT DOLL AND THAT BRACELET!? I think he said they were from Miki.
Please delete this comment after you read it because I'd hate for people to read my retarded ramblings of trying to reach out to a deceased brother's friends.
♥Stephy
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And don't worry, I'm actually quite happy to hear from you. I hope you don't mind, but I'd like to keep this comment. It made me smile.
How are you doing, dear? <3
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I don't use this journal at all anymore. I stopped after this entry a couple years ago. My new journal is __derivativeofu.
Add me if you'd like, but I don't update much. Just as a warning. ^_^
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