hello world, thought i should finally give this place an update since it's really collecting dust like hell ( Read more... )

****HAPPY NEW YEAR ( Read more... )

In love with the new twilight song - a thousand years ( Read more... )

hello november.

it's been 2weeks since my last blogpost - which in essence, is a good thing i guess. i often come to this place when i need a space of my own; when i need to clear things up with myself, when i need to breathe & the air in the atmosphere isn't enough. when tears come into my eyes when i think about things. hais.

so my absence. my ( Read more... )

i don't know how long more before i can get sick of feeling pissed/sad/upset/just plain sad/irritated/angry/grumpy/afraid/scared/angry/worried. it's like someone took all the positive emotions right out of me and walked away.

or maybe i only feel that way, because it feels that one too many people just turned around and walked right out of my life ( Read more... )

I have a hell lot to do but i needed to grab some air so here i am ( Read more... )

i have a different score each day, for pain. today, it is a 9.5. not a full 10, because it can be worse, even worse. but all the same it's been a fucking miserable day. and the worst part is having to laugh and hide it all.

i keep thinking if i hide long enough, one day i may actually be fine.

:I i spend too much of my life looking back. but i don't ( Read more... )

im sorry. i never meant to hurt you, but i think i did.

my only defence, is that im hurt too.

IF your life ended right now, can you honestly say tt you lived it the way you wanted?

no. i can't. but i can say that i lived. so maybe living is painful, maybe i regret, maybe i want to tear myself apart for the wrong things i've done, for mistakes that haven't occured yet.

on one hand, i'm glad to say that i've lived. but on another hand.... i'd ( Read more... )

So it's friday today. The end of e-learning week. Had an online mcq today; i studied. i worried. i tried my best for it w my dear roomie. andddd. i got 31/40, which is really not bad right? then my day was ruined when i find out tt the mean, median is 32, and the highest is 38. damn. why am i always, forever, one step behind the bell curve, always ( Read more... )