Happy 2020!

[estelle]

It is going to be a GOOD year. I can feel it. It has to be with a number like that.
I would like to get married on the 20th of February but that is not going to happen. Anyways, moving swiftly along... Good year. I read that despite the cliché New Year's resolutions actually do make sense ...if you follow a couple of simple rules.

Choose your

Comments

[dadi]

I am definitely interested! As I am trying to slowly work my way out of my interior ADHD chaos, I need also a way to NOT ignore any to do lists I regularly make!

[estelle]

Okay, cool! I like reading about productivity and organisation... ADHD is mentioned a lot.

[zimtkeks]

I am trying to be patient and loving towards myself, instead of demanding too much. It's not a New Year's resolution (as I started figuring this out in December), but it's what I'm currently working on.

[estelle]

That is so wholesome! I want to get better at this but do not know how. What is your path?
I actally started as soon as the realisation hit as well. But I do not want to tell somebody in January that they should have started in December because what good does that do?

[zimtkeks]

Oh, I didn't mean to criticize you, just wanted to explain myself a bit further. :-)
Currently I'm trying to put only two items on my to-do list for the day and use the rest of the time to calm down and be nice to myself. Still struggling with that.

[estelle]

I did not feel criticized. I love it and wanted to convey why I can relate. A therapist told me years ago to be kinder to myself. It is hard to chnge behavior if you only have a negative commandment e.g. don't beat yourself up. I wanted to know if you had any positive action steps so thank you for answering! I have to develop mine.

[karmasoup]

Thanks for sharing this... It's a laudable goal... I hope you are able to make some progress.

[estelle]

Thank you!

[tsuki_no_bara]

>>you can do anything but you can't do everything<<

that's really, really smart, and a good thing to remember just in general. good luck with your half-sibs! lj is a great thing to use to help hold yourself accountable. :D especially since you just told everyone your goal and how you plan to meet it.

my goal is to figure out the best time of day to start a yoga practice (before work? after?), and then to start it.

[estelle]

I know! I thought twice whether I wanted to go with a real, personal goal or something standard like excercisw more. Which I also want to do but where I am not quite so vulnerable. I hope people keep writing, reading and commenting after LJ Idol is over.

I would say go with before breakfast if you can manage. After work you may be to tired and "skip it today". If you do something for yourself first thing in the morning the day has already been used well, whatever the rest may bring.

Then again I am not a morning person either or I would do this myself. I did it a couple of days with guidance at a retreat/convention and thought: Wow, that is such a good start into the day! I should do this every day!

But I don't.

[halfshellvenus]

remember that you can do anything but you can't do everything.
This is so key, and it's usually one of the first things we forget! We get all ambitious, and quickly torpedo ourselves by trying to commit too much time and effort to too many things.

I also liked that repairing the relationships were your _goal_, but the resolution was to try. It helps that you're aware of that, and I need to keep that in mind for my own goals.

[estelle]

I actually read that somewhere myself and thought it was a clever aphorism. The distinction between goal and resolution is mine though, born out of many nightmares of shouting, accusations and receivers being slammed down (well, red buttons being pressed). Or perfunctory niceties.
The only way to not let it scare me any more than it does is to take responsibility for the part in this that I can control, knowing full well thaat it may still not be enough.

Do you have any goals? Or resolutions?