Brutal honesty is not a virtue

[esprix]

Why does everyone seem to think that honesty MUST be brutal? Dears, it's not a requirement; nay, it's really only to be so in the most extreme of cases. The "nice, necessary, true" test doesn't include "nastiness for the sake of it." It's not something to be worn as a badge of honor; rather, it is something to be embarrassed by if it comes to

Comments

[doniago]

Preaching to the choir here.

[doniago]

"Can't it be both?"

:)

[esprix]

It *can* be. It *shouldn't* be, but it *can* be.

[doniago]

I was aiming for levity there...

[suba_al_hadid]

This. What you said.

[esprix]

It dumbfounds me. Maybe it's because we have too much internet anonymity that people think they can get away with being that way.

[suba_al_hadid]

Probably true - the internet is simultaneously more anonymous and more intimate, so it's easy to be more heart-to-heart. And more boot-to-pants too, as you observe.

[esprix]

Just running into it more and more lately.

[esprix]

Hence the "nice, necessary, true" test I thank bovil for teaching me.

[bovil]

I'll admit that I'm not really a stickler for the "nice" part if it's necessary and true.

I am a stickler for "necessary" and "true." If either of those don't apply, I'll keep my mouth shut.

"True" is easy-ish. "Necessary" is the complicated one. In some cases it may still be unethical to not say something, even if you know that it's not going to be helpful in the end. If it's not unethical to keep your mouth shut, and it won't improve the situation in the short or long term, it's probably not "necessary."

[esprix]

Agreed that some people's necessary is highly subjective, but that's where the nice part ought to come in.

Personally, I think people should share nice, true things more often, even if they're unnecessary. :)

[unclrashid]

Honestly, I wish you'd either spill the gossip or go and bitch at the person you are really mad at! I hate you LJ teases!!! I want the ugly details! (grin) (just kidding, you know I don't actually have patience for things like details!)

[esprix]

Seriously. Who once told me not to bother with names if I didn't see them more than once? :P

Alas, no gossip. Just some thoughts after some conversations I've had recently. If it were about someone in particular, when have I ever been one not to name names? :) (Not that this *hasn't* applied to drama in my past, mind you, just nothing au courant.)

[unclrashid]

Love that icon. I srsly need to expand my collection of icons. If our scanner worked I could make many!